Walking Circumspectly
SO GOOD TO SEE YOU BACK, friend. Love you.
Parenting = humbling. For everyone in different ways, but I think that's one of the major ways God works through our kids. He uses them and our interactions with them to show us how much we don't know. About Him, about ourselves, about all those parents than whom we always figured we could do better.
My goodness, that was an awkward phrase. (now you know it's really me.)
I was wondering where you'd gone off to. Now I see it was the Land that I visited when my first was born, almost 6 years ago. Glad to hear you're pulling out of it, by His grace. I agree; no matter how brilliant we are beforehand, it's amazing how much we DON'T know after the birth of our own kids.
Aren't hormones fun??
Yeah. 
It's sooooo good to hear from you!
I've spent a lot of time lately understanding I really don't know anything. Fortunately my Father knows everything--so I am just trying to trust Him to provide. I found He's extremely faithful!!
Enjoy your family!!!
So glad to see you back! Motherhood is a whole new ground that you have to relearn how to walk on. I was completely arrogant before I had kids, and God humbled me pretty quickly after 
Hang in there, He will help you get your footing soon.
Blessings,Emily Gunn
Hi Kristen,
I'm so glad to hear from you, and you do sound good, in spite of your struggles. A dear friend of mine here locally dealt with postpartum depression with her first three babies (did end up going on meds), but then was fine with her fourth baby. She's shared with me in depth about it, and it certainly is a complex, tough thing to face. I will continue to pray for you and family. And no, you are not alone.
I know what you mean about feeling paralyzed emotionally, and in a place from which it's hard to write much. I find myself there alot it seems. I often am frustrated at my inability to really verbalize my thoughts on various issues that once upon a time I felt so sure of, but find the Lord re-shaping with added insight... He's sure softened alot of edges. We were joking about this at our last Bible study class, concerning doctrinal dogma. heh!
Motherhood sure has been a tool by which the Holy Spirit teaches me daily to depend upon Him more and more. Like you said, parents must seek the Lord for themselves as to how He would have them lead their little lambs, each one even being so individual and different than the next. No, there's no formula, nor book that will fit every family. But I just try to remember that He gave us these children, and He will provide all of the Grace and Wisdom we need to parent them, and that as a family, we will mess up, but He teaches us from that as well.
And rest assured that children are resilient... and so long as they know you love 'em, they'll survive alot of our messing up! LOL Chris and I have found ourselves apologizing to our kids numerous times, and they're always so gracious about it. Yes, parenting certainly does (well, should) bring humility.
Anyways, sorry to go on and on here. I wish that you were close enough that I could come over there and give you a big hug and just sit and chat a spell... So sorry you've been having a rough start, and thankful to hear that your coming out of the fog. It's a most blessed journey you've begun, Momma!
(((love & hugs)))
Kristen,
So glad to see an update from you and my heart goes out to you. It sounds like your situation has been much more challenging than mine, but from one new mom to another... Hugs!
Sallie
I'm so glad you're back! I keep on checking your blog and it's great to hear from you again.
((HUGE HUG))
Woooo, Kristen is back!! If there was nothing here today, I was thinking that you'd probably decided to give blogging the flick and thinking that I probably should update my blogroll. How's that for timing?! Welcome back, even sporadically. So glad to hear you're coming "up out" in your struggles...
Hey Kristen!
You may not remember me, but I started reading your blog not long before you became pregnant. I was wondering how everything was going!
Isn't that always the way? The Lord does a flip turn with the way we view things and the opinions we hold? It is always good to hold ideas in the palm of one's hand, I guess.
Looking forward to hearing more when you are up to it.
love, Valerie
I feel my whole christian experience is like that. The things I know now make me look back at the man of yesterday and think "man what an arrogant prig: it's just the old man wearing religious clothes!"
Welcome back.
Kristin! Glad to "see" you again And I'm glad you're coming out of the ppd. My wife went through something akin to it after our 2nd daughter was born, and it's not at all a pleasant thing. I'll keep you in my prayers as you will be adjusting to the parenting thing for the next, oh, forever. But it's truly a blessed thing.
As to opinions, don't be afraid to have 'em. God gave us minds to use. Just keep centered on Him and the rest falls into place. You can know much while remaining humble before your God. After all, He's the source of truth. What we know is from Him anyway.
God bless,
Ron
(((HUGS))) I'm so glad to see you back! I was the same way... so opinionated on childbirth, parenting... you name it.
It's been a painful process over the years as God has been stripping that away. I think it's 'cause he wants us to trust in Him alone and not some method or idea.
PPD is no fun, but I'm glad that God is using even this painful thing in your life. My baby is almost a year old and it's only recently that I feel that I'm starting to get back to normal.
Anyway, give that cutie a big kiss on that sweet fuzzy head!
Hey Kristen,
So glad to have you back. I have heard some horror stories about postpartum depression and let me tell you how relieved I am to hear that you've come out of it alive and well. I'm praying that you will continue to feel better. It's so good to hear from you.
Kristen, it is so good to see a new post from you! Ppd is nothing to laugh at. How grateful I am that you are pulling out of it. I had a dear friend go through it after the birth of her first child. Not fun.
I look forward to reading you again whenever you do have time to post. It warms my heart to think how faithful our Lord is to see us through our difficult times.
I have been thinking about you so much these last few months! I wish I had acted on those thoughts and dropped you a line or two. ALl I can offer by way of excuse is that this pregnancy has kicked my tail, as we Georgia girls can say
I'm so glad to hear you're feeling better - it's like coming out of a fog, isn't it? For me it's just a part of having a baby. I'm on some kind of "high" for the first month, maybe two and then everything just gets so hard! When you add to that the whole figuring out how to be a mother thing... Well, it ain't easy
We've got to get together sometime!
Lots of love! And prayers!
Oh, I'm so glad you're back! There's something about your posts that always speaks to my heart. No matter how often or seldom you post, your thoughts are worth waiting for. God bless you, your husband and your new baby.
Hi Kristen! It is so great to hear from you! I am due in 4 days now with my third blessing. Have a blessed Sunday!
Thank you all so much. I was pretty shocked to see any comments! I figured you'd all probably given up on me a few months ago.
I continue to be amazed at how this forum (blogging) allows Christians to support and befriend one another. Certainly the internet has its downsides, but you are proof that it has its wonderful aspects as well.
Hey, Kristen! Good to see you're still alive and functioning.
I'm back from a blogging hiatus myself... although probably for different reasons. I've just really felt the need to put some of these thoughts down in print -- mostly for my own benefit. Hope it helps for you as well.
Dear Kristen,
Welcome back (big hugs sent across the net). I missed you so much. I'm so glad you're back, and that God has been faithful to you through your recent trials.
This motherhood thing keeps me humbled again and again. I think we all struggle in different ways. I will look forward to every single post from you, no matter how infrequent. You just post as you are ready to, and we'll be here.
LOTS of Love!!
Welcome back, Kristen.
I was thinking about you especially a lot today. I'm so sorry you've been having such a rough time. Wish I could be there to help somehow.
Ease back into blogging... no rush. Take care of yourself, your husband and that sweet little child.
Much love,
Ruthanne
Welcome back Kristen! I sure have missed your posts!
I totally relate to you and know all about depression. Me and God have been battling my clinical depression for a couple of years now and it's hard.
We will never fully get this parenting thing but in it we will see glimpses of God in ways that you can never imagine. You go through periods where you think you finally figured it out but then you fall right back on your butt again and realize you really know nothing at all.
Being a parent is the hardest job in the world. BUT its also the most delicious and rewarding job in the universe.
Enjoy the ride.
xoxox
Oh Kristen!
I've been checking every couple of weeks or so to see if you'd posted... so glad to see you back!
What you describe is exactly what happened with me after the birth of my second. Like you, I didn't go on any medication. UNlike you, I didn't realize at the time what was going on and I feel like I lost so much time.
Thinking of and praying for you and your family!
Hi Kristen,
Glad you wrote something I wanna see Noah. Can you post a picture soon?
Thinking of you!
Nice to see you back no matter how choppy. It's rough to deal with those hormones even when you know what it is, it is just overwhelming, but God is good even when you are walking in darkness and see no light. It is so reassuring to know that He is there to stay your hope on. And yes, everything goes out the window when you finally have that sweet little thing of your own.
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