Talk to the Goat
Poopiest-day-ever.
Hope the knee gets better soon!
Love,
Jason
I have a friend who works at Whitechapel Art Gallery in London and at the end of the working day they found a pooh in the corner of one of the rooms.
It's quite a big room with no privacy, and she said that it looked like it had been sat there for a couple of hours.
I feel very sorry for Jason and his ticket. What an arsehole.
i'm so glad i came here bright and early this morning, leaves me a smile on my face
hope you're recovering nicely, on all accounts and as for poor jason, WTF on all accounts.
that shit story had me in tears waaaay too early in the morning. glad the legs are recovering nicely. i may have to fight you for that sensitive skin title, though.
Cops can be meanies.
Happy belated birthday, Jason!
"So lucky I later threw myself down a staircase."
Cannot stop giggling.
Jesus Christ! Don't tell me this all happened the same day. Let me know there was at LEAST 12 hours between each incident.
G.
What an extraordinary life you lead! I have never heard of people pooping in fitting rooms. Thanks for the enlightenment, next time I go in one I'll be wary.
Hope your leg feels better-that's why I still shave, because what happened to you is exactly what I fear would happen to me.
And here I was just bemoaning that the worst part of my week was getting bit on my dick by a mosquito.
A ticket for what??? And cleaning up a woman's poop??? AND you fell down some stairs???
Jay honey you and Jason definitely need a nice long holiday somewhere warm and sunny. I hope your knee is back to normal soon!
She left a poopie sandwich for Jason to clean up. How very thoughtful. Hopefully she didn't eat corn the day before.
Oh Jay, you've cured me from claiming the Murphy's Law Victim award as often as I do. Thank goodness you have such an excellent sense of humour! Hope your leg and your knee and poor Jason's sensibilities get better soon.
I rolled on the floor laughing hysterically at this post.
And I felt bad for you at the same time.
You have talent my friend.
I carry the wrong stuff in my purse. If I'm ever going to learn to crap in public, I've got to be prepared.
I hate to shave!!!
I use the nair crap, then do a go over of I need too!!
And poor Jason, I hope there were some video cams around and he can press charges on this lady!
I don't even know how to respond to all that except, wow, glad it wasn't me (yeah, I'm really sympathetic). What a crappy (hah!) day. Hope it gets better soon.
She POOPED in the dressing room?!?!?!
Thanks for using shat, people don't use that word enough.
Jay..you can't fly.
1. So what was the score from the judges on the high dive? From the description, it sounds like an 8 at least, though you obviously didn't stick the landing.
2. What a prick! Most cops would have merely told him to go renew his license.
3. Ouch!
4. WTF. That's just plain nasty. What is with some people?
Well, even if the landing was painful, at least you can brag that you know how to fly?
Aw, I feel your pain with the police. Seriously, what is their deal of late?
Waxing, not good. When, oh, when will we evolve away unwanted hair?
Gross, gross, gross!!! What the fuck is wrong with people!!?!?!!
Hey Jay.
Email me, I can give you legal advice.
nii-iiice..
Gutted on the ticket front, even more gutted about the knee mishap - giggling like a nutter over Jason's work day though - she must've been on meds.
Holy, well, shit.
Hope your knee gets better soon and I hope your luck improves drastically!
1. You're a good friend
2. ow
3. damn
4. ow
5. ew
I had a poop incident too! I used to work at a "Super Store" and was summoned to my fitting room. If it wasn't nasty enough that they took a dump they did it on the floor, the bottoms of my fitting room were open so you could see peoples feet. I got this mental image of a bare butt hanging down there doin' it's thing. I don't understand why people behave like that.
I hope you heal up soon. It sounds like your legs have taken quite a beating! Take care!
Poor Jason, that is absolutely disgusting that someone took a dump in the fitting room. If they took such care in doing so (the double sheets of white paper/tissues) why couldn't they make it to the bathroom or clean it up themselves or something. ICK!
Hope your knee is feeling better!
Oh, and I forgot to say: Jason's colleague, whose english is not good, screwed up his vacation, and now we have to wait a whole extra week!
Ah well, lots of silly things happen, but all in all we're lucky and we know it. I mean, we entertained the whole emergency ward for 4 hours straight - how bad can life be?
So did they catch the woman? And if so, can you arrest someone for taking a crap on the floor?
Sounds like you guys both need a bunch of beers. Feel better!
wow. that is so disgusting and distrubing I may never try on clothes again.
And I hope you are feeling better!
I'm still trying to understand how you can nick your nipple while shaving your armpit.....
Really though, only 2 words can really sum up this post:
'Ew' and 'Ow'.
I read your razor story and I had to tell you that I almost did the exact same thing. I had a nick in my fingernail that took forever to grow out. I can't imagine if I had actually made it through to skin. I shudder thinking of it.
P.S. I can't imagine what makes someone think that pooping in a dressing room would be a good time. It sounds like she came prepared with the paper and all, so I wonder if she had done if before.
How did he know whose it was? Did he take samples of everyone in the store? Because seriously, they can't pay enough for that shit... LITERALLY.
Okay, number 4 makes we want to puke. Are people like that human. Maybe she has a major mental deficiency. Gross! That sucks about your wax job. I have never had my legs waxed and now I'll just continue to shave. Ugh!
That is just WAY too much shit to put up with in one week. I hope you're really okay. Cracked head, dislocated knee and bleeding leg abrasions? That's it, you've had all the bad luck you can have this year. Jason too. You're home free now.
Ooh, love the goat pic. You know, you and the mister live quite interesting lives. So I'm gathering Mr. Miyagi wasn't telling the full story when he said, 'Wax on. Wax off.'
That sounds like a horrid day!!! I'm so sorry that the salon people were so bad to you...mine are the best, of course then again, my aesthetician (aka torturer) acts like a mother to me...which in and of itself is a strange thing.
yep, its quota time, saw all the cops on 95 last night.
Eeeeeeewwwwww.... I was going to comment about you poor things getting fined for no good reason and then read the poopy story.... Eeeeeew again.
oh god that reminds me of when I used to work in a sandwich bar and one day someone diahroeahed on the wall. It seemed physically impossible, the angles, the texture.
Luckily I left it for someone else to clean as well. Some people are seriously sick.
Nicked her nipple!?! OUCH! I'm in all sorts of sympathetic pains, and my memory is seared. Yikes.
I know, Iknow, it'll haunt you forever.
Well, you've certainly put perspecive on what I formerly considered a bad day. I'm so ashamed.
I hope your knee feels better, and I think you should sue the waxing salon. I've never been waxed (I'm a wimp) but the incident was NOT your fault. The person who did it should be working on farm vehicles, not human flesh. You would be doing a service to their future customers.
The poop incident is just too horrible to express adequately. All I can offer is more ewwwwww's to add to your vast collection.
Oh My i dont even like to pooh in a public restroom, how could she do that!
No, I'm actually extremely sensitive, so I guess it's not surprising that my skin reacted that way. It sucks though - I was looking forward to life without my lady bic.
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