No fucking way! He looks "special".
With a 2x4 with nails in the end, maybe.
I'm never ever gonna be first. Definite no.
No way!!!!!
mk, friends don't let friends hit david schwimmer! it ain't right!
agh hes greasy! What happened!?
No, not even if he took off his hairpiece.
David Schwimmer is the man!
He looks like shit, but I used to have a crush on him in the early Friends years. *hides*
NERD ALERT!
I actually ended up hanging out with him and Matt Damon at a bar in Chicago...He's nice when he talks but have you ever been talking to someone that you just get this skin crawling feeling they have somthing to hide that's REALLY dark but they havn't really done anything to make you feel that way...
Yeah like that.But shit he did pay the tab.
I'm never ever gonna be first. Definite no.
Kim | 05.06.06 - 11:59 am | #
don't worry, it took a long time for me, too, but it'll happen, I swear *puts arm around Kim's shoulder*
Schwimmer's got The Crazy Eyes here, or the Crack Eyes, SOMEthing's not right....
FirstClass aka Candy Coxx | 05.06.06 - 12:12 pm | #
Well, if he paid the tab, that's all that really matters.
Exactly!!! Blue.
No and not even with a 2 x 4. I couldn't live with myself for hitting (in ANY way) a "special" person.
he hit on me once at bar. and to answer your question: absolutely not!
He defines "horseface."
No!
GO YANKEES 
uh, no way, no how. Period.
PrettyKitty Did you get that feeling i was talking about too?
I swear I could feel it from a mile away. Man probably has an S&M dungoen in his fucking basement.
Not with that jacket!
With a bat sure.
Ted Baxter called, he wants his jacket back.
MJF | 05.06.06 - 12:37 pm | #
Or Herb Tarleck.
michael are u gay?
WKRP!!!! I miss that shit! I would have done Johnny Fever in a drunken haze!
I think my grandfather used to own a similar jacket. So... definitely not.
What the fuck is with that outfit? He looks like a bird shit him out.
Ted Baxter called, he wants his jacket back.
MJF | 05.06.06 - 12:37 pm | #
TED BAXTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!! oh man
and Herb Tarleck - totally one of my heroes
Nope, not for me...
Hell yeah, I'd hit that...I'd hit Matthew Perry first, though....then Jennifer Aniston, then Courteney Cox, THEN him.
HELL NOW I WOULD NOT HIT THAT! I thought he was kinda cute on the show, but this shit is ridiculous. And that jacket only makes it worse...
I would hit this prick with a 2 x 4, my car, an axe -- basically anything deadly enought to inflict serious injuries and/or potential death. Anon 12:26 -- he is totally horse-faced. I truly hate this prick, partially because he was on that shitty show "Friends." I've heard he's a real tool in real life, too, and I've heard rumors he plays for his own team.
OH Man, imagine if David and Pony Parker hooked up and had kids.
Can you say Trigger!!???
His wallet=yes
Him=no
why do you gotta be such a fag
Hey Jennifer how was the birthday?
Did you parteee??
Cinco de Mayo was fun but my head is owwee today.
Rachel, Rachel, Rachel, will that work MK!! =0)
FirstClass: YES! he kept rubbing my back and i didn't even know the dude. i was super duper creeped out. S&M dungeon was running through my brain...but, he did pick up the tab! even when we told him not to.
Pretty Kitty, sweets, do tell about Schwimmer hitting on you. Are you in Chicago, because there's tons of sitings of Schwimmer here in the Windy City.
First Class/Candy Coxx -- I get the same feeling about a horrendous dark side to this tool. It's probably like that basement scene in "Pulp Fiction" where the gimp is chained in leather and kept in a box. I'm glad he paid your bar tab, though -- with all hiis money he should do that.
No frickin' way. He's fug. He was almost attractive as Ross in Friends, but now he just seems like a washed up asshole.
It would seem all the Friends are falling apart.
he gets like 75 million dollars a year he could fuck me with a spoon
Someone needs to tie a bag of Avon crap around his neck and turn Lewis loose on him. I betcha he'd scream like a girl...and run like one too.
Well I've always had a thing for used car salesmen so I'd totally hit it.
I think he has one to many chromosomes
Shouldn't he be standing on the sidelines, coaching a green bay game or something??
No fucking way! He looks "special".
Shondi | 05.06.06 - 11:55 am
normaly he looks "special" but here he just looks super-mega-extra-special.
& That Suite is just straight up gross.
Doesn't anyone ever think a man to be attractive just because he doesn't fit the traditional "mannequin" look?
I don't thnk Brad Pitt or the "others" are anything special at all!
Sometimes being a bit quirky can be really exciting!
I think..if he ate my pussy...and put his nose..just right...he'd hit my gSpot..yup..I'd hit it..
Gad the guy is a eyesore in person. The whiney-cartoon-giraffe was the high spot of his solo career.. let's hope there is a Madagascar part two...
Someone needs to tie a bag of Avon crap around his neck and turn Lewis loose on him. I betcha he'd scream like a girl...and run like one too.
MJF | 05.06.06 - 2:00 pm | #
ABSO-FUCKIN-LUTELY!!!
i suspect that HE was the "friend" who wouldn't do the reunion. does anyone know for sure which one? he's my guess b/c he seems to want to take himself so seriously.
JA--would go on-camera for a dexatrim
CCA---nothin' better going on, needs money for husbands' wardrobe.
JOEY--i'm sure he was contracturally(sp) obligated (his show was still running when the deal was started).
ML---spent his $$$ on drugs, rehab, and drugs. continues to need drugs.
PHOEBE--everything has failed thusfar. ( tho she's prolly the best actor in the group.)
sorry--i was ne'er a friends fan--and their names are escaping me right now.
i'll be in chi next thurs to see conan!!! i'll bring a two-by-four with nails, or some skin-so-soft just in case i run into polyester-daddy schwimmer.
he looks sensitive, tho. like i bet he uses "furry" cuffs n' shit while he tortures you w/ tweezers and electrical current.
Oh fuck, it's my senior prom all over again...
Yeah, I'd hit it. Behind the bleachers.
yeah i would. he can tea bag me anytime.
Uh, can I get a hell no.
if he paid me a loooooooooot of $$$
I'd hit it, but he'd have to pay me.
MOIST: it was here in LA, years ago. i didn't know who he was because i didn't watch the show. he was really nice, but nice guys are usually the ones that tie you up and hook your nipples to a car battery.
i know these things.
No way. He looks like he was a difficult birth.
No way
...but nice guys are usually the ones that tie you up and hook your nipples to a car battery.
i know these things.
prettykitty | Homepage | 05.06.06 - 4:21 pm | #
For some reason, that made me laugh like a lunatic. Thanks, I needed that. You have my condolences on the Schwimmer attack.
Are you joking?!!!?!?!?! No way in hell!
grapplehooks, i heart little britain. every time i see your avatar i crack up.
he has fake orange tan all in the sides of his greasy mouth. it dripped there from his fuckin greasy forehead. pasty asshole.
Eww. He looks like a shiny couch.
Dislikes the Schwimm.
that's disgusting.
*embarrassed*
I've always found him to be adorable!!
I'd never hit it, and not because of his looks--he's conceited as shit and thinks of himself as a real AC-TOR. Just another Friend who count his residual money. Why do these people still think they deserve a career?
See, this is why I try to tell my parents that in spite of their wishes, I'm probably not going to end up with a Jewish guy.
*sigh*
I'd hit Drew Carey, first.
Hey, at least HE makes me laugh!
No.Freakin.Way.
ewww. he looks like a real life sim.
I'd hit it.... Hard!!
I always liked him on Friends. Even thought he was kinda cute in a nerdy Jewish boy way....but boy, not only does he look speshul in the pic, I think he may have raided his Uncle Saul's closet for that look he's sportin'. eeeeeeeee!!!
Hell yeah! The pic makes him look like a dork, but DS is a sexy sumbitch!
Pretty Kitty -- that cracked me up about the nipples and the battery. Yeah, he's probably a freak. It's so hard dating -- there are so many freaks who would probably do stuff like that. If not the nipples and the battery, then rubber diapers and other weird shit. That's why I stick to Italian boys -- they're pretty much straight up about what they want, but I'm attracted to them, too. Schwimmer looks like every young law clerk I've ever met, and I've seen plenty.
Fuck NO, Well if i did, it would only be because he is rich. He looks like he road the short bus to school.
i'm gonna go with a "no" on hitting this...
I like guys with big noses for some reason. I'd jump him. He has a nice bod.
Hell yes on the Italian boys. I started dating my first one more than a year ago and two weeks ago he asked me to marry him.He's such a hottie!!! hehe
Hell to the no. He has been around JAniston too damn long. He looks like a fag.
Okay I'm not trying to be mean here but he looks like a special ed escapee.
Crazy Mommy Lady -- congrats, hon! Them Italian boys are hotties, and I esp. love my blue-eyed ones! They can be temperamental(sp?) and moody, but literally worth the "ride." That's one of the reasons Meloni is my avatar -- one yummy Italian boy.
evening, bitches!
i meant, evening bitches!
Uhm..who picked out this dude's clothes? I thought celebs were supposed to have 'stylists'. This guy needs to hire one, or fire the one that picked this shit out.
I wouldn't hit him. Not cute and his clothes look bad. 
Bitch has morphed into a muppet!
Hell to the no. He has been around JAniston too damn long. He looks like a fag.
beautybabymama | 05.06.06 - 8:03 pm | #
Probably is. He is gross, worse than could even imagine.
That's hot.
Shell.. Please don't tell me you would HIT him?
He may be nerdy and horsefaced but he's smart and funny as all hell get out.
Hell, yeah, i'd hit it
he has fake orange tan all in the sides of his greasy mouth. it dripped there from his fuckin greasy forehead. pasty asshole.
maria carey | 05.06.06 - 5:10 pm | #
there was actually a Friends episode where his character Ross went to the tanning salon and turned 5 shades darker - only on the front side.
He was dating a black chick at the time and her family thought he was mocking them
Erm, no.
I would it it 10 years ago. Not now! Ewwwwwwww...
Hell Yeh Id hit it!!!!!! mmmmmmmmm
So many many things are wrong with that picture. He looks like he should be selling encyclopedias door to door.
Maybe Matthew Perry drugged him up and then dressed him up really funny as a joke...That must be it.
if he was gonna do my math homework
100th!
yeah, i'd hit it...if i was a NECROPHILIAC!
sweaty puffy coke whore redux.
My goodness, he's, um, er, I suppose --
do I have to? Oh jeez....
Guess I am the outsider here, but I would hit it and I like his outfit.
This pic though he looks hit and hard. He'd have to get some rest.
Also, I'd have to be "on a break".
Who would hit that. He has always been a jerk, friends was not a good show. JA ruined this guys chance for anything.
p.s. he looks gay.
separated at birth with a basset hound - which makes it a no since I'm not into beastiality
Hell to the NO!
The only way I would hit that is if I was driving a Hummer at 75 mph and he was on foot, running for his pathetic little life.
Anno 10:20 -- hon, I have a basset hound and she's utterly beautiful -- don't be hating on the bassets!
LA, right on, babe -- a big ass hummer at 75 mph or a huge, speeding concrete truck -- that's the way to do it. Can I join you when you run down his pathetic ass?
He looks like Pee Wee's cousin! I used to want to schmeck his wank, but this look is a total turn-off. My pussy just dried up, Ross!
hell no
Sure I wouls hit it... with my 9-iron. I hate his nasal-whining voice!
not even a little bit
His nose looks thinner. Did he have work done?
Yeah... (looks down, shuffles feet) I'd still hit it. Got a weakness for jewish boys.
Mayyyybe if I hadn't ever seen the leather pants episode......
No I would not hit that shit!heinous!!! none of the 3 main dudes from Friends appealed to me!
with a brick, over and over and over again.
I would hit it twice just so I could tell my friends I fucked Ross, Twice..
p.s. rumor is he had HUUUUGE you know what.
That retard needs a helmet, and he will be complete
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