Welcome to the Commenting Pixie Party!
yay! I'm glad Puppy is safe where he belongs. I've already got more than a week's worth of whining out of the way at my own blog, but I can't resist the chance to be first (assuming nobody types faster than me this time).
Hooray for finding Puppy!
Songbird's Top Ten Wednesday Whines:
10) Pure Luck is gone for at least six weeks working horrifically long hours in Non-Contiguous New England State. Today is his birthday. The total celebration: singing of Happy Birthday over the phone.
9) Molly had a tick today. I realized I had forgotten to treat the dogs with Frontline. I am a bad dog mother.
Both dogs really, really need a bath. I cannot wash them alone. I will have to pay for a trip to the groomer.
7) Groomers are expensive.
6) In the next few days I have crisis financial meetings with both the church council and the church nursery school.
5) There's nothing like having Pure Luck out of town, extra expenses and worries about money at church to make me want to go shopping (online or in person) for things I don't really need such as more books, yarn or CDs, when I have the least justification for spending the money.
4) I promised myself I wouldn't buy any new yarn, books or CDs this month, for spiritual rather than fiduciary reasons, and I really shouldn't whine about a decision made for that reason, but it's possible I picked a bad day to give up shopping.
3) I don't have enough energy to make this into a clever rhyme. Surely I won't win a prize this week.
2) I'm reduced to using Airplane! references and then drawing attention to them.
And--the number one whine on Songbird's list of Wednesday Whines--
1) My bed is really, really big, and it feels too fireplacein' lonely.
Also, why does 8 with a parentheses doo-dad have to turn into fireplacein' Joe Cool when I'm feeling so whiney already?
Grrr. Can I just whine that I'm trying to whine and keep getting errors?????
Alas, this week I have a whine
Some crazy in this life of mine
I know it's not a real big deal
No life or limb at risk, for real
I whine because I have a choice
(Perhaps I should consult dear Boice?)
You see they asked me to say when
I want to go for tenure, then
They gave me options, 1-2-3
This is a problem, don't you see?
I thought I'd go up in 2 years
And on that thought I based my fears
But now? I could go up year next
Look in my eyes, you'll see them vexed
I just don't know how to decide
I'm asking people far and wide
(you see there is a backstory
of a new hire, in all her glory
allowed 2 years from another job
but then her life-sob sob sob-
it fell apart, she got divorced
she slacked at work, it was the worst
and then it seemed that all forgot
the 2 years prior, they counted not
she thought that fine, time to catch up
escape that nasty publishing slump
but now? the dean, he has remembered
and has asked her choice be tendered
in a memo delivered next week
(this is no time to be the meek)
she must declare her intentions
to the scrutinizing henchmans)
And so decisions, 1-2-3
1 is next year, so quickly
2 is 2 years, as I thought
3 is complicated: ought
I opt for 2 years and then change
My mind I might could then arrange
And early bid in just a year
Though "early" has some risks, I hear
I'm leaning toward the option: 1
The reasons? Waiting is not fun
The sooner that I get a raise
The happier will be my days
(part II)
My teaching record is superb
And there's no question that I've served
And true, I have a lot of words
In print (although none are proverbs)
I hesitate because of pubs
I feel my record's but a stub
of what I'm truly able to do
if I put my mind right to
My record whole, it is enough
for that nasty tenure stuff
although I have a nasty hole
where 2003 & 4 should go
That said, I'm back upon the trail
My work, it is not getting stale
I'm publishing at a dandy pace
But next year? Feels like its a race
So if I go for option 1
The next few months won't be much fun
As I polish off some pubs
So editors will show the love
In time for me to be reviewed
in colors nice and rosy hued
So the U can say "dear grrrrl,
Please stay forever in our world"
A choice. A choice. I must decide
Which path my tenure clock will ride
Yesterday it all seemed clear
I'd go up in two nice calm years
But one? So tempting, really it is
I so want done with the tenure biz
I guess next week I'll let you know
Which was I've chosen to go
Til then, be sure I will not rest
I'll work real hard and then I'll stress
(to top it off, I'm getting sick
oh double whammy meanie ick)
Wow. Early votes to profgrrrrl and Songbird.
::weeps::
Not only am I not clever enough for a poem, profgrrrrl has a two-part one.
WAAHHH!!!!!
An evening whine in one run-on sentence:
One can only hope that the incessant buzzing of helicopters overhead could be because of the surprise resignation of Zippy the President and not just news helicopters covering the massive clusterfuck (clusterfireplace?) of a traffic jam on the Westside tonight (did I have to be out in it? Yes, yes I did.) because of Zippy's attendance at a nearby fundraiser.
I swear, it's like Apocalypse Now out there. Not as bad as during the OJ debacle, but worse than the last canyon brushfire...
Oooh! Wednesday whining again! I'm sorry I haven't been around these parts in a while...it was wierd/crazy getting the new blog started up again and catching back up with everyone!
This week's whines are as follows:
1. I have no permanent job (I was laid off in August)
2. The temp job I thought I lined up for october just fell through
3. I have no savings
4. I have no apartment (as of Aug 31)
(anti whine - I do have great friends who are offering floors, couches and extra beds)
5. I have no health insurance
6. I have to move to my Home State because I can't support myself out here (while this doesn't sound so bad, I've got a few issues with this that will need to be gotten over)
7. Dad, who was going to pay for my move (from West coast to East coast), was laid off today
(anti whine - he got an excellent severance package so will still be able to help me some)
8. Yesterday, in an effort to commit to my decision to move across the country I removed myself from consideration for the only job prospect I had (does that make sense?) becase it's here and I want to move. Of course, this was BEFORE I found out about Dad's situation. I probably wouldn't have gotten it anyway, but it wasn't officially over yet and knowing about Dad would have been something that would have made me take that job if it were offered to me - now it's too late.
9. My stepmother...also jobless, by the way - recently laid off too...told me about Dad's work 'situation' but I'm not supposed to know so I have to hide it from Dad until he confesses (or risk getting her in trouble).
10. My mother is scheduled to have surgery in one week to have NINETY percent of her colon removed. 90. percent. I'm started to get nervous about this.
Overall - pretty ugh and stressful times with lots to complain about (not that this is any different from my normal perma-whining).
"not as bad as OJ, but..." -- kathy r definitely should get the city of angels award.
songbird and profgrrrl for style.
YAY for puppy's homecoming!
Hurrah for the prodigal pup!
As for my whine, it`s truly the whiniest - old before his time, curmudgeonly, cantankerous, lil` me is currently beset by the vengeful return of an old back injury, originally incurred whilst stooping for heavy baggage, complicated further by an evil chiropractor.
Thusly, I find myself in a country without a National Health Service, and an insurance company that won`t cover me as it was an existing injury...ouch...can`t make it to the doctors without getting some new health insurance, which I can`t do right now because I can`t get a day off for a week...bloody Japanese working ethic...and my meagre finances are quivering at the thought of actual medical bills..woe...
Awww, I'm glad he's found.
Me, I have a whine that, although I most likely don't have celiac disease (the IgG test was in the "equivocal" range, the rest were negative), there was a bit of a nasty surprise in the test results.
My creatinine level has gone up two tenths of a point. Creatinine up means kidney function down.
So now I'll probably get to do all kinds of tests to see if it's just a meaningless fluctuation or if I'm succumbing to the family kidney disease. My chances are probably about 50/50, given the statistics in the family.
Of my grandfather's generation, 100% had it. Of my mom's generation, it's only something like 3 out of 5 that have ended up with dialysis and/or transplants. Only. Yeah.
And, avoiding corn is harder than I thought. Again. As always.
This time it's whole wheat flour from a factory that cleans its machinery with cornstarch, and 100% maple syrup with the likelihood of vegetable (read: corn or soy) oil used as antifoaming agents that are the probable culprits. Last week it was bread made with baker's yeast grown on corn.
None of this stuff is labeled, of course.
Seriously, I'm beginning to have thoughts of just throwing up my hands in defeat and settling for some level of corn and/or soy contamination in Baby E's diet. But it makes her so miserable. A couple of weeks ago she had an allergic reaction just from touching the floor at church and then her mouth. Argh.
Seriously, sometimes I wonder what in fireplace I'm doing reproducing with all these hereditary issues in the genes.
I am happy this week *crosses fingers*. I vote for betty. I hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I have a really bad head cold, three preentations, and 4 3-hour long labs this week. Still.
And, worst of all: The wine is gone. Because somebody has no self control. I won't mention any names, but it starts with a J and rhymes with Jeni.
Seriously, why must an opened bottle of whine mean it all must be drunk that night? Grrr.
Whine, whine, whine.
I vote for Songbird. I'm on her wavelength this week.
I have the oh so orginal whine of being tired. as always. bet no one else is tired.
and the nursing in the night must have been a little careless becasue this morning i have this big clear blister like thing right on the tip of the left nipple. (very specific, i know) It feels like someone has inserted a hot needle everytime he nurses now, and it's been four fireplacing times in the past two hours.
votes for profgrrl for style and better for substance.
Still having the pain, which has migrated. I now think I have kidney issues. Either that, or I'm crazy. Which would be fine if they'd just give me some drugs for that.
Not liking the job right now. They're plying me with toys but it's not going to work. So I'm applying for two jobs. And I'm having a conversation with people in other departments on campus. I'm not entirely sure I want to do this. But I know I can't stay in my current position much longer. It's killing me.
Anti-whine: email from my advisor saying he's pleased with the latest chapter. Woo hoo!
Whine: haven't done much work on the next because of the medical crap. Must go to bed at 9:00 tonight.
Okay, so I seriously shouldn't whine until I've had at least 4 doses of caffeine. Bottle of whine= bottle of wine. Though I have little self-control when it comes to the whine, too.
1st presentation was terrible. TERRIBLE. The person in charge of collaberation put in one sentence on my 3 hours of research synopsis and interpretation. Apparently, she was just really self motivated, because 2 of the other people in the group had the same experience.
Is it Friday yet? And why don't they have any fireplacing tequila in Edinburgh?!?!?
Early votes for PK and Betty. I just can't make up my mind this week...
Laura, I hope they find out what is going on. Did you ever get the results from the ultrasound from your doctor? And yippee on the chapter!
I had a dream that I wrote a chapter last night, does anyone think that counts?
I won't subject anyone to my whines. Because really, they haven't changed.
I will, however, offer up some biscotti I found in the pantry when I was packing it up to move though! Chocolate...I tasted it, it's still good...
My whine, she is not so much a whine as a lament.
Losses to cancer this week: one beloved friend/mentor/colleague, of leukemia; one wife of another dear colleague, of a long-ago brain cancer that came back - both far too young.
Less-dire, more whine-like, closer to home: teh small hyper elderly dog ruptured his knee ligament on Saturday and is having surgery today. The surgery I'm sure will go fine (see anti-whine below), but the recovery period, oy: weeks and weeks of confining teh hyperness, loud dog with no exercise, explaining to him why he can't go out for walks with his sister, carrying him up and down the stairs... And this weekend: no long-planned fall break trip to grandma's; no seeing old family friends visiting from England. And need I mention the thousands of dollars extracted directly through the i.v. they will hook up? On top of the thousands of dollars extracted during the final three days of my cat's life in August. Which of course I don't begrudge for a minute, but still. Oh, and let's not forget trying to explain to him this morning why he doesn't get any breakfast today.
Antiwhine: At least I can carry him. And at least fall break means I can spend five days watching him after he comes home from the hospital before I have to teach again. Also, we live in probably the best place in the world to be if you need high-end veterinary care. The vet practice we go to is owned by an orthopedic surgeon and they have a doggie rehabilitation facility complete with water therapy. We are hoping we qualify for water therapy, because we looooove to swim. (Possible further whine: explaining to sister-dog why she doesn't get to go along for swimming fun.)
I'm glad pup returned!
My whines...sigh.
Whine #1--The raging head/nose cold that has worn down the pint-sized members of our family for the past two weeks (first Liam, now Tessa) is now creeping into my sistem. I woke up with a sore throat and a runny nose--blech. And I have 40 more midterms to grade. And Tessa and Liam still aren't over *their* colds, so the whining and the irritability abounds in our house these days. And Liam is being incredibly loud right now and my head hurts.
Whine #2--I'm seriously tempted to stop work on my dissertation project, which I've been working on for about nine years now. My original committee said it was ready for defense back in 2004 but then my committee chair dropped off the committee suddenly due to health reasons and I had to scramble to reform my committee. Present-day committee has really put me (and my project) through the wringer and we don't see eye-to-eye on the original intent of the project. Basically they want me to rewrite everything with a different end in mind and write a whole new chapter as well and I'm just tired. Tired of it. Tired of thinking about whether or not I'm going to be judged on the completion of it. Tired about wondering whether or not there's a purpose to finishing it. I want to move on! I have other projects--a book I'm working on! Kids, family, job, life, etc. are filling me up these days--I'm maxed out. I feel like I've run out of room for this HORRIBLE HORRIBLE YOKE-AROUND-MY-NECK PROJECT.
Anyway...that's my biggest whine now. I'm teetering on a painful decision and can't help thinking I'll feel like a failure if I cut it loose.
Oh--and I vote for profgrrl and Jeni!
Maybe I'm biased by my own personal position, but I vote as many times as I can for Alissa. The dissertation woes, they always work for me.
I haven't told too many people yet, and haven't written on my blog yet because I'm not sure exactly how I want to say it, but I'm with Alissqa.
This dissertation shit: I quit. I don't wanna anymore.
This is my last year in my current teaching gig. I'm going to have to start considering a new career. If I can find a permanent glorified adjunct position at one of the colleges around here, I'd like that, but if not then I'll have to find some other thing to do. I really love teaching college students and I'm really damned good at it, but it seems relatively likely that my run is coming to an end.
Why do they make it so hard for smart people to finish their fireplacein' dissertations?
Just askin'.
Songbird--because the system is screwed up, built around the idea that people don't have lives. Oh, and then there's advisors with egos out the wazoo, petty politics, unrealistic expectations, etc.
Scriv, what about teaching private high school? I'm sorry you're quitting. I've been there, of course. And honestly, I don't think I'd be finishing now if a) Mr. Geeky weren't so awesome b) my adviser weren't so awesome and c) my blog friends weren't so supportive. Seriously.
Chichi--ultrasound was negative. I now have pain on my left side which might or might not be related. I have more doctor visits. Yay.
Good whines this week. Profgrrrrl gets style awards, but everyone's are good.
Oh, and I like Songbird's #8/cooldude--too funny.
Wow, Betty and PK, you get my votes. I hope both of you can weather these very diffcult times.
Also, I'm glad Puppy is found. Having a runaway dog myself, I know how it feels when you need a warm puppy to cuddle and you can't find him.
Ooo, so many worthy whines, and it's so early!
I actually have no real whine to offer this week, only one big anti-whine - it was my birthday yesterday and the hubby came through in style. 
So I thought I'd swing by here and offer birthday cake for everyone! And lots of sympathy for the whiners.
The loss of Lyra's Puppy (who was recently dubbed Snuggle) is one of my greatest fears. We've had a few scares, but it's always turned out OK.
My whine: I'm too busy to blog or read everyone else's extremely worthy whines. Must go read news in Russian so that I can talk about it in class today...in Russian. Bleh.
Anti-whine after a week I think it's safe to say we don't have bedbugs, no bedbugs. To say the least this is a huge relief, the bedbug stories I've seen out there are awfull.
Whine the managment in my division has gone crazy lately. They used to be fairly down to earth but lately they are getting obsessed with annoyingly classic manager things(constant updates, weekly reports on how much time you spend at your desk or in the lab, ect). I could go on and on, to say the least it's very uninspiring and it's really the last thing our group needs. We need inspiring leaders with a vision for the future and all we've got is a bunch of people who continually make us feel like we are failing at our jobs when we are not!
At least in a few weeks my boss will be out on maternity leave and I will have a 3 month reprieve.
My digital camera, it is broken. And despite not havign the money, I did the depressive shopping spree and bought a new one.
Also, the SPCA is full of cats. Full! Every cage is full. There is a pile of cages of kittens in the middle of the floor. There is another dozen (dozen!) cages in the basement full of more cats ready to go up to be shown but it needs to wait for the currently there cats to be adopted. (There are few dogs. Lots and lots of rabbits, and some hamsters.) It is so depressing.
Matilda had a little accident on my bed and between my ankles the other night. It was gross. Grosser than gross. Just like my apartment, which I am incapable of cleaning what with the depressive stuff, which feels stupid and fake anyways.
And I didn't win the 24 million dollar jackpot this weekend, which isn't right. I would do good stuff with all that money!
We got a dog yesterday. I don't know if that's a whine or an anti-whine. I've never really liked dogs, but Joe was so excited about it and I didn't want to be the jerk who denies her family a puppy. Okay, I did deny them a puppy. We got a 3 year old dog. Yeah, he's cute and sweet, but he's a dog! A dog! They smell and lick and bark and do other dog stuff. And my cats keep trying to kill him, and he keeps falling for it.
Have I ever mentioned that I really don't respond well to changes in my environment? Especially when those changes include dogs?
Oh, and there's drama at work. Stupid drama that I probably shouldn't write about. The business manager is all pissy that Joe and the girls came to see me on my lunch break yesterday. WTFireplace? Who cares? They sat in the break room and ate noodles. It wouldn't bother me so much except that I'm already annoyed with her for trying to needle information out of me to get one of my coworkers in trouble. It's like fireplacing high school around here.
my whine is that scrivener is quitting.
I think I'll vote for Alissa and Scriviner.
No big whines this week, just tired and down. And more than a bit jealous of my husband who now has 12 kid-free hours a week to himself.
I'm whining for the world that Scriv is thinking of leaving teaching. As I've said on other blogs, "I'm not an academic, nor do I play one on TV", but to me the state of education in this country is dire. It's too hard for educators to achieve their PhD, and the climate for teachers, from K through college, is ridiculously negative, even hostile. Parents act like fireplacin' idiots and raise college students who follow in their footsteps. So, that said, my whine is that there is the chance that the world of education will lose a damned good teacher. Bleh.
Happy to hear that Puppy has been found. Did I ever share the time I took apart the cold air returns in search of Baby Dollie? Parents do the most heroic things!
My whine? I'm tired, tired, tired to the bone, eye-itchy tired, stupid tired and I not only have to teach two classes (one from 7-10), but I have to mark over 50 freshman short assignments and seven seminar papers while also making time for grocery shopping and picking everyone up from school/work as it is nasty, spitting rain outside.
Ok--can I amend my whining by adding a new HUGE whine that just developed? Is it fair to just post the link to the whine? It's too exhausting to recreate here and it comes with a picture.
http://www.tagteamingit.blogspot.com
Just to be clear, I don't think of my comment up above as a whine. I mean, I certainly have whines and complaints about graduate school and about the dissertation process, and I sure as hell have complaints about the state of the academic job market. But most of the factors that have led me to this place are of my own making. And the decision to quit the diss is mostly a relief, not a whine.
But I do have a whine now. I've been thinking for a week or two now about how to write the post in which I let y'all know that I am quitting. I wanted to say it eloquently and clearly. But then I went and read Alissa's comment and just blabbed in a poorly-written comment that didn't even convey much of the sense of the decision for me. Sometimes I wish I was better at being more strategic about what I do and don't say and when and to whom.
Not that I don't want any of you to know, you understand. I just wish I'd done a better job of telling you.
I vote for Allysa and Scrivener, and PK and Betty. And of course Bridget for teh nipple blister - OUCH. And votes for Songbird too.
My whine: Another young soldier from My Town died in Afghanistan this week. He was loading a vehicle with supplies (food, water, etc) to take to a nearby village. The vehicle exploded - rigged with an IED. He was 23.
What the fireplace is Canada doing over there anyway? Fireplacing Conservative government anyway! They call it peacekeeping, but I think when bullets are flying past your head and people are blowing you up, that's called war. When are they going to get those young men and women out of this mess??
I'm so tired of watching the news clips of young men and women carrying their friend's casket off the aircraft. Most are the same age as my sons, and I just can't imagine the pain their families are going through. ANd for what purpose???
End of rant/whine. It's just so fireplacin' wrong.
My life is easier, isn't it,
Since #1-Son got old enough to sit
With his younger siblings? And my ease increased
When Daughter, the youngest, to middle school eased.
So now as long as one is home
With #2-Son, I can go alone
On trips for shopping, or shuttling t'other
To some extra-curricular activity or another.
But still I find a need to whine
About the demands they make upon mine
Pocketbook. Oldest and youngest play
In orchestras and often they
Have expenses due to the maintaining
Of their instruments and the training
Of their fingers and their brains
To play those beautiful refrains.
Also they must be clothed so neat
To make the orchestral vision complete.
And also these two children mine
Have brains so smart and grades so fine
As to make them eligible for
Special opportunities and trips galore.
Daughter has been accepted, it seems,
To a science camp of one's dreams --
A week and more of tromping on
Yellowstone and the Grand Tetons.
$750, clothes, and a sleeping bag are all she needs.
They supply all else, even band-aids if she bleeds.
'Tis cheap, I know, for nine long days,
But where are the band-aids for Mom's checkbook as she pays?
Oh my goodness, Alissa (sorry for the previous misspelling!) - mold is so incredibly icky. Especially the hamster-fuzzy variety.
Eeewwww....
My coworkers don't know how grateful they should be to the Whining Pixies because I'm venting here right now:
Whine: My entire "team" at work, EXCEPT for me, is in Washington DC putting on a conference. I worked like a dog helping get it ready - preparing materials, stuffing binders, etc - but they all get to go stay in a very nice hotel, hobnob with policymakers, and eat in nice restaurants.
I got to clean up the room we assembled the materials in. Thanks.
Interrelated Whine: On paper, I'm doing this for free right now. Or not on paper - on computer. Because my yearly term appointment here was screwed up by the new HR people, and (along wtih about half my coworkers) we were terminated as of 9/29. I discovered this when I went to my select benefits account and was informed that I was no longer in the system. "the System" still has several thousand dollars of MY earned income sitting, waiting to repay me for childcare expenses. But I can't access it. Oh, and my vacation and sick leave? Deleted. My retirement? Not sure. My current insurance status? Also not sure. Will I get paid tomorrow? Not sure. Will the computer try to get me to serve a probationary period? Hm. Not sure. What about my accrued time towards vesting? We'll see!
Anti-Whine: My "last day at work" was my husband's first official day at his new job - the Real Job, the Faculty Job, the hey-we're not-postdocs-anymore job. They'd said it wouldn't happen until November or December, but HR pushed through to get it started with the new federal fiscal year!
Part 1: I am sick with a mysterious wasting disease. Other than mild sore throat and stiff jaw, no symptoms other than the desire to be a slug in bed all day.
Part 2: I looked up "stiff jaw" on Web MD, because I was curious, and the first thing that came up was tetanus. So if I stop being able to open my mouth altogether, I'll guess I know what I have.
Part PS: Scrivener, I'm glad you've made a decision that takes some weight off your shoulders. But like yankee, I hope you'll be able to continue teaching somewhere you enjoy.
Well, my votes go to Alissa and Scrivener with the dissertation woes. Cos I know that personally. And the quitting of the acade-mania. Know that too. Makes me sad sad sad that people who are wonderful college teachers leave the field! Square donuts to you guys (just eating a square donut myself, a local midwestern state specialty).
And SO glad that Puppy was found!!! When I was oh, in my early 20s my beloved puppy (who I still slept with ever since I got him at age 3) was lost - taken by houskeeping at a hotel - and I cried harder at his loss than at the funeral for my grandmother, which was the reason for the stay in the hotel. He was found a week or so later and sent by the hotel back to me. The hotel staff was um, bemused at my grief and at my insistence that they keep looking for him. He was really.really clean when he returned, having been through the hotel's industrial washing machines... I'm not sure why I am going on so long? Just had a story to share, I guess (even if no whine).
I vote for PK, and Profgrrl for style. And Alissa's mold! for mullet, of course. Commiseration to all the dissertation woes; some of my colleagues like theirs but I think they're touched in the heads. It's a woeful process, indeed.
My whine: I feel whiiiiiiiiny. And tired. And guilty about being whiny and tired. Whine. Whine.
Two whines this week for me. 1) I am in capable of remembering that if I want to record something using my VCR I MUST leave the cable box on so that I don't record an hour of black screen and 2) the widsom teeth are KILLING. I was supposed to have them out 15 years ago and have been putting it off because I'm too scared, but the pain is constant now.....ugh.
My votes with PK for the "Was it a good idea to refill my gene pool?" whine and Alissa/Scrivener for the Academia Bites issue.
And kermit - tetanus would be the zebra here. The horse would be swollen glands under your jaw - I get them a lot with allergies and upper respiratory stuff,a nd even when you can't feel them as individual marbles under your jawline, they can manifest as jaw stiffness. They stink on ice, too 
Oh, I'm glad Puppy was found. That would have been heartwrenching indeed.
I could just echo JF -- I feel whiiiiiiny. I'm tired and my nipples hurt because I have some damn strain of thrush that keeps coming back despite repeated applications of gentian violet and vinegar baths and cutting down on my sugar intake and other measures that have ultimately proved worthless for more than a couple of days at a time and every day I consider quitting the whole breastfeeding thing because my boobs feel like they're full of broken glass and my nipples are separating from their aureolas(yeah, TMI. Sorry). Waaaaahhhhh!
Also, I'm tired and don't want to do laundry. Which desperately needs to be done, since we're coming off of week 2 of Another Nasty Stomach Virus at our house. ANSV has kept me from going anywhere, seeing anyone or cooking anything particularly tasty (or colorful, since I can be sure it will end up on the carpet or bedding later) for nearly two weeks now.
However, our baby still sleeps and is healthy (fourteen pounds at two months, y'all). And for that I am profoundly grateful.
Scrivner! I quit grad school right before the diss too. I am still teaching so it's still possible. It's not easy, but it's still possible. You just need to start working on the next step now.
Allisa - If you want to talk to someone about what it was like to quit, you're welcome to email me.
Everyone's whines are so good - I vote for PK and Scriv and Allisa and wolfa (because I know the "I bought it even though I'm broke" thing a little too well)
Double Ouch. A vote for Allison for Separatist Nipples.
Oh Scrivener--I wholeheartedly cast a big vote for you, too. I so so acutely feel your pain about the diss. The decision whether to abandon it or not is truly one of the most gut-wrenching ones I have ever made, or been in the process of making. I too *love* teaching and it pains me to think I may lose my job down the road if I don't finish. Why writing the *&@$ diss should be such a trial by fire, I don't know.
Come to think of it, my diss has been, these past nine years, not unlike the mold that has been growing behind our family room walls.
Sigh.
Is it normal for a 4 and 5-year-old to still drop/spill as much food on the floor as the 1-year-old who is PURPOSELY THROWING food on the floor? I ask you. The floor under the kitchen table looks like a minefield. If a piece of paper gets dropped, it sticks to the floor. Literally. And then it will be so sticky/filthy as to be unuseable.
It's gotten so bad that I'm seriously considering canceling school this morning (hazardous environment, you know) and having a lesson in how to sweep and mop linoleum instead.
Well, I was going to whine about how my boob hurt from the biopsy yesterday (a short digression--doesn't "core sample" sound like the doctor is drilling for oil in my breast?) but after reading the nipple woes, I think I'm fine.
And, I was grateful to hear "very benign appearance" yesterday as well.
The other whine is that I'm ironing clothes, and I've burned myself no less than 10 times and I'm not close to finished yet. Ow.
Votes for Scrivener and Alissa, and my new whine is the same as Julie's...
...and also, on the academia side of things -- I love German, but I'm not loving it this quarter. We've got a well-intentioned but oft-malfunctioning web component, a TA who is good, but not perhaps aware of the varied level of people coming into the class, and the threat of having to do online chats with other classmates.
And most of all, I'd rather be speaking Italian. But this class is necessary, and I do still like German -- my head just isn't quite in the right place for it. Nor is my usually decent German accent.
Usually, I am weirdly gifted with languages, so it's good for me to see things from the other side of the fence, but I can't figure out why a language that I was on such good terms with 6 months ago has suddenly halted its friendly negotiations with my brain.
Nomination for Elevated Risk of Mullet: "I can't figure out why a language that I was on such good terms with 6 months ago has suddenly halted its friendly negotiations with my brain."
Wow, do I ever second Jane Dark's whine. I'm feeling like I'll never learn German properly, and not in time to be able to do the research I need to do in Germany.
There are some serious Whines of Substance today! (Group Hug)
My actual whine today is small, but annoying: last week's International Cold (as a result of a weekend of conference-attendees from all over the world) killed last week's productivity. I've been racing to catch up again. Yesterday, I finally got to the book that I'm supposed to read for Thursday afternoon, and it turns out that there's a second volume. I got the second volume; both books are 500 pages long. I have 1000 fireplacing pages to read for Thursday afternoon. Thickly-written and translated from German.
Votes for Alissa and Scrivener!
Grad school and the whole serfdom system really is fireplacin' awful.
My old advisor has listed my occupation as "homemaker" on her web site with a little qualifier as though it might change, and I might come back to my senses and get a job in a lab or something. Ummmm...not gonna happen. Left the field. Never looked back.
One day I'll work again, probably teaching high school (I'm sure that will earn a qualifier too from her).
But, I really think that life is about the process. And if the process is miserable, and offers nothing in return, then you've gotta change paths.
Hugs and votes to you both!
And hugs to all the other pixies as well!
I have no *new* whines this week, but wanted to offer Three Cheers for the Finding of Puppy! because if he had remained lost, that would have been a stiff contender for Whine of Substance.
You know, I think there could be a whole separate blog world of "people who never finished their dissertations." I work with two such people, was one myself. I understand the need for researchers, but by fsm, we need teachers too.
Voting for scriv and Alissa. Mold, yuck.
Oh, and kermit, I've been on WebMD all day, and have diagnosed myself with everything from bladder cancer to diverticulosus.
well, I haven't been here in a while. Here's my whine for what it's worth.
I used to live in a small state that rhymes with hellaware. I left said state 3 1/2 years ago. I paid my hellaware taxes on time. 3 years after the fact, I get a bill saying that I underpaid and my money--PLUS FEES AND LATE CHARGES --is due in one week. I was away. When I got back, the bill is late and I am mad, and I call Hellaware. I am transferred to 10,000 people (roughtly the population of Hellaware) and they all say, "no, you're right. You can't be late on a bill that you didn't know you owed. I'll have my supervisor call you back." Nobody ever called back.
Today I got a call from a collections agent.
now, I'm inclined to just pay it to get rid of them, because I clearly cannot afford an attorney to get what is right and fair. But I didn't get paid this month for my second job. Due to a clerical error. I have no money. And today, the day I was supposed to be paid late, I found out I wouldn't be paid. Due to another clerical error. And was asked if I could hold off and just get two months pay at the end of October.
I responded by bursting into tears.
And I forgot to bring lunch to work and I'm starving. But going out is dumb because, well, I'm broke and a tax evader.
Oh, PPB! I'm sorry! That sounds awful. Hang in there.
And Queen of West Procrastination, my sympathies. I don't have to do that. Plus, my TA says I'm doing great, and that my Italian-influenced German accent actually is quite intelligible, and that all it does is make me sound less American, and more European. So. If I can just learn all my irregular imperfect forms, then maybe I'll be alright.
On second thought, "hang in there" sounds lame. I would be in hysterics.
Man, can I call a Fancypants Pizza Place and have them deliver you lunch? Or something? Seriously.
I've been waiting two long days for Wednesday to arrive... and after reading above, I fit right into the theme.
Monday morning, I received the comments from my advisor on the whole dissertation. What she didn't say: "Let's schedule the defense." (Although, anti-whine, she also didn't say, "This sucks! Why are you wasting your time?") It turns out that my writing has several really annoying, really ungrammatical nervous tics. Things that don't show up in a 10 page paper, but over the course of 260 pages, ooooh-wee! they're repulsive!
So I'm editing. And editing. And editing. Reader 2 (the one who loves me) hasn't responded yet. Reader 3 agrees with everything Advisor said. New intro, new conclusion, and fix all the writing foul-ups.
I need to finish this. The end is in sight. But the road between here and there is a long one, scattered with misplaced commas and overuse of the word "however."
Best to Scrivener, Alissa, and all the rest of the whining gang today. Thanks for being my morning study break. Now back to work.
Scrivener, I am going to second the teaching at a good private high school idea if you really love teaching and are really serious about getting out of academia. From what others who have jumped the academia ship and gone that route have told me, it as rewarding as teaching college students from the teaching standpoint without all the pressure to publish.
I just wrote a big long whine about how my kids are driving me crazy, and I've ended up yelling at each of them and/or bursting into tears along with them several times already this morning.
Then Baby E deleted the whole thing. She is extremely tired but won't take a nap or let me put her down anywhere. I don't know what her problem is, but I'm sick of the screaming--and screaming--and screaming. She doesn't really act like she's in pain. I just don't know.
The older kids played in the mud, found some water to splash in, and then came in the house with their shoes on--right across the carpet. They are seemingly incapable of changing their own clothes and are having meltdowns at every opportunity.
My big goal of sweeping and mopping the kitchen floor seems less and less likely as the day goes on.
And I have no clue what we're going to have for lunch. I'm so tired of cooking laborious from-scratch allergen-free meals.
I don't know why I can't stop crying. None of this stuff is that big of a deal. This is ridiculous.
Let me lead with the antiwhine (major): Taxman's back. And willing to do dishes, play musical beds, eat cereal for dinner, whatever it takes to prevent me from going over the edge after my week alone with the kids.
But, oh, the whines.
1) Apparently, his business trip coincided with Miss M's toddler bout of separation anxiety. Despite being totally well adjusted during her first two weeks, since then she has been a mess at school. Crying as soon as we turn on to the street where the school is. Sobbing as she gets walked into her classroom. Screaming for me even if I stay but dare to leave her side for one second.
2) I can only hope it will pass, but there is ANOTHER BUSINESS TRIP coming up in three weeks. Fireplace! Taxman, half-serious, said we could come (it's at Disney World), but I would have to be even more insane to spend 3 nights in a hotel and 3 days wandering around Disney with two kids under 3 by myself. (And no double stroller!)
3) I am sick. Again. For the fourth time in about six weeks. Nothing major, but methinks the sleep deprivation is playing havoc with my immune system. It could be just a cold, but I've been a doctor's kid long enough to know that banana-yellow snot usually isn't a good sign.
Antiwhine (minor): I think I was sleeping every time the number on the clock started with a 3 or a 4 last night. How's that for progress???
Blogging whine: Why the hell can't I figure out how to use trackback? Because I really need to use it today.
Antiwhine: Kids are still napping, so I can read the whines!
It's not ridiculous, PK.
This is a lame question, because I'm sure you've already looked into it. But are there support groups for mothers of children with severe food allergies like this?
Rther, it's not ridiculous to feel at wits' end over it.
PPB, the same thing happened to us a couple months ago, courtesy of a state next door to Hellaware. Actually, *whine whine*, it was entirely the fault of my sweet, darling, absentminded spouse who didn't pay his fireplacing taxes, but now it's my problem too. Same runaround. What finally helped us was to call first thing in the morning and get the names and ID numbers of all the people we talked to, and after a couple rounds of this they sent a written notice that we could cite when- surprise!- the collections dept. mailed us a letter the next week and we had to call them and go through the same thing again. And again. But it's a serious pain in the, ah, fireplace.
Thanks, Jane Dark. I'm a member of several online allergy support groups, but that requires having time to be online reading all the messages and posting. Time which I don't have at the moment.
So I check in when I can, especially on the dephi forums corn avoidance group. I may go to a monthly meeting that's held (sort of) locally at some point and at least see what it's like.
There are a few othe parents of allergic kids (not corn, but stuff like peanuts and milk) in my church. I actually found talking to them about it more depressing. They pretty much told me they'd given up on trying to find things to cook, and they just feed their families chicken and rice at every meal and never go anywhere.
One vote here for ppb in bureaucratic hell. And for all the nipple, dissertation, allergy, and...well, all the whines, really.
What a smart group of whiners, we are - what with all these dissertations?
I stopped after my Masters degree. My dad's a professor and I saw first hand how hard it would be to combine babies and a doctorate and I picked babies...(Although there will always be a tiny little part of me that wonders what would have happened if I had tried both...)
Good luck to all those experiencing the stress of academia.
PK, your despair is not ridiculous. You are coping with so much. The research and cooking-from-scratch you've been doing could exhaust two people! If you are feeling tired out today, it is entirely reasonable. Give yourself a break, and if you can get E. to nap, I hope you can rest too. Feed the kids whatever they had for breakfast if you can get away with it.
Hope this isn't too preachy. I'm just so sorry to hear you blaming yourself for feeling down.
I have a tax whine too, though hopefully smaller. I am being audited, except that this being the Polite White North they call it a "review." So I have to photocopy lots of things to mail in, and I just now looked and the child care receipts they want are not in the folder. Hunh? Need to hunt those down. Argh! I thought this would be just a matter of slaving over a copier in some copy shop, but apparently not. There will be hunting through piles of paper involved, and maybe an email to the tax preparer. And maybe multiple calls and driving around to get duplicate receipts.
Well, since I'm sitting here holding a sleeping baby who wakes up screaming if I put her dowm, while the other kids are happily (and noisily) playing Polly Pocket . . . I thought of a way to take a little break and hopefully save whatever is left of my sanity.
Anyone want to play a game of Settlers of Catan? http://www.settlers.servegame.co.../
non_ladder.php
Look for the Blogging Pixies game.
My whine: I'm trying to buy my parents' house. They have finally gotten divorced after 20 years of being separated. But my mom has so much fireplacing junk she can't get moved out, and the bank won't appraise the house because it's such a pigsty. So no mortgage for me. I can't request my time off to clean and paint, etc. (in hopes of whooing bank) because I have no idea when mom will get out. We'll probably end up having to move in a blizzard by the time this all comes together.
And I'm really tired. And I need chocolate, but I don't have any ones or change to feed the evil vending machine.
Kate, go to Disney World. They rent double strollers there. Truly. Go.
Even if all you do while you're there is laze by the pool, go.
Spend your mornings in the Magic Kingdom, your kids will love Toontown and Fantasy Land. There are lots of playgrounds there. Eat lunch, then go back to the hotel for a long afternoon nap. See if you can get a suite so that you can do your email and read while they're napping.
Just go.
And I vote for any one in academic despair and for PK.
Thank for playing Settlers of Catan, Lucy (I think it was lucy? I'm not good with names). I closed another window and that one shut down, too.
Congrats on your win!
Now I'm going to go feed my older girls sandwiches (they can have the bread) and myself and Baby E leftover chicken and sauteed veggies.
Yep, it was me. Thanks for the game, PK! And votes for your food allergy woes. My brothers and I were allergic to dairy products when *everything* had dairy in it. I hope things get easier for you, too.
Scrivener--in case you come back to read this far down, I'm mostly sad about your quitting the diss because it means you won't be coming back to Manhattan to do dissertation stuff! But maybe this is the right decision. I think you sound like someone who would like teaching high school, so maybe that's a good idea.
Ok, so my new whine tonight is that I bought Matt a new board game for his birthday, and it totally sucks. Tonight we decided to play with our awesome upstairs neighbors, because they make everything more fun, but it still sucked.
I buy my husband sucky presents. Boo.
Anti-whine: I also went to a surprise party tonight at a fancy hotel/bar, and there was FREE UNLIMITED DRINKS. Seriously. Oh, they were good, too, the fancy frou frou kind. Yay!
Whine: Baby Blue's meal plan today? Potato chips and pretzels. I wish I was kidding. At one point I think she mouthed a spoon that had (enriched) yogurt on it.
Further whine: I've been tearing my hair out because she's been absolutely refusing to drink any milk out of a cup. We've tried any number of tricks without any success at all. I couldn't figure it out -- a few weeks ago, she was at least drinking some milk from a cup.
Anti-whine: today when she told me that she didn't like her milk in a cup, it finally hit me. I'd started out giving her soymilk with melted vanilla ice cream because that was all we had in the house. But after a trip or two to the grocery store, we began giving her whole milk mixed with cream.
Duh. She doesn't LIKE whole milk, with or without cream. But she just drank two or three ounces of the soymilk and vanilla ice cream that I just got her.
Duh. Double duh.
Thanks so much for the kind words, everyone. I think we're surviving the day. It's nice to have someplace to whine today, and such a nice group of supportive pixies.
I did get the kitchen floor swept, sort of, anyway. I am now going to attempt to put Baby E down for another nap.
Woohoo! It's Wednesday and I have a legitmate whine.
Two days ago I was clandestinely (how do you spell it?) pulled aside by not one but two bosses. They told me a new position was being created and they wanted me for it. This position has more responsiblity, but still a part-time status and TWICE the money I make now. We could make it from paycheck to paycheck maybe, not just paycheck to jesus three days til we are paid, who has tooth fairy money. So I say "Yes!" They met with the executive committee this a.m. and one stinking member wants us to post it, and post it nationwide. ARGH. So I have to interview for a job I have been promised. A job that was created for me. A job which I may not get. SIGH. And then there is that whole saving face thing and not getting and going back to my old job, which I was perfectly happy doing- until THEY TOLD ME I HAD THIS ONE.
And no, the job is not for writing run-on sentences, or you know I would have that puppy nailed.
Phantom, isn't figuring out Baby Blue's eating habits worth a Ph.D. in something already?
Those with academic whines, I hear you. At least where I live, though, there are college teaching jobs for those of us who don't write/finish dissertations, and they aren't all bad. I know we lecturers are supposed to be miserable, but the flexibility I have to lighten my teaching load when family concerns are pressing is worth a lot to me. It's not for everyone, but it *is* an option that works well for some of us.
I was going to whine about being tired, but then I had a really good class today, and now I'm not! tired! Just happy.
Am I allowed to whine about my fall that happened on Monday night since I am still in pain? Or does that break the rules?
I'm achy all over and can hardly move! And I still have to come to work! Sitting all day is not helping because when I actually have to move I'm in so much pain that I am limping around the office. This just stinks stinks stinks.
Halloweenlover, of course you're allowed to whine about it. Whine away.
Votes to PK, Alissa, and Scrivener.
Phantom, have you tried getting Baby Blue one of those baseball hats with the beer can holders and straws? You could stick a milkshake in each side. Perhaps the novelty would agree with her?
Plus, it would be really cute.
No whines for me this week, other than that I haven't taught courses four days in a row for awhile, and it's kind of kicking my ass, preparation wise.
trillwing--love the milk bong idea!
I'm checking back in to vote tonight. I don't know--Allison's separating nipples sound pretty bad. And, for PK and her family in the food maze.
And I forgot to say earlier that I'm very happy that Puppy and LG have been reunited.
Oh, the nipples! Been there, gave up the nursing. You are brave, Allison, and I commend you.
And I vote for you.
Phantom, I am feeding my growth-spurting daughter Nutella on a digestive as a bedtime snack, alongside a glass of milk. Do you suppose Baby Blue could go for a combination of that sort, the Milk-and-Cookies approach to milk?
Allison, I had the nasty thrush at this time last year. What ended it for me was treating the little guy with topical liquidy prescription stuff (I can't remember the name) while using nipple cream AND--this was what finally killed it off--taking FOURTEEN DAYS of antibiotics.
After that, nursing still hurt because I think irreparable damage had been done to the nipples, but the broken glass feeling went away.
Oh, Songbird. If I could ever get her to eat more than a quarter of a cookie in a 72-hour period, that would work for us.
Sigh.
Voting for the nipples and anyone mired in bureaucratic crap. (Does that apply to dissertations, too?)
liz, on second and third thoughts, WDW would be really expensive, even though our accomdations (i.e. Taxman's room) would be paid for. Don't think the firm would chip in for airline tickets, kosher meals, and lots of Valium (for me). We should be putting that cash towards a padded cell, which is what I might need after a Newly! Added! November! Trip! (Partnership track: the good, the bad, the very, very ugly.)
I forgot to say earlier that I am very happy for LG and Puppy. My stepdad once turned the car around somewhere in Connecticut to go in search of my beloved stuffed seal, who had been left behind at a meal stop.
Separatist nipples, aarrrgggghhh! Sometimes the blog, it is birth control for me. Votes for Allison!!!!
Two small whines from me:
1) Having great difficulty finding a job right now. Apparently, having a law degree, but not a law license in my area, makes me overqualified to be law clerk/paralegal/legal secretary/law firm courier-gopher, but obviously not qualified enough to be an attorney. I even had a temp agency that only places people in legal jobs tell me that. Plan B really is starting to look like the wonderful world of retail (and just in time for the holidays, too). The February bar exam can't come soon enough.
2) I have had it with my neighbors across the hall (I live in a condo development that was formerly apartments). They're European, I think, so perhaps they're not used to living in a development with other people like this. But they are HORRIBLE neighbors. They slam their door so hard every time they enter or leave I have to adjust all my pictures on the wall - and they come and go a lot. They play their stereo system so loud at all hours of the day, and especially at night. Usually between the hours of 10:30 p.m. and 4 am. I can hear it over my tv and air conditioner, from across the hall! They sit in the common areas smoking, talking loudly so that I can hear them, and then throw their cigarette butts, and other garbage, all over the steps. And they use my trash receptacle outside my unit to throw out their nasty trash (why, I have no idea).
Antiwhine: My condo manager promised that he would address the issues with them and that if they chose to keep up this behavior, they would be fined 100 dollars a day, and eventually, could be evicted if they are renters.
What if the milk were in a lovely, lovely sippy cup without the lid, and the cookie being scientifically dipped into it to see what happens?
If only this were as easy as finding Puppy.
Separating nipples - just ew. I'll vote for anything as long as everyone's nipples get better.
By the way, I know I don't have tetanus because I got vaccinated a few years ago. But Web MD was going to diagnose me with everything from Parkinson's to the moon before it suggested a normal cold-type virus.
Additional just-under-the-wire whine (more like a question): I just got a new form of birth control today that requires me to keep it in the refrigerator. Do I label it with my name, so that my housemates aren't taken unawares by random birth control? Or do I leave it unmarked and risk the awkward question on the kitchen whiteboard, "Hey! Whose contraception in the fridge?"
Hm. This reminds me of my whine a few months ago about keeping typhoid vaccine in the fridge. Why do I repeatedly require a personal medical icebox?
Late whine, in teh form of a haiku:
Book Reviews are due
Tomorrow. I am all out
Of adjectives. Help!
A vote for separated nipples here, too. Ouch. I know that one from experience.
And dissertations. That's something I've never experienced, but it sounds painful.
Kermit, from personal experience I say label it with your name. This summer we were staying with my sister's family, and despit having a paper bag marked "personal" shoved back behind the artichoke hearts, I still got "Hey Jen, is this yours?" from my (very creepy) brother-in-law. Gross!
late vote for HL! A pregnant fall!
This is a very late Thursday AM vote, but PK, I admire you so much for keeping your fireplacin' sanity amid all those allergy woes!
All this dissertation talk is compounding my job angst. Good to hear, but academia really scares the fireplace out of me sometimes.
Alissa definitely gets my mold-sisters vote. Nothing worse than finding out what's been lurking behind your walls!
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