Talk to the Goat
Ironically, we've just been through sexual harrassment training at my company. They didn't teach us about the thumb tack penis on a cork board though.
It's times like these that I'm glad I don't have an office job.
hahahah...ohh this made me laugh 
thanks jamie.
And I of course work in an office with two other women...i'm of course, never there.
I love the idea of cubicle feng shui
You have just written the BEST OFFICE POST EVER! You can I could cause lots of havoc if we worked together!!!
I haven't worked in an office since I took a semester off from school. This reminds me why I don't! LOL
Your office is the illegitimate child of a Disney cartoon and “Office Space,” isn’t it?
When I did temp work, my desk had an empty name holder. The empty name holder mocked me, because instead of my name, or even someone else’s name, there was nothing. So I trimmed a piece of paper to the right size, stuck it in the name holder with “I’m not really here, I’m just the temp!” printed in light blue marker.
That was my coping mechanism.
So this is what life working in a cubicle is like. I'm enjoying your writing. Thanks for stopping by my place and your comment.
You had TWENTY Bics on your desk?
I'm so fucking jealous... and I don't even work at my hell hole job anymore.
Your job sounds much more entertaining than mine. Or maybe you just have a much better imagination. Or both :P
If you had worked where I worked, we both would have been arrested. Because it was an elementary school. But, damn, we would have had fun.
What a wonderful journey through cubicle life. I smiled and almost laughed (symptom of said cubicle life) several times.
I'm 37 and didn't have a cubicle until I was 33. Maybe working for a smaller company was better, after all.
Then again, my "office" at one job was a desk in a computer room. Still, being surround by computers was better than this.
Pen on a string? That's just crazy enough to work! I may have to try that.
Everyone here seems to know my name too and I've really no idea, really. It certainly couldn't have anything to do with the departmental convention four weeks ago, or the Christmas dinner, or the one Friday evening a month social thingy. Or really any event where they serve copious amounts of free alcohol.......
I dont know about that one since I dont work outside the home anymore. The only way people knew my name was when I lived at home. My home town is about 8,000 people.
The office cubicle. What a life!
work entertaining? you're sick girl. sick
Here's the key to surviving office work.
Sniffing markers. I have this Sharpie permanent marker and it makes all the bad things so away. The problem is my marker is loosing it's effect the that HR person won't give me another one.
We'll see what happens the next time she needs toner for her printer.
I love those little rubber duckies (and strongly encourage using them for cubicle decor)! I went through a phase where I purchased them for a friend...it all started with Hanukkah rubber duckies...then there was the breast cancer ducky, which she threw out because it actually said on the label that it could cause cancer...and finally the valentine's day rubber ducky. After that one, she politely asked me not to purchase any more duckies for her and recommended candles instead.
I'm not mocking you...it's more of an old-fashioned taunt.
This is the third office related blog I've read today. It is the strangest. I suppose somebody has an award for strange office relate blog entries. In which case you win.
The cubicles are in place because they want you to work hard so you can get one of the offices on the outside of the cubes ... I swear this must be the case!
I should freshen up my cube - add pictures of my wife, friends, etc., and maybe get one of those little fountains, but I'm just not motivated to do so ... besides, that would make me want to stay there longer ...
My husband and I work from an office at home and the sexual harrassment is terrible!
That would be ME in your computer watching you undress...
only imagine such things.
And Juanita is such a fun name to say.
I used to have to take all kinds of sexual harassment classes in the Air Guard (I guess I harassed too many people) and they never taught us about the thumbtack penii either. Maybe they're OK.
I've heard it's good cubicle Feng Shui to put a pongee stick trap right outside the entrance to your cubie to keep away unwanted mangers. But you must, of course, remember it's there yourself!
Here's a decoration for your cubie.
http://www.accoutrements.com/pro...ucts/
11545.html
I don't have to worry about knocking all the pens over at work, they always mysteriously disappear just when I'm about to pick one up when I need one. Of course it's always "Not me!" that took them all.
We have yet to make a thumbtack penis in our office, but we have made a couple of rubber band balls.
We have an office ho too, and frankly we're all tired of seeing the tattoo just above her butt cheeks. The male customers however, probably love it.
The guy who was blamed for, uh...I mean credited with inventing the cubicle died last year. He was said to have been appalled at the use of his invention. He had just been trying to make an efficient work station that would be ergonomic and make life easier for people.
I truly dilike cubicles. Who wants an office you can't fool around in?? Thumbtacks and Penis..that just doesn't sound like a good mix Jay!!
Bics on the ground is the best possible outcome you could hope for. Firstly, PickupBics, the coolest new game, is sweeping the nation. Secondly, you can waste as much time as you want down there picking them up because nobody can see you. What a great way to waste the day, under your desk. It's 17.3 times better than being blamed for low sales because the department you're NOT in charge of didn't sell their share.
Which brings me to a great, age-old question: how do braindead people whose IQs are so low they can barely clothe themselves somehow manage to become, well, managers and such?
Very entertaining post! But tell me... You guys still work in cubicles? I mean, we have open space offices or shared ofices, but I probably have more space than you and 4 other work colleagues! Hell, I can even spill coffee on my own computer without damaging anyboy else's goods.
I too decorate my space ... pix, stuffed animals, etc. Sad, really sad!
I have recently decorated the entrance to my office with anti-personnel devices. I expect to cut the time wasting visit rate by at least half, as many of the idiots will not heed the sign warning of impending mutilation. Of course McKinsey have advised me on this strategy, they do come in handy at times.
BB
P.S. I got the horn reading your other blog, whoa!
lol
It's nice to catch up
From Essential Vocabulary For The Workplace:
6. PRAIRIE DOGGING: When someone yells or drops something loudly in a
cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's
going on.
Pens begin to covertly migrate the minute they come into my posession. They're often eventuallly found, huddled together for company, in some out of the way, and un-pennish location. Behind a potted plant, for instance, or lying slyly in a drawer among the table knives.
it's been a couple decades since i've worked in a cubicle..
but that was in a rather small office and i was grateful for my little cubicle. nobody could see me falling asleep over my electric typewriter because i was partying so much the night before.
Oh, the thumb tack penis is a-moving...
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