One wonders what the crew of the good ship MUA would say to funding a junket of yuppy, hippy scum.
Test some missiles by taking out their Peace convergence.
Well, Thankyou Andrews ( and Landeryou) for this enlightening article.
For the record, I'm the Secretary of the Monash Student Association and will not be voting for this external funding application.
But that does not mean I do not support their right to apply for funding and have their application reviewed by the Monash Student Council.
Porter calm down its not going to get up at Council, did you get excited about your little scandal?
MUA & MSA Hey? What shall we do with the drunken sailors...
Porter you are so sad! Why would you leak this when you know yourself it will never get up at MSC? Surely you've got something better to do than leak sensationalist garb!
Sam, love the faux Voltaire-'disagree with application, defend to death right to make it'. Gold. But don't take yourself too seriously....
As for naming and shaming people, I think you'll find the MSA leaks from many places. I would hardly consider Porter 'involved' in the MSA in a traditional sense.
Why Hilakari hasn't named himself is beyond me. Or Edwards, for that matter. Too busy recovering from her own little 'scandal' in The Oz last week?
Porter is as involved as it gets in the MSA - he's on executive!
Kastelan, Hilakari (of course it was him) and Steele - true Monash Patriots.
for the record Haydn Steel does not have an E on the end of his name!
Perhaps it was the ghost of Con Helas, then?
like Con Helas can get any creepier
He should always be referred to as Neo-Con
oh constantinos
Fat chance this will get through MSC.
Hey maybe we should let the hippies go up north our fighting men need some live targets to aim at
Why are we assuming that this has anything to do with Porter given that Karl Tracksdorf was so keen to kill this same proposal of in students affairs committee maybe we should consider that it was this notorious defector from labor right. If any one on that union has form for rating out his faction buddies it’s him
Con’s evil flat nose is up everything is not and why must he and his lackeys continue to slander the only descent liberal on this campus the loveable beer baron Haydn. Oh con when will you relies that your brand of hate is not wanted anymore
Why would any one even consider anything said by someone wearing a tie dyed shirt
Going out on a limb there, saying that Karl has factional buddies. He's been accused of many things, but never this- it's a vile and odious lie.
'Surely you've got something better to do than leak sensationalist garb!'
By contrast, you're far too busy accusing people of leaking clothes...
I will now randomly accuses both Jaffy Simon and Jaffy Mark.
Their I can do it to
i accuse the budding beer baron of being awesome!
I blame their parents for not hugging them enough as kids
Karl Tracksdorf is a fine, young man and definitely not a traitor. The only “crime” he’s committed is waking up to the fact the right faction are a bunch of useless, corrupt, idiotic morons.
This mere accusation makes baby Jesus cry.
Oh, and Jafffy Mark is hot.
Tracksdorfs! You are trapped, like rats of Tobruk!
Well the latest I heard around the corridors of power at monash is that Mr. Matt 9 Face Hilakari has being leaking this story to further his plans to take over the left faction at monash. Porter has nothing to do with all this its just the left fighting for power.
Yes, Jafffy Mark is hot!
Tracksdorf is a fantastic guy! His values are truer to the Labor party than any of those Unity creeps. Karl rocks! Even if he's German and has a thing for Lizzy.
I Further I accuses the radio active monkeys that live in between the 7th and 8th floor of the Menzies
Jafffy Mark 4 PM
When will the left wake up and relies that people like Porter have better things to do than piss about on issues of the dirty left. Why would anyone waste their time on such a stupid issue this is clearly a power struggle in the left
Why do we taxes payers money on a good cause like finding a cure for the common Hippie.
Sorry I ment to say Why don’t we uses taxes payers money on a good cause like finding a cure for the common Hippie.
Today’s actions are just a big diversion by the left to try and hold on to their one power spot left. They are blaming Porter just to distract from their own factional fighting and the fact that this year they will have to scrape the bottom of the barrel in order to hang on to monash bring on the true patriots.
It was me! By me I mean Karl. Offer me a piece of cheese and I am anyone's. In fact, I like cheese so much I think that the MSA ought to fund me to go to a camembert conference. So there.
P.S. Did I mention that I like cheese?
I like cheese too.
Has no one considered this years Lot's Wife editors (Dara Conduit and Naomi Snell) may be responsible for this leak? Surely their track record speaks for itself. I bet they are utterly offended that in all this finger pointing they were not implicated. Particularly given that most of their (less important) factional buddies rated a mention. For the record I doubt it was them.
(Porter!)
filthy pinkos
in other news, the shoalwater application was declined by the Monash Student Council to do, not even in principle support was granted. Kudos on such a wise decision MSC.
my last comment made no sense, it was meant to say "monash student council". the to do part was just my mind working overtime.
I love the fact none of these accusations make any sense! Hooray for finger pointing and bitterness!
The Andrew Porter accusation makes lots of sense. Go! should not have been so stupid to give him a position on exec. As a result, Go! deserves all that they get from that lunatic
The photo is the cast of 'Hair'starring (from left) Joni Mitchell, Janis Joplin, Jimi Hendrix and Carly Simon
Apparently Go! are stupid for giving a patriot a position on exec...
I find that reasoning rather restrictive. I'd have thought they were stupid for any other number of reasons. If I were going to accuse anyone on exec of being a lunatic- thy name is Hilakari.
Do you have any evidence to back up your wild accusations? or should I just be acusseing you of being a fascist!
OK, the Porter accusation, fair enough but Tracksdorf? Hilakari? That's just ridiculous.
After a line of questioning from student unity and the libs, it emerged that Hilikari was trying obtain external grant funding for a group not containing Monash students.
On his brother's behalf.
And that of a union affiliated with Labor's Socialist Left.
Fascism, hey?
This is classic. A member of the Monash Student Council attempts to garner fudning to engage in criminal behaviour, another seeks funding for his brother's LHMU junkets and the best the muppets at the MSA can do is try and point the bone at whoever the informant was. If this is the most important factor, rather than the actual behaviour complained of, it does rather beg the question, who told on Stalin then?
Oh Con and Con's groupie...bitter bitter bitter. Shouldn't you guys be at some random bathhouse right now?
Hilikari was speaking on behalf of the applicant, who was NOT from the LHMU in fact. and the application was denied lacking direct benefit to clayton students. There is no issue with people applying, whoever they may be, the proper procedures will be followed, and the correct outcomes will hopefully follow.
Yes anon, 11.34am. But you forgot to mention that we will all also dance a merry jig before travelling across the rainbow to watch pigs fly while we eat fairy dust. It is all in your standing orders.
well anon 11:36am, did the correct outcomes not ensue?
I dunno, are you jigging?
I'm always dancing a merry jig.
Con!!!!
It’s time to choose, either marry me or the future Mr. Con Hellas. I’d make such a good Janette to your John.
Agreement with Anon | 05.30.07 - 12:45 am | # . A stupid and irresponsible decision from Go!
Yes, because having all members of one faction is of course the only sensible way to run the executive of a student union.
Melbourne, anyone?
Can't believe that there are idiots from the left out there attacking a member of the right at Monash...from the right. Particularly when they purport to dislike 'fascists'. Lefy, heal thyself.
Lefty, heal thyself too 
Perhaps the problem is not what faction comes from but the loose kind of repulsive creature that he is. I would like to pass a motion condemning Go! for their dealings with him.
No need to get personal, anon.
The Monash tovarishci should all calm down, relax and solve their differences openly, rather than resorting to anonymous slander.
Now....about that cheese?
Con, get yourself elected rather than criticising Porter under an assumed name.
Remove your hand from that puppet Hopewell, too, you nosey creature.
If I was Con Helas I wouldnt be sticking my enormous cheese carving nose into anything political at the moment. You know you have made the big time when you get done over by MX, where all of the prize winning journalism belongs.
Calling Con Hellas' nose large is unfair. Besides, the planning permit only describes it as light commercial.
Vic how about a pasta and merlot at Short Black?
Remember that young blonde waitress with the mini skirt?
I think we need to help the Party, we must chat they are failing without us?
Fifi says Hi she is feeling happy today after geeting into China John last night!!
Short Black sounds good. We can then wlak arond Richmond and see if we can spot that funny guy, Prodos.
I never forget young blonde waitresses wearing a mini-skirt.
The Party certainly needs our help.
Good to see Fifi letting rip with the motion of non confidence against the Lord Mayor.
Bobby, between you and me, I don't have that much confidence in Fifi either.
I agree Vic, she is not that flash if she was looking after the purse it would all go on cheap plonk.
But I am down on my luck in regards to Skirt at the moment and the nights are getting colder.
The phone hasn't rung either in regard to Directorships either.
Lets go find that Waitress?
Karl Tracksdorf 4 deputy PM!
Karl Tracksdorf is also a rodent.
Who’s willing to pool some money and get Flick over so we can exterminate the MLA?
If Andrew (both of them) and Con wont fuck me I might as well fuck Karl. So, how about it? I can cover myself in camembert...
Um, stuff is just getting weird now...
Quite so.
Even I wouldn't go *that* far.
God damn porter you are just so sad! There are so many legitimate ways to discredit these people but you have to run with this grant application which of course was denied and end up looking like an ass yourself! How stupid can you get!!
The Story: "Accidental Councillor".
Elected on a feeder ticker - 'Free Parking' - because of a confusing ballot paper with two lines of "above the line voting", he did not contribute in any way to his own election. Upon polling week, the large (not so jolly) soul was nowhere to be seen. Did not campaign for one single minute, unlike other patriots not running, who were more than obliging to spare their time for the broader anti-leftist cause.
The man doesn't know the meaning of hard work. You wouldn't know it from speaking to the guy though, his pomposity and arrogance would have you believe he was a real player and deserving of his spot on the Council. Sadder was how patriots from the Jewish Students' Society and other moderate Labor factions missed out.
Rumour has it the man sees himself as the next Convenor of Young Labor Unity...The first step towards his long stated aim of "rolling Nicola Roxon", perhaps? For a man involved for just over a year to date, and not even on the Executive of Young Labor, it's quite the leap, but when one is blessed with the talent, drive and determination of , such conventions are merely small obstacles easily navigated.
The truth? The deluded soul is the subject of many a joke from all sides of politics, who laugh at the ever expanding size of the man's ego.
in pomposity and arrogance,
the biographer.
Poetic. But there is one factual element that has been glimpsed over in this whole story.
That being, that the Action organisers, probably your bitter self by the sounds of things, neglected to withdraw the feeder ticket from the elections.
With such an amateurish error, one deserves the bitterness that follows from such events.
Ah, that old chestnut. Really takes us all back.
Let me tell you all a story about a campus election, back in the year 2006. A time when the messiah reigned over the (then) sunlit uplands of NUS. A time when an equally up and coming member of the right was a campus President.
And lo! As many hands make light work, the Gen Sec of NUS and his able (can't resist- trusty, too) Lieutenant sought to wrest control of Monash Clayton from the left. Rounding up a posse of reluctant fellow travellers, the boys- nay, men- put together a ticket so confident in their campaigning and planning abilities that...hold on a minute...no-one from their faction wanted to be involved.
One was offered President, but wisely declined. One agreed to run for Welfare, but that had been promised to one whose ambition and ability has strangely not been mentioned on this blog, and one who brings all together in their shared admiration- madame networker. A figure worthy of this blog, a figure comparable to the Member for Indi in her abilities and vision for this great nation. A figure to unite all of us.
So, as the dysfunctional posse failed to support their wise and, it must be said, dear leaders, said leaders revealed their true plan all along- to give all the OB spots on the ticket to those who would actually listen to them. People not from their faction.
A tactical masterstroke, their pièce de résistance, a move of such ingenuity that it took everyone by surprise (not least the fact that it enraged, unbeknownst to them, virtually their entire faction- added to an increasingly large ball of string). An unmitigated success, demonstrating their unrivalled electioneering nous, matched only by their other campaign coups- getting kicked off campus, and fraudlently registering one of themselves as a candidate. Oh dear.
With the inimitable erstwhile Gen Sec (there seems to be a pattern of election success, hard work, and untold ability emerging here) as Blackadder to Berwick's Baldrick, their cunning plan could surely only succeed. Uninhibited by lesser souls such as Porter and Poulter, the dream team fought valiantly, and carried the day.
Oh no? What's that? They didn't? Well, surely it would be some consolation to them that one of their factional brethren was elected to the MSC. But you'd be mistaken. Because Blackadder and Baldrick were (playing golf is what the conventional wisdom is) that day, they couldn't withdraw Porter. And has the gall to insist that he withdraw his spot and- wait for it- give it to a competing faction. More's the pity that they can't read standing orders or constitutions.
Ironically, these are the same people who accused him of being a 'rat' for managing to secure an exec spot this year, something they would not have come close to accomplishing.
But hey, never let the truth get in the way of a good story. We should all give homage to the dauphin for his brilliance- and his modesty and truthfulness while we're at it
you are a XXXX
Patriots, I have made a decree.
Slagging each other off by name shall cease.
Slag off leftists by all means. But slagging off each other by name is "not cool."
Transgressors shall be IP banned or personally visited by the OC Spiritual Health guidance counsellors.
I have spoken.
Game on.
Please do not end the enjoyment of us socialisst and filthy pinkos. Things were just getting interesting.
C'mon Andrew please give them a bit longer. No one has mentioned Claudia by name or hair yet.
Funny how you only decided to say that now when got dissed, considering how much flack K has copped. Hmmm coincidence? I think not.
Anyway, I will abide by these new rules and offer you guys some big bowls of strawberry ice cream so we can sort out our problems.
Meanwhile dropping the c bomb on such a blog is not cool.
Please note the word "dauphin", when used disrespectfully, is also banned.
I have spoken.
Game on.
Can we say endorphin??
This is a message for the Future Mr. Landeryou/Hellas/Karl.
I am sick of you on my turf, I know who you are and I’ve declared war. Handbags at nine paces on the Menzies lawn at dawn. Winner gets to move to Utah with all three of them and live in polygamous harmony, loser gets leftover camembert.
Game on moll!!
As much as being labelled the "messiah" is both flattering and ego-boosting this blog isn't the forum to air internal gripes. Which that post descended into (following it's eloquent opening...).
I'm not going to respond, it's not appropriate. Isn't the ethos of this blog to "bring socialist crooks down"? Not each other.
That painfully long post was yours, Mr Porter, I have no doubt. If you have/had a problem with what happened last year call me. You never did, or have ever said anything about it to my face.
One thing I will say in response to that cabal of mistruths and unkind words, is that the said 'up and comer of the right' and 'campus president', is now the Secretary of Young Labor Victoria. Long may his reign continue! 
Oh, and I dont know whether Mr Poulter particularly would have appreciated his name being invoked here. He was doing his honours, and admirably could not commit to the rigours of an MSA Office Bearing position, so declined.
But really, call me bruv...In the words of McCartney/Lennon "we can work it out"...
I don't like shadow games. Just say what you want to say to my face. You've got my number, gimme a call 0414 473 331.
Cheers,
MdB
Well said. Now please play nicely.
I cannot believe this has gone for 90 comments, get over it kids, enough slagging online like 16 year olds
michael de bruyn - if he is going to call you he won't be saying it to your face. And who calls anyone 'bruv'?
horus:
Why can't we be friends (4x)
I've seen you 'round for a long long time
I remembered you when you drank my wine
Chorus
I've seen you walking down in Chinatown
I called you but you could not look around
Chorus
I paid my money to the welfare line
I see you standing in it every time
Chorus
The color of your skin don't matter to me
As long as we can live in harmony
Chorus
I'd kind of like to be the President
So I can show you how your money's spent
Chorus
Sometimes I don't speak right
But yet I know what I'm talking about
Chorus
I know you're working for the CIA
They wouldn't have you in the Mafi-A.
Chorus
Chorus
Chorus
Chorus
fadeout
Come on guys, let's all make up. I love you all.
I'll be your friend, I'd love too.
Just meet me behind behind a public lavatory of your choosing for a spot of dogging.
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