The Theological Ruminator
John Mark,
I would attend a gay wedding if you ever remarry.
Danno the Manno.
Clearly, "Danno the Manno" is Matt Moore's pseudopigraphal penname, which he enjoys employing in order to draw hesitant blog commentors into the conversation.
No I'm not.
#1 There are a lot of issues here, but I would probably not attend. Being from a more conservative background, wedding attendance (to me) carries an idea of endorsement, of being a member of a corporate body of witnesses to a sacred and legal ceremony. If I can't be silent when the clergy asks for objections (regardless of whether or not they actually ask this quesion), then I would rather not attend.
#2 For the same reason mentioned above, I would not attend.
You guys are nuts!
I can understand where you guys are coming from on the issue of how it looks like you're giving a seal of approval on it".
It would depend on how well I know that person in how I dealt with the issue. Thinking out loud here... I wonder what Jesus would do. If it were a close friend of his, I think he'd go. He's might make his feelings known to the couple ahead of time in a gentle manner. Something like "Hey guys I want you to know I love you very much, but I really think you're relationship is not what God wants for you. It doesn't diminish my love for you, and I'm going to go to your wedding because I want to show that I care about you."
Jesus went to people's houses for dinner and that's something really similar. That was looked upon as a sign of approval, communing with those people. He didn't really care what the onlookers thought though. He cared about the people he was dining with.
I agree with Brian. I have so gay friends who's wedding I think I would go to...though I really don't know and couldn't say until the moment came.
What if a gay marries a lesbian?
Matt, I don't know if I could deal with that one! 
Good points guys. I personally am kind of with Brian and Matt on this one (though I think Dan has some good points). I think Brian put it well in saying it depends on how well he knew the person. I also think that Jesus dining with these people in their homes was a very similar though not exact cultural equivalent.
Any more thoughts?
I would just like to clarify my earlier comment. I said that "I have so gay friends"...I meant to say that "I have some gay friends." On reflection, though, they can all be pretty gay, so maybe "so gay" is appropriate.
I don't know, I went to a restaraunt the other night and they sure appeared to cater to gluttony. I didn't really think about whether I supported gluttony by being there.
Are the only sins the Western church truly stands against sexual in nature?
I would go. I'd prefer to err on the side of relationship. Anybody that I know that would ask me to something like this already knows my position (and believe me, this is not an academic exercise for me!). I lose by not going and I gain even more by going.
Just don't ask me to perform the ceremony!
If a brother or sister in Christ confided in me, letting me know that they planned to commit some sin, at some particular time, (no, it doesn't have to be a sexual sin), and then asked me to attend, what would be the most loving response? Certainly, the first course is to graciously protest the planned act. However, if that is insufficient to dissuade the individual, what does my agreeing to attend their "sin time" accomplish? I contradict my plea by attending. Jesus eating with sinners, or going to a resturant, are inadequate analogies. Besides, the implied assumption that the relationship would be aborted is unknowable. One could easily imagine a situation in which your consistent protest would actually improve the relationship, and pave the way for future ministry. Certainly after the deed is done, I am not advocating shunning the individuals. Once they are married, I will do everything I can to help. However, attendance is support of the act itself.
Roy - good point. (ha, never thought i'd hear myself say that... just kidding) Anybody here ever buy anything made in China? Shop at walmart? You're supporting child labor and the persecution of Christians. You're supporting the United States' double standard with trade practices. You're actively voting for it with your $$
Dan, good points to chew on there...
I'd say the Jesus eating with sinners analogy still holds up. It seems like difference is made in what kind of relationship you have with the people in question. If they know your stance on the issue, then they'll understand that you're there not to support the activity but because you care about them as a person.
Those who looked at Jesus eating with sinners said "what's he doing there? He's eating with sinners, he approves of what they do". They probably thought he was a hypocrite. The people he actually ate with though, they knew better.
It's a difficult dance. If the people don't understand your stance on the issue they'll think you are endorsing it. If they do understand that you dont approve and you decide not to go, it could drive them away from the faith rather than to it. They could think "those legalistic christians, where's the love".
I'd rather err on the side of loving and being mistaken for being incorrect than the side of being super correct and being mistaken for not loving.
It's a very tricky situation, because I'm sure the point you're coming from is that you are demonstrating your love by protesting in hopes that they'll "come around".
Well said, Brian.
Interesting question...In reference to Brian's last statement, it seems as though regardless of what you would do in this situation, that both views are desiring to demonstrate love in "hopes they will come around." I don't think we can know which is more likely to "change" them. I also don't think we can claim to know what Christ would do in this situation due to this fact. In the Bible to the hard hearted he was firm and seemingly unloving and to those who had broken, humble, contrite hearts he showed grace and forgiveness. Only God knows the condition of people's hearts and only he can change hearts, so it's seems whatever we do we ought to proceed with caution.
Yeah, Diedra! Thanks for the comments! I agree very much with that last statement of yours.
Sorry for the delay--I just got back from dinner at Fat Burger and an evening at Wal-Mart.
Brian, I wish I had said it like you did. That was outstanding. But I'm not used to anybody agreeing with me. It's making me more than a little uncomfortable . . .
Diedre, you're going to put the WWJD people out of business! Good thoughts and a wise caution.
You know, this isn't even a question for me if the people involved are unbelievers. I go. I really don't care to fix or take a stand on whatever specific sin they are involved in. And where this issue touches my life this scenario covers it.
But Dan brought up a good point. Should this change if the people are believers?
I agree with Roy, I'm totally there if the people are unbelievers. However, I don't agree with his spelling of Diedra's name.
OK, that's enough. Two people saying they agree with me on the same thread. How can I live with that? I think subconsciously I spelled Deidra's name wrong so that Dan couldn't completely agree with me!
Sorry Diedra.
hmm..so i've thought a lot about it and i don't think i would go, but mostly because i get really weirded out seeing two guys kiss. i don't really every think of myself as a homophobe, but i'd feel creepy. i agree with dan too in that it does look like you're supporting gay marriage. i think i know what i'd do, though you'll see how it's obviously flawed. i'm pretty sure i'd make up an excuse about being out of town or something. man, i'm lame. super-lame. as for walmart, what's wrong with child labor?...and walmart actually does some great things economically if you ever study the company and stuff like that...though i'm sure that i'm the only one who has a copy of the latest The Economist in my house. i don't mean to sound snobbish, but i bet i'm right. hey, walmart even turned around arkansas...
Matt,
That's just sad... :-(
what's sad?
i just shopped at the new walmart neighborhood market.
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