Holy Father,
Can we perhaps expect that you and Chico will soon be greeting us from an iMac or iBook? I seem to recall that Umberto Eco (an interesting writing though sorely in need of conversion) has asserted that the Mac is the fundamentally Catholic computer while Windows is based upon Protestant (and perhaps indeed relativist) principles: http://jmm.aaa.net.au/articles/9707.htm
DarwinCatholic,
Thank you for that interesting link. Unfortunately, my only experience is with PC’s, so I cannot measure the veracity of the author’s claim. However, as he has characterized the two operating systems, his argument makes sense. I suppose the reason that I have never bothered to try a Mac is because it seems to be the preference of certain Jesuit and tree-hugging habit-less nun types; and I just can't seem to get past that.
God bless you.
Papa
Papa Blogmeister,
As far as Jesuits and tree-hugging nuns using Macs go, I don't think so. They all work in chancery offices over here. And the chancery is big business, from the CEO on down. For them, it's Microsoft all the way.
God bless,
Chris
Dearest Papa,
Why oh why do you like cats? Please like some other animal instead.
How about a cute little puppy? You wouldn't have to change litter boxes becaue dogs are smart and go outside in one exclusive area that is usually inconspicuous. Except for my father-in-law's dog. Not only is she an ugly thing but she doesn't care where she goes. I think she has a "who gives a d***" attitude because she has low self-esteem since she is sooooooooooo homely and she knows it.
So if you take my advice ang get a puppy then just don't get a Britney Spaniel (yuck).
Love you,
Jane
kwootness.
see you this world youth day, papa 
Chris,
Thank you for pointing out the corporate nature of the chancery there. Are you sure that the computer system there is not a reflection of the logical and appropriate approach of the head geek? You might find that when Sister Joan comes home at night, she kicks off her Birkenstocks and powers up her Mac. I don’t know for sure; I’m just sayin’…
God bless you and thank you writing.
Papa
Jane,
Thank you for writing. I love all of God’s creatures. I just have a special place in my heart for cats, even though most people would agree that dogs are far superior pets.
As far as your father-in-laws dog, perhaps you should try teaching it to use a litter box like Chico.
God bless you.
Papa
xvi,
I am pleased to hear you are attending WYD, I'll keep an eye out for you. Be sure to say 'hi' if you see me; I'll be up towards the front and wearing a miter.
kwootness too. [?]
God bless you.
Papa
Your Holiness,
I use Linux. I would definitely recommend it. If not linux, then I would have to go for a Mac system. I heard that there browser, Safari uses the Konqueror (linux) web browsers khtml rendering engine. Of course, linux can be put on any system and it's free.
cue,
Thank you for the suggestions. I like 'free', but I am not fond of the idea of having to learn and write code; I just want to turn on my computer and muse away.
God bless you.
Papa
Aw, what a sweet Katze is Chico! And as for Firefox, I can tell you that you will simply love the features, especially the 'tabby' browsing feature.
TTFN!
xoxo
I, a seminarian who likes to wear his cassock and surplice, proudly use a Mac. I fix Windows PCs, but I use a Mac for everything I do computer-related.
And, according to the comic strip Non Sequitur, even God uses a Mac (albiet one with a $3000 30" Apple Cinema Display!).
If you think Firefox is neat, go to an Apple Store (or reseller) and play around with a Mac with Dashboard, Exposé, Safari, Spotlight and other nifty things that Microsoft wishes they could have.
Pontif,
Can we call you "Ponti" for short?
But anyway, looking at the jaunty image of you and Chico it occurs to me that what the Church really needs is a pontifical cat calendar. Nothing silly mind you. (I don't think little cat vestments in the colors of the liturgical seasons would be a good idea.) Just some good pictures of a pope and his cat for the faithful to hang up in their cubicles.
Jeff,
Thank you for your advice. From your numerous websites, I gather that you are from St. Louis. Have I mentioned that I know someone from St. Louis? Not to come off as a namedropper, but his name is Archbishop Raymond Burke. Enjoy him while you can, I’m getting a lot of pressure to move him to Detroit and give him a red hat, but you didn’t hear it from me, so let’s just keep it between us.
Thanks again and God bless.
Papa
DarwinCatholic,
It’s nice to hear from you again. Your calendar suggestion is a wonderful idea! Chico would love doing something like that; he’s such a ham! Of course, the photos would need to be taken with a real camera rather than one of those webcam thingies. The webcam picture quality is so poor that it looks like someone touched it up by using the add noise feature from Paint Shop Pro.
I agree that dressing the little kitty up in clerical garb would be too much, after all it seems like the episcopate has enough kitties already. Perhaps you can detail your suggestion and send it in to the Prefect for the Congregation of Public Relations Gimmicks. I’m sure he would love your idea too.
God bless you.
Papa
That's one of the best pictures of B16 I've seen so far. He looks warm and friendly, and he's got a "PuddyTatt" on his shoulder. Too cute.
Your Holiness, if a separated brethren might dare to submit for your consideration an even greater adherance to Rerum Novarum, I would suggest advising Fr. Norbert to convert all of Vatican City's computers to the operating system that most conforms to the Distributist principles of G. K. Chesterton and Hillaire Belloc: Linux. You will have greater stability and security, and far more control over the appearance of your screen.
Most of the encyclicals and other church documents are already effectively opensourced. So firefox and linux would fit in nicely.
BTW - when are you going to write one? Maybe just to say your books already cover everything.
And when are you going to do your first piano collection - You seem to be able to handle the Piano keys and the Kingdom keys with grace.
Lucy,
Thank you. Chico is such a joy!
God bless you.
Papa
EvCathAugsConf,
Separated Brethren are welcome to participate, especially those who are familiar with the likes of Chesterton and Belloc, because if they keep at it they won’t be separated for very long.
Thank you for your suggestion; I will forward it to Fr. Norbert and the other holy-geeks.
God bless you.
Papa
Tz,
Thank you for your technical input and the complement. Regarding my encyclical, it is still in the works. I stated earlier that part of the reason it isn’t finished yet is this blog. That being said, I might muse about my encyclical within the next few days. I wouldn’t necessarily expect to see a piano collection from me; after all, I’ve got a blog now.
God bless you.
Papa
Pontiff,
I am deeply grateful for your advice about Firefox. I had never heard of this program before I read your post about this several hours ago, but now have used Firefox all this time, with not a single satanic pop-up.
But I have a question that you may not be able to answer, but surely Fr. Norbert can answer. Or perhaps, some of your disciples in the Downriver area in Michigan might be able to answer. The question is this: How does ne get a Firefox icon on the desktop or on the menu thingy in the bottom right corner of the computer.
Thanks again for your wise pontificating.
Jay,
Thank you for writing. I’m glad you are enjoying the Firefox experience. When Fr. Norbert installed mine, the setup program offered the option of adding icons. I picked up the holy-geek hotline and asked Fr. Norbert what you should do. He said you could easily add an icon to your desktop by right-clicking your desktop and selecting New > Shortcut. Then you click the browse button and navigate to your Firefox.exe file (presumably it is in c:program filesMozilla Firefox, unless you selected a different location when installing it). After selecting the firefox.exe file, click Next. A name field will appear and it will most likely contain the name “firefox.exe”, you can leave it as it or change it to anything you like. Click Finish and you are done creating a desktop icon.
Father Norbert was unsure of which menu thingy you were referring to. He said: There is a quick launch menu thingy down by the start button (left side)[just drag your desktop icon over to it and it will add it automatically], and then to the far right is where you find the icon tray (has the clock, etc.) [you don’t use that for shortcuts] . Sometimes, based on your configuration you might have a menu thingy next to the icon tray. That menu thingy merely gives you quick access to your desktop icons [so if you make a desktop icon, it will automatically be in there too].
Be sure to check out the numerous extensions that are available. Some, like Adblock, are must-haves and many others are simply quite useful.
God bless you.
Papa
Pontiff,
You advice worked perectly!
I know you are a very busy man, and I am grateful that you have spent all this to work this out for me. I presume there ae many others who are able to follow these instructions also.
In exchange for your kindness on this matter, I would be happy to offer you some advice, should you want it, particularly on the matter of a new bishop for the archdiocese of Detroit. As you may know the current cardinal has already had his 75th birthday, and seems to want to hang out some more. I think you should give him a much deserved respite from his toils in a tropical place, perhaps on the other side of the globe from Michigan.
God bless you.
Jay,
I'm glad it worked out well for you, but Fr. Norbert deserves the credit. It really is amazing the amount of patience the holy-geeks will have us neophytes if we simply offer them a Code Red in exchange for their help.
Regarding the bishop situation in Detroit, I am not so sure I can help you just yet. For one, I don't think I can move the cardinal to the other side of the globe, because if memory serves, that would put him in the Indian Ocean. I don't know if he can swim, and even if he could I doubt he would know the language of the locals. Second, I have discussed the situation in Detroit with a number of other theologians. Given the history of the archbishopric in Detroit, the general consensus is quite simply: God doesn't like Detroit. That's not to say that God doesn't love you folks as individuals, there's just something about that region that turns Him off. We don't know if it's the politics of the area or the gymnasium churches, the chatting before, during and after Mass, or your so called 'Mass for Shutins.' We suspect that the only thing that has held back His swift hand of Justice is the prayers of the Blessed Virgin and the faithfulness of your Polish community.
Of course this is all just the speculation of a few theologians sitting around and having a beer together while chitchatting so it is not to be considered anything more than that. Rest assured that I will do my best for you though.
God bless you.
Papa
Top 10 reasons God hates Detroit:
1. They don’t have any mountains or trees (but, they would, most likely, be set on fire anyway (see #4.)).
2. It smells bad
3. Most of the buildings are ugly due to vandalism, abandonment, arson (see #4), and/or really bad taste
4. “Devil’s Night”, this is an event that happens the night before Halloween. The locals see how many places they can set on fire that night. I’m told that one year they set 500 abandoned buildings on fire. Which begs the question: How can a city have that many abandoned buildings? So many that there are plenty left for "Devils Night" the next year. And also, how did they set fire to that many buildings in one night? Half the city has to be in on it.
5. Most of the people who live and work there are very rude and unfriendly. (And probably dangerous.)
6. Kwame Kilpatrick and his chief of police.
7. If you go to an event in the city, there’s a good chance of getting shot or seeing someone get shot.
8. Their football and baseball teams suck (sorry for the language, Papa)
9. They have one mountain, its called Mt. Trashmore. Care to guess why?
10. The only beautiful buildings in Detroit are the very old Catholic churches and sadly there aren't that many Catholics in Detroit.
Dearest Pontiff,
Please reconsider sending the cardinal to the other side of the globe, even if it is in the middle of the Indian Ocean. Perhaps those who named him a "pillar of the church" several years ago -- right after the Detroit Free Press reported the cardinal had secretly transferred a known serial pedophile to be pastor of a parish in Alpena with an elementary school -- would buy him a big boat he could live on, with a deck from which he can shoot golf balls into the sea.
Or perhaps some of the $900,000 that was raised for Sacred Heart Seminary a t a gala banquet few months ago could be used to pay for his boat. Since the cardinal has not a single priest scheduled to be ordained in the year 2006, it's hard to imagine what the money would be used for at the seminary.
It also does not matter if he understands "the language of the locals" in India. He doesn't understand the language of local Catholics in Detroit either. His chancery has treated orthodox Catholics as foreigners all this time, so it would not make much difference.
You are quite right now that I think about it, God doesn't like Detroit, to judge by the leadership we've had for four decades.
Hi, Papa Ratzi! Just stumbled on your blog today, and saw you were looking for cat photos. Dude..um..er...sir, you should look at these two that I found. I enhanced them for you so they're nice and pretty. Hope you enjoy!
http://www.catacombers.com/index...e&album=6&
pos=6
and
http://www.catacombers.com/index...e&album=6&
pos=0
By the way, you should hang out sometimes on catacombers.com. As a musician and writer it's right up your alley.
--Ann (catacombers.com head toddler mom and soprano)
Jane,
Thank you for your observations; I will accept them as being an unbiased characterization. Nevertheless, I think my fellow theologians were putting a tad bit more emphasis on things like the leadership of the Church, rather than the terrain of the area. Thank you for the analysis of the City of Detroit, though. Perhaps the reason that the See of Detroit seems forsaken is that it is difficult to find a bishop to go there.
God bless you.
Papa
Jay,
It’s nice to hear from you again. I feel your pain - I really do, but I still can’t have him on a boat hitting golf balls out into the sea. Do you realize how irresponsible that would be? Didn’t you see the episode of Seinfeld when Kramer was hitting golf balls into the sea? Whales should be harvested by fishing boats, not washed up on shore with plugged spouts. That would NOT be good stewardship. Please be patient and pray, then we’ll see what the good Lord wills for the folks in Detroit.
God bless you.
Papa
Ann,
Beautiful! I love it and have bookmarked it. Thank you.
God bless you.
Papa
Jane,
About #2 It smells bad.
Having been both in downtown Detroit and downtown New Orleans, which is historically a much more Catholic city, I can vouch for the fact that New Orleans smells worse. Especially during Mardi Gras. Especially near Bourbon Street. Especially during Mardi Gras. And a few weeks before the actual Tuesday.
I'm guessing that it would be worse during Mardi Gras. I was there in October.
So God doesn't like New Orleans either?
And Papa? Could you arrange the next Cardinal to decree that all the Masses have to be said in vernacular, all over the world, except English? That way when we heard a heretical homily, we wouldn't care?
I do that fairly often by going to Polish, Slovak and Eastern Rite parishes now. It helps.
Chris,
My colleagues and I have not considered the status of New Orleans in the eyes of God. Certainly He cannot be very fond of Mardi Gras. I can’t really speak to the stench in either city, but back in the 1970’s I had heard stories in Germany about how breathtaking (literally) the stench over the Rouge River bridge in Detroit was.
I’m sorry; to order the Mass to be said in the vernacular with the exception of English wouldn’t be very prudent or desirable. You should be getting sound homilies regardless of the language in use. That is the problem that we need to address, and FWIW, I think we are already seeing a little improvement in that regard (in the USA).
God bless you.
Papa
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