Elevate my thinking
No, Sideburns GOOD! Don't shave them off.
No, no acidicity intended here, Karen. Mark's is fine stuff. Just making an observation. Should have used a 
thingy.
I notice that Audi Nigel is getting quite acidic around the place.
Clarification: When I say 'sideburns', I am not referring to them in the Pirates of the Caribbean 'mutton chop' sense of the word, merely the bit of hair just before the ear, which inevitably gets a bit wonky because my glasses are too tight.
I hope this is now clear.
Whoops.
Everything could have been made fine by the inclusion of the word 'real' between the words 'a' and 'coffee'...
Yes I'd go with the others and say try again next time...
Sideburns are bad...shave them off! Shave them all off!
I didn't know the poison of Starbucks had spread that far...
I have had sideburns since I shaved an ill-advised beard off almost 16 years ago and I have never achieved sideburn 'balance' whether tinkering myself or entrusting it to a barber. I've demonstrated the truth of Vaughan's advice many times. My advice is to tilt your head.
Much sympathy. Also flattered that you obviously read me far too much ('When...'), as do Spengy and Zed. Such a trendsetter.
I shall offer you the crumbs of my wide experience of life (god help us all).
Possible better suggestion, considering the location: "Would you like to go out for gin sometime?" Followed by possible suggestion that you know somewhere that sells it in the same sized mugs as you get at Starbucks (which I do, in fact, but that's my secret).
As for the sideburns, leave them as they are. Whatever you do - *whatever* you do - do not try and 'correct' them, as you will spend an entire morning clipping and shaving on one side, then the other, then back to the other side, then the other . . . eventually, you will have a mohican.
There.
Bless you though. Try again next week.
i keep my sideburns uneven because they each have different personalities, and i can't bear to make either of them conform to the oppressive standard of the other.
having worked at starbucks and been duly and stupidly asked "out for coffee", i'm surprised she didn't chuck a five pound bag of guatemalan antigua at your newly-shorn head. wilting english rose, she must be. or really sweet on you.
It's a reassuring point in life that you can generally predict D's comments before he writes them.
Slag
Beer is always the way, however wine shows a certain level of class and sophistication that every now and then ladies seek.
This added level will help you pass off the unlevel sideys as "artistic flair". or sum'in.
Oh dear.
Those moments. You can feel the words irrevocably leaving your mouth with the nightmare, helpless slow-motion clarity of being in a car accident can't you?
Still, I obviously need your hairdresser.
Sorry to have missed tea. Must've stewing in unsightly reversion-to-adolsecence stupidity over a girl or some-such.
Hey ho.
You never know, it might work in your favour - she may think you're one of those adorably scruffy types who just needs a bit of mothering...
... or that could be a bit of a disadvantage, when put like that.
Hrm.
Not such a smart move on the coffee invite tho
Level side-burns are so overrated. Having unlevel ones means that you look as if your head is slightly tilted, giving you a quizzical and interested look - especially good for parties when you have to talk to drunk, boring people.
(Should have asked her out for a beer...)
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