you take my breath away with a post like this. you articulate things that are going on in the back of my head, and maybe things that i'm afraid to think about. your kids will never doubt for a minute how much you absoluely love them. that's not a small thing. blessings
chris | 02.12.07 - 8:35 am | #

Breathless and teary - adjectives to describe my feelings right now. I know that one day I will probably feel the same exact way. I have the same type of dreams where I can not breathe because of the grief I feel that they are gone. I wake up in a panic and go look in their bedrooms. I kneel beside each one of them and pray safety and love upon them.
It's our mother's love working overtimes.
Hula Doula | Homepage | 02.12.07 - 9:35 am | #

Oh my...

I dread those days. I know they are coming because my first is readying to leave the nest next year. I think I won't sleep at all for those first few months.

Once they are birthed, do we ever really sleep soundly again?
Anne | Homepage | 02.12.07 - 9:43 am | #

I could have written this myself - if only I knew how to put my thoughts down on paper like you do.
I am sorry that you have dreams like that. But your babies are still here, just like mine are - and they love us.
kenju | Homepage | 02.12.07 - 11:27 pm | #

but maybe one day those same people who took the place of those spindly-legged children will bring you spindly-legged children of their own to use those sleds.

That was a beautiful, terrifying post.
Ms. Cornelius | Homepage | 02.13.07 - 2:14 pm | #

I can't stop crying so I must leave lurkdom to say how beautiful that was. I look at my babies and dread that day!
shannon | 02.14.07 - 4:33 pm | #

Bittersweet and tender...how I needed to read this now, when both of my young'uns are driving me up the wall. I am immediately returned to appreciating them, even as they spend their time-outs in their respective bedrooms.

I think I'll go give them some hugs now.
Mellie Helen | Homepage | 02.14.07 - 8:27 pm | #

Ditto. I have the same kind of dreams - I wake up sweating and gasping for air, like a bear is sitting on my chest. One is gone to college, so I go and sit on my boy's bed and rub his head while he sleeps. A few years and he will be gone, too. Then I may not sleep at all.

I love your blog - I found it through Fausta a while back.
Obi's Sister | Homepage | 02.15.07 - 8:29 am | #

Moved to tears. I'm speechless.
Jenny | Homepage | 02.19.07 - 8:15 am | #