HaloScan.com - Comments

I'MMA LET YOU FINISH

Frist!
Miserable Failure | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 5:22 pm | #

broken
snaporaz | 10.13.04 - 5:23 pm | #

Red X.
Matt | 10.13.04 - 5:23 pm | #

Mo 'Reilly ain't no 'Reilly. That's a 'Reilly bad link.
bo | 10.13.04 - 5:23 pm | #

Where?
David in NY | 10.13.04 - 5:24 pm | #

He can do wonders with that falafel thing.
busheconomy | 10.13.04 - 5:24 pm | #

GL AORE EXCLUSIVE! Image is here.
Gl Aore | 10.13.04 - 5:26 pm | #

It's still not there, Atrios.
David in NY | 10.13.04 - 5:26 pm | #

suit1.gif? Is this the image that is supposed to show up (copy 'n paste):

http://www.luigithegodfathersdog...g.com/ suit1.gif
monkey knife fight | 10.13.04 - 5:28 pm | #

OMFW!
bo | 10.13.04 - 5:29 pm | #

EEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
richard | 10.13.04 - 5:29 pm | #

I really, REALLY hope that she's got some of this on tape.
Matt | 10.13.04 - 5:29 pm | #

I'm suspicious if it's O'Reilly. At no point did he tell her to shut up or call her an idiot.
Kurt | 10.13.04 - 5:29 pm | #

Dammit, why didn't I just link to it? Answer: 'cause I'm a dumbass.

Click to see Atrios' intended image (pops in new window).
monkey knife fight | 10.13.04 - 5:30 pm | #

I see the gif -- in all of its fiendishly disturbing detail.

I may never masturbate again.

Ick.
Dude Abides | 10.13.04 - 5:30 pm | #

he wanted to touch her with the falafel thing. she's got him recorded.. its really clear he's just nailed
5dimes | 10.13.04 - 5:30 pm | #

There graphic exists on the off-site server as:

http://mywebpages.comcast.net/at...trios/ suit1.jpg
drav | 10.13.04 - 5:30 pm | #

isn't this one of the seven signs of thw apocalypse ?
xegar | 10.13.04 - 5:31 pm | #

"Yuck" doesn't cover it.

I have to go pour bleach on my brain now.
thanks loads Atrios | 10.13.04 - 5:31 pm | #

Dining tip: If O'Reilly invites you to dinner, stay away from the creamed vegetables and white sauces.
bo | 10.13.04 - 5:32 pm | #

Bill O'Reilly: the Peewee Herman of cable.
pie | 10.13.04 - 5:32 pm | #

O'Reilly... giving masturbation a bad name
rainlion | 10.13.04 - 5:32 pm | #

Bill,

That's pretty good, but in no way does it measure up to your erotic thriller books.

Yours,
Al
Dr. Evil | 10.13.04 - 5:33 pm | #

O'Reilly is always bashing rappers on his show. But he never seems to invite them on.

He's a real tough guy with Paul Krugman and Franken. I'd love to see him sitting a few feet away from Ludacris or DMX.

Comeon Bill. It's easy to bully a mild mannered Princeton professor. Let's see what you can do with a couple of gangster rappers.
SWR | 10.13.04 - 5:33 pm | #

how's "the o'reilly factor for kids" selling, by the way ?
xegar | 10.13.04 - 5:33 pm | #

I feel dirty. I don't think the hottest shower can cleanse me of this.

Once you see something like this, it can never be unseen.

Would it be over the line to wonder whether he uses the cock shaped vibrator on himself?
Dude Abides | 10.13.04 - 5:33 pm | #

The question is who left the dildo? Rumor has it that it was Ann Coulter with a dildo with a swaztika on it.
bebe rebozo | 10.13.04 - 5:34 pm | #

God I love REpublican Family Values.
Bubba | 10.13.04 - 5:34 pm | #

ummm.. shut up? no really. shut up.
Bill O'Reilly | 10.13.04 - 5:34 pm | #

It's the damndest thing. I knew Andrea...we were friends in Columbia, MO during college, and she told me some tales of her time interning in the Bush 1 White House - can you say "perverted older men"?

When I saw the name Mackris earlier without knowing the first name, I thought of her and wondered what she was up to...little did I know!

Well now I will HAVE to look her up!
DC Al | 10.13.04 - 5:34 pm | #

Holy shit.

That's gunna leave a mark in his wallet.
Barndog | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 5:34 pm | #

what's the source on this?
matt | 10.13.04 - 5:35 pm | #

She got him on tape. Beautiful.

Although I'm sorry she had to go through that. What a scumbag.
pie | 10.13.04 - 5:36 pm | #

Will O'Reilly get the Putzlitzer Prize for Whack Journaljizm?
bo | 10.13.04 - 5:36 pm | #

Comeon Bill. It's easy to bully a mild mannered Princeton professor. Let's see what you can do with a couple of gangster rappers.
SWR

You're kidding, right? Bill would piss himself if he had to face down Vanilla Ice, let alone a couple of the NWA crew.
Dude Abides | 10.13.04 - 5:36 pm | #

Say what you like, but as near as I can tell there was no spinning involved...
Roddy McCorley | 10.13.04 - 5:36 pm | #

Gross. Shocked, frightened, and upset doesn't even begin to cover it.

I thought we got pretty gross on Talk like Bill O'Reilly Day, but once again we see that even when we mock these loons, their reality far outstrips our most depraved imaginings.
Thersites | 10.13.04 - 5:36 pm | #

smoking gun has the whole thing up

O'Reilly sex suit
sukabi | 10.13.04 - 5:37 pm | #

Hey folks, lay off poor Mr. O'Liely. At least he wasn't wanking while driving. So there's no public safety issue here.
cervantes | 10.13.04 - 5:38 pm | #

Where's General J.C. Christian?

It isn't a scandal if he hasn't written an offensive letter to someone.

The Spirit of Howard Beale | 10.13.04 - 5:38 pm | #

Hey Bill, want wood?
George Bush | 10.13.04 - 5:38 pm | #

SHUT UP!!!
Olaf glad and big | 10.13.04 - 5:39 pm | #

never mind, i just found it.

it's reassuring to know this won't be spun...
matt | 10.13.04 - 5:39 pm | #

You're kidding, right? Bill would piss himself if he had to face down Vanilla Ice, let alone a couple of the NWA crew.
Dude Abides | Email | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 5:36 pm | #

Not really.

O'Reilly loves to bash rappers. He loves to bash middle-aged white liberals.

Guess which category hasn't been represented on his show?

Seriously, if O'Reilly is such a fucking tough guy, let him sit across the table from one of those rappers he loves to bash.

Let him sit across the table from P Diddy if DMX is too scary for him.
SWR | 10.13.04 - 5:39 pm | #

Smoking Gun's web server appears to have crashed and smoked from the volume.

Bill O'Liely... couldn't have happened to a nicer fella.
trifecta | 10.13.04 - 5:40 pm | #

miserable failure

Why are you always first? Must be a fire sign, maybe Aries?
meme | 10.13.04 - 5:40 pm | #

Would it be over the line to wonder whether he uses the cock shaped vibrator on himself?

Yes, but I had the same thought.

You know, reading this at dinner time may be an excellent way to lose weight.
Grep Agni | 10.13.04 - 5:40 pm | #

OT -- dunno if this has been mentioned on other threads, as I was out all afternoon and found this waiting in my e-mail. Definitely not work-safe:

Presidential Horror Show
filkertom | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 5:40 pm | #

Christmas has come early. Sinclair, now this...
jim | 10.13.04 - 5:40 pm | #

cervantes, damn you!

you are quicker than I!
smarty jones | 10.13.04 - 5:40 pm | #

Remember that episode of the Critic where the woman goes on a date with Sherman and then is shown in the shower screaming CAN'T GET CLEAN! CAN'T GET CLEAN! Slightly off topic. Did anybody watch Law and Order SVU last night? It was a muddled ripped from the headlines show about dirty tv shows, crusaders against these shows, and a Howard Stern dirty radio talker. But the Howard Stern guy had a voice that sounded a lot like Al Franken's. And the crusader against dirty tv seemed very much like Dr. Laura always screaming about her precious bunchkins but neglecting them to pursue her cause.
sekmet | 10.13.04 - 5:40 pm | #

I'm sorry, but old Republican men dealing in sexual harrassment... Well, that just gives me the bejeebies.

I haven't been so creeped out since reading David Brock's book and hearing about Drudge hitting on him. (Not because of the gay thing, but because of the Drudge thing... ech.)
Kurt | 10.13.04 - 5:41 pm | #

he. those 9/11 commemorative coins with "silver recovered from ground zero" are fraudulent in every conceivable way.
Olaf glad and big | 10.13.04 - 5:41 pm | #

There is something gross about involving someone else in your masturbation like that. I can see why she might feel used and humiliated, assuming that the story is true.

But I can never look at a loofah again in my whole life...
Echidne | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 5:42 pm | #

Putzlitzer Prize for Whack Journaljizm
-bo

I like the way you think.
Anonymous | 10.13.04 - 5:42 pm | #

There IS a God!

Man, I can't wait to tune into Franken's show tomorrow....
Philalethes | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 5:42 pm | #

off topic

Nader off the ballot in PA and OH

yee-ha
antichimp | 10.13.04 - 5:43 pm | #

"Would it be over the line to wonder whether he uses the cock shaped vibrator on himself?"

Read the whole complaint...all questions are answered.
Matt | 10.13.04 - 5:43 pm | #

There's a vibrator on sale named "Bill."
It's guaranteed to deliver a thrill.
It's shaped like a cock,
And is hard as a rock.
If you shout, it'll play Jack to your Jill.
Lime Rickey | 10.13.04 - 5:43 pm | #

Wow, she felt 'trapped'? Well boo-hoo-hoo.

At least she didn't feel splattered all over her kitchen walls with her children.

Time to break out the cow's blood and do the lobby at Faux again.

--
Paul | 10.13.04 - 5:43 pm | #

This line just keeps working...

TONIGHT'S TALKING POINT...IS IN MY PANTS!
attaturk | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 5:43 pm | #

Loofah in shower scene. Ya all got to read page 16
trifecta | 10.13.04 - 5:44 pm | #

i remember a great news item back when the pee wee herman story broke : trash collectors in NYC reported an epidemic of pee wee dolls being thrown out. there were thousands of them found in the garbage, tossed out by parents. lets hope that "the o'reilly factor for kids" follows that pattern.

.
xegar | 10.13.04 - 5:45 pm | #

funniest thread yet, sad thing, it isn't funny.

i know it has been said but let me reiterate, ewwwwwwwwww. it disgusts me (a heterosexual male) even to look at him, can you imagine? no don't.
charley | 10.13.04 - 5:45 pm | #

Think he'll use Limbaughs tactics and claim he was addicted to sex, go to rehab, and then claim he's cured?
Central Scrutinizer | 10.13.04 - 5:45 pm | #

SWR -

I'd rather see him with Sug Knight.
Dude Abides | 10.13.04 - 5:45 pm | #

Anyone read O'Reilly's latest?
wÒÓ† | 10.13.04 - 5:46 pm | #

But I can never look at a loofah again in my whole life...
Echidne

Well, the Right's been trying to get us to abstain for a long, long time...and now that I've got images like these in my head, I may not have a choice anymore.

If anything could engender a loathing for the sins of the flesh in yours truly, it'd be O'Reilly jerking off while barking out commands to some poor woman.
Philalethes | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 5:46 pm | #

What happened? It was there a minute ago?
bcf | 10.13.04 - 5:46 pm | #

What goes around, comes around

Novak-slips in tub, dislocates hip

Rush-prescription drugs

now only if Ben Ginsburg would......
meme | 10.13.04 - 5:46 pm | #

I liked the quote: "O'Reilly's eyes became glazed and bizarrely strayed in opposite directions."

Doesn't he do that every show?
cheney_usa | 10.13.04 - 5:47 pm | #

So now I know it's possible to laugh and gag at the same time. Thanks.
mena | 10.13.04 - 5:47 pm | #

Oh God, please let there be a taped transcript.
jeffs | 10.13.04 - 5:47 pm | #

can you imagine? no don't.

Gee, thanks, charley...
pie | 10.13.04 - 5:48 pm | #

Damn, I never had a woman give me a vibrator. I guess I'm in the wrong business...
NTodd | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 5:48 pm | #

Damn, and I have a hell of a crop of luffah gourds this year......
Central Scrutinizer | 10.13.04 - 5:48 pm | #

My wife just said she does not want to shower with me tonight. Gee Thanks Bill.
trifecta | 10.13.04 - 5:48 pm | #

Damn, and I have a hell of a crop of luffah gourds this year......
Central Scrutinizer | 10.13.04 - 5:48 pm | #

My wife just said she does not want to shower with me tonight. Gee Thanks Bill.
trifecta | 10.13.04 - 5:48 pm | #

Damn, and I have a hell of a crop of luffah gourds this year......
Central Scrutinizer | 10.13.04 - 5:48 pm | #

My wife just said she does not want to shower with me tonight. Gee Thanks Bill.
trifecta | 10.13.04 - 5:48 pm | #

the spin stops hereRRRRRRRRR!!!!
Billy O' | 10.13.04 - 5:48 pm | #

Is he married? I, frankly, have no idea, and cannot imagine any woman who would willingly sleep with him every night, but I digress. In addition to being disgusting and a perverted criminal, can we also paint him with the hypocrite brush?
TJ | 10.13.04 - 5:48 pm | #

Talking Pee Wee Herman dolls are collector's items now.

http://tinyurl.com/679by
sekmet | 10.13.04 - 5:48 pm | #

wÒÓ†,
Given the author's name, wonder if he write about safe sex too.
bo | 10.13.04 - 5:49 pm | #

Christmas has come early. Sinclair, now this...

No shit. Plus the Mystery Bulge, Delay shennanigans, and multiple investiagtions still lurking in the darkness. Could the "October Surprise" be a complete unravelling of the conservative Axis?
Anonymous | 10.13.04 - 5:49 pm | #

Norman 'O'Reilly' Bates.

"No, mother, I won't use that vibrator on myself. NO! No!!! No--oh, oh...."

He turns one of the chairs on his set around, and there is the mummified Mom O'Reilly.

The original No Spin Crone.

--
Paul | 10.13.04 - 5:49 pm | #

Is he married?

Yes, but not for long.

Central Scrutinizer | 10.13.04 - 5:49 pm | #

please let there be a tape.

This is some sick stuff.

see page 16 and 17 to get right to the worst of it.
sonocle | 10.13.04 - 5:50 pm | #

i think this qualifies as the most ridicules item of the day
xegar | 10.13.04 - 5:50 pm | #

We need to call into Bill's talk show and try to be the first one to scream "loofah" and get it on the air.

Bill "Loofinator" O'Reilly would find it amusing.
trifecta | 10.13.04 - 5:50 pm | #

If this unravels as these types of scandals usually do, the women should start coming out of the woodwork.
cheney_usa | 10.13.04 - 5:50 pm | #

SWR -

I'd rather see him with Sug Knight.
Dude Abides | Email | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 5:45 pm | #

That's what he sounds like in that little clip about Ailes and Franken. He sounds like a gangster.

I guess it's easy to be a gangster when you're up against Paul Krugman. Let him try it against the real thing.

Has anybody heard Franken tell the story about how O'Reilly's staff threatened the son of a 9/11 surviver? It seems they put him on the show and he hit them with some kind of leftist rhetoric on Bush and O'Reilly said something like "get out of the building now before one of my guys goes to jail over you".

I think the guy they threatened was a grad student at Rutgers or something.

Hell, I'd like to see him try the tough act on Sharpton. Let him threaten Sharpton with a knock on the door. I'm no fan of Al, but I think he could handle himself in a situation like this.
SWR | 10.13.04 - 5:50 pm | #

Damn, I never had a woman give me a vibrator. I guess I'm in the wrong business...

I'm not sure how I'd feel if a woman gave me a COCK SHAPED VIBRATOR. What is she trying to tell me??????
Marcus Wellby | 10.13.04 - 5:50 pm | #

Holy Christ, after reading the rest at the smoking gun, its clear that his threats regarding what Ailes will do to her if she talks really amount to a sexual assault. Bill belongs in jail, fuck the lawsuit.
Dude Abides

Dude,

I have not read the complaint, but do you have any indication that Ailes was in any way knowledgeable about this harassment? Is FOX also getting sued?
smarty jones | 10.13.04 - 5:52 pm | #

Man, everybody posting at the speed of light. I don't think everybody posted this quickly during the debates.

The only thing is, I'm a big believer in if something is too good to be true, then it usually isn't.

But if this is true, then this is fucking hilarious proof that there is a G-d.
Anonymous | 10.13.04 - 5:52 pm | #

The "No Sponge Zone".
cheney_usa | 10.13.04 - 5:52 pm | #

What the hell is the flafel thing?

Possibly more importantly, would I have wanted one, before O'Reilly made the thought of one repulsive?
David (Austin Tx) | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 5:52 pm | #

OT-way OT. Wife and boys are in D.C. and want to watch the debates with fellow Dems. They are staying in the Westin Hotel. Anyone know of Dems meeting anywhere. They thought it would be cool to watch the debate in the capitol. Once again, thanks in advance for any help.
nashvegasdawg | 10.13.04 - 5:52 pm | #

I expect all males who need the comfort of the vibrator for stimulation to step forward and proclaim their solidarity with Bill.

Really!

JohnLalo | 10.13.04 - 5:53 pm | #

I'm not sure how I'd feel if a woman gave me a COCK SHAPED VIBRATOR. What is she trying to tell me??????
Marcus Wellby

Go F . . . nahhh, too easy.

Dick Cheney | 10.13.04 - 5:53 pm | #

Here'a PDF of the entire O'Reilly Lawsuit culled from The Smoking Gun.
Right click to download.

I almost feel sorry for the guy.... not.
Guy | 10.13.04 - 5:53 pm | #

Hell, I'd like to see him try the tough act on Sharpton. Let him threaten Sharpton with a knock on the door. I'm no fan of Al, but I think he could handle himself in a situation like this.
SWR | Email | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 5:50 pm |

Sharpton would bitch slap his ass and then take his wallet just for the trouble.

Bill is a punk-ass bitch. Even Kid Rock would kick his ass.
Dude Abides | 10.13.04 - 5:54 pm | #

never has something this disgusting made me this happy!

I can't wait for the next new Daily Show!!!
jeebs | 10.13.04 - 5:56 pm | #

What. An. Idiot.

And he decided to sue her?

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!

good thing he has a big checkbook, cause he's well and truly fucked.
four legs good | 10.13.04 - 5:56 pm | #

OK, let's see...
we have racist Sinclair operatives, Sex pervert O'Lieley, drug addict/dealer Rush, gamble-o-holic Bennett... and these are just a few of the latest family values crowd.

I prefer to call them phoney Pharisees.
bigvic | 10.13.04 - 5:56 pm | #

Give it a name?
Jimmy the Saint | 10.13.04 - 5:57 pm | #

The cheap whore. What in the hell did she expect. When you watch the O'Reilly Factor, that's what you get. Decent people would never be watching. Usually he is just screwing everyone in sight.
Anonymous | 10.13.04 - 5:57 pm | #

Page 17 #81: "During the course of Defendant BILL O'REILLY's sexual rant, it became clear that he was using a vibrator upon himself, and that he ejaculated. Plaintiff was repulsed."

Aren't we all.
John Gillnitz | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 5:57 pm | #

What would be really great is videotapes surfacing...O'Reilly wanking away for all he's worth, then chattering about God knows what self-aggrandizing nonsense: "That had to be a gallon right there. A gallon, minimum. I'm going to measure it, get the facts straight, but I've been doing this a long time and I think I know a gallon when I see it. They say the male sexual peak is at eighteen...don't know who they're talking to, but I'm still spraying it out like a race horse. I'll go up against any eighteen-year-old you can name, and he better bring his galoshes."

And next to his head, one of those summary boxes:

*That was at least a gallon of ejaculate.
*Bill is still spurting semen like a race horse.
*Bill challenges any young man to out-ejaculate him.
*Wear galoshes; it'll be messy.

(shudder)
Philalethes | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 5:58 pm | #

Damn, I never had a woman give me a vibrator. I guess I'm in the wrong business...

Who among us has not received a vibrator "shaped like a cock with a little battery in it" from a woman?
Mustard is Evil | 10.13.04 - 5:58 pm | #

Tape! We need a tape, on the 'net!

Wonder what John Stewart'll say; O'Reilly was just on his show flogging his book, "The O'Reilly Factor for Kids."

Hoo boy!
jeffs | 10.13.04 - 5:58 pm | #

My brain cells just jumped ship.
kel. | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 5:58 pm | #

Sigh.
I love the Internets so! fucking!! much!!!
Anonymous | 10.13.04 - 5:58 pm | #

Give it a name?
Jimmy the Saint

How about "Widowmaker"?
Philalethes | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 5:59 pm | #

"What goes around, comes around. Novak-slips in tub, dislocates hip"

Novak appears to need more instructions from O'Shutup on how to use his cock-head vibrator.

Either that, or he can't locate his ass, because he's been inside it so long.

--
Paul | 10.13.04 - 6:00 pm | #

How about Mr. Shush?
Jimmy the Saint | 10.13.04 - 6:00 pm | #

This story makes the Bukkake Hannity rumors believable.

Hannity in a NYC downtown club in the middle of a circle jerk? You decide.

....
vivian | 10.13.04 - 6:01 pm | #

wow. the jimmy cliff song about "the harder they come, the harder they fall" applies several ways here
xegar | 10.13.04 - 6:01 pm | #

Gonna go hang with Barack Obama for the debate tonite? Any other Chicagoans going?
Yoshimi | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 6:02 pm | #

...such as when he received a massage in a cabana in Bali and the "little short brown woman" asked to see his penis and was "amazed".

Is this for real? God, if there is a tape ..well then there must be a god.
Spinoza | 10.13.04 - 6:03 pm | #

I'm just surprised the victim wasn't a small boy.
Grand Moff Texan | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 6:03 pm | #

Philalethes @ 5:58 pm

Absolutely priceless!!
Gunner | 10.13.04 - 6:04 pm | #

Smarty--she sued Fox and Westwood One(O'Reilly's radio outfit I imagine) for creating a "sexually hostile working environment." Her case against Fox will be harder to prove, but then again, knowing their penchant for emails, maybe not.
Guy--thanks for putting it into a single pdf.
TJ | 10.13.04 - 6:04 pm | #

Brings new meaning to the legal phrase,
"Comes the plaintiff . . . "
particle man | 10.13.04 - 6:05 pm | #

Yuuckkkkkkk!
He never was physically or intellectually attractive - now he is so crummy and scummy. He reminds one of those creepy strangers who come up to gals on the street, open up their black overcoats revealing their c---, and say something utterly filthy.
Repulsive Reilly!!!!
Dorothy M. Ligon | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 6:05 pm | #

*That was at least a gallon of ejaculate.
*Bill is still spurting semen like a race horse.
*Bill challenges any young man to out-ejaculate him.
*Wear galoshes; it'll be messy.

(shudder)
Philalethes

Seriously, that's the funniest thing I've read in the past month.
Dave J. | 10.13.04 - 6:05 pm | #

Tremendous.
Adam | 10.13.04 - 6:05 pm | #

Vivian--Hannity's personality makes the bukkake rumors believable. This is just icing on the cake. (No pun intended--yet another food item to avoid at House of Bill--yecchhh!!!)
TJ | 10.13.04 - 6:06 pm | #

I suggested earlier that everyone e-mail Olbermann about the Nevada registration story. He's on now; he's doing it.

Go! Watch!
Barry Champlain | 10.13.04 - 6:07 pm | #

Where are you watching the debate with Barack Obama?
Alyssa | 10.13.04 - 6:07 pm | #

i wonder if his wife will enter the no-spin zone ?
xegar | 10.13.04 - 6:07 pm | #

How about Mr. Shush?
Jimmy the Saint | Email | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 6:00 pm | #

How about Phil O'Reilly

.
Aaron Bedford | 10.13.04 - 6:08 pm | #

My fave part was at their dinner date when suddenly his eyes glaze over and stared in different directions and he began speaking *lewdly* Doesn't he always

Gives all new meaning to "Who Looking out for You?"

bigvic | 10.13.04 - 6:09 pm | #

oh, my day has just been made. couldn't happen to a more deserving bastard.. err.. guy
Johnny Vagabond | 10.13.04 - 6:10 pm | #

Can someone let me in on this Hannity thing? Seriously, what is the rumor, and when did it start?
Dave J. | 10.13.04 - 6:10 pm | #

I'll never be able
to loofah again

farewell

exfoliating gourd

I'll send you to
O'Reilly
he will appreciate
you're still hard
Anonymous | 10.13.04 - 6:11 pm | #

"I prefer to call them phoney Pharisees.
bigvic"

That's a slander of Pharisees, who at least followed the religious rituals to perfection. These are more like phoney martini golfers with cow shit on their cleats.

Yesterday I spent part of the protest at the window of buses, telling the (mostly Latino and Black) people that if they planned on voting for CAESAR, they might as well skip going to church.

Appropriate looks of horror.

--
Paul | 10.13.04 - 6:12 pm | #

How could healthy person possible be aroused by, let alone get off to, the idea of tricking someone like this? This is completely gross. Even fantasy-rape within a fictional context that does not affect others is far better than this, because this is a need to actually deceive and hurt a real person. Or it's incredible arrogance, which as dumb as O is, is unlikely. If this is true he is ten times the douchebag we thought he was back when he was physically threatening the IX/XI survivor.
kei & yuri throw up now! | 10.13.04 - 6:12 pm | #

This brings back disturbing images of Jack Nicholson's character, Jonathan Fuerst in the film Carnal Knowledge. The "sessions" he has with the Rita Moreno at the end of the film remind me of BIG Bill O'Pervo.
Jimmy the Saint | 10.13.04 - 6:13 pm | #

Man, I know O'Liely gives off bad vibes, but I never knew it was literal.
Octospider | 10.13.04 - 6:13 pm | #

"farewell

exfoliating gourd"

Winner, 2004 Victorian Poetry contest.

Bush's head is going to look like an exfoliating gourd if he doesn't just walk away.

--
Paul | 10.13.04 - 6:14 pm | #

OT - I think Chimpy's "interNETS gaffe ought to retire the wingnut chestnut about Al Gore inventing the internet since their boy Dubya just manufactured more of them straight out of his ass
The Crapture | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 6:16 pm | #

Does Drudge have this up yet?
Central Scrutinizer | 10.13.04 - 6:16 pm | #

This is the funniest thread I've seen in weeks. Kudos.
Personal | 10.13.04 - 6:17 pm | #

Author! Author! ??
Sue | 10.13.04 - 6:17 pm | #

Yep, he does!
Central Scrutinizer | 10.13.04 - 6:18 pm | #

But, but, he's a family man with small kids.
steve_gilliard | 10.13.04 - 6:18 pm | #

When do we get to see the out-takes from Bill's interview with Furious G where he asks him about his preference in vibrators?
particle man | 10.13.04 - 6:20 pm | #

So far I like the October surprises just fine. More like this..
Karin | 10.13.04 - 6:20 pm | #

Sign the deposition, jack mehoffer.
moeman | 10.13.04 - 6:23 pm | #

The only thing that could make this any better is the revelation that O'Reilly was using one of these.

It brings a whole new meaning to "Second Coming."
Philalethes | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 6:24 pm | #

Unfortunately, O'Reilly probably only communicates with with women like Ann Coulter...hence the prehensile sexual fantasies
andyw | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 6:25 pm | #

So far I like the October surprises just fine. More like this..

I'm with you. And I think the other was just a failed effort to de-energize the dems.

Fuck that. georgie's going down.

Worst. President. Ever.
pie | 10.13.04 - 6:25 pm | #

Everybody's gotta loofa somebody...
andyw | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 6:26 pm | #

Well, at least he's practicing safe sex...

Good, good, good, good vibrations.....
f | 10.13.04 - 6:27 pm | #

It brings a whole new meaning to "Second Coming."

You are so bad, good, bad, good...
pie | 10.13.04 - 6:27 pm | #

OK, now if _this_ doesn't win him that Pee-buddy award then _nothing_ will.
Randomfactor | 10.13.04 - 6:27 pm | #

This is the funniest thread I've seen in ages. Thank you all for making me sit at my desk trying to supress the laughter that kept trying to force its way through my tightly clenched lips.
commie atheist | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 6:28 pm | #

Mr. O'Reilly is merely a part of a long history.

http://www-rohan.sdsu.edu/~delmare/

.
Aaron Bedford | 10.13.04 - 6:28 pm | #

"How about Mr. Shush?
Jimmy the Saint | Email | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 6:00 pm | #

How about Phil O'Reilly"

"79. During the course of this monologue, Defendant BILL O'REILLY suggested that he would perform oral sex upon Plaintiff ANDREA MACKRIS, and that she would start to perform fellatio upon his "big cock"...."

Ladies and Gentlemen......

BILL ORALLY
roxtar | 10.13.04 - 6:29 pm | #

Even Drudge has this story. With that "warning" contains blah blah blah (i.e. stuff you'll really want to know about) contents.

Couldn't be sweeter!
JohnLalo | 10.13.04 - 6:29 pm | #

mmmm ... falafel
homer simpson | 10.13.04 - 6:29 pm | #

I gave up on suppressing the giggles, and sent avatar's link out to the office mates. Laughter can be heard for cubicles around.
TJ | 10.13.04 - 6:32 pm | #

WTF?

I always figured O'Reilly was yet another Rethug closet homosexual. I didn't realize he was straight ...
DAS | 10.13.04 - 6:33 pm | #

O'Reilly... with a capital "O"
Little Bill | 10.13.04 - 6:34 pm | #

God, I haven't laughed this hard since I don't know when
Anon from Ireland | 10.13.04 - 6:34 pm | #

In my neck of the woods we have a phrase for this kind of behavior.

All.Kinds.of.Wrong.

And just to add my immediate reaction upon reading the suit....

EWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!
Sharon | 10.13.04 - 6:35 pm | #

FREEPERS REACT TO O'REILLY SCANDAL!

"Fox News had the brass ring of leadership and dropped it cold, to support the vermin that calls themselves the Democrat Party. That low life Bill O'Reilly is a closet supporter of John 'the traitor' Kerry."

"I deem sexual harassment only when there is threat to employment. Otherwise it is very dangerous allowing liberal woman in the work place to throw about accusations whenever it suits their interests or political agendaa."

"I stopped watching O'Reilly about 18 months ago when he revealed his rather peculiar thoughts regarding homosexuality and religion. Basically he just said that he's all for homoesexuals and doesn't care what they do in their bedroom, and he thought that atheism was just fine. I forget his actual words, but they were such a turnoff I turned O'Reilly off for good."

"Hope they cancel his show. Then, Brit & Co. could take over the time slot."

"I hope it's not true. But if it is, I've got a solution to Fox's problem -- Ann Coulter."

Wowsers! The Freepers and we are happy about the same event! WHEN WORLDS COLLIDE!
FreeperReport | 10.13.04 - 6:37 pm | #

I think i'mgonna be sick...ugh!
Spanner | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 6:37 pm | #

Don't forget to watch LAST EVER O'Reilly Factor tonight at 8pm. Bill Richardson is on!
Anonymous | 10.13.04 - 6:38 pm | #

WTF?

I always figured O'Reilly was yet another Rethug closet homosexual. I didn't realize he was straight ...
DAS | Email | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 6:33 pm | #

Actually, the kind of misogyny(sp?) displayed by Mr. O'Reilly is a sign of a deeper underlying REPRESSED homosexuality. He doesn't even know he's gay.

Face your demons Bill! The truth shall set you free.

.
Aaron Bedford | 10.13.04 - 6:39 pm | #

So sexual harrassment is a-okay with these freeper clowns who spent eight years rupturing themselves in a rage over Bubba the Grabber of Women.
sekmet | 10.13.04 - 6:41 pm | #

Did you ever think that maybe the Bushites got word that O'Reilly was gonna endorse Kerry, and this is their preemptive strike.

Nothing is as it appears at first glance.
notway | 10.13.04 - 6:43 pm | #

O'Reilly... with a capital "O"
Little Bill | 10.13.04 - 6:43 pm | #

Philalethes -- that post is the funniest thing I've read in a while. Especially the last bullet-point.

Matt
Matt | 10.13.04 - 6:46 pm | #

Did you ever think that maybe the Bushites got word that O'Reilly was gonna endorse Kerry, and this is their preemptive strike.

I don't care. He deserves anything he gets.
pie | 10.13.04 - 6:48 pm | #

Do you think he showed his 'O' face?
Miso Hawnee | 10.13.04 - 6:49 pm | #

just another tuesday in my world biasheseseesses.
jason | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 6:55 pm | #

"Can someone let me in on this Hannity thing? Seriously, what is the rumor, and when did it start?"
Dave J.

I'm no expert, but I'm given to understand that Bukkake involves a number of men ejaculating on another man.Hannity is rumored to have been seen in the center of a circle jerk in a private room at a NYC club.Some say there are photographs.
It would certainly be Hannity's personal business if he didn't make his living shilling for the family values crowd and had never snooped into Clinton's personal life.

....
vivian | 10.13.04 - 6:55 pm | #

Do you think he showed his 'O' face?
Miso Hawnee

Gah! Ack! Kaf!

Don't say things like that!

Ugh...I wonder how blotchy his face got while he was "pleasuring" himself?
Philalethes | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 6:55 pm | #

I'll send you to
O'Reilly
he will appreciate
you're still hard
Anonymous

Now that would be funny, we should start a loofah's for O'Liely campaign, flood the Faux News offices with thousands of loofahs, Somebody called George Soros, we need 300,000 loofahs to send to O'Liely.
krsaz | 10.13.04 - 6:56 pm | #

Perhaps we should simply call him the 'Big O' from here on out...
Octospider | 10.13.04 - 6:57 pm | #

>Perhaps we should simply call him the 'Big O' from here on out...<

Oh Yeah, That one's going to stick.
Big O it is then.
Jimmy the Saint | 10.13.04 - 6:58 pm | #

They need a new video/DVD series " MIDDLE AGED WHITE CONSERVATIVES GO WILD!!!
King Coody | 10.13.04 - 7:00 pm | #

Sean Hannikkake
--
Anonymous | 10.13.04 - 7:02 pm | #

Hey, at least the guy isn't a hypocrite. I hear Teresa Kerry has a vibrator shaped like a cock with two energy-wasting BIG batteries in it.

I can hear Letterman's Top Ten List of names for Bill O'Reilly's vibrator now...

3. "Charlene"
2. "October Surprise"
1. "Sean"
Moli | 10.13.04 - 7:03 pm | #

Bill O'Reilly: Shut up! I'm coming!
Jefe | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 7:05 pm | #

>MIDDLE AGED WHITE CONSERVATIVES GO WILD!!!<

How about. BLOATED SPLOTCHY FACED HYPOCRITE BULLY GETS BUSTED".
Anonymous | 10.13.04 - 7:05 pm | #

Philalethes, you are one sick bastard.

I'm still laughing my ass off.
Jennifer | 10.13.04 - 7:10 pm | #

I'm no expert, but I'm given to understand that Bukkake involves a number of men ejaculating on another man.Hannity is rumored to have been seen in the center of a circle jerk in a private room at a NYC club.Some say there are photographs.

This practice started in Japan. (Bukake is a Japanese word.) Typically, a woman who loves facials
would get it from several men standing in circle and masturbating. That practice propagated into the West within the gay community.
ecoast | 10.13.04 - 7:30 pm | #

Philalethes, patent those words!!
TALL16 | 10.13.04 - 7:35 pm | #

it's bill clinton's influence that made 'ol orange hair turn onanist.
Anonymous | 10.13.04 - 7:45 pm | #

obviously, it's a forgery by al franken and uh terry mcauliffe? or someone who's just interested in partisan politics.
C-plus Augustus | Homepage | 10.13.04 - 7:57 pm | #

Sean Hannity
Felix Deutsch | 10.13.04 - 8:05 pm | #

Ooooooooooooooooooooooofaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah
Loooooooooooooooooooooofaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

It's the Settlement and Confidentiality Clause Zone at 8 on your bare and phlanxed flooze source ----FAUX Flooze

Terry Gross is happy he walked out early now. He had to get back to the looooofah
Anonymous | 10.13.04 - 8:59 pm | #

Man oh man, you guys are hilarious!! As someone who has been on the receiving end of sexual harrassment, O'Reilly now makes me sicker than ever. Thanks for the laughs - they helped calm me down a bit.
Charlotte Smith (nee Beavers) | 10.13.04 - 9:09 pm | #

it puts the vibrator on its skin.......yes yes YES YES SHUUUTTTT UPPPPPP!
furious george | 10.13.04 - 10:57 pm | #

I think Bill likes the Ralphie too.
I got a Ralphie!! | 10.14.04 - 12:04 am | #

That rambling threat directed against Franken and anyone else who "messes with Fox; was that not terroristic threatening in most states?

Lock this perverted bastard up, he would make a fine prison Bitch for someone.
Trammell Winterfire | Homepage | 10.14.04 - 12:16 am | #

Where's General J.C. Christian?

It isn't a scandal if he hasn't written an offensive letter to someone.

It's a scandal.
patriotboy | Homepage | 10.14.04 - 2:06 am | #

Well I feel sorry about Al Franken. According to Oreally Franken makes his livelihood out of harassing him.
So I guess poor old Al will be out of material when they fire Oreally.
On the other side there are so many more where that came from, so Al will probably find something new.

Bitz | 10.14.04 - 4:00 am | #

A loofah mitt on a woman's vulva is not the best foreplay.

Sadistic misogyny much, Bill?
jus' sayin' | 10.14.04 - 9:28 am | #

In England, "the old Bill" is slang for the cops. Here in the colonies, I think we just found a new euphemism for vibrator.

Now somebody cue up that oldie, "Big Bad Bill is Sued William Now."
Big Bad Bill | 10.14.04 - 10:56 am | #

Is anyone really surprised?

I mean, c'mon......we're all well aware of the right wing's complete absence of respect for women.
Assclowns like Bill O'Reilly really do believe that a woman's "place" is either behind a man or under him.

Once again, the "Family Values" folks have demonstrated their hypocrisy!
Terry C | Homepage | 10.14.04 - 1:32 pm | #

I don't like O'Reilly but WHY are you making THESE thugs out to be heroes???

They have no more respect for women than the GOP....and they hate gays every bit as music.

Besides, ever listen to them try to speak? It's embarassing. You need sub-titles!
===========================

"O'Reilly is always bashing rappers on his show. But he never seems to invite them on.

He's a real tough guy with Paul Krugman and Franken. I'd love to see him sitting a few feet away from Ludacris or DMX.

Comeon Bill. It's easy to bully a mild mannered Princeton professor. Let's see what you can do with a couple of gangster rappers."
Terry C | Homepage | 10.14.04 - 1:34 pm | #

OOPS.

I MEANT to say:

They [rappers] hate gays every bit as MUCH!

Hard to type when po'ed!
Terry C | Homepage | 10.14.04 - 1:35 pm | #

"Hey, at least the guy isn't a hypocrite. I hear Teresa Kerry has a vibrator shaped like a cock with two energy-wasting BIG batteries in it."

Oh, right - real fucking classy!
Terry C | Homepage | 10.14.04 - 1:37 pm | #

"Bill is a punk-ass bitch. Even Kid Rock would kick his ass."

Errrr....Kid Rock is on THEIR side.

He's one of the biggest war cheerleaders out there (didn't see him rushing to sign up, though).
Terry C | Homepage | 10.14.04 - 1:42 pm | #

In Aaron Brown's story on this they reported that Bill not only launched a countersuit against his accuser but is claiming that this is a plot by the Democrats, as the woman's lawyer has donated to the Democratic Party in the past.

Don't most trial lawyers??? And hasn't he railed against that on his show like a jillion times?
Windhorse | 10.14.04 - 10:51 pm | #

grrrowwwwlllll....patriotboy is a real heterosexual man when he's in the shower with another soldier. What a tiger.
Anonymous | 10.15.04 - 7:44 pm | #

Characters Remaining:
Commenting by HaloScan