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Huh - I got burglarized last week, and in a decent apartment with stuff like a computer, camera, TV and DVD player, the little asswipe only took a PS2.
I am glad nothing was stolen, and even more glad that you were not there when it happened.
stupid question: are you going to prosecute? well, i guess you'd press charges, the lawyers would do the prosecuting.
ok the last couple of lines have my laughing at work. That is just too freakin' funny! And dumb!
next, on America's Dumbest (and horniest, and drug-addled) Criminals! Well, I'm glad too that 1) you weren't there, and 2) they didn't take anything.
But what an odd tale.
The woman didn't realize what kind of store it is? What was she there for, needlepoint?
Maybe she went in to verify there had been a breakin and say she knew who'd done it, not to actually buy something or browse.
That is pretty impressive, though, the rampant stupidity that seems to run in and out of your shop and give you post fodder.
Oh.my.god. Your tales of bizarre people get funnier and funnier.
My favorite sentence in this terrific post:
"By this time the locksmith had joined us, managing to escape the office without snagging his sleeve on the office door and getting hopelessly caught."
I snorted. Out loud. At work.
I'm glad they didn't take or destroy anything, and that nobody got hurt...Other than the locksmith, who probably tripped on the way to his car.
frostedlexicharm is right, she just came in to verify that we'd been broken into and tell us who did it. I don't think we're going to press charges. The woman and her ex aren't going to press charges, and since they were the intended victims, if they're not going to worry about it, neither will I.
Great, Krupskaya, now I'm picturing needlepoint vibrator cozies. Now there's a new show idea for the DIY Network...
Speaking of wacky breakins--back in 1986, someone (except I'm sure it was my upstairs neighbor) broke in to my apartment merely to steal a TI994A computer, along with the 12" black & white TV with a broken antenna. He also chose to pass up better loot (my stereo, guitar, and coin collection).
This TI was obselete when I'd received it two years before, so in today's terms it would be similar to someone breaking in to steal a 286.
I hope he had a fun time trying to pawn it.
Hysterical! All the funniest stuff happens at your shop! This just makes me laugh and laugh....
"She shrugged. "He's a drug addict," she said, as if crack heads breaking into people's apartments to have wild monkey sex in strangers' beds was an established pattern of behavior."
That was the bit which made me laugh, even more than the rest.
I got broken into twice when I was in Russia. The first time, they took my tapes, baseball jersey, soccer shoes, baseball glove, and wad of rubles, but left my jeans, jewelry, baseball hat, and wad of dollars. They also took my curling iron, box of condoms, and my swimming suit. Who wants a used swimming suit?
Wow. That was a good story. It has a little of everything... sex, crime, humor...
My parents' house was broken into when I was a kid. The burglars took just about everything, including some costume jewelery, but couldn't figure out how to get the tv/vcr/cable box from my parents' room. Apparently the way my dad had rigged it up was way to difficult for them. LoL.
too many break-ins in my life to count, and they always seem to miss the really good stuff. Computer thieves who had it too stuck in their head that they were *computer* thieves to open my jewelry box, right there on a shelf above them - not that I owned any jewelry worth stealing at the time, but there was about $400 in cash stuffed in there for safekeeping.
And don't even get me started on the ones who broke into my mom's car when I was a kid and stole our tapes. 2 kids, 8 and 5 - You gotta think, when they got home and opened the tapeholder, and saw all the disney soundtracks, they were like, "*yes*! The Little Mermaid! I've been trying to steal that for *forever*!"
had a car stolen once, apparently by a kid who wanted to take it for a joyride. other than the shattered outside of the steering column, the seat kicked back and the radio changed to a different station, nothing in the car was touched.
including the contents of the ashtray. i don't smoke, and my habit back then was that when i went through a fast food drive-thru or stopped at a gas station and they gave me change, it got stuffed in the ashtray. there must have been at least twenty, thirty bucks in there.
They used to steal lawnmowers from my garage until I finally got a clue and now use a bike lock. I saw one of them being wheeled at a run down the street, but he was too far away for me to catch.
Just under the deductible for insurance, too. Damn!
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