This Is Not A Democracy, It's A Republic........
In the spirit of reciprocation, here's one for you:
A guy walks into a bar and sees a gorgeous woman sipping a drink. Walking up behind her he says, "Hi, there, good lookin'! How's it going?"
Having already downed a few power drinks, she turned around, faced him, looked him straight in the eye and said, "Listen up, buddy. I screw anybody, any time, anywhere, your place, my
place, in the car, front door, back door, on the ground, standing up, sitting down, naked or with clothes on, dirty, clean ... it just doesn't matter to me. I've been doing it ever since I got out of college and I just flat-ass love it."
Eyes now wide with interest, he responded, "No kidding. I'm a lawyer, too. What firm are you with?"
And one more:
A man and a woman were sitting beside each other in the first class section of an airplane. The woman sneezed, took out a tissue, gently wiped her nose, and then visibly shuddered for ten to fifteen seconds. The man went back to his reading.
A few minutes later, the woman sneezed again, took a tissue, wiped her nose, and then shuddered violently once more. Assuming that the woman might have a cold, the man was still curious about the shuddering.
A few more minutes passed when the woman sneezed yet again. As before she took a tissue, wiped her nose, her body shaking ever more than before.
Unable to restrain his curiosity, the man turned to the woman and said, "I couldn't help but notice that you've sneezed three times, wiped your nose and then shuddered violently. Are you ok?"
"I am sorry if I disturbed you. I have a very rare medical condition: whenever I sneeze I have an orgasm."
The man, more than a bit embarrassed, was still curious. “I have never heard of that condition before. Are you taking anything for it?"
The woman nodded, "Pepper."
I think that's enough for today...
Heard the first one, the second one is hilarious!!!!!!!!!!!! LOVE IT!!!!!!
Heheheee!
I stole your joke, Jenn, posted it, and linked to you. I steal jokes, It's what I do!
"This blog is not endorsed by anyone, just my dog. And he is thinking of running for president in 2008."
Tell us more about your dog. A photo, perhaps? Sounds like he may have some good ideas if he gets elected to the White House in '08!
Never Argue with a Woman
One morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap. Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out. She motors out a short distance, anchors, and reads her book.
Along comes a Game Warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside the woman and says, "Good morning, Ma'am. What are you doing?"
"Reading a book," she replies, (thinking, "Isn't that obvious?")
"You're in a Restricted Fishing Area," he informs her.
"I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing. I'm reading."
"Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up."
"If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault," says the woman.
"But I haven't even touched you," says the game warden.
"That's true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment."
"Have a nice day ma'am," and he left.
MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads. It's likely she can also think.
I'd vote for Drake's dog over any Democrat!
Best jokes of the day:
1. Boxer, Byrd, Feingold, Harkin, Kennedy, Kerry voting to bring the troops home today.
2. 149 Democrats, 3 Republicans, 1 Independant voting that the U.S. will NOT prevail in the GWOT!!
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The Enemy Within is exactly that, and is also an Enema Within.
And those 3 (R)'s should be tossed on their asses..........Duncan, Leach, Paul.
I try not to go below the belt but couldn’t help this time.
“A man enters a bar and orders a drink.”
Which Kennedy?
A man walks into a bar and says "ow".
...Don't judge me.
Great joke, Jenn! Thanks for stopping by my blog! 
Yours is great!
Did you hear about the Kennedy that walked out of a bar?
It could happen!
VW
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