No, Bobby and Whitney.
EWWW!!!!!
What the fluck?? Ok first off pee in a fake penis?? Then Put a Plastic Fake Penis in a mircowave?? Fluckin Idiot!!
That is too dang funny!! LOVE IT!!!
Wow... sounds like a fool-proof plan to me.
Is that for real?! Who is really that stupid!?!?
Nothing really needs to be said here!
LOL, why doesn't she just use the fake tube that all my friends on parole do?
You know...an ex friend of mine used to go to rest stop microwave to cook his Special K on long road trips.
God, people are fucking desperate!
I live in Pittsburgh so I just saw this on the local news. They wouldn't say "penis" so they just kept saying "organ." It was hilarious.
I am always amazed at what druggies do, to avoid detection!
Anyone find the name of the convenience store amusing considering the story?? The Git and GO?
yeah it's much more believable to give a urine sample that's 350 degrees
And they made a point to say that the microwave had been thrown away.
Too funny!
I pity the fool who innocently nuked his forzen burrito after that.
is this shit for real MK? I mean, really... who can make this shit up???
very bizarre but fascinating!!!
Could he possibly give a clean sample? I mean if you'd do that and expect it to work you must be frying on something.
Oh
my
God.
This shit is just too stupid for words.
I'd expect something from the "Cum-N-Go" but not the "Git-N-Go".
I don't get it. Why couldn't he just pee in a cup? Wouldn't that have been the simplier thing to do? Both of these people are idiots, because 1.) The people testing the urine will know it's from a male, not a female. and 2.) Don't you think warming up pee in the microwave might make it a little too hot? Wow, talk about stupid...
HEY! I have a KumNGo a few blocks away from me.. they're VERY popular in Iowa! lol
Parasite was somehow involved in all this. You know she was.
! Pig in a blanket!
Pennsylvania? God, that so sounds like something that would happen in Florida!
WTF???
what kills me is the man microwaved the penis in a convinience store...that is somthing i would have done in the privacy of my double wide...it's like smoking crack in the last pew of a church
What
the
Fuck?
I feel bad for the poor unsuspecting person who uses that microwave next!
but can he bake a cherry pie?
I WAS JUST SCREAMING MY HEAD OFF GOING "WWHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHYYYYYYYY?" ...BEFORE I READ THE SECOND HALF OF THE STORY EXPLAINING THAT THE SHIT WAS A DILDO. THANKS A LOT M.K FOR IMPLANTING HORRIFIC IMAGES IN MY HEAD FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE! STILL LOVE YA THOUGH!
You know this guy was the little kid who would put the thermometer on the light bulb and make it like 300 degrees when he wanted to stay home from school.
My first thought was another case like Bobbit's, then I thought a homemade sex-change. I need therapy...
Daya I just wanted yo to see something. Nothing urgent. I will try to be good.
Gross! I thought he'd cut his own dick off, you know, like the German cannibal and his little pal.
Yay my new avatar works!
How big was that fake penis??? I bet crack heads are size queens too.
Has Whitney completely lost her mind?
wth? stupid idiots...
Mouse you are always on good behavior! lol
When did you get rid of the cuke? I miss it!
You know, I'd actually expect that from the "Gulp 'N' Blow". Ha ha. Old Simpsons reference okayillstopnow.
But seriously, whoever said that they test the urine to see who it comes from is right, I mean, I can't believe they didn't even CONSIDER that. There's even an old joke where a druggie gets his girlfriend to do the urine sample and it turns out the doctor tell him 1) he's got an STD and 2) congratulations, he's pregnant!
hellokitty - Did you ever see the Bobbitt sex video? You needed a magnifying glass to see his shit!
Weener bucket: lol!
Jan: tell me this story - it sounds interesting!
what the fuck????
so weird people
Actually, I'm kind of relieved he didn't take a shit and put it in the microwave. At first, it sounded like this story was headed down that ugly path!
Poor Mouse Why so angry at this?
It took you away from you Hoagie
I know I know Lifes a Bitch!
THat shit is nutts! Just piss in a pill bottle.
Thanks Kellie! Here it is for you!
U know these people are both crackhead.. What?? he didn't have a microwave of his own to experiment in and apparently he didn't know he was cooking it instead of a quick warming.. What an ass??? I can't take it.. people are insane and I love it..lol
just for you Mizro 
German cannibal back for retrial
A self-confessed cannibal has returned to court in Germany, two years after a manslaughter conviction for killing and eating an apparently willing victim.
Last year, an appeal court ordered a retrial after state prosecutors argued Armin Meiwes,44, was guilty of murder.
The case shocked and fascinated Germans when it emerged that he had found a victim on a cannibal fetish website who volunteered for his fate.
Meiwes is trying to stop a film based on his story being shown in Germany.
State prosecutor Marcus Koehler told the three-judge panel on Thursday: "The defendant stands accused of murder for sexual gratification."
Frozen meat
Two years ago, Meiwes was found guilty of manslaughter after a court heard how his victim had volunteered to be killed and eaten in March 2001.
It heard a grisly confession of how he froze the body's meat and ate parts of it over several months.
Last year, a higher court accepted the prosecution argument that he was really guilty of murder because he killed for his own sexual gratification.
The BBC's Ray Furlong, in Berlin, says Meiwes' lawyers have said little before his retrial. But they have confirmed they are taking legal action to prevent a Hollywood film resembling his story from entering German cinemas.
Meiwes fears its release in Germany could prejudice his chances of a fair hearing.
Meanwhile, he is working with a German director on an authorised version of his story.
Story from BBC NEWS:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/go/pr/fr/-...ope/
4604494.stm
Published: 2006/01/12 10:05:30 GMT
© BBC MMVI
Thanks Mouse! Throw it in every once in awhile to make me happy!
I am trying to be on good behavior too but that comment about you above is making me want to be protective right now.
LA:
I actually thought the same thing and I was cringing as I decided to read on but alas, I was wrong.
HOLY SHIT!! gospel!!!
Some freaks are really fucked up in the head.
Kellie, my girl, it doesn't bother me a bit, but thanks for saying that. It's all good so no worries.
Wow, leave it to Pennsylvanians to do such a thing...
I'm embarrassed to be from PA now...
Yeah boiling urine. Makes MY day. Fuck, that's gross!
What was she going to do? Take 120 degree piss in there? They would think she was dying with a fever like that.
I HATE PENNSYLVANIA, I have lived here for 9 years 3 months and 24 days and each day I despise living here and stories like this of DUMBFUCKS who live in this state...MORONS!
gospel, i just had lunch...
i missed that pickle mouse! nice to see it.
gospel, so why do you make all of us read that?
oh god, i knew i shouldn't be reading this while eating lunch, i just knew it!
kitkatwoman i love your gravatar...but i am starting to feel a little sorry for star...you know she probably felt after she lost all that weight with "diet and exercise" and got an actual man (not her dog) to touch her in her special place for the first time that things were looking up...but she'll be allright. there are plenty of gay men still in need of faghags--maybe she could go down and place her resume with Unemployment and the Willam Morris Agency.
Thanks, death! I'll keep it around for a while. Um.....is that Imelda Marcos's green face over there?
if he's dumb enough to do that then his sample was probably tainted too.
Did he not have a microwave at home?
Gospel: I read about another little cannibal fucker....he's Japanese and wealthy as fuck...he got out of prison after a year (He killed and ate a 20 year old girl), and even has a cannibalism organization or some shit where they have meetings and talk about eating girl's buttcheeks.....WTF?? the world is gross.
WTF? Courtney coudn't be that stupid!
oh my god! just like tom sizemore's wizzinator!!! lmao!!
WTFFFFF? So was this a dildo?
Why us a fake penis? Wouldn't a container just work? So many questions, and so few answers, someone tell me now!
"little cannibal fucker", hahaha!
why does that sound like the twilight zone's version of chem club.
Daya: That is disgusting. What is wrong with people! This article is just... well.... I only shake my head and think "WTF??????????????"
Mouse: It doesn't bother me when it's about me but when it's about others the mommy side of me comes out!
Bonnie - I know! Whew!
Dayanara: can you post a part of the article? I love that filet mignon to them is a woman's ass.
I know shell!!
gospel:
ok, let me find it.
Duh, he should have nuked it at home.
wow. i am pretty embarassed to live in PA now. especially so close to mckeesport. ew.
ps: the gas station is called GetGo. it's accompanied by a Giant Eagle grocery store. i have $2.70 off per gallon of gas there. i rule.
yes mouse, that is indeed little green imelda. she's green with envy re: all the shoes that she doesn't have. and also she is green due to the fact that she just read about little dildos in the microwave warming up their piss and little cannibal fuckers in germany...
what?
http://www.crimelibrary.com/seri...d/sagawa/
5.html
Here.
what a sick story....
I am not embarrassed to be from PA because of this. Every state has dumbasses...they may not all get on TV, but trust me, they are there!
NEPA representin'!
sigh. my dad is from mckeesport. i can't wait to tell him this story...
omg, this sagawa dude needs to be locked in a padded room a.s.a.p!!
gross!
Quote:
Anyone find the name of the convenience store amusing considering the story?? The Git and GO?
IowaGirl (formerly I Heart Mic | Homepage | 02.24.06 - 1:22 pm | #
--------------------------------------------------
------------------------------
actually, it's called "GetGo." it's affiliated with a local grocery store chain called Giant Eagle (or, teh big bird, as we pittsburghers call it). sorry to burst everyone's bubble 
how did you come across that article daya? that is waaay too bizarre!
I love crimelibrary.com! I read that shit all of the time, Daya! You rock!
Death - ew. To all of it except the shoes. Mouse loves shoes!
jenna jerkwagon - you do rule! 
Death and mouse: I looove crime library...I'm reading about another little fucker named Nico Claux right now, freak thinks eating human flesh takes him closer to God.....OMG!!
Daya, tak in a few re:crimelibrary. Scary shit
Death: I was searching Ted Bundy once for a sociology project like 2 years ago and I found crimelibrary.com, it's gross and scary, but fascinating, just like horror flicks.
Thanks Dayanara! Much appreciated.
I do believe the Sagawa was and is sane. He was very fortunate that his father is wealthy or he would have been writing his tellalls from a cell or a nicely padded room. This is what scares me most about people. We all look so ordinary and "normal" so you never know who the crazies are until they sit down to a dinner fois gras, poached pears, and ass of white girl.
wtf is this world coming to? first: that woman was probably soooo cracked out to think that warming up piss in the microwave inside a fake penis is the most brilliant of all ideas, and second: cannibalism makes one closer to god... i have no words... but thanks for the link cause i will read up that shit right after dlisted!
Daya, Nico was a sick fuck. I have read every story on that site.
Topic - I agree. Why not just use a container of some sort?
Yeah Miz it is what Gospel pasted. They were gonna eat the dude's dick together, but the guy felt woozy and then died.
All the canibalism talk is making want a nice juicy burger.
gospel: I know....this guy Sawaga is very smart too, knew a different languages and was a art and culture savvy....scary shit.
Oh Bonnie Blue! I am so going to yack now!! How the hell am I supposed to enjoy free Happy Hour food when I am thinking about eating penises...bleh!
That guy (I believe) found his victim on the internet?
Such is the wacky, wonderful world of crackheads.
There are a guy here in Texas that saved his own poo and dried it in the microwave and would sprinkle it on the baked goods in a grocery store. He felt an employee of the store had disrespected him. He did it a few times over a 6 month period. It was on the news. You can never tell what you might get in a store. So watch your baked goods and where you microwave your burrito. I guess that would be the moral...
TAK!
hellokitty - that reminds me of an episode of MadTV where a guy did all sorts of disgusting things at a buffet. lol
HelloKitty that is why I like to cook at home... although I suppose they could spit in the ingredients at the factory. Crap, I'm only gonna eat the veggies from my backyard now.
Mouse, I can't think about these things too much or I'll be a weirdo that won't eat out. People are sick. I just wonder how many loogies I've ate in restaurants.
gospel: Thank you.
But now I have questions: how did he kill his 6 month meat-source?
Was it a man or a woman? How old?
Diseased? Dying?
Obviously suicidal.
My, I won't sleep tonight!
Well, I just threw my lunch away. Sad.
I apologize. I read Jan's comment and it was a man.
Very disturbing; it makes me very aware to what degree people are disturbed.
what I want to know is, what was her plan going to be for the actual urine test? was she just going to whip it out? and didn't that Sizemore (heh heh) guy get busted with his fake wang whilst at a drug test?
Didn't Tom Sizemore get caught using one of them in a drug test. If you are going for a work drug test you can bring it in a cup or whatever but if you are on probation or whatever they actually watch you go so a man has to pull it out in front of someone. Can you imagine the crackhead who sat around and said it would be great if I could make a fake penis and take someone else's pee and put it in it. And he's probably getting rich now from these crackheads.
Carrie:
I was kidding. Sorry, I couldn't help it with that comment.
Bonnie: I love, love, really love your avatar, sweets!
hellokitty - oh boy. Now I will wonder too. We're esting out tomorrow night, too. Fuck.
HelloKitty: OMG that is so disguisting... do you have a link? Reading all this is seriously going to make me aneorexic.
Miz:
THanks. I needed something different.
Try this:
http://www.alittlemoretotheright...com/blog/?
p=458
Carrie...
NEPA? Where are you from? I'm from Williamsport.
YAY KELLY!
That is disgusting. I don't even want to think about what's in the food in restaurants. At a buffet one time, a mother was holding her baby and the baby sneezed all over the entire buffet table. I took it upon myself to tell everyone in line what happened, and for some reason, I was glared at by restaurant staff, AND the mother with the baby was spitting mad at me. We left absolutely disgusted with the place and never went back.
Ew, Shell. Did they even change out the food?
i live like 2 miles from this place
get go rules! you totally save money on gas when you go there it's the best... so what if someone warms up a fake dick.
papa joe's coke binge - but it had REAL pee in it!?
It was such a cunning plan!
Ok, maybe not…but it does make a f*cking funny story.
Junkies have the most brilliant ideas. Of course, they always have holes in them the size of the Grand Canyon but the originality is worth praises!
Cooked penis! Bwahahahahahaha!!!
I don't get it either! Why a penis? Why not just a Mason jar, or a Ziploc bag or something more transportable?
sorry mouse. i overlooked that part...
papa joe's coke binge - I wish I'D overlooked it! God! Hey, are you the former finger bang joe?
i have $2.70 off per gallon of gas there. i rule.
jenna jerkwagon | Homepage | 02.24.06 - 2:10 pm
Sweet Mary! How much is gas there? Here in Texas it's $2.09.
Mouse...I think Finger Bang Joe is now Randy's Doctor.
Laughing cuz I can barely keep track of the avatars!!
This makes no goddamn sense.
My one (girl) friend needed to take a drug test and had a guy piss in a condom. She then "hid" the condom in a very convenient place...and there you go-it was kept at body temperature.
It would be pretty sick if the condom broke or what not.
gas is only like $2.13 or something... but when you buy stuff at giant eagle/getgo you get money off per gallon of gas.
i've just been racking mine up for awhile reserving it for when i can't afford to spend $641365365 on gas.
Too bad, I wish it was the real severed penis. I hate happy ending story.
I love all the avatars. I just might get me one. Something really nice, like a rainbow or a beach shot. That would be really calming, because I just find I'm so angry all time. Lashing out at everyone, hating everyone, even my mother. I think I really need help.
And my second question is was the lady Courtney Love?
And that is reason I love this blog.
Genius. Pure genius.
Uh, that just sounds stupid.
& your 2nd question MK, just killed me.
what dumb ass came up with that suggestion????? only something a crack head would do. Why not just put a sandwich bag filled with someone else's piss under ur armpit to keep it warm? That's what my boyfriend does.
I just saw this now, I jsut about had a heart attack because I didnt know it would make so much news!!
Yep Yep.. a great time to be in Pittsburgh! First its like "PITTSBURGH won the SUPERBOWL" And now we are known for dildos in microwaves
dang, y'all don't keep up with the cutting edge in corporate anti-drug policy, do ya?
Some companies have taken to having "monitors" watch you pee in the damned cup, because so many people have been bringing clean pee in a jar to the testing and switching it so they will pass.
There's a company who makes hollow strap-ons that you can pre-fill (and heat in the microwave) so that you fake out the corporate stormtroopers.
Obviously, this clown was trying to keep his job and private lives seperate, and purchased one of these gizmos. His mistake was using a public place to preheat.
whoop-but wouldn't the person monitering get suspicious when his girl friend whipped out a penis to pee into the cup?
I can't believe I live in Pittsburgh.
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