From the Life of the Marionettes.
Poor Mike gets caught murdering male a hooker in the bathroom at halftime and is interogated live on the air by a Dr. Heinsohn.
Lots of dream sequences involving a Len Bias and Reggie Lewis that never died, and a Larry Bird that took a sneaker contract with Nike, not Converse preventing his back from blowing out for wearing what amounted to two strips of rubber under his feet year after year.
Great stuff Chestnutt. Does Pierce look like he's shut it down or what? Further proof to the fanboys that two weeks do not make a season. A week ago I was reading things about the Celtics on the verge of becoming a 50 win team. The good old days.
Your comments on the game are insightful, original, and laugh-out-loud funny. Thanks. As for Kwame's big night, though, you have to remember he's playing against Raef. Anybody could look like he's reviving his career against Raef...even Raef.
I always thought Mike and Tommy sucked each other's cock at halftime, though. I'll have to look closer for these signs of tension. This could make the rest of this season's games worth watching.
And, although I agree Tommy has become unlistenable due to his constant, incorrect disagreement with calls against the Celtics and his disingenuous support of such ridiculousness as a center who only shoots threes (nevermind eight years of 'loving' Walter), I don't think it's fair to disparage his character or to insinuate, however indirectly, that he smells like hard alcohol. Tommy seems like an otherwise standup guy.
Tommy is also senile... And crazy
Willie, that's fucking perfect, hahahaha, we'll call it From the Life of the Gormanettes. We could also have The Passion of GormAnna featuring Tanguay as the guy killing cows on the island, only in this case, he's actually killing our valuable time. Also, maybe Dickerson can find Erland Josephan or Liv Ullmann in the crowd and pester them with questions about football. "Up next, Superfan Sven Nordquist!"
Anon, thanks for the nice words, they're truly appreciated. As for Tommy/hard liquor, yr probably right to say it's unfair, and I don't mean to imply (as many do) that he's really a drinker. There are two schools of thought, some believe Tommy's always hammered, some think he's just goofy/shameless. I am in the latter camp, but I find his entire Persona (haha, see Bergman references above) to be reminiscent of an abusive/alcoholic patriarch. In real life he's probably a stand up dude, even if he names awards about exceptional hustle and effort AFTER HIMSELF. In that sense, his is a burden of senility/craziness as RDFan sez. But truly, I don't mean to imply he has a drinking problem, because I don't think he does, but in the same vein, it's not meant to demean Gorman by casting him in the role of the Pilates toned "wife" hoping to strike it out on her own. In both cases, they serve as useful metaphors to explore one of the most truly strange (and not often discussed) broadcasting partnerships ever forged in sport.
Ainge can't "stand pat" this offseason can he?
will he wait to the deadline next year, rolling the dice with this mediocre band of misfits and wannabes that he's assembled in the hope that they can win enough games to get into the playoffs and if they don't then trade Pierce or does he make a splash this summer?
Yeah, I get nervous thinking like, Hedu Terkoglu, is in our future. Unless we can get Bosh for Jefferson/picks, which seems highly doubtful, I don't see any one guy we could get who'd make any kind of difference. If Danny's main concern is scoring off the bench, he can probably find that in the draft. My guess is that he'll trade one of the young guys and our pick(s) this year for some crappy vet, and if things keep looking grim, he'll move Pierce NEXT summer, prior to his player option. In other words, I'm fully ready for more of the excruciating same.
Also, was it me, or does Andrew Bynum seem a lot smaller than he used to be?
he's lost a ton of weight.
He could gain it back quickly; my wife has a secret. One day I caught her rubbing wax paper on her titties. "I heard this will make them bigger," she said. My response escaped my mouth before I could stop myself. "Why don't you use toilet paper. Look what it did for your ass!"
hahahahaha. Scalaburine must own lots of wax paper. Get Tittyfuck on the case!
C-Blog talking about Pierce as the best ever? Maybe I read that wrong, but the headline and subsequent article sure sounded that way. Needless to say I disagree....
yeah, I'm trying to write a lengthy thing on that between work stuff. Absurd. Heinsohn is a fucking hack and he still resents the Bird-era for overshadowing the 70's teams. Fuck him.
My favorite heinson moment of recent games was when he asked gorman what the free throw numbers were for each team and gorman just said "I'm not telling you."
I've always liked that the celtics don't really have any players who are constantly whining to the refs (Kobe, AI, etc.), but lately tommy has been more than making up for that. (I guess perk complains sometimes, but i actually like it when he does it, because i always get excited that he's going to start a brawl.)
Excellent... Gorman....
People on fan sites have the shortest memories I've ever seen. Two months ago they wanted to trade Pierce. Now he is the best player that ever walked on the court. It is like the Yao thing. He has two good weeks and suddenly he is a top center of all time, and is better than Shaq ever was. These guys are assholes, idiots and generally retarded. I can't believe people actually think like that.
like I said, I was reading last week that the Celtics were on the verge of being a 50 win team and needing the last piece of the championship puzzle.
If they've legalized walk in lobotomies let me know, I must've missed the news that day.
Interesting game last night. Bosh looks solid on the Raptors, but can the kid play in the big leagues?
yes.
I missed the game last night, but it seems like DWest played well. I'm working on that Heinsohn piece which has spiralled out of control (1700 words and counting), but hopefully I'll have it up in a few hours.
WPDK - that was always a problem with Toine, for a likeable guy, his on-court bitching got old very quickly. I tend to believe that complaining about calls that don't decide the game is pretty lame. It's sad to see LeBron doing that a lot too lately.
Willie, it still amazes me that this team has yet to win three games in a row (only team in the league), and people are talking about being a 4th seed next year (and not just bloggers, Donny Marshall, normally a voice of reason, said this the other night).
RDF - I think Bosh is the real deal, but more in a Jermaine O'Neal "you need lots of the right pieces around him" way than an Amare "Holy Fuck this guy can single handedly win you games" Stoudemire way. Al Jefferson, on the other hand, is a poor man's right-handed Chris Bosh.
Bosh has some flashes for sure...
Toine is going to have to step it up with Zo out.
On the Jermaine "Help me, I'm made of glass" O'Neal, I see him as someone that people gamble on to get next to Pierce. He is becoming less of an asset to the Pacers. He bitched about Ronny (understandably so). But he did it to the media. That didn't go over well with the org. He's been injured three times for more than a couple weeks in the last two seasons, and was suspended for punching a guy. I think he might on the trading block soon. At least before his value plummets.
Walker really stepped it up last night, launching that air ball from 30 feet out of a time out that had Riley ready for a nervous breakdown.
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