i am delighted, DELIGHTED!, that you have address this very important issue of makeup expiry. i laugh at, nay MOCK OUTRIGHT, the experts who say throw your mascara away after three months. a pox on that, and oddly enough, never one on me.

i have unguents from places that have no food and drug regulation. i have the first chanel lipstick i bought at the galleries lafayette (montparnasse) during the reagan administration. i have creams which are downright against the law in 47.5 states made with the tender underbellies of unborn fetuses of nameless origin.

i have hairspray, oils, gels, mousses, moulding mud and freezing waxes from every decade since ready steady go was on the air.
i have yardley lip gloss, twiggy eyeliner and mary quant lipstick. when i die i am going to bequeath all these artifacts to somewhere.

and on a note to the germophobes cringing at my toilette: i have NEVER never had pink eye or impetigo or any of those things you are supposed to dread. the only thing i ever got, and it wasn't from makeup, was dysentary in mexico. (and boy did i look great after that skinny like the duchess of windsor i tell you.)

does this comment mean i should stop snorting the b/f's adderall? perhaps.
la depressionada | Homepage | 05.17.05 - 3:11 pm | #

It would have been really nice if you'd managed to go into the part about the depilatory for your mustache, as you did about 18 months ago. Every time I've thought of you since, I picture you with a five o'clock shadow.
Sterling | Homepage | 05.17.05 - 9:20 pm | #

Mmmm...underbellies of unborn fetuses...

On the topic, though: Hott!
Robotnik | Homepage | 05.18.05 - 1:59 pm | #

Eye-teeth.
Frankenstein | Homepage | 05.18.05 - 10:16 pm | #

If I understand the first paragraph correctly... you use earring posts to pick food out of your teeth? I'm not judging.
donatella | 05.21.05 - 4:39 pm | #

Maccers, I didn't even bother reading your post, but I can say this much. I'm tired of people confusing me with someone who gives a fuck. In fact, i'm thoroughly exhausted!
Trevor | 05.21.05 - 5:25 pm | #

Donatella

Yep that is correct. I oscillate between thinking that it is disgusting or that I am a genius.

I would rather use floss. I am wary of toothpicks since I have experienced them breaking between my teeth and exacerbating the situation.

I should carry those plastic prong thngs with me - I keep some always in the office - but I can never be arsed.

As Barry White once so sagely said, "Girl can't you see the trouble with me...."
maccers | Homepage | 05.21.05 - 6:01 pm | #