Jen,
I'm with ya on the pads. Two years ago I went through nearly exactly what you're going through and going back to pads was just... so... awful. But, there's very little diff between the "bleeding like a stuck pig" options you mentioned, so go with what seems comfy.
Good that you have that good gyn... they're worth their weight in gold.
About that dickweed who drove you home, I'd complain mightily IN WRITING to the people who hire him to bring women home. He sounds like a stalker, a concern troll of the worst type. I'd get out of the car before going another block with jerk like that...
hang in there lady, and thanks for the great veggie pics. I'm about to head out to the farmer's market right now...
Veggies report, spectacular. Gyn report, seems like an improvement, but painful.
Driver, asshole. No report on work so I hope all is well or at least not a torture there. Health and happiness to you and feel better soon. I await the next installment of The Veggie Files.
Jen--
I was divorced when my son was 3 1/2 and my daughter was 21 months old. I was, and still am, an adjunct college English instructor at a large state university.
While my children were still in the home, I also ran a home dayare for 55 hours a week, so that I, rather than some other woman, could be the one who raised my own children. I hired a regular substitute sitter for the 12 hours a week that I was in class, and I held office hours during the two weekday evenings and on the alternating weekends that my kids were at their dad's. The daycare ended the August my daughter left for college.
During those 18 years, I had to prepare and clean up after 5 meals a day (three main meals and two healthy snacks) for 6 to 12 children at a time. Burnt out doesn't even begin to describe how I felt about cooking (and cleaning up after cooking and feeding a small army) after those 18 years. Now that I live alone, I hate to cook or clean up after preparing and cooking food.
But I absolutely love real food--I am a second-generation Sicilian-American, and really delicious home-cooked food is part of my heritage.
Since I don't cook much--mostly I eat what can be eaten without cooking or that can be microwaved--I seriously miss real food--not enough to prepare it or clean up afterward, but still, the pangs of nostalgia and regret are there.
Your food posts are like window shopping (or maybe some sort of food porn) for me. I drool over the pictures, daydream about the dishes you prepare, and wish I had someone like you to think up and prepare delicious meals for me with gorgeous, fresh produce.
Every time I come to the GNB and find your trademark magenta font, my mouth almost immediately begins to water.
I just thought you might like to know how much your food posts are appreciated--even by someone who isn't going to cook anything like what you prepare.
Speaking as a man, a liberal and a feminist, let me just say:
All women everywhere MUST have unfettered access to all health care services - including abortion on demand without having to give a reason, and without having to report to a governmental agency.
There is NO debate. Either women are equal citizens, or are they are merely chattel. I vote for equal citizens.
The life of a grown woman far outweighs a clump of cells that may or may not even be born alive. Having lived through two stillbirths with my wife, I can say that not every fetus lives, even when they are wanted.
Abortion, on demand, without apology. Anything else is akin to slavery.
BTW, the light magenta on the beige background is very hard to read, I usually don't read this at all, but the 'side of Gyn' persuaded me to suffer through it.
Also, our CSA has almost been drowned out of existence by the months of rain we've had up here in the NE USA.
when you have ultra fresh, still crispy pepper leaves be sure to toss them with the rest of your salad. or, treat them like any other green. they're delicious.
i agree with the folks who suggested a report of the driver. it doesn't have to be anything other than "this is what that dude said" type of thing. it's disturbing on many levels.
i come from a very conservative place in this debate. i see no vested interest for either myself, or the state, when a woman visits her doctor. for any reason at all. how, folks who style themselves as "small government" advocates can countenance this level of government intrusion is simply beyond me.
but, i'm already a documented attitude case.
my very best wishes for you continuing recovery.
ultra fresh, made right there, pesto is one of the sublime things of a good life. when it's piñon season on the rez, i go apeshit. making pasta, pounding pesto (yes, i'm a reactionary luddite, i do it in a ceramic mortar bowl, with a wooden pestle) to my heart's content.
do not ever feel shy about adjusting proportions, or switching out ingredients with these kind of things. sometimes it will work, sometimes it won't, now and then, it will be sublime.
All,
Thank you so much, and special thanks to Jesse for getting this up this weekend. I originally typed it out late Friday but knew that Jesse is on the road dealing with the trip to CO.
RE the driver--the disturbing thing is that guy is a FRIEND of mine, not a shill hired by the office (we took a cab home).
I remember one thing he actually said--"Jen--I consider myself a feminist--I believe that women are 100% equal to men and are full human beings."
Well, THAT'S big of you pal! WOW, that REALLY sets the bar HIGH as a standard, doesn't it!
It's sad because it's always been a strain on our friendship and one thing that he ALWAYS insists on doing is winning these stupid tautological little arguments.
Minstrel Boy--I actually have an antique apothecary mortar and pestle. Imagine the ones you see in old pharmacy ads--solid brass and HEAVY--pestle is at least 4-5 lbs. It's a family piece; my great-grandmother brought it over as one of her few worldly posessions from Russia. It has been in active kitchen use for (according to at least one person who has looked at it) since around the Civil War or probably much earlier (1830s was one guess). It had been used to pound walnuts for Passover nusstorte, and now I really SHOULD start using it for pesto. Thanks for the reminder.
Oh, and Comerade Rutherford--what state are you in? So far the only real damage we've had (Cayuga area farm for downstate CSA) has been that the strawberry crop was ruint and the berries are meager this year...
the thing that using the mortar and pestle brings is a delightful variance to the consistency of a pesto sauce. in the blender everything is smoothed, and uniformly sized and it becomes very saucy. not a bad thing. but when there are things like basil leaves and pine nuts and garlic, every now and then with a hand sauce you'll get a little bit of a larger nubbin of something, and in one delightful bit you'll get a little voice that shouts "garlic" or "basil" or "pine" on it's way down your throat.
i love that little bit of suprise. i am a big consistency fiend. that's why i always insist on whipping souffles and angel cakes by hand. or mooshing the pasta dough with my hands, it turns out better. at times though, the consistency i desire is a bit more random and rough.
it is so very charming when folks feel compelled to let us know that we are "really human beings" and "equal in all ways" in their eyes isn't it? lord, lord, lord, it makes my half breed heart "soar like a goddamned eagle and shit" when i hear that. usually though those kinds of pronouncements are either right before, or right after an action or other pronouncement that gives lie to those noble sentiments.
still, he's a friend that was there to give what help he could at the time you needed it. that speaks well for him. we'll give him a pass and tease him for his earnestness later. gently tease only. after all white folks can be mighty touchy.
p.s. i would wonder about the reaction line in the brass when introduced to things like lemon juice and such. but, by all means, give it a pound or two. can't hurt a thing.
(i believe that old tools actually might experience things akin to satisfaction when we use them. it's not something provable as true, but it makes me happy to think so.)
Just got back from farmer's market -- fresh tomatoes, fresh basil, cukes -- yeah, we're having gazpacho this week!
Feel better, dear heart, and thank you for the recipes - publish them!!
I recently came up with a variant on the basic pesto formula:
Sweet basil leaves
Rosemary leaves (about 1/2 as much a the basil)
Almonds
Olive oil
Garlic
Throw it all into a chopper and spin it down to a paste. I eyeballed all the quantities with the exception of the basil/rosemary ratio, and it was grand on pork chops.
Re: Ur-Moron driver guy's assertion that abortion as a debate has been made redundant by technology... I'd counter with a technological solution put forth in one of my favorite books The SCUM Manefesto.
It is now technically feasible to reproduce without the aid of males (or, for that matter, females) and to produce only females. We must begin immediately to do so. Retaining the male has not even the dubious purpose of reproduction.
Problem Solved via technology.
Feel better post D&C.
Been there on the fibroids from hell, but mine are part of the uterine wall. So, D&C won't help. Hysterectomy will, but there are some obvious downsides to that. My gynecologist and I are doing the "watchful waiting" and hope things stablize over time and endless birth control pills (which have helped quite a bit, but things are still a tad weird). The goal? Menopause without surgery.
May the D&C take care of the gynocological ick.
And yeah, F&ck the anti-choice men. I'm a dyke on the pill because of health issues. And now the Bushies want to screw with my access to basic health care???
Screw them and the horse they rode in on.
It is a RIGHT for a woman to have complete control over her own body, a RIGHT not open to discussion or debate.
Like Minstrel Hussain Boy I love me the old fashioned mortar and pestle. Unfortunately, I just don't use them as much as I should.
Jen, brat - In '04 I had a myomectomy. OB/GYN took out 10 fibroids. Of course they came back. Since I'm 46, I'm not too far away from menopause anyway.
Aquarius40, Jen:
Well, I'm 45 and my gyno predicts at least 5 more years of this given when my mom hit menopause.
Watching my partner battle a rare form of endometrial cancer, and then the 2 subsequent surgical fixes to the original surgery has made me a tad relunctant to go under the knife, particularly for elective surgery--at least at this point.
My partner, btw, is 7 years cancer free. We're very, very lucky.
I started on the pill at age 40. For a while, I was sure I'd lose my lesbian membership card (*GRIN!*). I've been fairly lucky on the pill at this late age. My blood pressure is up just a bit, as is my weight. 10 points, 10 pounds. Nothing too startling.
But yeah, the gynological funkiness is just a trip. It's like adolescence never ended some days....
Abortion is legal throughout the US, but funny how in a lot of states it's somehow damn near impossible to get one. In some states you can't even get birth control if the only pharmacist in three counties thinks it's unChristian to dispense it.
A lot of people are like that friend who'll give you a lift to the ob-gyn, and they probably even voted for non-conservative Democrats, and feel the war was won in 1973 and nothing more need to be done. Which is why Roe v Wade has been almost weaseled out of existence. It's not really a right if one can't exercise it. We seem to have a lot of rights like that lately.
The battle may stop but it never ends. You'll lose if you forget that, because the other side won't.
Anyway, congrats on getting the new ob-gyn, who's taking things seriously enough to have found that it's not as serious as you feared.
I have a wooden mortar and pestle that I use for dried herbs and spices. What else?
Wouldn't removing enough endometrium to stop your periods also have an hormonal effect? They don't always tell you so, but some of the hormones your body needs come from the uterus. (I know this because I had a simple hysterectomy at the age of 24 -- retaining my ovaries was not sufficient for everything, though I didn't hit menopause until age 40.)
Oh, and you asked about arguments for choice. Here's a weird one: If you want me to make the moral choice to not have an abortion, so that I can be moral, then you have to let me have the choice. If you don't give me the choice of whether or not to do it, I accrue no "morality points" because I didn't make the decision myself.
Another weird one: "Oh, so you don't believe that there is such a thing as a 'fate worse than death'? If you think that death is the very worst thing of all, doesn't that mean you don't have much faith in God or heaven?"
Or, you could tell them the old German fairy tale about the baby who, just before it was born, was visited by an angel who offered it fame, fortune or death. The story goes through each of the first two choices, and then the baby asks the angel, "Which is the best choice to make?" and the angel suggests death is best. I kid you not, this is a traditional tale. I don't remember the name of it, but I remember the picture. The author was Anderson or Grimm -- I don't remember but it was one of them, I'm pretty sure.
For anyone fighting a health battle......blessings.
Jen, thoughts and prayers are with you.
And TBlue--You're very welcome; it's knowing that I am helping other folks Get Their Foodie On that makes this worth it. :D
Feel better soon, Jen. Glad to hear new Ob-Gyn is far better.
Reading this reminded me of my doctor's comment when it was decided I desperately needed a hysterectomy. "You may find yourself feeling less feminine when you don't get periods any more." I think he thought I was nuts because I started laughing -really laughing because how can bleeding 3 weeks out of 4, as it was by then, make you feel anything but gross? I wanted to tell him that I didn't measure my femininity by my ability to discard eggs but decided laughter was better for me.
Re the pads -yes, yuck but I've got to sing my daughters praises here. She is really into environmental issues and made what I consider a momentous decision. She has given up all pads, tampons etc for this mooncup idea. Last time she visited she showed it to me, explained all about it and I tell you I'm in awe. She got a hell of a kick explaining something to her mum about the benefits but even if I had the damn monthly things I'm not sure I could have used it...
'Tain't nobody's business what doctors and patients discuss or do regarding each individuals' personally owned and privatly operated body. So that pretty much ends the abortion debate in my view. All these nosey nellies need to start looking in the mirror to discover what their control freak problem is.
Glad you're through that portion of the program, Jen. Really glad you found another doctor who had a better plan than making you suffer and doing nothing helpful. I hope this get things back on track for you. 
I'm not a cook either but do enjoy your foodie posts and great photos! I've gotten 3 homegrown tomatoes offa my plants out back. Two more, the biggest ones, in a few more days. Good stuff!
Aw, yes, finding a good ob/gyn is 3/4 of the fight (and they are worth their weight in gold). Congrats on that.
I have a marble mortar and pestle, but it is used to grind up equine meds! It would undoubtedly do a good job on pine nuts, but I will pass on the 'essense of bute' that it would pass on to anything I eat! I do agree with Minstrel Boy on the texture thing, though, and I usually hold out a portion of both the basil leaves and the pine nuts, which I then coarsly chop with a knife and add back to the blended up paste, giving me that 'handmade' feel. A lot of times I will make a pesto sauce that just consists of the ingredients of pesto without the grinding - whole, toasted pine nuts, garlic, chopped basil and some olive oil. I do suggest toasting the pine nuts before pestoing - either in the oven or in a dry skillet over medium heat. Really makes the flavor pop.
I also bought fresh basil at the local farmer's market and made pesto with it. I tried toasting the pine nuts but it didn't seem to add anything. *shrugs* I used it in tortellini salad with olives and halved cherry tomatoes that I grew myself. I also picked up 5 lbs of *very* local beef - one of my neighbors raises beef cattle.
Indiana,
Jealously RE beef. Would kill for another beef tongue right about now...
Jen, I'm sorry you're having to deal with attitude from family and so-called friends/concern trolls. Seconding the Fuck You in a big way.
Was out of town this past weekend so I missed my usual farmers market haul, though I got a bunch of tomatoes from my sister's garden.
In a similar boat as brat including going on the pill at 40 (49 now) and hoping I won't need surgery until menopause kicks in.
Don't be too jealous of the beef, Jen. It's the greasiest hamburger I've ever bought. But I should ask about beef tongue - my wife would probably appreciate it if I bought some home.
Joe--just be sure to NOT skin it before cooking it, boil it in brine (I used at least a cup of salt in the water to cover), and cook until tender at the root end--THEN skin. Enjoy...
SteveK--thx for the SCUM link. I especially love this item:
" On the other hand, those females least embedded in the male `Culture', the least nice, those crass and simple souls who reduce fucking to fucking, who are too childish for the grown-up world of suburbs, mortgages, mops and baby shit, too selfish to raise kids and husbands, too uncivilized to give a shit for anyones opinion of them, too arrogant to respect Daddy, the `Greats' or the deep wisdom of the Ancients, who trust only their own animal, gutter instincts, who equate Culture with chicks, whose sole diversion is prowling for emotional thrills and excitement, who are given to disgusting, nasty upsetting `scenes', hateful, violent bitches given to slamming those who unduly irritate them in the teeth, who'd sink a shiv into a man's chest or ram an icepick up his asshole as soon as look at him, if they knew they could get away with it, in short, those who, by the standards of our `culture' are SCUM... these females are cool and relatively cerebral and skirting asexuality.
Unhampered by propriety, niceness, discretion, public opinion, `morals', the respect of assholes, always funky, dirty, low-down SCUM gets around... and around and around... they've seen the whole show -- every bit of it -- the fucking scene, the dyke scene -- they've covered the whole waterfront, been under every dock and pier -- the peter pier, the pussy pier... you've got to go through a lot of sex to get to anti-sex, and SCUM's been through it all, and they're now ready for a new show; they want to crawl out from other the dock, move, take off, sink out. But SCUM doesn't yet prevail; SCUM's still in the gutter of our `society', which, if it's not deflected from its present course and if the Bomb doesn't drop on it, will hump itself to death. "
The irony: Typing this while listening to the news; the Conservatives have yet again managed to kill stem-cell research from human embryos.
Because you know that on the weekend I would just hang around and get pregnant so that I could go get a recreational D&C between catching the matinee movie and getting drunk later.
Meh.
Commenting by HaloScan
