I keep reading these in amazement. What a life! I also am waiting to find out if Terry ended up with a jealous, angst-ridden girl and is miserable somewhere (hope hope hope)
I was in a relationship for 3 years that was 3 years too long. Tough to get out when you've invested so much (and believe me, it was a lot), but one day, you just say "I've had enough" and kick him down the stairs on th back deck...ooops, wasn't supposed to say that.
Terry is one case wherein I would argue that he is directly a product of how he was raised and his insane parents. This does not excuse his behavior as a boyfriend, and does not mean it isn't a good thing we didn't stay together, but to be honest, looking back I feel sort of sorry for him. I'd be much happier to find out he found a good therapist and became a nice normal person.
It's so wierd to hear these stories and remember those days, but as someone in a totally different orbit in somewhat the same group of friends. I remember you and Terry, of course, but I never knew anything other than the fact that you had been a couple FOREVER. Because, back then, it really was FOREVER. And I was also hanging on to the worst relationship ever with you-know-who.
What is it with girls that age being latched on to the world's biggest creep-o's when, using the advantage of having young, nubile bodies etc, we could have been with any man (or men) that we wanted to? Well, I should say "boys" but I remember thinking of all the nice boys who would have done anything to go out with me and I was hanging on to a miserable relationship. And I thought I was the only one! Maybe we should make sure if our daughters date someone more than a month they "disappear".
Hehe...
Actually, I had horrible self-esteem in high school and college. It took years before I got it through my thick skull that when the guys referred to me as "the peanut" they were complimenting my womanly figure, not making fun of my intelligence.
There's kind of a twin issue here, too. Because it took me SO FREAKIN' LONG to actually get a guy to go out with me (and even then only a guy I met online), I was convinced that if I dumped Terry I'd never trick another guy into going out with me. The other issue being that after dealing with my brother, I think I had that "Well, at least he's not trying to kidnap me or making suicide/murder plans, so that's something" attitude going on.
Jules...you are making me cry!!!
HUGS
LD
Yeah, look who she's stuck with now...
Everything that happened to us back then made us who we are today. Aren't you glad we learned these things back then and aren't just getting to it now? When we can do much stupider things... I remember wasting TONS of money/time on my significant others back in the day... If I tried that now I'd be in serious trouble.
Sorry, I'd rather be a less bitter person who doesn't struggle with alcoholism or worry about how she will ever explain to her daughter about her evil uncle (who is still out there!!) and feeling torn between encouraging my daughter to have a good relationship with my parents and wondering at what age I should cease letting her go over to their house unsupervised.
For our reading audience - you'll notice that so far my parents have failed to notice or intervene in serious alcohol usage, drug usage, multiple pregnancy scares, and that, oh yeah, there is no mention of "Oh no, if I go to Vegas won't my parents worry about me? Won't they wonder where I am?" No, of course, not. I don't think they even noticed I was gone. I could have held up a giant neon sign that said "HELLO! I have mental problems and am in an emotional abusive relationship and need a good 12 step program!" and they probably wouldn't have noticed.
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