HaloScan.com - Comments

I'MMA LET YOU FINISH

slow thinking AQQQQQaHER9 (darn cat) here too
Nick Carraway | 12.04.04 - 2:15 pm | #

WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSSSSSSHHHHH!!!!!!!
Speedy the Sperm | 12.04.04 - 2:16 pm | #

Well, looking forward a lot more liberal whining and cheesy conspiracy theories, as well as the usual hatred for Bush, America and Christianity.
Freedom Isn't Free | 12.04.04 - 2:17 pm | #

Speedy the Sperm just gets faster and faster. Clearly, someone is not having a slow day.
Hecate | 12.04.04 - 2:18 pm | #

Speedy, I'm a big fan of your work and am praying for the day when Spermatazoan-Americans get all of the rights of citizenship.
Gen. JC Christian, patriot | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:18 pm | #

hatred, Bush, America and Christianity

GRE question: Which of these doesn't fit with the other three? Explain...
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 2:19 pm | #

Slow day, my ass! I've been laughing myself silly today.
bigvic | 12.04.04 - 2:19 pm | #

Hatred for Bush? Check.
Hatred for Christianity? Check.
Hatred for America? Nah. Just certain places.
JK47 | 12.04.04 - 2:21 pm | #

Hint: It's the one that begins with "A"...
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 2:21 pm | #

Speedy the Sperm just gets faster and faster. Clearly, someone is not having a slow day.

i was more of a Ziggy the Zygote kinda guy ... especially since the NRA was looking into arming fetuses to bend towards the moral agenda under which we find ourselves oppressed as renegade socialists .. err .. democrats, according the fair and balanced cabal
syntallic | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:21 pm | #

Konopelli and the "Fight Club" gang and bebe ate responsible for my splitting sides.
bigvic | 12.04.04 - 2:21 pm | #

CSPAN2-Omigod, Liddy Dole is actually worse than I expected, and I was obviously biased against her anyway. The ferret vomit must have been some sort of neurotoxin.The audience is soporific. All she is doing is quoting anybody from John Wayne to Sponge Bob. She is completely whacked out. AGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!
bebe rebozo | 12.04.04 - 2:22 pm | #

Nope, if you're looking for Christianity-hatred, you'll have to head here.
TJ | 12.04.04 - 2:22 pm | #

Well, looking forward a lot more liberal whining and cheesy conspiracy theories, as well as the usual hatred for Bush, America and Christianity.
Freedom Isn't Free

Oops, looks like you forgot to include "fag lovers" in your tirade.
Stinky | 12.04.04 - 2:22 pm | #

OMG, now the General is in the house. Testoserone alert!
bigvic | 12.04.04 - 2:23 pm | #

bigvic, My Christmas wish for you is the opportunity to experience first hand (or foot, which ever implement is best suited to the event) the look of utter surprise and astonishment when you clock some Fascist bully really good...
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 2:24 pm | #

I've got two items:

Bush's "misspeak" this morning. We are a large company, I mean country. Yeah, we know what you really think.

Second, I love how those abstinence-only freaks who told our kids that touching each other's genitals leads to pregnancy and other lies defended themselves. Really, they never bothered to try. Instead, they just showed the same dishonesty in their defense as they did in their programs. They never addressed the lies at all.
up2date | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:24 pm | #

syntallic,

You could woo Michelle by telling her you'll let her keep her maiden name and you'll move her somewhere a bit more exciting than the exburbs. Should work.
Hecate | 12.04.04 - 2:24 pm | #

My wife just left to go fight the Crusades (Xmas shopping at the Galleria). She left in full armour - GoGo boots, Coach bag, and armed with all the latest armaments (visa/mastercard/American Express).
chris/tx | 12.04.04 - 2:25 pm | #

Well, looking forward a lot more liberal whining and cheesy conspiracy theories, as well as the usual hatred for Bush, America and Christianity.
Freedom Isn't Free | Email | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:17 pm | #

I'll let you in on something FIF.

Here you see represented the not-so-small segment of America that stops the entire world from writing off the USA as a completely dumbarsed, religionutty, jingoistic moronhead wasteland that should be left to economic implosion, environmental destruction, military overreaching, or theocratic dictatorship. Or any combination of the preceding.
Magnum | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:25 pm | #

I meant to send the troll to the Rude Pundit but haloscan seems to be screwing up links today.
TJ | 12.04.04 - 2:25 pm | #

bebe,

liddy traded in the bouffant hairdo for a tinfoil hat as soon as she realized that her degenerate husband couldn't beat a womanizer for dog catcher of arkansas

sound something like this on CSPAN: "One more word about your period. When it finally comes, you may find it a good idea to use a "sanitary napkin" to help staunch the massive loss of precious, irreplaceable fluids from your vitals. If so, beware of fast-talking sales pitches claiming the Tampax-type tampon is preferable to the Kotex-type external napkin. The former may be somewhat more convenient, but it can lead both to unwanted feelings and risking your stock in the marriage market. As for the slight icky odor that occasionally results from the safer, saner napkin, a schpritz of feminine deodorant, Glade, or liquid benzene should make your strolls upwind of kennels and dog shows free from any possible danger of embarrassment."
syntallic | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:27 pm | #

I hate Bush. I hate christianity. I hate America.

Ok, I'm done for the day. I think that was everything.
LOL
Tena | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:27 pm | #

As a matter of historical interest, and for what it's worth, I think I was probably one of the first "Atomic" zygotes. I was conceived in Santa Fe about 280 days before 4/20/46, which is about the time the USA was lighting off the world's first atomic explosion, down at the Trinity site...which I always thought might help explain my fiery temperament...
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 2:28 pm | #

Not if you read the news here
elvis56 | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:29 pm | #

konopelli - well, that explains a lot.

(I keed)

I was a DES baby, which is probably worse.
Tena | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:29 pm | #

You could woo Michelle by telling her you'll let her keep her maiden name and you'll move her somewhere a bit more exciting than the exburbs. Should work.
Hecate

i just want to pimp her out in santa monica, no biggies .... ha ... culture shock, my ass, i can get downright deranged when the course of freedom is at stake.
syntallic | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:29 pm | #

Why am I not surprised that Maglalang's blog has no comments -- only trackbacks with excerpts like this: "Michelle Malkin is having to endure juvenile taunts about her maiden name by folks who claim to promote tolerance, inclusiveness, and understanding"?

Someone suggested we quit using the word "whining" around here when referring to the nutwings. I'm sorry -- this is a textbook example of whining (in addition to bending the truth until it breaks).
Silleigh | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:30 pm | #

Y'all are killing me, I tell ya!

Cannot stop laughing.
bigvic | 12.04.04 - 2:30 pm | #

Christ. I'm taunting her hypocrisy, not her name.
Atrios | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:31 pm | #

Love how FiF projects. Comes here looking for hatred? Find lots of hatred in Bush, American, and xianity these days. Here, not so much. More just good friends hanging out on a Saturday. But keep on projecting, FiF. Helps to keep the shadow from becoming visible. Until it doesn't any more.
Hecate | 12.04.04 - 2:32 pm | #

poor michelle .. it's "hard work" being a relentless and broke-ass rethug ....

And just for the heck of it please stop calling me a heat-seeking liberal. I stopped calling you Imelda Marcos with a vocabulary many moons ago, and the least you could do is return the favor.
syntallic | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:33 pm | #

Let me explain to you about the un-Christyun evils of stem cell reserch. You see, everybody comes from sperm 'n eggs. That's why all the life-saving cures that could come from stem cell research are evil.

In conclusion, we don't want to offend people who think sperm 'n eggs are their friends. Therefore I submit to you that until stem cells stop comming from sperm 'n eggs, sperm 'n eggs should be left alone.

the end

-A.G.R.
AverageGodlyRepublican | 12.04.04 - 2:33 pm | #

"One more word about your period. When it finally comes, you may find it a good idea to use a "sanitary napkin"

When I was in 6th grade, growing up in rural Eastern Washington, I heard some girl say tampons can make you pregnant.
Seriously.

She probably teaches abstinence only sex ed in Texas now.
Stinky | 12.04.04 - 2:33 pm | #

About the Malkin/Megalodong thing. It seems pretty obvious that her oh-so-witty retort to our arguments amounted to .. nothing! I mean, she went through the motions of a rebuttal, but didn't actually rebut anything. In fact, it just confirmed what we were saying. 'I changed my name, but never got around to changing my name.' WTF?

So I have to ask, why did she bring it up at all? So she could quote the one person who said she was good looking? Because she likes reading her name in print?

And wasn't Megalodong one of those dinosaurs that fought Godzilla? Pretty appropriate.
jsg | 12.04.04 - 2:34 pm | #

Cold, grey and nasty here in Phoenix. Don't nobody move.

Naptime.
GWPDA | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:34 pm | #

righteous, atrios

i even sent the mistress of the dark a lovely e-mail bitch-slapping that virginian pilot for calling her "an asian ann coulter," at least she coulda sent me a xmas card or an autographed pic that I could photoshopped for posterity's sake
syntallic | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:35 pm | #

Speedy, I'm a big fan of your work and am praying for the day when Spermatazoan-Americans get all of the rights of citizenship.

And remember:
Every sperm is sacred
Every sperm is great
If you spill a single sperm
God will be irate!
Another Bruce | 12.04.04 - 2:35 pm | #

Imagine a close italic in there somewhere. /slinking away.
jsg | 12.04.04 - 2:35 pm | #

I can't understand the Dallas paper. I wrote last week because Maglalang-Malkin was quoted in an op ed on security. I pointed out that she is a racists who wrote a book in defense of interning Japanese Americans in WWII. The damn letters editor is a Japanese American. But they are not going to print my letter or I would have heard by now.

I would think that any Japanese American would find Mag the Hag very offensive, along with everyone else.
Tena | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:37 pm | #

more liddy dole like stuff for CSPAN: "Should your have a nocturnal emission, do not worry. A few easy preparations for this can be made in advance. Each night, before your mom tucks you in, make sure she supplies you with two bath towels, an automobile sponge, a mop, a pail of hospital-strength disinfectant, a five-gallon can of industrial cleanser, a hammer, a chisel, and a two-handed paint scraper."
syntallic | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:37 pm | #

And remember:
Every sperm is sacred
Every sperm is great
If you spill a single sperm
God will be irate!
Another Bruce

Fuck the Pope; it's The Pythons who are damn near infallible...
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 2:37 pm | #

I loved the part where Michelle says she changed her name because she loves her husband (implying that any woman interested in keeping her own identity doesn't really love her husband) but then says that she just never went through the hassle of changing it legally. So, she loves him enough to change her name for him but not enough to do it legally? She's saving that expression of her devotion for husband number two? And this is from the "personal responsibility" brigade? No time for those messy legal details.
Hecate | 12.04.04 - 2:38 pm | #

Hecate,

Bingo on the Malkin-ish non-name change; she b creepin for a nice AEI sugar daddy who can get her a regular shot on MSNBC or FOX news
syntallic | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:39 pm | #

"Bush, America and Christianity"...

okay- a President installed by his father's appointees to the Supreme Court who was well on his way to being a one-term wonder like his daddy when the US suffered a terrible attack. Instead of being held responsible for his inattention he parlayed fear and patriotism (so-called) into a war on a country that had no direct involvement with that attack, a war that hasn't panned out as he so confidently predicted, and probably has done more harm than good to the country in the long run. We won't even get into how his policies favor the few & connected over the many & un-connected.

America- a great country formed on the idea "all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.-----that to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed,---". Currently governed by a man and a party who don't actually believe a word of the above.

Christianity- a great religion that has given people a sense of security, purpose and has helped many many people through rought times in their lives. Not the only religion that ever was, though.

To recap-- great country, great religion, lousy President.

Troll, trying to build Bush up to equal a nation and a faith is a task you are not up for.
Nick Carraway | 12.04.04 - 2:41 pm | #

sytallic,

The sad thing is that she'll probably get one. However, I'd advise him to get it into the prenup that she has to change her name legally -- just to show that she loves him more than she loved No. 1 Husband.
Hecate | 12.04.04 - 2:41 pm | #

When I was in 6th grade, growing up in rural Eastern Washington, I heard some girl say tampons can make you pregnant. Seriously.

Not to be gross, but my fundie mom wouldn't let me use tampons, either. Jesus wouldn't approve. Besides, what if I liked how it felt?
TJ | 12.04.04 - 2:41 pm | #

Nick - well said.
Tena | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:42 pm | #

but then says that she just never went through the hassle of changing it legally

Hassle? IIRC it took maybe an hour at the most to change my wife's name. Make a bunch of copies of your marriage certificate and mail it to appropriate parties. Going down to DPS to change your drivers liscense is most of the time.
chris/tx | 12.04.04 - 2:42 pm | #

sorry for the tampon reference, but it is clearly a symbol of male dominion in the eyes of fundies who wish to control all aspects of the "evil, dirty, out of control temptations" found with a female body
syntallic | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:43 pm | #

The damn letters editor is a Japanese American.
Tena

But so is...DAMN! forgot his name. The rightwing Canadian nutjob blogger that ran for schoolboard on a zero tolerance platform and lost.
jsg | 12.04.04 - 2:44 pm | #

yeah, doing the name change thing when you get married is as easy as moving.
Atrios | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:45 pm | #

KIM DU TOIT?
chris/tx | 12.04.04 - 2:45 pm | #

But so is...DAMN! forgot his name. The rightwing Canadian nutjob blogger that ran for schoolboard on a zero tolerance platform and lost.

.... the yoshida dude with the liberal comfort women?
syntallic | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:45 pm | #

IIRC it took maybe an hour at the most to change my wife's name.

Well, it's sad. Especially from the Focus on the Family crowd, that Miss Michelle doesn't love her husband enough to stand in line at the DMV for him.
Hecate | 12.04.04 - 2:46 pm | #

I never realized until recently that the fundies have a problem with tampons.

They really do spend an inordinate amount of time worrying about all things having to do with people's sexual organs, don't they?
Tena | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:46 pm | #

Adam Yoshida, yes, thanks.
jsg | 12.04.04 - 2:47 pm | #

I still want to know what the big deal is about changing your name when you get married. I remember getting my name changed on my Social Security card and my driver's license, period. It's not nearly as tough (or expensive) as getting your birth name back after a divorce (that is, if you want to wait a few years before changing it back, say, when your kids are older).

M3's services are obviously in such great demand that she never found time over the past sweet 11 years to go do those two simple things -- although she loves her husbo more than any of those wack liberal women who keep their own names could POSSIBLY love theirs.
Silleigh | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:47 pm | #

Hey, I need a per capita map of tampon use in red versus blue states.
Brian Lamb | 12.04.04 - 2:47 pm | #

Well, it's sad. Especially from the Focus on the Family crowd, that Miss Michelle doesn't love her husband enough to stand in line at the DMV for him.
Hecate

probably married to some suburban pill popper hanging by a thread - kinda explains michelle-baby's obsession with rush oxycotonboy
syntallic | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:47 pm | #

Yoshida, not Yoshimi, IIRC. My brain cells aren't firing very well.
Tena | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:49 pm | #

jsg - Adam Yoshini. Good point. I suppose I am being racist in thinking that just because Mike Hashimoto is Japanese American he should be outraged about Malkin. Really I think everyone should be outraged about her.
Tena

the truth about miss michelle is this: if the attention and the cash came from the democratic side she'd be a total true believer ... she's part of the outrage society that exists only for attention ... call it jerry springer meets phyllis schlafly .. whatever ... in a dark room, she's pissing her pants wondering which asian community is about to perform a home invasion for selling them out
syntallic | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:51 pm | #

and for bringing together tidy little cluster of wingnutteresque psychoses-, a special award goes to pro- abstinence-only, anti-gay, anti-sex, Holocaust revisionist:Judith Reisman, the "champion" of the current anti-Kinsey crusade.

http://www.newyorker.com/talk/ co...6ta_talk_radosh

"for instance, she has written that the “recruitment techniques” of homosexuals rival those of the Marine Corps. The Kinsey paradigm, she holds, created the moral framework that makes such recruitment possible.."

hmmm...welll...miz reisman, I've been gay my whole life and I just can't recall any such recruitment. See, I volunteered for duty at a very early age...

I said "been gay"
jeebs | 12.04.04 - 2:52 pm | #

I never realized until recently that the fundies have a problem with tampons.

Doesn't some site like Betty Bowers have entries referring to tampons as "the Devil's finger" or something like that?

I think the idiotic reasoning behind it is that a tampon might pop your cherry, and your future husbo will never believe you weren't a virgin on your wedding night.

OH, it's Landover Baptist: Satan's Little Cotton Fingers.
Silleigh | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:52 pm | #

If we had some eggs, we could have some sperm n' eggs.

If we had some sperm.
PapaJijo | 12.04.04 - 2:53 pm | #

That's one weird 'rebuttal' from Ms M-M.

She 'permanently changed her professional name' while keeping her 'legal' name? WTF?

Oh, and the supposed 'expediency' of keeping her maiden name in the 'PC media culture'? Please, we're not as dumb as your loyal fan-base, Michelle. You're a wingnut poster-child, and wingnut poster-children with foreign-sounding names don't go that far.

Which prompts the thought: it's time to start prounouncing 'Coulter' as 'cool-tay', faux-français.
pseudonymous in nc | 12.04.04 - 2:54 pm | #

Christ. I'm taunting her hypocrisy, not her name.
Atrios

Quoth la Maglalang/Malkin: "Despite the puerile ridiculing by people like Atrios's readers, I love the name "Maglalang." It is a beautiful, melodic, Filipino family name."

Just not belovbed or 'beautiful' enough to use it in her racist diatribes? Go figger...
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 2:54 pm | #

I think the real fundie problem w/ tampons is that the fundies are worried that using a tampon might tear the hymen. Thus, no sure way to tell that a bride is, in fact, a virgin. Thus, a lack of certainty as to paternity -- a fear upon which quite a few of the world's messes can be blamed.
Hecate

A friend of mine told me her fundie mother wouldn't let her ride a bike with the banana shaped seat as a small child for the same reason. Don't ask me what's up with that because I don't know.
Incognito | 12.04.04 - 2:54 pm | #

recent post by adam yoshida, stormtrooper in training: "Domesticated animals are nice amusements and companions: but they’re not suited to survive without outside protection. If my kind-hearted cat were to find himself alone in the dark against some vicious wild animal he’d have exactly two choices: run or die and, in any case, there’s no certainty that the former would work. In the wild, ultimately, you have two choices: kill, or be killed. The only animals who survive in the wild without the capacity for combat are those which are adept at running and hiding.

The same, I think, is true among the peoples of the Earth. There’s a tidal wave coming: a demographic tidal wave in which the stronger people, those without as much “culture”, “refinement” and “sophistication” as we of the West have threaten to swamp and drown us. A few far-sighted people can see it come. A brave few have tried to warn of it, despite the near certainty that such courageous individuals will be libellously derided as racists and bigots."

kinda reads like the preamble to "mein kampf" or in this case -- "a clueless citizen's approach to biology"
syntallic | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:54 pm | #

I hate perverts who pervert Christianity to promote their own backwards-ass, reactionary prejudices like Mullahs Falwell, Dobson, Robertson, and Phelps. That's not the same as "hating" Christianity.

Freedom Isn't Free. Yeah, the George Bush version of "freedom" is costing us a bloated deficit, plunging dollar, and deteriotion in: national security, education, defense, etc. I want my money back on that version.
Eyes of Jellied Fire | 12.04.04 - 2:54 pm | #

Some Dems are tired of conspiracy theories??
No one is claiming fraud as yet - but for the life of me, I cannot understand why both Dems and Repugs would not like to see this Election 2004 cleaned up - Even if Bush won fair and square, it is not apparent at this point.
For God's sake - let's clean up the problems, and count the goddam votes.
Dorothy M. Ligon | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:55 pm | #

I would think that any Japanese American would find Mag the Hag very offensive, along with everyone else.
Tena

It amazes me that Maglalang can be from Seattle and not have once taken a walk through the International District (paying a special visit to the Panama Hotel), visited a local museum, or read the barrage of articles in the Seattle papers back in the 1980's about Japanese-Americans getting huge settlements because their property was confiscated in the 1940's - there are so many reminders of internment and the pain it caused to families both during and after the war.

Maglalang is just so inexcusably ignorant. And offensive. And just a cruel bitch.
Stinky | 12.04.04 - 2:55 pm | #

Silleigh--what's really scary is that "Mrs. Crockett" sounds just like my Mom and all her wacko friends did. And yes, I agree with you and Hecate--it definitely all comes back to the virginity test.
TJ | 12.04.04 - 2:56 pm | #

She should go one step further in taking her husband's name and become Ofmike. It would put her in the vanguard of the Glorious Christian Cultural Revolution.
Gen. JC Christian, patriot | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:56 pm | #

Hey, I found a connection between two of today's idiots:
Even Elizabeth Dole didn't escape Malkin's radar. In “Is Bush a Liddy Dole Republican?” (Mar. 17, 2000) Malkin snipes, “She's baaaack. Elizabeth Dole has been buffed, polished, and pulled off the Republican trophy shelf by Texas Gov. George W. Bush in a lame attempt to attract liberal women voters,”. Malkin even seemed to hint at a bit of sexual chemistry between Dole and Bush. “She cooed that Bush was ‘my kind of conservative.’” She sexualizes Dole with the gratuitous observation: “The woman nicknamed ‘Sugar Lips’ has been wading inside the Beltway for decades, like a giddy queen bee in a bottomless pot of taxpayer-subsidized honey.”
http://goldsea.com/Personalities...kin/ malkin.html
Now if I can find a reference to them and a ferret I may buy myself a bottle of single malt scotch!
bebe rebozo | 12.04.04 - 2:56 pm | #

"Despite the puerile ridiculing by people like Atrios's readers, I love the name "Maglalang." It is a beautiful, melodic, Filipino family name."

Just not belovbed or 'beautiful' enough to use it in her racist diatribes? Go figger...

It is a beautiful name - and a shame she's too embarassed of her heritage to use it.
Stinky | 12.04.04 - 2:57 pm | #

Which prompts the thought: it's time to start prounouncing 'Coulter' as 'cool-tay', faux-français.
pseudonymous in nc

"Couter" is a very rural country word for a vagina.

Ann Couter he he
Incognito | 12.04.04 - 2:58 pm | #

boffo work bebe ... michelle is never in short supply of anglo-envy ... guess she wanted to go down on Dubya before Liddy sank her meat hooks in
syntallic | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:59 pm | #

Liberals are truly sublime
For Apocalypse they truly do pine
While awaiting world's end,
Perhaps we could send,
A little cheese to go with that whine?
Lime Ickey | 12.04.04 - 2:59 pm | #

Silleigh - I figured the tampon issue was one of virginity, but for some reason it just never occurred to me that they'd be so exercised over it.
Tena | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:00 pm | #

This is just about too much: Meet Judith Reisman--"A sixty-nine-year-old independent researcher with a Ph.D. in communications and a former songwriter for Captain Kangaroo, Reisman is the president of the Institute for Media Education and the lead author of “Kinsey, Sex and Fraud” and “Kinsey: Crimes and Consequences.” In one article, Reisman describes Kinsey as “a scientific and moral fraud, a certifiable sexual psychopath as well as a sadomasochistic pornography addict and a sexually harassing bully.” Though largely unknown outside social-conservative circles, Reisman has been influential within them. She has served as a consultant to the Departments of Education and Health and Human Services and was given seven hundred and thirty-four thousand dollars by Ronald Reagan’s Justice Department to study pornography.

Something for Michelle Maglamalkin to aspire to???
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 3:00 pm | #

Honest to jebuz, once humans figured out that males play a role in reproduction, the terror that a man might raise a child not his own led to all sorts of cultural stupidity, of which, forcing women to change their names is only the smallest most miniscule part. You'd think that now, with DNA testing, we could just stop a lot of the stupidity, but noooooo.
Hecate | 12.04.04 - 3:00 pm | #

ha incognito

i think malkin ... translated roughly in the classic language, latin .. means douchebag
syntallic | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:01 pm | #

There's something a bit disturbing about Brother Yoshida writing "Domesticated animals are nice amusements." I hope that he is not urging us to turn Fido into a "comfort dog."
Gen. JC Christian, patriot

actually this frees adam the terrible from the guilt of lighting the neighborhood pets on fire with lighter fluid and his gas drill starter .. true sign of a raging sociopath
syntallic | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:02 pm | #

given seven hundred and thirty-four thousand dollars by Ronald Reagan’s Justice Department to study pornography.

What a rip off. I know people who'd gladly do exhaustive studies of pornography for free.
Hecate | 12.04.04 - 3:03 pm | #

Laterz all
Incognito | 12.04.04 - 3:03 pm | #

For $734,000, I know LOTS of folks who would study pornography. Hell, Mr. TJ would do it for $734.
TJ | 12.04.04 - 3:03 pm | #

Konopelli, Reisman also claims Kinsey died from a condition caused by excessive matsturbation. I'm not kidding. I wrote about it awhile back. I'll see if I can find it.
patriotboy | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:04 pm | #

"...a schpritz of feminine deodorant, Glade, or liquid benzene should make your strolls upwind of kennels and dog shows free from any possible danger of embarrassment."

Someone quoted from "Nancy Reagan's Dating Do's and Don'ts" which was one of Doug Kenney's classic pieces for the old National Lampoon magazine. One of my formative reads.
parsec | 12.04.04 - 3:04 pm | #

given seven hundred and thirty-four thousand dollars by Ronald Reagan’s Justice Department to study pornography.

was that the Meese commission? now there was mutant degenerate if there ever was one to beat to death

i had the image in my mind of Ed Meese laying out the photos for Ronnie Raygun and Dubya's dad, but they settled on a gang bang with Fawn Hall
syntallic | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:04 pm | #

Konopelli, Reisman also claims Kinsey died from a condition caused by excessive matsturbation

At least he went with a smile on his face.
Hecate | 12.04.04 - 3:05 pm | #

Ha that's funny, I was just talking about cooters this morning.

holiest of holies.

.
dieselcreek | 12.04.04 - 3:05 pm | #

Someone quoted from "Nancy Reagan's Dating Do's and Don'ts" which was one of Doug Kenney's classic pieces for the old National Lampoon magazine. One of my formative reads.
parsec

ab-so-fucking-lutely .... one of the funniest rants ever created ... i was raised on NL and monty python .. have them committed to memory ... including the "every sperm is sacred" lyrics quoted beautifully above
syntallic | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:06 pm | #

Or, come to think of it, for free.
TJ | 12.04.04 - 3:06 pm | #

Here's the post. She claimed he died from "years of sadistic, orgiastic 'self-abuse'."
patriotboy | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:07 pm | #

I know people who'd gladly do exhaustive studies of pornography for free.

I do, almost daily, in tastefully tiny, 30-45 second increments...
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 3:08 pm | #

haaaaaaa patriotdude .. love the high forehead on the freak and the sock puppet reference
syntallic | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:08 pm | #

Maglalang is just so inexcusably ignorant. And offensive. And just a cruel bitch.
Stinky | Email

=============

BINGO!
mena | 12.04.04 - 3:09 pm | #

I know where you can do an extensive study on pornography for $170/year. It is called the Ecstasy Channel and is available on satellite.
chris/tx | 12.04.04 - 3:09 pm | #

It just occurred to me:

Michelle's a (wait for it)...

Maglalamaniac...
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 3:10 pm | #

chris/tx ... i wonder what the subscriber rates are in the red states ... enquiring minds want to know
syntallic | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:10 pm | #

Kerry left $14 million unspent?
peterboy | 12.04.04 - 3:10 pm | #

Just curious, but does Reisman think women can also die from orgiastic self-abuse? Not that I'm worried, mind you...
TJ | 12.04.04 - 3:11 pm | #

I figured the tampon issue was one of virginity, but for some reason it just never occurred to me that they'd be so exercised over it.

Tena, go figger. I was raised in Virginia and... jeez. They occasionally get freaky over girls riding HORSES too, for the same reason.

Ahh, memories. I remember an aunt telling us when we were teens that we should NEVER shave the hair above our knees -- that our "future husband won't appreciate it." One cousin took this to heart all her life, apparently -- you'd see her at family gatherings, wearing shorts, and there was a clear line beginning at the top of her knees covered with really obvious, thick dark leghair.
Silleigh | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:11 pm | #

Kerry left $14 million unspent?
peterboy

hope you don't think he's finished -- no one save 14M unless they got big plans to test the waters again
syntallic | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:11 pm | #

Just curious, but does Reisman think women can also die from orgiastic self-abuse? Not that I'm worried, mind you...
TJ /i>

TJ if i'd been drinking anything, i'd have shorted out the board...
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 3:12 pm | #

My wife just left to go fight the Crusades (Xmas shopping at the Galleria).

Ye gods, man!

I don't go near that place on December 26th! Much less any other time of year.

She's a better [person] than I, Gunga Din.
Robert M. Jeffers | 12.04.04 - 3:12 pm | #

Reisman ... believes that Kinsey died not from heart failure but from what she calls “brutal, repetitive self-abuse.”

It's in the current New Yorker Talk of the Town.
Philboid Studge | 12.04.04 - 3:12 pm | #

Silleigh .... oooh lordy there .. just got a really bad picture in my head

bad .. bad ... bad picture ... no go away before somebody places the intrusion at braidmycoochie.com
syntallic | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:13 pm | #

Reisman ... believes that Kinsey died not from heart failure but from what she calls “brutal, repetitive self-abuse.”

i could think of 40 worse ways to go
syntallic | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:14 pm | #

yea. but I wanted a win this time.
peterboy | 12.04.04 - 3:14 pm | #

"Brutal, repetitive Patting his Robertson," eh, Patriotboy?
Philboid Studge | 12.04.04 - 3:14 pm | #

Sorry to interrupt (?). Just came across this, and I'm thinking of starting a blog just so I can put this up beneath the blog name, so I can see it everyday.

"I have only ever made one prayer to God, a very short one: 'Oh Lord, make my enemies ridiculous.' And God granted it."

--Voltaire
Robert M. Jeffers | 12.04.04 - 3:15 pm | #

love the name "Maglalang." It is a beautiful, melodic, Filipino family name."

So Michelle, imagine a Filipino member of Al Qaeda launching a devestating attack on a U.S. city. Question, will you go to visit other beautiful Filipino families in the internment camps?
Another Bruce | 12.04.04 - 3:15 pm | #

Robert M Jeffers - that is perfect. Please do it. We need your voice.
Tena | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:15 pm | #

Just curious, but does Reisman think women can also die from orgiastic self-abuse? Not that I'm worried, mind you...

I don't think so. According to her, Kinsey died from a complication relating to a testicular infection. That's the basis of her claim that he beat himelf to death.
patriotboy | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:16 pm | #

I have an utterly sweet, happy, 65-lb tawny, pink-nosed pit bull trying to scale my lap...makes typing a challenging act...
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 3:16 pm | #

syntallic - Big dish satellites do not differentiate between red/blue states (and no, I don't live in a trailer). Last subscription bill was I think $170-180/year for 24/7/365. Actually I got it for my wife.
chris/tx

congrats on the wife .. sounds like a trooper, but somebody has the demographics on this based on where they send the bill
syntallic | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:17 pm | #

I'm thinking of starting a blog...

GO, RMJ, do it! GO! GO! Go and blog some more!!!

* * *
Maglalamaniac...

Konopelli, that's priceless.
Silleigh | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:18 pm | #

i could think of 40 worse ways to go
syntallic

There must be 40 ways to spank your munkey...
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 3:18 pm | #

some thoughts re "cooters", excerpted from the July 26 St. Petersburg Times article abou the Florida town of Inverness' first annual Cooter Festival
http://www.sptimes.com/2004/07/ 2...ame_survi.shtml
-----

coo*ter (noun): Etymology: of African origin; akin to Bambara and Malinke kuta turtle chiefly South & Midland. Any of several turtles or tortoises of the southern and eastern United States; especially the slider turtle (Pseudemys concinna) and certain closely related forms.

- Merriam Webster Unabridged Dictionary

Cooter; coota n. (1650s-1990s) originally from the West African word kuta; or possibly from nkuda (Kongo), meaning a "box turtle," or a hard-backer turtle; terrapin. West African word kuts: a box turtle.

- From Juba to Jive, a Dictionary of African-American Slang

Connie C. Eble, a University of North Carolina professor, is an authority on college slang who has written the book Slang and Sociability. She collects new words or word uses from her students and passes them on to respected modern-day lexicographers for documentation and interpretation.

When asked about the origins of cooter's double nature, Eble discovered she may have been the first to document its seedy deviation in 1986, according to the Random House Historical Dictionary of American Slang. It was first documented in a sentence to describe a turtle in 1832.

But she did not know how it got its vulgar meaning. It may have come from its similarity to the word "cootie," which can describe lice, an old cantankerous person or a woman's genitals, she said.

"Coozie," according to dictionaries, was a similar vulgar reference in the 1920s. But one dictionary may have a definitive explanation for how a word for such a mundane animal became so crass. Cassell's Dictionary of Slang, a primarily British book, describes cooter as "United States dialect, a freshwater turtle but U.S. campus slang: a vagina," Eble said.

She further found that the dictionary defines the snapping turtle as the vagina - a use that goes far back.

"What probably happened is that someone knew that snapping turtle means the vagina and substituted the regional word of cooter for snapping turtle for vagina," Eble said. "That's my guess."

jeebs | 12.04.04 - 3:18 pm | #

So, basically, Michelle is going to sic her brother on us? Mature! And she sure does pay a lot of property taxes for a glass house...

LOL at Mag the Hag, though - a much better moniker than whatever name she's chosen for herself.

And speaking as someone who recently underwent a name change, it takes a day, maybe two (I also had to change my address at the same time). The only thing I couldn't change was my college e-mail, since they had too many csmiths already. And I'm sure if I, a lowly liberal Canadian student, can do it, so can Mag the Hag. (God that's fun to type!!)
Charlotte Smith (nee Beavers) | 12.04.04 - 3:20 pm | #

Honest to jebuz, once humans figured out that males play a role in reproduction, the terror that a man might raise a child not his own led to all sorts of cultural stupidity

Well, they don't call beatin' someone like a redheaded stepchild for nuthin'
Carpbasman | 12.04.04 - 3:20 pm | #

Freedom Isn't Free

Wingers tend to be the Kings of unintentional irony.
Another Bruce | 12.04.04 - 3:20 pm | #

Hey Lime Ickey, you poetry-school dropout, I left you another reply at the end of the last thread.
fourmorewars | 12.04.04 - 3:21 pm | #

Did I mention I hate fuckin' middle class conservatives who are too stupid to realize all the ways they hypocritically use the government in their day to day lives? Did I mention how I hate how they have abandoned the party that fucking created the middle class? Have I mentioned how I hate how they have not learned the lessons of history and how I know they'll be sorry when the Fucks in control now and others like them destroy the New Deal and other advances like it?

GDoyle
GDoyle | 12.04.04 - 3:21 pm | #

RMJ. that is a wonderful quote.
mena | 12.04.04 - 3:22 pm | #

Charlotte Smith (nee Beavers)

that's what the last wife's "nee" was (absent the plural)...Franch Canadian/Cajun, probably???
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 3:22 pm | #

now THIS is priceless:

Christian Debt Removers - Let us help you remove your debt

Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another. Romans 13:8 -- according to the site
syntallic | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:22 pm | #

Funny thing happened yesterday..

Listened to a bit of Rush Lumbo and he had a guest host (can't remember his name).

But anyways, he went on and on about how the ACLU is trying to turn the USA into Communist Russia and one of examples he used was, no lie, the ACLU's stance on flag burning (the ACLU wants to protect that right).

I don't recall Communist Russia ever allowing their flag to be burnt. I don't recall a lot pictures from Russia where people freely burnt their flags. Isn't the freedom to burn whatever the fuck you want key to what makes America "America"?
Jesse | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:24 pm | #

Nee is a French term, IIRC - it's the way I've always seen it used. I always forget the accents, tho
Charlotte Smith (nee Beavers) | 12.04.04 - 3:25 pm | #

but somebody has the demographics on this based on where they send the bill

syntallic - Actually they only take credit cards for privacy reasons.

RMJ - I was asked if I would be joining the ladies today for lunch and shopping at the Galleria (have been there maybe three times in last fifteen years). I, er, uh, politely declined choosing to pick up dog poop in the backyard instead.
chris/tx | 12.04.04 - 3:25 pm | #

You all hate her so.
Freedom Isn't Free
What I hate is what folks like you are doing to my country. I would happily kick the living shit outta you, but it would not slake my loathing, nor diinish my rage. Beware, shitstick. It may not be me, but one of us is gonna fuck you up one day, soon...flinch when you hear a noise in the dark, grab your balls, and pray...
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 3:25 pm | #

As I mentioned in another thread - In my hygiene class (early sixties) we were given a booklet (just for girls)which claimed that one of the reasons you shouldn't masturbate was because your doctor would be able to tell, just by looking. Christ, I was in my twenties before I figured out what a load of crap that was. Just think of all the fun I missed.

These people just can't get over the fact that women enjoy sex and should be allowed the same leeway as guys. And to be arguing tampons now is completely beyond the pale. Think of it, every goddamn innovation that served to make women a bit more independent is under attack. Abortion, birth control, fucking tampons. What's next? Choice of a husband?
QuiltLady in NY | 12.04.04 - 3:26 pm | #

I googled red states and porn and, after wading through some, er, interesting sites, found this statistic from the NYT (can't access the original article):
Top three states for readership of Playboy magazine? Iowa, Wyoming, North Dakota.
Haven't found anything on videos or satellite viewership yet.
TJ | 12.04.04 - 3:26 pm | #

I meant the "Beavers" part, ackshully...
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 3:27 pm | #

Charlotte,

We don't need your kind comin' 'round here insulting Our Lord and Savior's nglish language with your fancy commie French words.
Gen JC Christian, patriot | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:28 pm | #

TJ.
playboy is porn? I saw that in the original article, which was about the dichotomy of 'moral values' and viewer/readership of things such as Playbout and Desperate Housewives. the show was popular in Red states, too.
peterboy | 12.04.04 - 3:29 pm | #

Jeebs, interesting. Gentleman-friend and I were laughing over the "cooter" thing last night over the phone (he'd seen the rerun of Thursday night's TDS). I hit online dictionaries and finally googled "cooter," and nothing remotely pornish showed up in pages and pages of hits. The ONE relevant thing that turned up was a Howard Troxler column in the St. Pete Times, written when Inverness decided to cancel the Cooter Festival because of the flap, and then changed its mind.

[City Manager] DiGiovanni warned against a "witch-hunt" mentality that would lead us to forbidding our children to watch reruns of Leave It to Beaver...
Silleigh | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:29 pm | #

Robert M. Jeffers,

You should definitely start a blog! You'd be fantastic. Course, it would double the amount of time every day that I spend on blogs, but heck, there's always all that time I waste sleeping every day!
Hecate | 12.04.04 - 3:29 pm | #

Think of it, every goddamn innovation that served to make women a bit more independent is under attack.

Exactly. It's really scary. Margaret Atwood was a prophet. Apparently it's also not kosher to keep your maiden name when you get married. 'Cuz then you're not giving your "knight" the admiration he needs.
TJ | 12.04.04 - 3:30 pm | #

Ah, I see - the story goes, from my dad's family at least, that Beavers is in fact a bastardized spelling of Beevers, supposedly a Welsh name. Can't speak for all the other Beaverses out there, mind you. All I know for sure is that 23 years of dirty jokes has made me a stronger person
Charlotte Smith (nee Beavers) | 12.04.04 - 3:31 pm | #

What's next? Choice of a husband

I'm thinking they'll take away shoes and then start in on female circumcision before they get to choice of husband.
Hecate | 12.04.04 - 3:31 pm | #

Lime Ickey | Email | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 2:59 pm | #

ZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzz...
(snrk!)
Projection thy name is repub
Calling us Beezelbub
Constantly flailing
For our failings
While you drink from the kool-aid tub
jrm78 | 12.04.04 - 3:32 pm | #

Thanks for the link, Philboid Studge, that was fascinating--creepy but fascinating.
Sweet Sue | 12.04.04 - 3:32 pm | #

Top three states for readership of Playboy magazine? Iowa, Wyoming, North Dakota.
TJ - Well, sheep do get to be annoyingly all the same.
Spinoza | 12.04.04 - 3:32 pm | #

Freedom Isn't Free,

Can you fully explain what morals I don't have?

I'm part of that big bad band of Liberals that you love to paint with one stroke of a brush.
Jesse | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:32 pm | #

But anyways, he went on and on about how the ACLU is trying to turn the USA into Communist Russia and one of examples he used was, no lie, the ACLU's stance on flag burning (the ACLU wants to protect that right).

Side point, but hmm -- didn't the ACLU go to court to help OxyRush re. his medical records flap?
Silleigh | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:34 pm | #

Silleigh,

Yeah, they did. I hope someday that Rush gags on his hypocrisy.
Jesse | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:36 pm | #

Dorothy M Ligon - IMO, regular people - Dems and Repugs, would like to have the election system in this country cleaned up.
Most of the people I have talked to about our election system express the same perception - that it is clumsy, if not broken, and needs to be revised.

I think, separate from the issue of fraud committed by Repugs, most people agree with you. I really think it should be a huge issue and I wish some someone would make it one.
Tena | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:37 pm | #

Starting Monday on ABC "news" with Peckerhead Aboot Jennings.
America Red America Blue.
Has anyone got any rat poison?
Chauncy Gardner | 12.04.04 - 3:37 pm | #

Margaret Atwood spoke last week in Santa Fe. She's fuckin brilliant, folks, totally brilliant. If you haven't already, everyone should read "The Handmaid's Tale." Plus she has a new book out: Oryx and Crake (2003)...MUST READ
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 3:38 pm | #

Being somebody singled out for special praise by Little LuLu, I have prepared a special little something.

And yes, key-riest, Atrios was singling her out for her hypocrisy, as am I (ok, I added the special touch of essentially calling her an ass) -- Naturally Ms. Maglalang whines and implies that its all about her race.

No, it's about you being a hypocritical fool you dope. And you've got a lot of nerve playing that card considering what you do 24/7.
Attaturk | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:39 pm | #

Each night, before your mom tucks you in, make sure she supplies you with two bath towels, an automobile sponge, a mop, a pail of hospital-strength disinfectant, a five-gallon can of industrial cleanser, a hammer, a chisel, and a two-handed paint scraper."
syntallic

Stop it stop it stop it. Between this and what Konopelli just typed, I'm laughing so hard I'm starting to get stomach muscles.
bigvic | 12.04.04 - 3:40 pm | #

Tena; I sorta have this fantasy that the DNC is going to revive itself and take care of some of these matters. I'd like to see the Dems pull together all the studies on the matter and start coming up with recomendations for change.
gonzo | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:40 pm | #

I'll never forget when the Homosexuality Recruiting Officer stopped bu our house. It was 1954. He suavely suggested that I take in a matinee of Kismet at the Roxy. So I did and halfway through Dolores Gray's "Not Since Nineveh" number I TURNED GAY !!!!!
David Ehrenstein | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:40 pm | #

RMJ - I was asked if I would be joining the ladies today for lunch and shopping at the Galleria (have been there maybe three times in last fifteen years). I, er, uh, politely declined choosing to pick up dog poop in the backyard instead.

Even with bare hands, you'd be getting off easy....
Robert M. Jeffers | 12.04.04 - 3:41 pm | #

>Sure nuff, outside was the traveling Judge Moore Ten Commandments.<

Right behind that will be Judge Roy Bean with his portable electric chair for sinners like you who ran away from Walmart.
Chauncy Gardner | 12.04.04 - 3:42 pm | #

Konopelli - Megalamaniac -

Ow ow ow - that is so good it hurts.
Tena | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:42 pm | #

Yeah, they did. I hope someday that Rush gags on his hypocrisy.

Ahh.

David: He's passed on.
Derek: he died. uh...he choked on..the ac- the official explanation was he choked on vomit.
Nigel: It was actually, was actually someone else's vomit. It's not....
David: It's ugly.
Nigel: You know. There's no real....
Derek: You know they can't prove whose vomit it was...they don't have the facilities at Scotland Yard....
David: You can't print, there's no way to print a spectra-photograph
Nigel: You can't really dust for vomit.
Silleigh | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:43 pm | #

Margaret Atwood spoke last week in Santa Fe. She's fuckin brilliant, folks, totally brilliant. If you haven't already, everyone should read "The Handmaid's Tale."

It's America's new owner's manual.
patriotboy | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:43 pm | #

Attaturk-nice picture of the wingnut's Tokyo Rose. Do you think she is aware of her husband's cheating on her?
Spinoza | 12.04.04 - 3:44 pm | #

Dog shit in winter is easier to "handle" (one might say) cuz it's frozen solid...at least it is here...
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 3:45 pm | #

Tena - What FL has proposed (but will never pass) is to basically expand early voting. Otherwords, make voting a 2-3 week process and eliminate much of the precints in favor of super voting centers. All registered voters would be in a central database that could be checked at these voting centers.

IMO, a great idea.
chris/tx | 12.04.04 - 3:45 pm | #

I love it when people castigate what they don't understand as unfounded conspiracies. I followed Watergate from Day One when it was officially "a third rate burglary" until the day Ford pardoned criminal Richard Nixon to prevent him from being charged with conspiracy.

By the way, John Dean, Nixon's White House counsel during the Watergate coverup, says what Bush has been doing is worse than Watergate.
George Johnston | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:45 pm | #

31 May 2004
In an interview with Time magazine, Rush Limbaugh declares himself a longtime fan of the ACLU after they filed an amicus brief on his behalf in his prescription drug case: "In a situation like this, I think it's safe to say I welcome its support, and I don't find it hypocritical at all, because I am not anti-ACLU. If the ACLU wants to go after, say, nativity scenes or this sort of thing, I may take issue, but there are other areas where I've supported things it has done."

BWA HAHAHAHA! Watch freepers' heads explode!
Jesse | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:45 pm | #

agave,

AHHEEEIII! I've boycotted Walmart for years, but that 10 commandments display is either the weirdest thing yet or managemet's way to keep un-godly shoppers from stealing their sweatshop junk.
bigvic | 12.04.04 - 3:46 pm | #

Ho ho ho, the liberals can't take the truth, that their philopsopy is bankrupt, their lack of morals drives decent peiople away, that Bush is Back and so is all that is GOOD abot America. You all hate her so.
Freedom Isn't Free

You're right, I just don't come close to sharing your "moral values".

The reason I am a Democrat is because I need a few more divorces and at least a substance abuse problem and/or some weird sex scandal involving hookers, phone sex, or naked pics on the Internet. An out-of-wedlock child would be ideal. I also need to stop talking to my family, too.

And then when I get caught and people think I'm a hypocritical shit bag, I can find Christ and then everyone will think it's all cool, right?

It's only after that point I'll feel like a real conservative. I hope you can understand.

Love,
Stinky
Stinky | 12.04.04 - 3:46 pm | #

Second, I love how those abstinence-only freaks who told our kids that touching each other's genitals leads to pregnancy and other lies defended themselves.

The funny part is they are too stupid to realize they are shooting themselves in the foot. By telling lies like that which are trivial for the people involved to learn are lies, they immediately call everything else they say, however true it might be, into question.

St. Augustine had that part right a bunch of centuries ago when he warned that trying to claim that everything in the Bible had to be the absolute truth, when ordinary people through their own experience and observation knew that it couldn't be, would cause them to then doubt the really important parts (love they neighbour, forgiveness, all that other commendable stuff). He was warning that demanding strict adherence to the text would risk people going on to ignore the message.

Same thing here. The goal of reducing teenage pregnancy is a commendable one, one that I fully support. Hell, I even support programs that teach abstinence as the safest way of eliminating the risk of pregnancy and STD transmission. Lying about it isn't the way to do it.
Keith | 12.04.04 - 3:47 pm | #

Ah, another day of wingnut whining and moaning..."they don't like us, boo-hoo"..."they hate my president, the worst one in American history, waaah"...."they hate America, just because we're trying to turn it into a nice, safe, white, Fascist, repressive, ignorant 3rd-world backwater"..."we won, even if it meant cheating, lying, stealing votes, fucking with code, and scaring the shit out of old folks and black folks who stood in line for hours"..."they hate Christianity, Jesus was against blacks, jews, kindness, liberalism, what's the matter with them?" FiF and his ilk wouldn't know freedon if they were free. And they wouldn't like it, either, because true freedom belongs to everyone, not just the ass-kissers and lazy shits who watch Faux news. If it weren't for rush and sean, they'd have nothing to post. They're in for a big surprise.
Ronjazz | 12.04.04 - 3:47 pm | #

gonzo - You and me both, baby. I have that same dream. It really isn't' a partisan thing, though of course we've been the victims of this fucked up system possibly 3 times now.

This last election was particularly egregious, AFAIC. I couldn't believe how fast the media jumped in to call the election in the various states that "mattered." And that's something else that bothers me - now it's just blatantly down to the EC votes, so people all over the country basically have their votes ignored. Both parties campaigned directly to the EC and the media reported the election strictly on that basis.

It just bugs the shit out of me. I want paper ballots and all ballots counted before the media starts declaring a winner.
Tena | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:49 pm | #

My girlfreind aka Melissa was in WalMart yesterday. Over the public address system she heard that the Ten Commandments were outside, go see them, you won't be disappointed! It freaked her out and she left imediately. Sure nuff, outside was the traveling Judge Moore Ten Commandments.
I think that put an end to our increasingly rare visits to Wally Weird.
agave

Why the hell is Wal-Mart open on Sunday then? Aren't they supposed to keep holy the Sabbath?

Also, I think that commandment about not committing adultery would really alienate a substanital portion of their customers who have slept with at least half the trailer park.
Stinky | 12.04.04 - 3:49 pm | #

Keith,

I call them the Santa Claus Sex Laws.

You don't know the truth until you're older.
Jesse | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:50 pm | #

I wish I'd never read The Handmaid's Tale. I'd be a happier woman for a few more months.
Hecate | 12.04.04 - 3:50 pm | #

There is nothing but hatred here. Liberals are supposed to be sooooooo open minded, about gays and stuff, but their minds are shut tight when they disagree what hateful hipocrits you are.
Freedom Isn't Free | 12.04.04 - 3:53 pm | #

"Erections lasting over four hours,
while rare, require immediate medical
attention."

Thinking about having sex with
Malkin could probably do the trick.
Apollo C. Vermouth | 12.04.04 - 3:53 pm | #

Freedom, you're right. I need a more open mind. I'm opening the champagne right now.
Sue | 12.04.04 - 3:54 pm | #

My rude question for the day. Why does Rumsfeld's former company make tens of millions of dollars every time he targets a hospital or wastewater treatment plant in Iraq?
George Johnston | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:54 pm | #

Freedom, you're right. I need a more open mind. I'm opening the champagne right now.
Sue | 12.04.04 - 3:54 pm | #

And by the way, give our troops and our persident some respect, dammit. They are figting to preserve your freedom even though you don't deserve it, you morons.
Freedom Isn't Free | 12.04.04 - 3:54 pm | #

Keith - Lying about anything isn't the way to do it. You're right - and this is a huge mistake that the government and other institutions make all the time.

They have lied about marijuana forever, too, and people know it's lies. When the government or whoever talks about other illegal drugs, kids don't believe them, as a result. "They said heroin is addictive, but they say that about pot. It's a lie, so it must not be true about heroin."

That's probably an exaggeration. But that is what happens when people, especially young people, are lied to. It's really important for adults to be honest with young people, or the adults are going to be dismissed out of hand. With often tragic results.
Tena | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:54 pm | #

Rumsfeld is a great American. You liberal fags are not fit to carry his jock strap. He is what real men should be.
Freedom Isn't Free | 12.04.04 - 3:55 pm | #

I just tuned in. Freedom Isn't Free accuses us of Bush-hatred. What do you call Clinton-hatred, my friend?
millerdunwoody | 12.04.04 - 3:55 pm | #

Ah yes.
Rummy staying on.
Now that torture's legal, what's next?
Summary executions?
Oh. Wait.....
gonzo | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:55 pm | #

In re: The Handmaid's Tale

It was required reading in my Intro to Education classes, both at LSU and later at OKIE U. It was ALWAYS met by howls of protest, and frequent refusals--until they saw the mid-term...heheheh...
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 3:55 pm | #

Freedom Isn't Free-How did you enjoy Liddy Dole sitting on your face last night? Sore tongue?
bebe rebozo | 12.04.04 - 3:55 pm | #

Sue-

A good champagne stored properly can keep for decades.

The shelf life of champagne at Chez Snugglebunny, however, is only about 20 minutes.
Snugglebunny | 12.04.04 - 3:55 pm | #

Liberals are supposed to be sooooooo open minded, about gays and stuff, but their minds are shut tight when they disagree what hateful hipocrits you are.

Oooh, better hope your hero Maglalamaniac doesn't catch how badly you butchered "hypocrites"!
Silleigh | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:55 pm | #

Because at least Bush has done lots of things worthy of our scorn. And Clinton?
millerdunwoody | 12.04.04 - 3:56 pm | #

Dang, Attaturk.

Now I gotta douche my laptop again. That pic is a real LuLu.
bigvic | 12.04.04 - 3:56 pm | #

Sorry, bud, Iraq was never a threat to my freedom.

But Michelle Malkin is. Along with the rest of the fascist intelligentsia.
Tena | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:56 pm | #

My second question is will Rumsfeld ever stop targeting hospitals and water treatment plants as long as his former company makes $40 or $50 million dollars for each of these attacks which is a war crime?
George Johnston | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 3:56 pm | #

You liberal fags are not fit to carry his jock strap. He is what real men should be.
Freedom Isn't Free

It's not Rumsfailed's jock you should be hyping here, friend. It's Cheney's. I doubt a whole crew of freepers like you could carry Dick's dicksack...
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 3:57 pm | #

Have any of my liberal compatriots spent time at right-wing blogs? What's it like?
millerdunwoody | 12.04.04 - 3:57 pm | #

Surely, FiF is a parody? It's sad that I can no longer tell the difference.
Hecate | 12.04.04 - 3:58 pm | #

Thanks Snuggle.
Sue | 12.04.04 - 3:58 pm | #

Fif,

Ask yourself who's filled with hate? A group of friends chatting on a Saturday afternoon or someone who has to come troll and tell others how terrible they are? Projection is really an inefficient method for dealing with your shadow.
Hecate | 12.04.04 - 3:59 pm | #

Got that right, Snugglebunny. Same for Casa de Dunwoody.
millerdunwoody | 12.04.04 - 3:59 pm | #

I have to come up with some kind of item to be auctioned off at fundraiser tonite. My cheap husband won't give up his car, but I found some bottles of champagne (can't imagine how they escaped my attention) but they could be up to 6 years old. I see some bubbles, but does anyone know champagne's shelf life?
Sue

Good question. I think the "self-life" is pretty much forever (I have a hard time believing a bottle of champagne would lose its bubbliness), but the drinkability has a lot to do with the vintage, namely the acidity and sugar content of the particular vintage.

That's why some wines improve with age, and others don't. Some are best drunk sooner rather than later.

Maybe do a Google search of your brand and vintage to see what's up with it.

Good luck.
Stinky | 12.04.04 - 3:59 pm | #

The question is not whether Rumsfeld will ever stop targeting hospitals, but whether our news media will ever start calling him on it.

How many crimes of the century will it take to get these people off their ass?
millerdunwoody | 12.04.04 - 4:00 pm | #

Re Michelle Maglaladroit & Sex

There was an old, one-eyed whore at Subic who was reputed to have taken on the entire crew of the JFK over a one-week port call...Any relation?
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 4:01 pm | #

chris/tx - I think the Fla proposal is a really good start, too. I just want verifiable paper ballots as part of the overhaul. And I do believe most people of whatever persuasion agree with that.

I don't know for certain, but that's the impression I've been getting for awhile from people.
Tena | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 4:02 pm | #

Are the freepers actually fighting to see who has the privilege of carting around Rummy's jock strap?
That's just sick, FIF.
And something only a closet fag like yourself would be interested in.
TJ | 12.04.04 - 4:02 pm | #

A friend of mine told me her fundie mother wouldn't let her ride a bike with the banana shaped seat as a small child for the same reason. Don't ask me what's up with that because I don't know.
Incognito - 2:54 pm

Damn, I thought my stepmother was the person stupid enough to believe that.
/shakes head sadly

Tow
TheOtherWashington | 12.04.04 - 4:02 pm | #

You liberal fags are not fit to carry his jock strap. He is what real men should be.
Freedom Isn't Free
George Johnston | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 4:03 pm | #

Hhahahahaha. Some ass upstream claims our soldiers are fighting for our freedom. Yep, blowing Iraq to smitherenes makes me free. Stirring up a hornets nest in the Middle East makes me double free.

I guess the Army wouldn't take him. Low IQ and all.
bigvic | 12.04.04 - 4:03 pm | #

The funny part is they are too stupid to realize they are shooting themselves in the foot. By telling lies like that which are trivial for the people involved to learn are lies, they immediately call everything else they say, however true it might be, into question.

Same thing happened with the war on drugs. Once people figured out that reefer was not going to make you go mad, they figured the powers that be were probably lying about other drugs as well. I always thought that may have contributed to the crack cocaine explosion.

A few years ago I caught some panel of old men in their seventies who advise the DEA about which drugs should be placed in which category, and swear to god they were still going on about the addictiveness of marajuana and how it is a gateway drug because it causes the innocent to associate with the criminals that deal it. Never occured to them that if it weren't illegal, the innocent wouldn't have to deal with the nasty dealer. At the time I was getting chemo for breast cancer. A toke or two would have helped.
QuiltLady in NY | 12.04.04 - 4:03 pm | #

guess the Army wouldn't take him

Nah, he never tried to enlist. They're so desperate they'll take anybody these days. He's just a chickenhawk pussy who's scared to join up but makes himself feel brave and important slinging invective anonymously on the internets.
Hecate | 12.04.04 - 4:05 pm | #

Bought it at Pugliese's vineyard in Long Island - one of the last family owned places left. Pat Pugliese paints certain bottles with nail polish, making them 'collectibles'.
Sue | 12.04.04 - 4:05 pm | #

bigvic - I guess we should be asking trollboy where he's stationed in Iraq, shouldn't we?

Howsabout it, troll boy? Where you stationed? I'm sure you are in the military and in Iraq, since it is your patriotic duty to go fight for freedom there. I mean, that's you whole point, right?
Tena | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 4:05 pm | #

Freedom Isn't Free,

Hatred?

We learned it from watching you!
Jesse | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 4:06 pm | #

Tena sez: I think the Fla proposal is a really good start, too. I just want verifiable paper ballots as part of the overhaul.

Yep, it's a good start -- without early voting this year, the lines would have been beyond belief, and they were still bad in many places.

But if we don't implement your latter point, it's meaningless.
Silleigh | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 4:06 pm | #

Wow, the level of intolerance of dissenting views and of bare-fanged America hatred just screams from so many of the postings here, I really hope your all proud of yourselves. In the next four years I hope and pray that the far left hatemongers are fianlly held accountable for this kind of filth. no one supports the 1st amendment more strongly than I, but these rants have as much to do with freedom of speech as yelling fire in a crowded theater. I know the Founders wanted to allow free speech, but they also intended it to be RESPONSIBLE free speech which this so clearly and obviously is not. So please enjoy your fun while it lasts, which hopefully will not be for very much longer.
Freedom Isn't Free | 12.04.04 - 4:06 pm | #

Or the bottle could be vinegar. Sorry, Freedom, did I interrupt you?
Sue | 12.04.04 - 4:09 pm | #

Dog shit in winter is easier to "handle" (one might say) cuz it's frozen solid...at least it is here...
Konopelli

Kudos to Konopelli.

Not only is this the most clever post of the day, it bears the greatest truth.Beyond picking a bit of puppie poop myself today, I've begun drinking and listening to X this afternoon.

"White Girl", "Johnny hit and run Paulene"...I tell ya, it's just some of the best American rock music ever.
Cleveland Bob | 12.04.04 - 4:09 pm | #

Howsabout it, troll boy? Where you stationed? I'm sure you are in the military and in Iraq, since it is your patriotic duty to go fight for freedom there

LOL. Wouldn't have time to freep if he was fightin' them terraists, though.
bigvic | 12.04.04 - 4:10 pm | #

So...what exactly is your "dissenting view"? Just one would be fine. So far, I haven't seen you write anything apart from "liberals are hateful and hate filled and they like to hate, too".
Backslider | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 4:10 pm | #

CNN's quick vote right now is "Are you pleased that Donald Rumsfeld is staying on as defense secretary?" 68% say no Rummy must have pictures of Shrub in his coke days stashed somewhere.
TJ | 12.04.04 - 4:10 pm | #

Fact: Almost all heroin addicts have used marijuana.

Also Fact: Almost all of them started drinking milk at an early age.

And almost all bald homeowners have green grass.

That's why, when analyzing statistical research, we generally don't try to draw causal connections from correlational research...
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 4:10 pm | #

Freedom Isn't Free,

I think Liberals are open to listening to dissenting views when the person they come from shows a little willingness to listen themselves.

Call people fags and talking about Rummy's nutsack does not invite a real discussion.
Jesse | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 4:11 pm | #

And by the way, give our troops and our persident some respect, dammit. They are figting to preserve your freedom even though you don't deserve it, you morons.

What is a persident? Is figting something to do with all those figs we buy from the Middle East? What are the freedoms that I have that are being protected here? It's you guys that are busily removing all my freedoms. Who needs terrorists when we have wingnuts?
Echidne | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 4:11 pm | #

Wow, the level of intolerance of dissenting views...

In the next four years I hope and pray that the far left hatemongers are fianlly held accountable for this kind of filth.... So please enjoy your fun while it lasts, which hopefully will not be for very much longer.

Will someone please check on Irony real quick? I think she just locked herself in the bedroom with several bottles of barbiturates and some vodka again...
Silleigh | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 4:13 pm | #

Here I thought this country was founded on the idea of dissent, against big corps. and imperialism.

Hmm.
dieselcreek | 12.04.04 - 4:13 pm | #

FIF-Who gets to define responsible free speech--you????????
no one supports the 1st amendment more strongly than I

You're a liar.
Sweet Sue | 12.04.04 - 4:13 pm | #

Actually fif, the founders wanted free speech for rich white landowners. Are you a rich white landowner?
Porter Goose | 12.04.04 - 4:13 pm | #

FIF, if you find the truth here offensive, move to Russia. Putin's getting more and more controlling every day. I'm sure you'll enjoy it. At least join the military. Bush needs more cannon fodder in Iraq.

Do you know what the national guard members are calling the Iraq adventure? "Operation Oil Isn't Free." That should comfort you.
TheOtherWashington | 12.04.04 - 4:14 pm | #

I know the Founders wanted to allow free speech, but they also intended it to be RESPONSIBLE free speech

ari...ari fliescher... is that you, how ya been - ya little bald bag of lies?
focus | 12.04.04 - 4:15 pm | #

Condi Rice
a stack of bibles
a strap on dildo
George W. Bush
a video camera
Laura Bush
Keep America Perverse | 12.04.04 - 4:16 pm | #

Do you know what the national guard members are calling the Iraq adventure? "Operation Oil Isn't Free." That should comfort you.

freakin brilliant .... when the iconoclasts rise up in the military it speaks volumes to the disaster level
syntallic | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 4:16 pm | #

Silleigh - Alas, poor Irony, I knew her, Silleigh.

She's really taken a beating over the last 4, 5 years. I don't know if she will survive the next 4. I think she's going to have to be institutionalized and receive shock therapy to get her up and ambulating again once the darkness has lifted. Whenever the hell that is.
Tena | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 4:17 pm | #

no one supports the 1st amendment more strongly than I, but...

Butt-out, shitstick. And remember to flinch when you hear that sound in the dark, grab your balls, and pray...
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 4:17 pm | #

Here's my kind of Christmas spirit, from Jamie Oliver via The Guardian:

Christmas margarita

Margaritas are great in hot weather, but try this winter twist on the old classic. It works even better with clementines that aren't really as sweet as they should be. Serves two to four.

100ml Cointreau
100ml fresh clementine juice
1 lime, juiced
1 handful ice cubes

Mix everything in a jug, stir and serve.

Sounds so yummy! I love the Naked Chef.
TJ | 12.04.04 - 4:20 pm | #

Tena -- let's hope that, unlike most of us, Irony has a decent healthcare plan.
Silleigh | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 4:21 pm | #

Does FIF strike anybody as suspiciously
similar to that firefighter guy?
hugo z. scuminasuit | 12.04.04 - 4:21 pm | #

Remember kids - every day is "Ignore the Moronic Brownshirt Fuck Day."

Because nothing is lonelier than a circle jerk of one...
dave | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 4:22 pm | #

Git 'im, Kono!
bigvic | 12.04.04 - 4:22 pm | #

"Operation Oil Isn't Free."

That's gotta be somekinda landmark: the guys doing the dying are actually acknowledging the lying that's gonna kill 'em, one by one...LLies? What Lies? Oh you know, the one's about how the invasion/occupation of Iraq ISN'T about oil. You know that one, doncha shitstick???
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 4:22 pm | #

What do you called Freedom isn't Free in a wig, on his knees, and begging for more between odd hooting noises?
-Liddy Dole on a good day.
bebe rebozo | 12.04.04 - 4:23 pm | #

shitstick is receiving the latest talking points from fyling monkey right talk radio. He will be getting back to us later I'm sure.
Porter Goose | 12.04.04 - 4:23 pm | #

Irony spends a lot of time at my house.

While it's cousin "smart-ass" spends a lot of time at my friend Doug's house.

We're our own entertainment.

.
dieselcreek | 12.04.04 - 4:23 pm | #

Sounds so yummy! I love the Naked Chef.
TJ

Dunno, tj: 200 ml would barely dent my capacities for liquid joys like that...
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 4:24 pm | #

Hoo boy. There must be humor drugs in the water today. I don't think I've ever laughed so hard.

Keep it up.
bigvic | 12.04.04 - 4:26 pm | #

It's Dubya's world - we just die in it!
dave | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 4:26 pm | #

Smart-Ass has been known to pay my house a visit, rather more often than is probably good for me or my marriage.
Tena | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 4:27 pm | #

What do you called Freedom isn't Free in a wig, on his knees, and begging for more between odd hooting noises?
-Liddy Dole on a good day.
bebe rebozo

bebe, i just spewed my mackeson's all over the keyboard...time out to dry the keys...
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 4:27 pm | #

So Liddy Dole comes home one night and finds Bob watching porn on TV with his pants down around his ankles. She is silent for a moment, then says,"Is that a pencil in your hand or are you just glad to see me?"
bebe rebozo | 12.04.04 - 4:30 pm | #

All right, damn it. Let's cut to the chase: what in the fuck are we going to do about these fools? Storm the White House and publically hang the MF? Say the word people, and we will respond. But just verbally masturbating will do nothing. Let's hear it. I gave my ideas, no one here seems to have any others Let's hear a plan of action for taking back America. Or should we all move to the Ukraine which obviously has a much lower tolerance for bullshit than we do.
Dances with Donkeys | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 4:30 pm | #

Hate Bush? For what he has done and what he will do to my country, sadly, yes.

Hate America? Hell,no! See above on why I hate Bush.

Hate Christianity? Some posters here do. A lot who aren't Christian themselves don't seem to have a problem with most Christians. Some of us are Christians - though I dunno if the troll counts Catholics like cmdicely and myself as such.

Anent the cooter discussion - are we back to box turtles again?
Ahianne | 12.04.04 - 4:31 pm | #

If I keep laughing like this I'll be staring in one of those Abs Master commmercials.
bigvic | 12.04.04 - 4:32 pm | #

Since I can't be OT in an open thread, Another Topic: We're gonna have to wait awhile for that testosterone patch, if we happen to be in need of it, while erectile dysfunction drugs are advertised every few seconds on the telly. The FDA went AGAINST the recommendations of its own advisory panel to kill this one.

Link to Healthtalk site

Haven't women with low sex drives been treated with testosterone for YEARS? Whoops, what am I thinking, we're no longer supposed to HAVE sex drives...
Silleigh | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 4:37 pm | #

Here's an idea,

Start building more progressive think tanks. Anyone near a college, go talk with profs., make it a non-profit, and so on...

I run a micro-business, and I have spent lots of time on pro-bono work. There are plenty of us out there will to help local candidates run for office or develop a non-profit...
dieselcreek | 12.04.04 - 4:37 pm | #

will=willing

do'h
dieselcreek | 12.04.04 - 4:39 pm | #

Silleigh, sex drugs for women need always lots of scrutiny. They have to be completely safe before they can be approved. Not so with drugs that are intended, for example, to grow hair. They can cause the worst kind of congenital abnormalities in any fetus that just happens to be in the same house, but they're still available. Only with big admonishments to tell women not to touch the stuff. This is just sane and rational in the faith-based world.
Echidne | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 4:42 pm | #

The Israeli Army has reached a new low:
Of all the revelations that have rocked the Israeli army over the past week, perhaps none disturbed the public so much as the video footage of soldiers forcing a Palestinian man to play his violin.
The incident was not as shocking as the recording of an Israeli officer pumping the body of a 13-year-old girl full of bullets and then saying he would have shot her even if she had been three years old.
Nor was it as nauseating as the pictures in an Israeli newspaper of ultra-orthodox soldiers mocking Palestinian corpses by impaling a man's head on a pole and sticking a cigarette in his mouth.

But why are the Israelis upset? Because the violin incident mocked the Holocaust: Israelis put great store in a belief that their army is "the most moral in the world" because it says it adheres to a code of "the purity of arms".
TJ | 12.04.04 - 4:42 pm | #

Or should we all move to the Ukraine which obviously has a much lower tolerance for bullshit than we do.

They certainly have interesting
dental plan options.
watertiger | 12.04.04 - 4:42 pm | #

Silleigh,

Don't hold your breath waiting for that patch. The ladies are just supposed to be tickled pink that big, strong, virile men like Bob Dole can "get some wood".

Viagra is covered by medical/health plans but often birth control pills aren't. It's a man's world alright.
bigvic | 12.04.04 - 4:44 pm | #

...halfway through Dolores Gray's "Not Since Nineveh" number I TURNED GAY !!!!!

David Ehrenstein!

ROTFLOL in pain!

Did you just sort of slap your forehead and say "Well, fuck me, I think I'm gay."? Did you start screaming for a glass of Chardonnay? Did you suddenly have an urge to do a floral arrangement?? Details, we want details.

L.O.L.
Nevermore | 12.04.04 - 4:44 pm | #

Really OT (and really trivial):
Anybody know when OU and Colo are playing in the double sixpack, or, if they already have, what was the score?
(slinks away, embarrassed)...
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 4:45 pm | #

Viagra is covered by medical/health plans but often birth control pills aren't.

Walk softly and carry a big stick.
-- Liddy Dole
watertiger | 12.04.04 - 4:47 pm | #

I'm proud of the liberal tag
I love every pervert and fag
And I think it's a crime,
If you don't take the time,
To soil and spit on our flag.
Lime Ickey | 12.04.04 - 4:48 pm | #

Jeezus Jujubees...
You damn wimmen want it all?? or whatt???
You can already take everything we guys have, leaving us spent and slack, and still want more?

Now you want sex drugs, too?

And testosterone???WTF izzat?

Gotta be some fiminazi plot to steal our vital bodily fluids...

God, I'm glad the godly christians are finally taking over, and gonna tamp down all those raging feminazi hormones...
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 4:50 pm | #

Maglalang-Malkin isnt an Asian Ann Coulter, she's a piss-poor, second-rate younger Ann Coulter.

Just to be clear.
Monica_CA | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 4:50 pm | #

Laugh it up, America Haters. You have no facts, like they do at Frontpagemag or Little Green Footballs or Lucianne.com. There are more of us than you. We will smoke you out. We will expose you for the terrorists and traitors you are. True patriot love strikes back!
Freedom Isn't Free | 12.04.04 - 4:50 pm | #

Lime Ickey has done it agin.
He's gone and made fun of our sins.
Our open diversity
to him's a perversity
but to us all his arguements spin.
gonzo | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 4:50 pm | #

FIF-Who gets to define responsible free speech--you????????
no one supports the 1st amendment more strongly than I

You're a liar.

More like a clown.

And I mean that literally.

FiF's posts are nothing more than poorly sautered trollrant. Throw in a couple gratuitous references to filth. Mix with america hatred and intolerance of dissent. Add a dash of intentionally ironic nascent fascism. Top it off with some support the troops. Give it a deww good Shakes and you've got a FiF post. It's not that hard, really.

It's like making poetry from those magnet things you used to see on everyones refrigerator
Carpbasman | 12.04.04 - 4:51 pm | #

but never mind the close italics.

Just to be slip-shod.
Monica_CA | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 4:51 pm | #

Any idea why when I type the url for this site into my address bar, I get sent to the "Abundant Bible" website? Links to the site seem to work fine, though.
Johnny | 12.04.04 - 4:51 pm | #

I suppose the Israeli army is moral the way our invasion of Iraq was honest and just and moral.
bigvic | 12.04.04 - 4:52 pm | #

few good shakes, that is
Carpbasman | 12.04.04 - 4:52 pm | #

Lemme get this straight?

Wouldn't a piss-poor second-rate, younger, Mann Coulter be an improvement?

just sayin...
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 4:52 pm | #

Carpbasman
how went the test?
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 4:54 pm | #

(slinks away, embarrassed)...

Haven't played yet, don't ask me how I know.
Another Bruce | 12.04.04 - 4:54 pm | #

True Patriot Love strikes back!
What in the hell does that mean? It sounds kinky.
TJ | 12.04.04 - 4:56 pm | #

Mr. President, do you know the difference between cowboy hats and tampax?

Answer- Cowboy hats are for assholes.
coitus bush | 12.04.04 - 4:57 pm | #

Konipelli; An improvement over what?
gonzo | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 4:57 pm | #

True patriot love strikes back!
Freedom Isn't Free

Remember, shitstick: sound, balls, pray...
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 4:57 pm | #

Gotta be some fiminazi plot to steal our vital bodily fluids...

Heh. Are you auditioning for the new HHS job? By god, you're hired.
bigvic | 12.04.04 - 4:57 pm | #

Up Nort' Wisconsin story:

My step-grandpa "White Cloud"-(nickname, he's 1/2 Amer. indian) took some viagra when it first came out.

He works early in the morning driving a big-rig haulin' logs. We'll, I'm not sure if he took too many the night before or if it just had a longer effect on him, but he went to work with a woody.

Of course the guys at the shop caught on pretty quick (long term erections are really painful). He was teased to no end the whole week...

So old White Cloud was jumpin' in and out of a semi all day with a rocket in his pocket.

He still talks about it.
dieselcreek | 12.04.04 - 4:57 pm | #

Gotta be some fiminazi plot to steal our vital bodily fluids...

Heh. Are you auditioning for the new HHS job? By god, you're hired.
bigvic | 12.04.04 - 4:57 pm | #

Konopelli --

I suppose if you're looking for just the right shrieking, evil, wackadoo, wild-eyed replacement for the aging harpy party "girl" that is Ann the Mann...

Especially since she's younger and less well-kown. That way you don't have to pay her as much and she'll try even harder.
Monica_CA | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 4:58 pm | #

bacause anytime you mispell "spot" as "psot" in a blogspot address it redirects you to that site

See:
http://www.atrios.blogpsot.com/

http://www.digbysblog.blogpsot.com/

http://dneiwert.blogpsot.com/
Carpbasman | 12.04.04 - 4:59 pm | #

Meta trolls. Tedious.
Backslider | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 5:00 pm | #

You have no facts, like they do at Frontpagemag or Little Green Footballs or Lucianne.com.

Settles it. This one has to be a parody. Some are parodies of wingers; some are parodies of humans. That's why it's getting hard to tell the difference.

* * *

Johnny, you're makin' a typo. http://atrios.blogpot.com (notice lack of "s" in "blogspot") is taken by Abundant Bible. Cute, huh?
Silleigh | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 5:00 pm | #

Hey, isn't "true patriot love" part of a verse of "Oh Canada"? So, if true partiot love strikes back is that some kind of thinly veil terroristic thread from our so-called friend to the North?
Monica_CA | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 5:01 pm | #

Gotta be some fiminazi plot to steal our vital bodily fluids..

gotta love rush boy for sure
syntallic | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 5:01 pm | #

watertiger,

I just clicked on the dental plan link. Oy. If that kind of dental work catches on here I will faint.
bigvic | 12.04.04 - 5:02 pm | #

But Carpbasman covers this ever so more comprehensively. I remembered seeing somewhere that a common typo in Eschaton's URL results in a Bible site. Had to try several screwups of "blogspot" before I got one.
Silleigh | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 5:02 pm | #

Monica:
exshullay, i was thinkin 'bout that one-eyed whore at Subic...;> (is that a smiley?
Konopelli | 12.04.04 - 5:02 pm | #

oh kee-ryst I cannot type today. Haven't been drinkin' or smokin. Maybe that's the problem...
Monica_CA | Homepage | 12.04.04 - 5:03 pm | #

whoops, "ever so MUCH more..."

Can I STILL claim the need for more coff