The Sci Fi Catholic Yak Module
And if I hear that one in a homily someday...
Wow... I wasn't ready for that one.
Did you hear the one when Descartes walked into a bar? The bartender asked him, "Can I get you anything to drink?" Descartes looked around for a while at the selection, pondered for a bit, and then in his snobby, French way responded "I think not..."
...and promptly disappeared.
More on Descartes' "robot" daughter may be found at http://www.edge.org/3rd_culture/
...om04_index.html .
The story is apocryphal, but still plausible. Numerous clockwork automata were manufactured in the 16th century; France in the 17th century was the birthplace of those ingenious mechanical toys that were to become prototypes for the engines of the Industrial Revolution (Wikk: "Automaton").
Descartes claimed to be a devout Catholic until his death. After her meetings with him, Queen Christina publicly converted to Catholicism, though it meant renouncing her throne.
*stares blankly, trying to figure it out*
...
GAAAH!!!
I think I read somewhere that the robot daughter story wasn't invented until the 19th century or so, but I don't clearly remember.
The story directly informed Villier de l'Isle-Adam's Eve of the Future, which in turn was probably partly responsible for inspiring Metropolis.
May God forgive you! 
(signed) Ferdinand Feghoot
I knew eventually you'd discover my weakness for puns. And then I'd have to admit... I LOVE THESE KIND OF THINGS.
Okay, everyone else, lower the boom. I don't care!
Sara, a bad homily doesn't begin with a joke involving Descartes. A bad homily begins with the words, "I love the show Seinfeld," and continues with language that should never be used in church. I wish I was making it up.
How about a joke of Descartes the mathematician?? That's where my world lies..
They are one and the same.
Here's one of Descartes the Mathematician, Philosopher and Physicist:
From http://www.xs4all.nl/~jcdverha/
s...tml#Descartes_6 : Did you know that Rene Descartes met the Hunchback of Notre Dame? They were both visiting Paris, and met on a ferry crossing the famous river. Somehow Quasimodo fell overboard. He disappeared under the water because of the weight of handbells he was carrying on his belt. As Descartes began a rescue, he shouted, "Quasimodo, I see where you are," and plopped on his coordinates. He found Quasimodo was already headed toward shore. He seemed to be running across the bottom, but then Descartes saw he was dancing!
Descartes signed to him: "What are you doing that for?" Quasimodo signed back, "Save yourself! I'm happy. I'm just Ringing In The Seine!!" So Rene reached the shore by bobbing up and down. An onlooker asked, "How did you do that?" "I'm a Cartesian diver," replied Descartes. "I realized, 'I sink.' Therefore I swam."
---------
And, some follow-ups to an earlier joke:
From http://www.xs4all.nl/~jcdverha/
s...tml#Descartes_5 :
Rene Descartes was sitting at a bar. The bartender came over and asked if he would like another drink. He replied, "I think not." And he vanished.
Heisenburg was also sitting at the bar. After Descartes vanished in a puff of smoke, the bartender walked over to him and asked, "Did you see that?" To which Heisenberg replied, "I can't be certain."
The bartender then noticed Einstein was there. So he asked him if he could believe what had happened. Einstein replied, "It's all relative."
Then the bartender noticed that Carl Sagan was there. He walked over to him and asked, "Can you believe that all these famous people are here in THIS bar?" Sagan replied, "No. Why there must be BILLIONS and BILLIONS of bars out there."
The bartender asked Georg Ohm what had happened, but Ohm resisted giving any answer.
Meanwhile, Gustav Hertz was having such a great time, that he promised to return in the future at a much greater frequency.
Robert Boyle commented that he thought everyone was under too much pressure to come up with an answer to what was happening.
Erwin Schroedinger tried to explain that in the absence of an observer, Decartes left but at the same time did not leave.
But Alexander Volta disagreed stating there was a potential difference between his staying or going.
James Watt had had a bad day and said he had come in just to let off a little steam.
Charles Darwin refused to take a stand on the day's events as he was waiting to see what would evolve.
Thomas Edison stated that he found the whole thing illuminating.
... and on and on.
Graham--
The potentially SAD thing is that I got every single one of them Far too many science classes..
I do love a good pun. And this one got me good. Thanks.
As long as we're talking about Descartes, I considered naming my blog, "Blogito ergo sum." Obviously a play on "Cogito ergo sum," or "I think, therefore I am." I read the Discourse on Method about a thousand years ago when I was a college undergraduate. I can sing Monty Python's "The Philosopher's Drinking Song," which includes the lines "Rene Descartes was a drunken fart, I drink therefore I am." Do I get any extra geek points now?
...Monte Python, the Absurdist gift that just keeps on giving. Niall, no drinking while looking at Girl G--er, I mean the Golden Age of Ballooning. 
For those who would like to learn a bit more about Rene Descartes without being brutalized by a philisophy textbook I recommend "Introducing Descartes" by Dave Robinson and Chris Garrett. It is a volume in the "Introducing" series published by Icon Books/Totem Books, copyright 1998. It is written and illustrated in "graphic novel" style and a fun and easy read..I greatly enjoyed it. I have also finished "Introducing Plato," a great beginning book on Plato and Socrates. For those of us who have never had any Philosphy and are intimidated by the study, these are great books to get ya warmed up. One of these days I will have sufficient knowledge to understand JPII's writings (St Teresa Benedicta also).
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