St. Helen herself will protect you from her fiery namesake.
Or at least she'll excavate you eons from now, as she did the True Cross in Jerusalem. 
Mark,
Remember to bring enough banana peels and empty beer cans with you into the bunker to power your Mr. Fusion.
Just don't put those beans up your nose.
You mean to tell me your bunker doesn't have Wi-Fi?
Well at least you have your wife with you down there to remind you of just how wrong you are, so you won't really miss us combox pj'ers! 
I just looked out the window, Mark, and the mountain looks good from down here in Portland. Maybe you're just looking for an excuse to eat beans.
Hmmm...it's apt to get more than a bit "whiffy" hunkered down there in yonder Volcano Bunker, what with all those beans and such; I recommend, therefore, that you put on a video of "Dante's Peak" to relieve the tension and entertain the kiddies...!
Thank heavens that we only have to deal with the occasional hurricane, twister, flood, and earthquake here in boring old Massachusetts!
I've got a few of those smokin' mountains handy to me. The 3 central North Island volcanoes - Ruapehu, Togariro and Ngaruahoe are all only about 150 miles away - only Ruapehu is smoking at the moment, but the crater lake is filling. The govt. has done nothing to relieve the build-up, and we are expecting a major lahar or eruption within the next 12 months. The other 2 are dormant at this time, but they wake occasioally and give us a display of molten rock into the night sky - awesome.
White Island is the most active volcano at the moment - constantly erupting. Its about 17miles north off the coast of the Bay of Plenty - about 40 miles from here.Interesting history, but that's another story.
Somehow hurricanes in Florida don't seem so bad in light of volcanoes.
It's just such a shame sometimes that Mark refuses to watch television. Otherwise he would know how Homer Simpson solved the dilemma when the pressure was building up in the nuclear reactor and it was about to blow.
Too bad Mark doesn't have a television, cause I would love to see him holding back the eruption in such a way. Mumu optional...
C'mon Mark! Your not close to THAT Volcano
By the way, Mt. St. Helens is named after a British diplomat. Mt. Hood was named after a British admiral (cf. HMS Hood of WWII) and of course Pudget Sound after Peter Pudget, RN.
I can picture some of the residents of Washington offering up sacrifices to Vulcan now like good paleo- and neo- pagans.
Peter Puget was a Registered Nurse?
John K:
ROTFLOL! I can still remember Bart's observation about the irony of the solution--thanks!
I don't think that approach can be recommended as a general rule, though.
Mark:
Relax--Mt. St. Helens (more directly named after some limey aristo, and not the fine saint), even if it blows its cork like last time, will merely send a lot of air filter-clogging ash your way. Pyroclastic flows aren't really an issue for Seattle-ites. Unless you're talking Mt. Rainier, a far bigger and far closer volcano long overdue for an eruption.
So, don't worry about Mt. St. Helens.
I'd side with Dale. You're in a lot more danger from Rainier -- that would be about the worst disaster the state of Washington could muster.
Nature's Fury could be something induced by a diet of beans and bottled water.
I haven't seen much of The Simpsons, but I imagine the solution has something to do with toroidal comestibles.
"I haven't seen much of The Simpsons, but I imagine the solution has something to do with toroidal comestibles."
Doesn't everything....?
"Toroidal comestibles" - as in doughnuts? Mark, if you don't have a TV, surely you can't be w/out a music system ... As they say, "a day w/out Mozart is like a day w/out sunshine" ... A few years ago we in Quebec were "treated" to the Ice Storm of 1998 -- at least the volcano will be warmer ... (OK, will slink off into corner now ... bad joke) ...
I agree with Dale, Mark -- save the bunker for Rainier.
Oh, and Lynn? I've done both hurricanes and volcanoes, and I have to say -- either is a pain, but at least your rugs don't smell like rotting cabbage if you get ash on them.
Ooh! Ooh! I just can't resist showing off.
Ahem. Rainier does indeed have the FEMA-types worried, but not so much for fear of an eruption as for fear of mud slides. If the mountain should suddenly heat up a few degrees, the glaciers could suddenly slide off and go travelling cross-country. Excavaitions at Orting -- a town near by the mountain -- have shown that mud flows tens of feet deep have covered the area in the not-too-distant past. FEMA has gone so far as to place alarms on the creek leading from Rainier in hopes of giving Orting a few minutes notice of an approaching slide.
Kinda gives the well-worn political accusation of "mudslinging" a far more literal perspective, doesn't it....?
The rangers at Rainier used to tell us all about this at the campfire evenings. Brilliant thing to tell kids just before they were bundled off into their tents to sleep.
I've just heard in the news that "white smoke" is rising from the peak of Mt. St. Helen's.
That means either 1) the eruption is beginning, or 2) Mark Shea has been elected Pope.
Accipite, Mark?
All joking aside, keep you and your fambly safe. We'll keep the good folks of Washington state in our prayers.
I'm here in Seattle, about ten miles closer to St Helens than is Mark. I have yet to be engulfed in firey clouds of ash, so I think it's safe to assume that it isn't vulcanism that causing Mark to withold himself from his adoring fans.
"All joking aside, keep you and your fambly safe. We'll keep the good folks of Washington state in our prayers."
Fear not, Kev. With the notable exception of the Shea family, all the *good folks* of Washington are on the east side of the state, upwind from the crater.
Let's hope that Mark knows at least ten other good men over there.
I once read an article worrying that Tacoma or Olympia could be toast if Rainier ever blows its top. Any truth to that, Washingtonians, or just alarmist sensationalism?
Quite possible. Tacoma is built right on top of the last pyroclastic flow from Rainier. Olympia is also uncomfortably close to the Nisqually basin where mud flows are likely to wind up.
Forget worrying about the lava and ash. When I clicked on the "Volcanocam" at 15:24:01 Pacific Daylight Time (October 1), I saw the real danger...
GIANT FLIES!
Man, that fly must be at least five miles long, about to descend on one half of the Mount St. Helens crater. Who will save us from THEM?
Eat your heart out, Mothra!
I still say that "Dante's Peak" had it nailed....!
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