LM has GOT to put these stories in a book. 
I led a sheltered life growing up.
Imagining Bush and Putin together reminds me of Get Shorty, Gene Hackman as producer Harry Zimm and Dennis Farina as Ray 'Bones' Barboni. Zimm introduces himself in a long distance phone conversation —
Harry Zimm: Harry Zimm. The man happens to be a major Hollywood player.
Ray "Bones" Barboni: Never heard of him.
Harry Zimm: Maybe that's because you've never been out've fuckin' Miami, dipshit. Maybe it's time you got on a plane, flew out to L.A. and took a meeting with Mr. Zimm.
Mr Barboni follows up on Zimm's suggestion and it is a wonderful meeting, tough talk meets just plain tough.
Every real hard case I have ever met tried his best to avoid violance for no reason. And every whacked out rich kid was drawn to confrontation like a moth... Putin is scary but George Bush is much scarier because he has never seen the reprocussions. The White House is occupied by a deluded moron following the directions of twisted out Draft Dodger... neither should have been allowed within miles of the place.
Good piece as is usual from the Lower Guy...
But why do Americans have such a weakness, lately anyway, for guys like Bush? And he's never made one goddammed thing in his whole life come out right!
So maybe that's the new Horatio Alger type story; you attached yourself to a megalomaniac sociopath (is that redundant) get yours, and jumped clear in time!
If you didn't, of course, lose limbs or earn a jail sentence.
Dear Mr. Bush.
Just to clarify: I am not a spineless Democrat.
If you do not mess with me, I will not fuck your shit up.
Sincerely,
Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin
mooser, i am as mystified as you. it goes all the way back to high school for me, wondering why the bullshit cheerleader types (as bush was) got all the play, when all they were was a lot of cardboard.
it's because we like a good show more than we like the real thing, maybe. bush reminds me of every socialite C-student rich kid i went to high school with - the ones who didn't care about getting good grades because it was never going to matter.
perhaps america was confused by the show. last i checked though, two thirds of us are no longer confused.
For a while after getting busted up in a shipyard accident, I worked in a pretty rough bar in a beach town. Most of the troublemakers failed to realise that I had more allies in the place than they did. Posers seem to THINK they have allies because they are always buying the drinks. The REAL tough guys usually didn't make trouble because they needed a place to drink and do business. The posers on the other hand, seemed to have some sort of NEED to get their asses kicked now and then.
The PROBLEM with the posers in the above illustration is that when they get their shredded asses handed to them in a bucket, the rest of us poor fucks are going to go down WITH them.
When Bush called the ex head of the KGB "Pooty poot", I nearly lost my fucking lunch! Hey may have looked into Putin's eyes, but I'll guaran-goddamn-TEE you Putin got the measure of Bush right away!
Thanks for a great post. Looks like mixing it up with Drifty works out real well. Both of you are great thinkers and translate that to the written word.
got that shit right
His KGB career started in 1975, after the Andropov reforms.
He was posted to the First Chief Directorate.
That last ought to tell anybody who has studied the KGB all they need to know.
The First Chief Directorate was the smallest of the Chief Directorates, the most prestigious, and the one most choosy about personnel. Since they were charged with the foreign intelligence targets, they also had the highest priority.
The First Chief Directorate was the KGB elite.
And Andropov had already re-made the KGB into the least internally corrupt organization in the Soviet Union. Andropov is probably burning in the same place in Hell they put "Iron Feliks" Dzerzhinsky, who learned his trade serving time in Czarist prison camps in Siberia.
DO NOT fool around with a guy like Putin. You'ld be better off trying to pet a rattlesnake.
LM,
When I was reading this I thought of what Powell said when Bush said he saw the soul of Putin.
Powell said "He saw the KGB."
The kid is clueless!
Sonic, thanks for starting this off. Thanks to everyone else for the insightful comments.
Now we can just worry and wait.
‘Judo is characterized by the indirect application of force to defeat an opponent ... and using one's opponent's strength against him, and adapting well to changing circumstances.’ (from Wikipedia)
Putin is doubtless versed in the ‘wet’ aspects of statecraft. He’s also a lifelong practitioner of judo, and holds a sixth-degree black belt.
One more thing. Drifty's article made wonder about how many us leaders Ahmadinejad would outlive.
It's a good thing that a military strike on Iran is less likely. But for the next fifteen months we're dependant on someone as evil as Putin to keep Bush and Cheney in check? This is a bad thing. We are fucked.
/delurk
Oh shit. The fool is trying to step up...
http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20071.../
iran_bush_dc_2
I grew up with the goddamn cold war. I don't need to live through another one.
Impeach these idiots NOW.
/relurk
Yeah, Putin is a patient, patient man. Putin is KGB, the real deal.
We have a putz that plays at dictator. Putin's the real deal.
Great essay. Thanks!
Gotta agree with everything you said about the difference between the two.
The Bushes always killed you with a smear, or a word to the right connected person, or with legal papers, or their money. The effete way to do it. The "I'll ruin you method.
Putin would do it the way "Matrix" (from "Commando") would: Come on, Bennett, throw away that chicken-shit gun. You don't just want to pull a trigger. Put the knife in me and look me in the eye and see what's going on in there when you turn it.
That's the I will kill you method.
Yeah. I think that highlights the difference nicely.
Mooser, I don't think it's a BIG weakness for them. Remember, more than half-a-million americans voted for Gore than voted for Bush.
And Kerry did the "short-arm me NOW, you big bitch!" when he ran, and bent over and spread his cheeks for the wingers.
This time, we've got nearly 13 months left for one of the candidates to grow a spinal column and start raising some hell about this shit.
And I'm not counting on Hillary for anything.
6-8 months from now, whether she wins the nomination or not, she'll be political roadkill, and Iraq will be the tractor-trailer rig that will flatten her, just like it's going to flatten the republicans, if the dems are smart enough to nominate either Edwards or Obama. Or even Gore, if he runs.
Put it this way, regarding Hillary:
Given the choice between republican and republican lite, ESPECIALLY with Clinton as the "lite", the people who put george bush within a SCOTUS decision of the white house will have so much help from the conservative democrats and independents who will turn out to keep Hillary OUT of the white house, that we will probably lose not only the presidency, but both houses of congress, as well.
point taken regarding the difference between real life and acting, but I'm saddened you had to drag Tupac into it.
Yes to all of the above, and amplification: IIRC, Condoleza Rice is a student of the history of the Soviet Union and the Eastern Bloc countries. If the Deciderer has such an expert at his side, then why are they making such stupid fucking mistakes w/r/t the Caspian region?
And the lust for oil can't be the only reason they're screwing the pooch on this.
Well put.
I too shuddered when I heard that the President of the U. S. of f*cking A. called the chief executive of Russia "Pootie Poot."
And it's not like the dumb son of a bitch just fell off the turnip truck; his own father was head of the CIA and Ambassador to China, among other things.
No, this was some major-league batshittery. So stupid or arrogant, or both, that it makes me wonder if Putin's furrowed brow is having any impact inside The Bubble at all. He snubbed Rice (and Gates!) yesterday by letting them cool their heels for 45 minutes waiting for him. Then he flew to Teheran, to shake hands with Achmedinidschad? Jumping Judas Iscariot. Short of a demonstration nuke off Long Island, what's the guy got to do to reach the dimwits in Washington?
God preserve us. I'm reasonably certain the ex-KGB won't be doing it. And I wonder about my nation's elected leadership.
I wonder about my nation's elected leadership.
Really?
What do you wonder about?
Frankly, I think it's all pretty damn clear.
Except, "Leadership." I do not think that word means what you think it means.
Putin bombed apartment buildings in his own capital, blamed the Chechens, and put the bullet in the head of one journalist investigating it and poisoned another investigator with polonium for him to die in front of the cameras of the world. Putin knew he could do that for the same reason he knew Bush was a poser.
Putin cut his political teeth on flattening Grozny while making the world look the other way. Chechens are considered born gangsters themselves and Putin went in there and committed a terror war not well known or fully explained then or now. The Chechens responded by taking a theater hostage and then a school, both with very bad results at the end. You can imagine the response in Chechnya, but then again Putin made sure journalists weren't about when he wanted the real shit to go down.
This is the true example of what people mean when they say that Bush is playing checkers while Putin and China are playing chess. Bush meanders about in a drunken haze saying stupid and unintelligible things while Putin has already planned his next 3 steps in every direction, because unlike Bush he is not expecting anyone else to bail him out if the shit blows up.
Putin laughed when Karimov came home to Moscow and bounced the US out of Uzbekistan, and he already has plans on who will fit nicely into his plans in Kiev and Tbilisi. While Bush throws money at these leaders to corrupt them over to the US side, just like the guys buying drinks as was said above, Putin has guys on the ground pressing at all the leverage points of power, cause he knows them and Bush doesn't.
Putin is everything the neocons wished they could be. Asserting power over neighboring states, actually winning a war against insurgents, and exerting a lasting power in his country, both personally and through his party.
Does any of this sound familiar? These are all the fantasies the fuckwits known as modern conservatives have been frantically masturbating over for years, and here's the man who was able to do these things.
Putin bombed apartment buildings in his own capital, blamed the Chechens, and put the bullet in the head of one journalist investigating it and poisoned another investigator with polonium for him to die in front of the cameras of the world. Putin knew he could do that for the same reason he knew Bush was a poser.I don't think that Putin himself had Anna Politkovskaya or Alexander Litvinenko killed. He and his people are subtler than that.
Novaya Gazeta, the newspaper Politkovskaya wrote for, conducted its own investigation and concluded that she was probably killed on the orders of Chechen prime minister (and now president) Ramzan Kadyrov. She was reportedly investigating corruption and human rights abuses involving Kadyrov at the time of her death.
I'm glad I'm not the only one who freaked when that fucking coward called Putin Pooty-poot. I bet Putin was deeply insulted. I expected him to rip off chickengeorge's head and shit down his neck.
"...don't have the pedigree for it." -LM
Damn Skippy, LoLo! In the 'hood its called "lackin' the sac" for it.
Suge Knight = Vlad The Impaler Putin -what an image!
This is good advice for the posers but I don't expect them to take it. After all, the very essence of poserdom is that they believe their own hype.
When Bush said he saw a "soul mate" in Putin's eyes, that's what he meant. He saw a genuine bad ass and thought "the man is just like me, because I am a bad ass too!"
IIRC, Condoleza Rice is a student of the history of the Soviet Union and the Eastern Bloc countries. If the Deciderer has such an expert at his side, then why are they making such stupid fucking mistakes w/r/t the Caspian region?
And the lust for oil can't be the only reason they're screwing the pooch on this.
If you make the assumption that they aren't mis-steps but rather intended to achieve a set of results, it makes more sense.
The GWOT may not be enough to ensure the defense and security industry costs remain high and profitable for suppliers.
A new Cold War, however, would require increasing spending on new weapons systems and would make it easier to impose a security state.
The truism remains, that it's a mistake to attribute to malice that which can be explained by stupidity. But the evidence for stupidity is pretty thin these days.
Gag,
Kadyrov accuses Berezovsky.
Politkovskaya’s Colleagues Criticize Kadyrov for Accusing Berezovsky of Recent Murders
Publication time: 2 March 2007, 23:01
http://www.kavkazcenter.com/eng/...3/02/
7608.shtml
Colleagues of murdered Russian journalist Anna Politkovskaya have criticised Chechen leader Ramzan Kadyrov's claim that exiled Russian tycoon Boris Berezovsky ordered the killings of Anna Politkovskaya and former KGB spy Alexander Litvinenko, the Reporters Without Borders watchdog reports.
Kadyrov claimed that he was personally present at meetings at which Berezovsky compromised himself and that Berezovsky, aided by Litvinenko, had financed Chechen separatist fighters with the aim of destroying Russia.
In response to that Politkovskaya`s newspaper Novaya Gazeta has published an article by Viacheslav Izmayilov saying Kadyrov should go to the police with his information and pointing out that others close to the Russian government have also tried to put the blame on Berezovsky.
Izmayilov said he knew who had made a statement accusing Berezovsky - an individual known as "Pirate" who has been involved in hostage-trafficking in Chechnya and who is under pressure from the secret services. Izmayilov said Berezovsky was not one of the instigators of this trade and both the Russian interior ministry and the security service were in a position to know this.
Both interior ministry and FSB agents have been present at handovers of hostages in exchange for ransom, playing the role of "bag carriers," Izmayilov added.
Putin is doubtless versed in the ‘wet’ aspects of statecraft. He’s also a lifelong practitioner of judo, and holds a sixth-degree black belt.
Also the Russian version of judo, known as "sombo" (in sombo, the players wear jackets designed to offer better grips for holds and throws).
Just think...Putin has been playing Bush all these years...
Bravo!
Beautifully written, masterfully summarized, and closing with an indelible image.
It's like freakin' haiku, only with more words.
"When Bush called the ex head of the KGB "Pooty poot", I nearly lost my fucking lunch! Hey may have looked into Putin's eyes, but I'll guaran-goddamn-TEE you Putin got the measure of Bush right away!..."
Mr. Natural
-When I heard about it, it just reinforced my belief that Dubya is a fucking idiot.
Admiral K,
Yes a fucking idiot, but there is more. I strongly suspect, the belittling had a message. In what passes for Bush's brain, he "thought" to himself "Putin may be tough, but I can still put him in his place and maybe he will feel less certain of himself".
Periwinkle -
Your point certaintly does have merit, if you know GW Bush's past behavior.
He likes to bestow nicknames or pet names on people - whether close or not, because he's been entitled all his life and it is a mark of power to do so.
And as others have noted, Putin is not someone you bestow a cutesy nickname. Of course, Bush, being the ignorant person he is, disregards such advice.
if I was going to be the next President of the US, the first four things I would do would be:
1) Write the State of the Union speech, which will start 'The State of the Union is completely, utterly fucked' and go on from there.
2) ask the JCOS to work out the best-option withdrawal plan from Iraq
3) do a multi-country tour to personally establish relations with other heads of state
4) write Vladimir Putin a 'I apologize for the previous wanker's disrespect to a head of state' letter.
We need to start building up again, and Bush is all about burning down.
For all of Ms. Rice's supposed knowledge about Russia and Soviet history, I really wonder how much she actually knows. The woman has played the role of "bright little girl" for so long I think she's never had to deal with actually having to be competent. Sort of like Bush, in that matter.
One question I have--in her meeting with Vladimir Putin, did she speak in Russian or was the meeting held in English?
And when "Pootie-Poot" looked into Bush's eyes, he said to himself: "I've broken many boys like you. But I will smile now and shake your hand. You will regret it later."
Ouch, double ouch,
Me thinks the BEAR is stepping up to the table, and he is thinking that Afganistan broke us and it's only fair that Iraq breaks you.
In the meantime China is sitting back building her game plan.
You nailed it about this hype-foreign policy of wanna-bees. This policy of myth rather than the hard reality of sustainable logistics is just an extension of all that ails this society and culture. The bubble burst of speculative dogma, not based on any credible fundamentals.
But like the pop song, "All she wants to do is dance", that is the cultural capability before and NOW. Bsh and Cheney are left with just their dicks as their weapons.
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