bullshit
No way she could have written that. Bitch is illiterate.
God I hate her and longwhoria.
It's too obvious. Then again, so is she. This was a strategic move on her part--if she even wrote it.
The Bitch is still a bitch. Talentless!!
Holy smokes, could that letter be more made-to-be-leaked?
I kinda hate her now, he deserves a medal for putting up with her annoying ass...
Normally I would have to say that National Enquirer is a bottem-feeding piece of shit tabloid and just made this up. But then again, this is Jessica Simpson we are talking about, so you know she sold the story to them to garner her sorry ass publicity 
She didn't right that shit.. she is a heartless, self-centered bitch!
I feel sorry for her. I feel relieved for Nick to be away from these people, and I think her father is a freak ass perv who needs to be stopped.
You know Nick had to actually love her to put up with that fucking carnival of a family.
Why doesnt that Longwhoria mind her own biznizz and go back to chewing wood with those rat teeth of hers.
Yeah, the "wife he wanted" was one who didn't blow half of Hollywood while still married. Last I checked, marriage vows didn't allow for sucking off Johnny Knocksville in a trailer.
Stupid bitch.
Oh, and I hate Eva L too.
Maybe Papa Joe is balling Longoria too. His dick in his daughters mouth and his fist in that midgets ass. No rest for the sicked.
*write
I am so glad that Nick is not with this fat, plastic surgery botched cooze. He seems like an ok, down to earth guy. Manillo looks like a ho, but at least she isn't a Barbie slut like Chestica. I want this beyotch and her stupid sister to disappear forever.
BTW, since when the fuck did Chestica and Longwhoria become BFFs? First it's music videos and then it's divorce parties, what's next? Muff-diving whilst Tony Parker watches and beats off?
Nic said take your cheezy bites pizza ass and GET OUT.
i'm going to hate myself for saying this, but i really think she is smarter than she appears. i think the whole ditzy thing was to make newlyweds fun to make fun of.
I don't like jessica and I never did.
Somehow it makes perfect sense that Chestica and Longwhoria are friends.
this smacks of her incest -money driven daddy. she has a new single...that's tanking...everyone thinks she's a whore who cheated on her husband.,....she needs to do all she can to get back in peoples good graces...is it wrong that I want her to get hit by a chicken of the sea truck?
and she looks like a $^^%&*^& man
they should never had put their marriage on TV..that really fucked things up...plus she is pretty annoying. dumb, whoriffic..IDK..still the whole thing is kinda sad?..like he was her first?? ha who knows..ne ways that is a sad letter
It's so telling that Longwhoria and Jessica "MushMouth" Simpson are BFFs. You are known by the company you keep after all. I am so sick of them both
Why is her dad giving out her (fake)correspondence to magazines?
Love her! Nick is a whining puss.
It takes a lot for a person to admit that they did wrong. But like the good boook says: YOU REAP WHAT YOU SOW.
What a stupid hooker! 
bitch please...and the pose in that pic is horrible. she looks like she is riding an invisible bull laying down.
And let's not forget Bam Margera and Dane Cook
Sorry we couldn't have tried harder.
Your sorry YOU couldn't have tried harder
who knows... sounds like something a 16 year old would write, which sounds appropriate
Totally staged. The bitch is losing it.
Glad Nick got away from that trash.
the correct punctuation gives her away - there is no way she knows how to use apostrophes
and Adam Levine. Remember the pics with her leaving the hotel in a man's shirt?
Totally staged. The bitch is losing it.
Glad Nick got away from that trash.
NikkiH | 07.14.06 - 2:07 pm | #
Your avie is super cool
Hmm, I like her a little less now that I know she hands with Eva L.
does anyone believe that she was a virgin on her wedding night?
she should have stopped at I'm sorry. cause she is a sorry ass bitch
and Adam Levine. Remember the pics with her leaving the hotel in a man's shirt?
Anonymous | 07.14.06 - 2:09 pm | #
That's right...I knew there was someone else, but I couldn't think of the name
florida girl | Homepage | 07.14.06 - 2:10 pm | #
You had me at I'm sorry - bwaaaaaah
and i'm sorry my daddy was there with a video camera on our wedding nite.
no wonder why everyone in her high school hated her.
Both Jessica and Longwhoria are overated that's why they are friends "birds of a feather......"
Jessica could not have written that letter I don't think she has the vocabulary capability required to do so (Dumbass)did she even graduate high school?
El Cholo still exists? Cool! I went there back in the prehistoric times. Well actually it was more like 1993.
Cow.
Your avie is super cool
Chryssy | 07.14.06 - 2:10 pm | #
Thanks! It's the current Doctor Who. 
Ahahahahaha go take a shower papa joe... what a mental image him digging through the trash!
florida girl, I wouldn't doubt it. UGH.
I don't believe any of this crap.
PHONY
The real letter:
"I am so sorry, Nick, so sorry that I got caught. Those men meant nothing, well except Johnny's tongue and Adam's stamina, but you still rate right up there. I couldn't be the wife that you wanted because my heart belongs to daddy. That is the real reason why."
Dolly Delawennie | 07.14.06 - 2:29 pm | #
Hilarious
Dolly - word.
She didn't want to fuck Nick anymore. Everytime he touched her she was repulsed. You can't have a marriage without sex and she just did not want his stanky sweaty body humping on her anymore.
Dolly, that's great! That family is messed up!
Ok, the letter does not contain any run on sentences. The diction is simplistic yet not derivative. Punctuation for the most part is correct (check out that couldn't, whoa! Usage of conjunctions to begin sentences minor faux paus. My not so educated hypothesis: Mommy wrote it.
Real letter: "Nick, im relly sorry about everthing. dont me mad, ok?
and by letter I mean: text message
mishma | 07.14.06 - 2:38 pm | #
LOL
"I am so sorry, Nick, so sorry that I got caught. Those men meant nothing, well except Johnny's tongue and Adam's stamina, but you still rate right up there. I couldn't be the wife that you wanted because my heart belongs to daddy. That is the real reason why."
Dolly Delawennie | 07.14.06 - 2:29 pm | #
--------------------------------------------------
---------------------------
Oh God, and these two whores are going to drag Tony Parker down with them. That guy better run for the hills, cause SA has another championship to win!
mishma, I love your grav. Is that your cat?
And ITA. Although I'd be surprised if she is smart enough to send a text.
Dolly Delawennie | 07.14.06 - 2:29 pm | #
her knees together... thats a stretch.
Ted Casablanca basically said that Johnny Knoxville tongue-punched her dirt-star... Lucky Jackass...
Who in their right mind would fuck Johnny Knoxville? During the deed he probably makes farting noises or picks his nose. The same goes for Bam Margera, too. Gross. Just gross.
This is so blatant. In one paragraph, the writer uses the receiver's name twice? I don't think so. If I'm writing a letter to Nick, I wouldn't keep repeating his name in the letter.
(love the Absolute Hunk, NoAnjl)
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.
good one. you know someone else wrote that shit to get her more publicity.
Winnyfranfran | 07.14.06 - 2:51 pm | #
So true!!! What catches!
Myself, thanks. Ain't he da shit? Enjoy.
The Simpsons make me sick to my stomach.
no one wants to fuck her cause before they do they have to audition for her daddy...
Didn't Nick say he wanted to go to counseling and she didn't? And what was he asking of her that she couldn't do? coook? clean? what??? he seems like such a sweet guy! and I love the fact he did things around the place (yeah yeah I'm guilty of watching some reruns! there was nothing else on I swear!!)he moved them in the damn house he did what MEN do! you don't want some pussy ass who has to call someone else to do the moving and such PLUS he put up with her *malibu stacy* IQ! "Hee hee don't ask me I'm just a girl"from the SIMPSONS(Lisa's doll)
Who in their right mind would fuck Johnny Knoxville? During the deed he probably makes farting noises or picks his nose. The same goes for Bam Margera, too. Gross. Just gross.
Winnyfranfran | 07.14.06 - 2:51 pm | #
Exactly. Johnny Jackass had that full port-o-potty dumped on him in the first episode of Jackass. He and Bam are beyond gross.
Ah, Jessica...you lost me at "I..."
Twat.
my question is what CAN this dumb bitch do, besides whine like a sick cat
I wish she' close her mouth and disappear. While she's at it, she can take her sister and her pimp, I mean father, with her.
I have to say, I have no respect for Nick whatsoever. After all, he did choose to marry that simpering idiot. As my mom likes to say, you get what you pay for.
Was it too much for Nick to ask his wife not to fuck Johnny Knoxville while on location
ok that was funny.........and WTF is up with Mrs. Johnny Knoxville???? Why does she put up with that dog
Who in their right mind would fuck Johnny Knoxville? During the deed he probably makes farting noises or picks his nose. The same goes for Bam Margera, too. Gross. Just gross.
Winnyfranfran | 07.14.06 - 2:51 pm | #
Not to mention Steve-O !!!!!!!!
Seriously, tallulah.
Well, anyway. I do feel kind of bad for her. But only a little.
if this was obtained the day after the divorce was finalized, why wasn't it printed sooner?
anyway i'm sick of BOTH of them.. just STFU, both of you. shit... "i'm sorry." "no, i'm sorry!" JUST STFU!!!!! obviously they really hate each other, or they'd still be together. nick wants to go to strip clubs and date chicks with big breasts, and jessica wants to screw jackasses and fags like adam levine. that's the bottom line.
adam levine is gay???
No, he isn't gay... AND he kick-dropped her ass soemthing fierce!
Bitch deserved it.
Gary Coleman @ 2:51, can you STFU about tongue punching dirtstars for chrissake?
please... sounds sooo suspect. sounds like they took note from suri's birth certificate leak.
SPEAKING OF, WHERE THE HELL IS SURI?
adam levine is gay???
no he's not gay, he's a fag
How many millions of people will fall for this caca and go "oh, poor Jess... No wonder she as pouting for photogs for 2 weeks."
Jessica Simpson knows how to write?
The Simpsons are very sick and mentally twisted people. Jessica cheating on Nick is probably the best thing that could have happend to him (um, why would you cheat on Nick with Bam Margera by the way - he's so disgusting!). He should be very glad to get away from that crazy family.
The best part of this divorce bulshit was that Levine didn't even want to be with her!
but dane cook wants to be with her, for some reason. i admit she's a nice girl, but she's ugly and has fake tits.
Is it my imagination or does she look like a muppet in this picture? Maybe her glasses are too big for her nose, but match her huge wide-open mouth.. who knows.
I hate both of those Texas bitches! The Jessica skank lived right down the street from where I used to work, InterVoice in North Dallas.
Why is she covering her stomach in all these Cabo photos? Where did the damn photographer come from anyway?
The Simpson family really is fucked up. I've never seen a family so star hungry and willing to give up every shred of decency in order to become rich and famous. I don't think Papa Simpson realized what little monsters he's created.
Know that a part of me will always love you, Nick. Always.
Oh, fuck off.
i simply flat out hate Jessica Simpson. Her, asslee and her father are the epitome of everything wrong with our society and culture. I think they must have a sad existence. I am not jealous. I would never want their "life." I just don't respect people without talent. Jessica and Asslee have millions of dollars for acting like dumb bitches. I think of all the hard work that was accomplished for women to get treated with equality in our society, women with intelligence grace and class. Now, there are these fucking cunts, along with parasite and blohan. Little girls all over america wish to be like these celebrities. Oh, our world is fucked up! I am not trying to be self-righteous....I just want women of true talent to be recognized...just one....please make these women go away. In the mood I am in I would seriously bitch slap all these DUMB ASS Hoes. It's 4:30 I am outta here!!!!!!!!!!
Aww. How sweet and thoughful. And the other part of her will be down her Daddy's pants.
She's some kind of wonderful.
Yeah, wasn't it a Blind Vice that she thought Adam Levine loved her, and that was the nail in the coffin for her marriage? Oh, and bitch got an abortion too.
That's a publicity cunt--oops!--I mean stunt all the way.
she did get an abortion huh?? I forgot about that little blind item!!
an abortion? i don't remember that?
FUCK HER AND HER WHOLE FAMILY!!!!DO US ALL A FAVOUR AND CHOP OFF YOUR OWN HEAD AND SOVE IT UP YOU FLAT ASS
OPPS SHOVE
Wow, Longwhoria IS really a bitch. I'd punch her if I were Nick.
Nick should take Tony Parker out for a "Never married Longwhoria and loving it" party.
If Jessica was so ugly she wouldn't have all of the hot male celebrities in hollywood banging on her door, like Jared, Brent Bolthouse,in an Aussie mag there are pics of him and her going to lunch, Dane,Zach,and yes Adam still calls her according to sources in the tabloid papers, the guy that's in her new video, she has many male friends, that's all.
Do USC students still have 50% off at El Cholo? Do I even have the restaurant right? Mexican places are a dime a dozen in LA. Just as are real Mexicans.
Nobody gives a shit. Go on back to daddy and keep your pie-hole shut..
That bitch needs to just go back to fucking her father; that is, if there's room in his bed next to her sister.
If Jessica was so ugly she wouldn't have all of the hot male celebrities in hollywood banging on her door,
just horny guys that would bang anything with big fake tits
nick shoulda known it was over when she asked him "didn't you ask me who my daddy was?" when they fukked. ha!
I always hated Jessica Simpleton! Always, never thought she could sing and always thought she looked like a tranny. Sadly Nick has all of the vocal talent but sings shitty music and will always be in her shadow.
This letter was masterminded by Papa Joe. Remember this the man who once said in an interview before people really even knew who she was he would stop at nothing to get his daughter famous then made those gross comments about her breasts.
By the way love how she's hiding that new Michael Jackson nose of her's under that hideous hat. Let's just hope on her next MTV music tour for the troops the terrorists do us a favor and kidnap her!
Update
a new simpson letter has been found, this time written by little sis ashlee. it is addressed to ex-boyfriend ryan cabrera and simply reads:
dearest ryan, i am so sorry about that sexualy transmitted disease i gave you. honestly dude, when i sang pieces of me, those were not the pieces i wanted to give you!
JFUNK: Right on!
see why you shouldn't marry a virgin? She just had to see what she was missing.
I never heard about her having an abortion. Could someone please elaborate on this? Did she supposedly abort Nick's child or someone else's? Nosy people want to know, even if it IS just a rumor.
By the way, can't stand the bitch. She had a great guy. I really they would still be married, too, if they had never done the reality show. She let stardom get to her and it has cost her a loving husband and any respect she ever had. What a greedy little bitch.
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