Talk to the Goat
Oooh Baby, that was sooooooooooo gooooooooooood...
Please can I come to your place again?
Wow! Making eggrolls is extremely impressive. That is definitely something I need to put on my to-do list--if nothing more than to impress my hubby. 
Damn Eggrolls are my favorite, But I could never make them. I am so not Zen in that department.
Hope your left to go hours are fun filled.
what a great sense of humor. i need the chuckles so i will definitely be back. good luck the next time you slither!
Go girl with marking out your territory! ha ha
Thought the bit about making the extra effort to be a softened creature for slumber time was so funny, the things us girlies do for a bt of extra, how's your father ;>)
oooh! Any plans to blog the eggroll process on Sweet Jay's? I can make the cold "fresh rolls" but I tried frying a few leftovers and what a disaster - shoulda blogged it. :oP They went all hard but never browned. Maybe my temp was too low.
How about a shot of Jason's heavenly ass so we can cop a virtual feel?
What a foolish, foolish man to hide his penis!
Always sleep on your stomach! - John Wayne Bobbitt
he is a foolish, foolish man for sleeping on his stomach!
"I'll have to maybe take a leak on his jeans, to mark my territory."
Yes, do it. Or at least tell him you did it and watch for the reaction on his face.
As for Jason's sleeping position. You could always attempt to go play around his back door. I bet that'll wake him with a start. Always good to shock someone out of sweet sweet slumber.
Mwa ha ha ha ha!
A very inventive way to pay off that I.O.U. Thanks for the laughs.
Okay, I get that the asian dude meant spring and not summer but the IOU lady has me completely confused.
Marking your territory. Fantastic concept. I haven't thought of that in several thousand reincarnations.
Tell jason that sleeping on his stomach casues a bad back and wrinkles. Either that or get yourself a strap on and mount him for a hint.
Eggrolls? Please share the recipe!
As for Bowie, it all depends on which album...
the poor bastard....
jean pee, you sound like my flower.
enjoy Jay, enjoy
Stick some spikey things into his side of the mattress - you'll have him jumpin about in no time!
I love a good pair of jeans on a man. They just make his ass even more squeezable.
This is the only way I'll pardon losing half my cup of coffee. LOL!
Zen... it's what it's all about. Now, where's the enlightened recipie??
Mark your territory? that's great stuff.
How the heck does he sleep on his stomach? After midnight, there's no way I can sleep on my stomach, unless I'd want to bruise myself.
Sounds like even his unconscious mind in on to you.
I used to work in a store where we used a green pen to mark things down..ANYONE w/ a brain could come in w/ a green pen and mark shit down. Stores are just asking to be ripped off.
What can I say about you other than..................... YOU ROCK!
ohh you can still get to the goods, sleeping on the stomach or otherwise. just takes a bit more ... OOMPH.
and-- mmm, eggrolls.
Hey Jay, I have an already grown first born you can borrow to pay your debt... send me the paint and the potatoes! 
PS I love puddle stomping, too!
A dude? Laying on his STOMACH?? Being PROTECTIVE?!? This isn't adding up for me!
So jealous of your 3-day weekend though. I think you've actually kicked it off pretty well!
Do what I do when marking my territory and just piss directly on your boyfriend. Mine loves it. [!]
I love the naked slither! My chick does that some time - fabulour. Living in Kensington Market?
mmmmm....walmart candy aisle! I'm a sugar junkie myself and given the choice that's probably where'd i'd first! There or shoes....tough call.
I'd like to add your link to my blog if you'd permit it though, I do enjoy your writing, your very talented and funny!
Enjoy your weekend!
Sounds like Jason might have some hound in him. Even if there are enough to count on 4 paws that's 4 + 1 dw claw on the back and 4 claws on the front cause humans take 'em off in case they get ripped. I mean the claws, not the humans, Well, the humans can get ripped too I guess. In fact they are right now. Abandoned half-full wine glass at 3 o'clock, I'm going in - cover me sleeeeeeeeuuuurpahbaaddisabbaba cough, sputnik, hack . . .
Cal
Why not just pee on Jason, that way he'll be marked no matter what he wears!
Part time Mothers?
Mail me a sample of the eggrolls!
I sleep odd hours, too. People just don't understand why I'm a nightowl. Perhaps we're part vampire?
I can't wait until sunday now.
Fae
a plague on both your houses! wal-mart is evil (even in canada).
my zen is heating honey flavored corndogs in the microwave. i'm addicted.
e+
Jason seems like a far more forgiving person than I would be for that April Fools trick. Don't you know sleep is sacred? Then again maybe he was smiling as he remembered the brilliantly evil plan of his to get you back. Watch out...
i love it!!!
for some reason, you reminded me alot of my dog in this post.
So what's wrong with listening to David Bowie in the dark? Heros is a great tune for just such listening.
That was a mean April Fools joke. Funny, but mean.
I am worshipping at the MissJayShrine. you are totally brilliant. twisted and brilliant.
ah now that you have mastered eggrolls you should so master crab rangoon
I make a really good teriyaki sauce that is delicious on just about everything perhaps I need to teach it to you.
Pffff - you've only got 3 days - my other half is off work for a week!
Grrrr......
"stupid-walmart-garbage-face"
Taking a leak on the jeans to mark your territory is a riot! You are too funny
Thanks for visiting my blog, I'll be back!!!!
#1 - Hilarious.
#4 - So not fair.
Sounds like a perfect weekend to me Jay!!
(Oh, can you get *me* a deal on jeans that will make my ass look good?)
April Fool's Day is the best holiday ever. Unfortunately I forgot it was on Saturday and didn't have the chance to fool anyone. I shall be depressed about that until I make up for it NEXT year.
Whatever were you thinking giving that lady spray paint? Hair spray would have worked out much better and if she was Asian I don't even know if she would have needed it.
Maybe eggs would have made her feel better & worked out easier on your vehicle.
Christine
Oh, you still could have done things to him while he was lying on his stomach. The intial shock might have been a bit much, but I'm thinking he would get over it.
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