DeMediacratic Nation
I Got What America Needs Right Here
By Jimmy Carter
January 9, 2008 |
The Onion Issue 44•02
Sometimes I’m a little stupid, maybe, a little slow in the head, so I’m wondering if you can help me get something straight. Maybe you can help me understand one fucking thing right now, America, and explain to me what in the Christ is going on here. ‘Cause, unless I’m missing something, this country is in the middle of a motherfucking shitstorm, and I have no fucking idea what you’re gonna do to get out of it. I mean, are you seriously considering voting for one of these shitbags you got here in ‘08? Fat fucking chance.
Way I see it, America needs a president who’s gonna somehow un-royally screw up the Middle East, do some serious cleaning up after you dropped your pants and took a steaming dump all over the fucking environment, and—boom!—restore dignity, honor, and all that shit to these United States.
See, I got solutions to all your problems—I got ‘em right here in my big, hairy ballsack.
You better get down on your hands and knees and kiss Jimmy Carter’s rosy-red Georgia-peach-picking ass and beg me to run your fucking country again, because there’s no way I’m ever gonna come to you fuck-knobs and politely ask you if I might please be a presidential candidate in your precious fuckin’ election. So you can just bite my cock. I’ve had it with you jerkoffs and your jerkoff candidates.
You actually seem to think one a’ these assholes is gonna prance in and wave a magic wand and make everything all nice again. Look at you, sitting there like a common fucking schnook and eating all their bull about bi-fucking-partisanship, and how they have all the goddamn answers. Let me tell you something: These fags are dogshit compared to Jimmy fucking Carter, all right? I was arbitrating Mideast crises when this bunch was still sucking on their mamas’ titties.
But who comes to me, huh? Fucking nobody. Why ask old Jimmy anything? What the fuck could he know about peace in the Middle East? It’s not like he fucking won the Nobel Peace Prize for that shit. You myopic pricks. Back in ‘79, I sat Sadat and Begin right down and made those two dicklicks shake hands. It was beautiful—I had all the pieces lined up and I smiled and waved in my best fucking suit and tie right there on TV. And what do you do, you pieces of shit? You screw the whole goddamn pooch.
Cocksuckers.
Oh, what’s that I hear? The weather’s all screwy? You got a global warming problem? Boo-fucking-hoo! I was telling you morons to turn off your lights and unplug all your shit at night to conserve energy in 19-fuckin’-75, for chrissake. Gee, I wonder what woulda happened if we’d all switched to solar power like I fucking did back when we had a fucking chance to do something about it. Think we’d still be sucking Saudi Arabia’s dick like a five-dollar whore? I sure as fuck didn’t get no fancy Oscar for that little spiel, though, did I? No. But Al Gore, that cum-sucking pig, steals the shit from me and no
Dear sir,
I belive in free speech, therefore I am going to share some with you. I tried to read your comment and understand what it is you are trying say. Alas, DeMediacratic Nation has many lady readers, and I happen to be one of them. As must people like to say (not all), 'change the channel' instead of telling me how rude I am. Bravo. You have disgusted me instead of creating a dialogue. Would you please try softer language the next time?
Trust me, I know how frustrating it is to have these borders wide open and our border patrol thrown in jail for doing their job or being murdered. I do. We will never solve anything, though, if we cannot discuss it.
Hey, DeMediacratic Nation! WE WON! NY GIANTS WON! 
GIANTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Nice Op Ed; makes no sense and is based upon some odd reality, very clear and concise. Next time use some of the space available and include thought in there. I can speak in expletive as well, but I find that after the first few words any point gets lost.
But I get where you're coming from you Liberal Fascist!!!
Maybe that is why I could not understand this incoherent thought? lol. Hi, Blandly Urbane. How have you been? I'm well. I know what you mean about those choice words. I can come up with some of my own. I choose not to, though. (Most of the time. lol) If I want to be treated as a lady, I must behave as such. 
Let’s not play dead and act like our country is NOT in danger of a Hillary/Obama ticket that would not be good for America in so many different ways, I couldn’t possibly mention them all here quickly.
If you STILL love America… if you STILL love the Conservative Movement, America, your children and your spouses, and Mitt’s message… then join with us to form a blog roll for a McCain/Romney ticket!
Please read my previous article entitled, “Why I think Gov. Mitt Romney Should Be John McCain’s V.P. Choice.”
Don’t give up the fight when we are almost there!
McCain/Romney 2008!
There seem to be very many pluses to picking Gov. Romney as John McCain’s V.P. running mate.
1)There is widespread agreement that if John McCain loses this year, Gov. Romney will run in 2012. If Gov. Romney were on the ticket as V.P. next in line for the GOP nod in 2016, Mr. McCain would not have too worry about whether Mr. Romney would work as hard as possible for a McCain/Romney win this year.
2)Governor Romney is very intelligent, and I think would be very comfortable dealing with foreign dignitaries.
3)Governor Romney is very rich and has a well-oiled fund-raising circuit that would be very beneficial to Mr. McCain.
4)Governor Romney would bring expertise to economic matters that Mr. McCain seems to be lacking.
5)Governor Romney would bring executive experience as a Governor to the ticket.
6)Governor Romney would bring almost all of his supporters to help with a McCain/Romney ticket, thereby assuring that his supporters aren’t trying to bring him attention to a potential 2012 run, nipping such conversation quickly, before it takes root and is hard to break apart.
7)Governor Romney appeals to social, economic and defense conservatives, bringing the whole Party and most of the Conservative Movement, including talk radio, on board with the ticket.
Romney supporters are very enthusiastic and dedicated. You cannot buy this kind of endearment, but McCain would be able to pick up his supporters, and their already-in-place organizational and other skills they would have to offer to the ticket.
9)Romney would help John McCain in purple states such as Michigan, Nevada and Minnesota, and could even put Massachusetts in place in November.
10)Governor Romney brings all the necessary ingredients to John McCain’s campaign that he so desperately needs against Hillary, and especially an Obama opponent.
You cannot buy loyalty like Governor Romney has with his supporters. You have to EARN it. By giving Romney the nod for the V.P. slot, McCain would be showing the Conservative Movement in America that he will not abandon them in the future. If he does this, he will almost be unstoppable in the fall.
11)Governor Romney is now widely seen as heir next in line to be the GOP nominee if McCain were to be defeated, or if McCain served two terms,then 2116, if Romney stays in the game that long. The move to make Romney V.P. would silence many evangelical and social conse
Blandly - Shane here from Political Vindication. We recently interviewed Dave from Israellycool.com, he called in from Israel and we talked about his country and its future. This Tuesday we're going to play the interview for the first time in the second hour of our show. It's a passionate defense of Israel that you would find interesting and inspirational!
Hope to see you on Tuesday and hear your thoughts!
Shane
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