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I like how at the end of the commercial, they include a gorgeous blond with a skimpy dress - yep, makes me think of the doctor each and every time.
I experienced ADHD when I married. My husband has a son from a previous marriage who was diagnosed at 5. He cannot keep it together without medication. We're still not sure how far this bright and intelligent boy will do when he gets into college and tries for a career. He's currently a junior in high school (16).
They have been doing a study where I work on Boys to Men, a study of men who used ritalin as children and into teenage years and where they are today. By and large, those who continued with their medication as prescribed are doing just fine as adults, they are professionals, intelligent, and I know one concern, they are within the norms of their family for size, no one is overly small for their size or too big.
It's a very interesting study.
Flea, thanks to both you and B for this.
My son has ADHD (so do I, it turns out, though it was overlooked until I was in my 50s because I'm "inattentive" rather than "hyperactive"). We're both on a Ritalin variant now and I can't tell you what a difference it has made for us.
I have gotten a lot of flak for our decision to medicate him, from teachers at his school, fellow mental health professionals, and random people who hear about it and feel entitled to chime in. The assumption is that we are ignorant of other possible causes for his restlessness, disorganization, and difficulty attending and concentrating, or that we are too self-involved to give him the structure and attention he would need to achieve optimum functioning.
For us, as for most parents I know, medication was a last resort, not a first impulse. We tried removing white flour, sugar, and additives from his diet. We tried alternative therapies. We tried ramping up his exercise. Etc., etc. I jeopardized my livelihood because I was always in the principal's office or on the phone--and the implication was always that I was a bad mother who wasn't raising her kid right. The decision to medicate just cemented that.
Things are not perfect now, but my son can sit in class and think, not just react. He plans ahead of time and takes possible consequences into consideration. After it became clear that the meds were addressing problems I'd struggled with for years, I started seeing the specialist as well, and now my files are in alphabetical order for the first time and it's been over a year since I scheduled two clients for the same time slot.
I can now imagine my son going on to college and/or a responsible career. My own life is now orderly enough so that I actually get to spend time just being with him. These are the important outcomes--not the judgment of people who ultimately don't matter to us.
Amy mentioned the study that addressed boys who had been on Ritalin and resulting growth to manhood. Stunting my son's growth was a fear I had the whole time he was on Ritalin. Side effects that I could witness were nothing to the fear of what was happening that I could not see! The results after 11 years on "the little yellow pill" were not evidenced in his growth to adulthood other than what appeared to be normal for our family. His father is 6' 1", I am 5'7", our son is 6' and his sister is 5' 8". He has taller cousins but who is to know for sure if he would have grown another inch or two.
I too tried every dietary wisdom that was proported at the time. I got up early for years in order to make special meals before I went to work only to find out that control of consumed food was wrenched from me as soon as my son could buy a Butterfinger at the little store on his way to school and trade treats during lunch!
Remember those were the days when kids could still play outside alone, run to play at the park with friends without constant supervision, walk by themselves or with neighbors to school and be gone all day without me worrying if some pervert was going to "get them". In many ways, life was easier then, a lot easier for us and our children.
I feel for all of you going through this hard time but keep up the good work and believe in yourself and what you are doing. IT WORKS and 40 years later you really do remember the good times and NOT just the anger, panic, frustration, tears and general tearing of your heart and feelings to shreds. B
It's so good to read this. I've worried so much about the lasting effects of medication on my son too.
This is interesting: "after 5 months of age stopped naps, walked around furniture at 7 months and was walking/running at 12 months and climbing out of his crib, went to sleep finally at 9 o'clock and woke up at 5 AM"
EXACTLY the same here, except mine was walking/running at 10 months.
I guess its just all that energy. Mine was always a very 'physical' baby, and flea I seem to remember from the post that inspired this letter, you mentioned Alex 'kicking kicking kicking' his feet at an early age.
Of course, I kind of had a hint I was in for a ride less than an hour after birth the doctor comes in from examining him and says "Are you nursing him?" and when I say yes, he rolls his eyes and says "Be patient. He has a VICIOUS sucking reflex" (and boy-howdy, did he! He was born with a blister on the back of his hand.)
That doctor is totally fake smoking.
Love the guest post. Also love the Camel ad. My grandmother was a nurse and smoked on the advice of the dr. she worked for, "to help her throat." She died of lung cancer, but never stopped saying the smoke helped her throat.
I like the idea of a scream closet. What a great stress reliever! I'm setting one up now.
My brother started taking ritalin in 1973 or so. He's been a VP and CTO of small companies. Yay ritalin! He was off it for a while, now he's on adderall or something. And he's just about 6 feet tall, I guess.
i almost never watch oprah, but jenny mccarthy was on the other day/night talking about her son with autism. it was really interesting to me.
her friend, holly robinson peete was also on, and said something i will not forget, especially in my own journey with manic-depression ... my son is not autistic. he HAS autism.
cool.
Thanks for posting this, and for your essay about the Elephant in the Playroom. I read it a while ago and loved it.
As someone whose life was changed -- maybe even saved -- by being put on Ritalin at age 12, I will go to the mat with anyone who tries to tell me that no one needs meds for ADHD and that all kids like me need to "get better" is love / attention / discipline / whatever.
Thanks for posting this, it is helpful to read others experiences, I recently posted about my heart rending experience with my decision to medicate my son here http://wifesoup.typepad.com/wife...e-out-to-
m.html
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