Talk to the Goat
Aw, Jamie, you are so incredibly sweet to Jason.
He definitely deserves that punch in the face.
what kind of chickens?
JAMIE! This is why you need a second husband.
You know, like in the movie 'Multiplicity' with the guy who played Batman? One of the clones was useful for things like this. Just be careful because he will accidentally have sex with you and will make you fall in love with your husband for new reasons.
And stop at the second clone, the third one is just trouble.
Was she gnawing through cooked chicken necks? I guess not. That wouldn't be bloody, unless the chicken was very rare (a bad idea with chicken) or she had some sort of gum disease. I'm guessing these were live chickens. I think the feathers would be almost as bothersome as the blood, but not as bothersome as the noise and the chicken pecking at your face in self-defense. Good thing it was just a dream.
You should cut Jason a break. Or not, what do I care? I don't even know the guy.
Good luck with your broken couch and your new couch.
Hello, Jay.
The only chicken varieties that I know of are: roast, fried, baked, grilled, etc. Sorry, Snag. But they were most definitely alive, and quite upset about being eaten in this way.
Well, I feel sorry for you stuck on the couch all day while he's at work. Make yourself some chicken, relax.
Yeah. I'd be seething too. I hate to say it, but if my man (fictional character that he is) did that to me, I'd prolly take a page out of my mother's book and give him about 10 minutes of silent treatment before speaking in very hostile tones for the following hour or so... you know, until he had grovelled appropraitely.
Oh! and try not to impale yourself on way-ward couch springs.
Good luck with the new couch tomorrow!!!
I have buff Orpingtons. I assume they feel the same about being bitten,
I, however, have not bitten one.
What did you have to eat before bed. My advise is avoid pork chops
Well, I hope that Jason gets his butt in gear so the two pf you can get a new couch.
Just tell him that if your hips are sore from the lop-sided old couch then it's just too painful for sex.
ha ha ha
I hate falling-apart-ass couches!!!
If you want more power behind the blow, try kicking.
*snort* Poor Jason. ;o)
Uhoh Jason, watch out. Go easy on him Jay, and make sure to leave marks where they won't show.
Don't you hate real life? I know I do.
Wow. And here I thought Jason must be perfect!
oh... just brimming with communication and love. see, that's what i love about you! 
Flavor Baby!
Jeff and I had a showing last week that he'd known about for 5 days. And for 5 days he said he'd be able to accompany me to the showing. I even asked if work would be a problem and was assured it wouldn't be.
When I arrived to get him I found him moving boxes getting ready for a meeting. He looked at me and said "I'm sorry Sarah, I might not be able to go w/ you. I've got a meeting."
So off to the showing I went alone. Now since he needed to see the space, I had to make a second appointment and drag the realtor back a second time. Jeff was also required to book the afternoon off work.
The point is, I know how you feel....except I don't have the strength to do damage w/ my punches.
Poor Jason...I know I'm siding with the wrong person, but someone's gotta be on his side to let him know it'll all be alright in the end, right?
Good idea, David! I'll join you. Let's take the guy's side for once! Uh, excuse me. I have to go. That's my wife asking me to take out the garbage...
Give the guy a break, lol stuff happens at work... especially when you have made other plans, it never fails 
It's amazing how much reading that post makes me wanna grit my teeth in frustration. The emotions really come through in your posts, Jay.
By the way, "SUCKED in between the sofa cushions??"
To hell with the broken couch. Just stay in bed until Jason gets his butt in gear and gets the new sofa. Go on strike. But don't beat on him too bad, you'll need him to rearrange the furniture several times until everything looks right.
I like this post like I like the milkshake one.
Wow, I thought I had weird dreams.
Screenplay idea: The Couch That Ate the Beautiful Bald Writer.
"I'm not a morning person" is just the best excuse , isn't it? Homicides should be saved for the waking hours. Terrific defense.
Jay, I think you are the most understanding wife.
I hope you get your new couch today. Judging from this post, and from what I know of Jason, (he seems highly intelligent) I would put money on it!
Hope you enjoy your new couch!
3T
Wow, I'm not sure I'd want to come home if I pulled one of those. Sounds like some righteous indignation going on there. Hope Jason survives.
Hope you have been successfully plucked from the grips of the couch cushion by now. Jason should be ashamed of himself for allowing such a fate to befall you, especially after the tragedy of slivering you with jewelry.
Oh boy...sounds like trouble is brewing. You're probably taking practice swings.
Aww, poor Jason. I know how he feels. I have sisters that use to punch me too. It was cute when they were younger, but started to hurt like hell as they grew, ouch. Lol!
I actually thought that this post was really cute. I know I should be sympathizing with you (for not getting that much needed 11 hour beauty rest, the waiting, the couch, etc), but you wrote it in such a way that I just can't help but laugh =)
I love letter that aren't actually letters. They're kind of like serious without all that seriousness to screw it up.
10:48am? What an ungodly hour! You are to be commended for your compassion and restraint under such trying circumstances.
It's nice that Jason has someone understanding like you to kick his ass.
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