Comments Lounge
Great story! And I was just gonna ask you if you wanted 2 couches from the TF storage area...but you never called me back. Weird!
Oh, this is great. One thing that Eddy, my bulimic cat, has not done yet is throw up on the couch. He sticks to the floor and, in one memorable incident, my roommate's bed.
I so wish I lived in Chicago because there are so many questions I have. I wish my office would do a party like this. I don't suppose you'd consider coming to Minnesota.
Flea, how did Crowder Pea get his/her name?
Awww, how sweet, Crowder Pea decided to christen the couch for you. ;p
It’s so exciting to get something to replace what you’ve done without for so long. I endured walking to work for about a year because we had no way to afford a second car. We did without TV for even longer because we couldn’t afford cable and we literally got no antennae reception. The kids (a boy and girl) managed not to kill each other sharing a bedroom because we could only afford a two-bedroom apartment.
But then one by one we got our privileges back so to speak. It’s like being grounded and then finally being released.
Glad your party went well. Glad to see you now have couches. Maybe you should invest in plastic slipcovers.
Congratulations on your presentation and even more congratulations on your couches!
It's the little things that make you appreciate life (insert penis joke here) (insert insert penis joke here)
"I immediately went into ostrich mode, feeling sure that if I just didn't make eye contact, nobody would see me standing there holding an 8" blue penis."
Classic!
That group of ladies sounds awesome. I'm glad it was such a success for you...and for them!
Plastic slipcovers? Nah... do what my parents do and drape an old sheet over the couch. Comfy and easy to wash.
Glad the party went well!
Rana
Couches! I'm so pleased for you!! For your cat, you probably know this, but there's a tube of stuff you can get at the pet store called Laxatone (I think), which is basically sweet-flavored vaseline. You feed it to the cat at regular intervals and they tend to crap out more of the hairballs instead of barfing them on your furniture.
In practice, however, our cats still barf on the furniture. Because Laxatone does not come with a klaxon siren that goes off at regular intervals reminding you to feed it to the cats.
"No, YOU wear it." LMAO.
Imagine if you were in a car wreck on your way to your presentation.
The jaws of life would be releasing your from your wrecked car and they'd find you surrounded by butt plugs and other vibrating private things.
YAY couches.
Next time put some pillows on the floor to soften his fall. My daughter does the couch thing as so far this has worked.
i blame this entry for the dream i had last night, flea. you invited all your friends from the internet to come to your store and i bought two or three vibrators, a dildo, underwear, and a lifetime supply of lube.
Finally going to have a "passion party" in October - I can hardly wait! My friends and I have no shame, so it should be a good time. Liked reading your description of your presentation - there's my laugh for the day, and with two toddlers I need all the laughs I can get. So thanks.
What IS it with cool women and asshole husbands? I can count on one hand, or maybe two fingers, the number of guys I've known who could do better, partner-wise, but I have met or read literally HUNDREDS of women who are with stupid jerks. Do these women's orgasms, like, belong to their husbands or something? Because apparently that's the way the husbands see it.
*takes a deep breath* Okay, judging, judging. Don't hate.
What's that stuff called? Laxatone? I, too, know the love of a bulimic cat...
Laurie, I totally forgot to call you back. I'm sorry!
DM - Southern Wisconsin, yes, Minnesota, no. However, if you'd like to throw your own parties, we don't have any reps in MN, so e-mail me about it if you want.
Grace - I used to have a cat named Crummers, and one of my sister's friends could never remember her name and kept calling her "Crowder". So I told her if I ever got another cat I'd name it Crowder Pea so when she asked about my cat, she'd finally get the name right.
And speaking of Crowder, she isn't bulimec, she's got cancer. Stay tuned for an obit - I suspect it's right around the corner. In the meantime, we've covered the couches with old blankets.
continued -
Melissa - Bring on the Jaws of Life. I'm ready. (I *loved* the article you wrote for Parentland, btw)
That's not a dream, Wyz, that's a standing invitation to come spend money anytime! 
And to be fair, Morphienne, this was an older generation I was throwing the party for - one of the women freaked out when I said, "Introducing something new into the bedroom brings an element of excitement and uncertainty that makes you feel like you're 16 again." She had an issue with the fact that I said "16" and not "a newlywed". A lot of times there is a perception among older, more conservative people that only slutty women have a sex drive. But almost everybody else, husbands included, didn't have a problem with it. So that's a very good thing!
Oh, shit, flea. I'm sorry about Crowder Pea. When you didn't bring her up on Saturday, I was too chicken to ask...
Oh, I'm so sorry about Crowder Pea. I was going to say something snarky about her and now I feel bad for thinking it. Poor sick kitty.
The party sounds like a total blast. I like the guy who carried the suitcases b/c you had high heels on. What a sweetheart.
Oh, and re. little kids reading/knowing about sex toys, I'm curious how you handle it. We call the vibrators "tickle machines"--and luckily the dildoes I happen to have aren't particularly realistic-looking. But you should blog that sometime, the question of how to talk about kids re. sex toys, when they find 'em, as the little buggers inevitably will.
Gotta love kids and their takes on women's fashion. My son, bless his heart, was so amazed when I finally wore a skirt that he said over and over again, "Pretty Mommy!"
Then there was the time I actually put on some lipstick (for a change) to drop him off at preschool. "Mommy, you are going on a date?" Yeah, that's right. Mommies use school time for all their dating action...
LMAO on this whole post, especially since I went to high school on the North Shore and probably knew these women.
Re. your kids being shocked at you dressing like a girl... I recently lost enough weight to fit into my mom's just-like-new black faux fur from Nordstrom's, which she was giving away. I put it on and modeled for Jake, tres chic, and asked him if I looked pretty.... he said "Mommy, you look scary." I told him to feel how soft the coat was, and he amended, saying "You look like Scuzzy." (Our big, fat, black cat.) Oh well.
Amy - right, because the best time to go on a date is between 9:00am and noon! The bars are so much less crowded!
Thanks for the sympathy re: Crowder Pea. I'm feeling a bit callous about it right now, because I'm in denial about having to be the one who pulls the plug. Crummers died in my arms of natual causes, and Steve axed the dog, so now it's my turn, and I want to throw up when I think about it.
Oh, flea, I am so sorry about Crowder Pea.
Interestingly, some of the medical pros I work with actually are planning to have a stash handy so they can "put" THEMSELVES "to sleep" if they should ever deem it necessary. It's interesting. I'm considering it myself.
The consensus being, I guess, that for a lot of people living in such pain you can't think straight is worse than not living at all.
The problem would be expired pills. They're usually good for up to a year after the expiration date, depending on the drug. But still, your access would end at retirement age...so I guess you'd have to hoard meds or do it when you fill a new script.
Wow. Attempt at comfort turned into a sick, sad digression. That happens to me all the time!
Ooh, I have a kid and sex toy story:
One that does NOT involve CPS...but does take place at that same apartment. Nicky was about 4.
One of the neighbors and her girl kid, 5, came over to eat and play. Post dinner, we're chatting and the kids are playing upstairs. Then they come sashaying downstairs, singing and waving their arms around.
Each child has one of my super comfy lined black leather restraints around one wrist. They'd removed them from my bed and apparently figured out they go around some extremity or another...
And they shared. That's nice, isn't it?
You can try www.petmedicinechest.com to help your cat heal from the cancer.
Commenting by HaloScan
