babies yay!!!
i have to say, mine is more like a switch that goes on and off (sometimes with alarming frequency), though its pretty much out of the question right now as The Husband is happy to take care of the cats during the week while I am traveling but doesn't want to do the same for a human baby.
Good for you. You tell 'em! (And how exciting!)
You are so right---there IS no perfect time, career-wise, to have a baby, so why not just have the baby when YOU want to have the baby. Good luck in this new phase---how exciting!
Yay! yay for making the decisions you want to make instead of those that other people expect you to make!
My baby switch has been fading on over time. By the time we're ready, it's going to be blinding bright light.
Yeah, there's never a perfect time. Just the time that it happens. Very exciting to realize that you want to start trying! yay for babies
Sooooo, for the last 3 weeks I can't stop thinking about babies! In fact, when I see other pregnant women, I feel angry and resentful toward them for having a baby and I cant. At least you have a husband. I have a boyfriend who is also doing his PhD in a city 60 miles away who is TERRIFIED by the thought of babies. So, instead, I am at home, no husband, no baby, still no PhD and I can't even get a damn dog because I live in an apartment.
Any advice?
I completely agree with the sentiment. In fact, after I got married I told my in-laws to stop bugging me until 2012 (the estimated year +1 that I graduate).
Best of luck!
Yep. There is no right time for a baby. Plus, and this is crucial, you don't really get to decide. You never know how long it will take to concieve, and you never know how your pregnancy will go. It's all a gamble, so I say just do it if you feel lucky!
Also, just think about all those what-ifs as potential problems that need solving. Isn't that what scientists are supposed to be good at? If you can troubleshoot a tricky experiment, you can figure out how to handle any of those.
well, at least your baby switch went on when there is a sperm donor (ahem, husband) around... so it could be worse. Good luck!
Try whenever you want; but all other things being equal, sooner rather than later. Our doctor told us we would have to do IVF (if we wanted a baby genetically related to us, that is) about 3 days before my 30th birthday. Nothing like hearing you're really infertile right at the same time as you find that you are Distinctly Older than you Used to Be. It's not a reason to rush into having a baby when you're not ready, but a good reason to err on the side of early rather than late. Good luck.
I'm excited for you! There is definitely no "perfect" time and as acmegirl points out, you can't schedule it anyway. I also have a theory that when the brain has been telling the body "no!" for a while, the body needs a grace period to start hearing "yes!" and believing in it. (That is unscientific, naturally.)
Will Dr. S be ready by then? SodaBoy has never been able to get past the ulp phase. A consensus sounds terribly exciting.
"...the proverbial long jump off a short pier..." (I love that, may have to use that myself with some of my colleagues 
True, never a perfect time, but things always have a way of working themselves out as it was meant to be. Life changing decisions are rarely easy, good luck to you.
There is definitely no great time and thus no terrible time. Just make sure you have a clear path of continuous health insurance coverage. I'm not sure this is the appropriate point to say B'Sha'ah Tovah, but B'Sha'ah Tovah.
Crystal, I'm usually not this blunt, but (assuming I'm interpreting your comment correctly) dump the boyfriend. I've seen too many people think that a significant other currently as no interest in children but in 5 years or after marriage things will change. It's one thing to worry, but it's another thing to not want children. I've even seen people get married before even discussing this (the wife just assumed the husband would want kids eventually) The end result is usually a relationship or marriage that ends 5 years later on the biological clock or someone who decides to become a parent, but is never really supportive or into it. (The very rare person has a personality change on this issue) Terror towards becoming a parent is a correct emotion, but not wanting kids is somethings else.... Sorry if I misinterpreted which one is your situation.
Oh, and to Crystal: if you want kids and he doesn't, this is not a match. DTMFA and find someone else.
Thank you for the advice- I really appreciate your bluntness (very refreshing).
I think you are right- we definitely have some talking to do. I know he wants kids, but he is a) younger than me and still in the video games playing mode and b) still terrified from an "oops I may be pregnant" scare last year. I certainly hope these things work themselves out soon.... because I can already tell that the second I get my PhD I am going to want to get pregnant. Sighhh
Thanks for the well-wishes. It is exciting! Still must graduate first! It's quite an incentive though it increases my dread of never finishing. Definitely very not up to us in certain ways, which is why I say 'try' rather than 'have a baby'. I hope the alarming fertility of my female relatives will be a good predictor.
BSCI, I'm almost certain we could at least buy into Dr. S's postdoc insurance- I've never heard of a situation where spouses aren't covered at all- but it might be expensive. It's just so uncertain. On the other hand, if he ends up being paid by HHMI, their insurance is awesome.
BerryBird, Dr. S was pretty much ready a couple years ago. 'But I know it's not the right time,' he said. Once he got over the initial you-want-them-now-oh-goodness freakout, he was fine with it.
EGF, I love your description. Searchlights on! BABY NOW!
Songbird, I think the body at least needs to be a little less stressed out. I like the elegance of your theory though.
Crystal, I'll email you, but yeah, getting on the same page is important. Also, he's in grad school and still in the college mentality of pizza and video games? Um. I'd think it's time to GROW UP.
My switch went off ages ago, I think. If I ever knew one thing, it is that I wanted a family. With children. I don't even want to wait until the end of my PhD (partly because of a medical condition that might make getting pregnant more difficult, partly because I'm just impatient). "They" can jump off the short pier, I totally agree.
Hope the health insurance issue works out; I'm glad I don't have to worry about this. Good luck for everything!
No perfect time. But the right people around you will want to make it work for you. Any person that doesn't support a woman in her pregnancy doesn't deserve to be a part of her life or job. Think of it as a screening tool for trolls!
I got pregnant in the middle of my post-doc, and will show up to my asst. prof. 6 months pregnant. We will move into a house when I am 5 months pregnant. There were a lot of what ifs, but you find that life just goes on, and people try to support you.
Well, I think no one should EVER wait, but based on my history, you'll understand, right? Heck at least you know all the best internet resources to go to now. 
I do think you could get the insurance lined up first just in case, being in the US and all. You never know what can happen, and you don't want them to exclude you based on being already pregnant, or being pregnant too close to the start of coverage or some other silly ass reason, right?
There's never a "right" time. However, once you have that child in your arms you'll have a hard time remembering what life was like before.
Wow. I was just having this conversation with Dr. Man. He woke up and told me that he wants a baby, but he'll wait for me. I'm very excited for you both!
Congrats! Exciting! Some chance we'll be trying around the same time, then. Like Amelie, I'm also not planning to wait until I'm done with my PhD, and so I let out a big huge cheer to the part where we don't put our lives on hold for the Ideal Career Trajectory! Yay! If enough people stop doing that, eventually we WILL manage to get people to realize that society has to make child-rearing work with careers to keep functioning in this modern age.
Yay! I found great comfort once we decided it was the right time-which was six years after I got my Ph.D. in chemistry. Fortunately, there were no problems with fertility.
My only addition is that it is not all wine and roses but it is also not all spit up and sleep deprivation. If I had known what I wonderful baby we would have and how he would lend perspective to all of our lives, I would have had him at the end of grad school. (I should add that in my field the lab work is reasonably safe for a developing fetus and the last months of grad school are usually spent writing rather than doing crazy experiments).
Parenthood is cool, exciting, and scary. Everyone ends out doing what words best for them.
While everyone ends out doing what works best for them-I can't type well while holding a baby in one hand. Sorry for all the typos in the previous comment.
Oh, Strugi, the right time was recently then?
Even I think it can sometimes be pretty crazy taking care of a fussy baby, and I've only been responsible for babies for daytimes and heard about the nighttimes - I've never lived through the whole thing myself.
right, and if so, congratulations! almost forgot that part.
There is never a right time.
But sooner is better than later, because later runs you the risk of fertility issues and you have a baby at 42 after 3 rounds of IVF.
But you knew that.
How exciting! There really is no perfect time. You just know when you know.
I've always said that you know you really want a baby if you were living in a cardboard box and still wanted to get pregnant.
I will also go with B'Sha'ah Tovah.
I had my first two months after I defended, and a month after I turned in the final manuscript. Had I not been pregnant, I would have probably defended earlier. The whole nauseous and tired part. But oh well. I also spent most of the two months between the defense ad her birth on some form of bed rest, but again-- oh well.
Hope all these things end up remaining someone else's stories to you, and you sail through the whole thing.
Yay! Babies! Never a perfect time, but I think things have a way of working themselves out. It's a lot of work, but so far very worth it. Babies!!
I like the "screw it" strategy. I mean, if a university, institution, or company won't hire you because you are pregnant, do you really want to work there in the first place.
Best of luck with making people.
I've always wondered about the clock thing. I don't think I had one. And if it did go off I wonder if I would have just kept hitting the snooze button. I found myself pregnant despite myself at 31. And then despite my ambivalence, I had three girls within 3.5 years. Needless to say, life has changed in many ways.
I wrote about my journey with these changes in a blog at http://raisingsmartgirls.wordpress.com/.
You might enjoy reading Sylvia Ann Hewitt’s Creating a Life: Professional Women and the Quest for Children. It is a very interesting look at the real problems with delaying having children in order to establish a career. IVF isn't the magic pill that will make children happen whenever you finally decide you are ready. It also discusses the very real problems with the feminist movement in America (that while feminists made great strides in the workplace, very little thought was given to finding solutions to support working mothers - like very little time maternity leave compared to places like Switzerland who has up to 18 months of parental leave following the birth of a child).
I can say that working in a laboratory for 12 years had been ego-boosting, exciting and intellectually stimulating, but having a family has been the most soul-ful work I have ever done in my life. After my second daughter was 9 months old, I decided to stay home (being gone for 11 hours out of the day and then coming home to the "second shift" just was getting impossible. I plan to return to work in two years (wish me luck!) but for now, I'm grateful to have had time to be with them. I consider myself to be their first teacher, and it's a role I have come to really enjoy.
Good luck to you Jenny (and others wanting children). All my past accomplishments are sitting in boxes now, and as much as I love having proof of my successful career, they don't love me back like my girls do. And watching my girls grow and develop their minds is just wonderful.
I have my 6 year old in my lap as I type, with her arms around me, and I can tell you children are so worth it, even when they do sidetrack a career for a little while.
Anyway, that's my two cents and then some.
KC
There absolutely is NO perfect time to have a baby. I went off birth control about two weeks before my defense and was pregnant 3 months later.
But can I give you a tad bit of unsolicited advice? You had mentioned in a previous post that you thought you and Dr. S would get a dog after moving to your new city... If you're thinking to get pregnant, I would put off getting the dog until the babe is a bit older... Our Pup is EXTREMELY jealous of the baby, and it's basically impossible to give the dog as much attention as she deserves while the Bean is still so young... So I constantly feel guilty.
Anyway, just a thought.
But yes, babies are wonderful. I'm glad you and Dr. S are in the wonderful planning stages!
ScienceMama, I was going to get a dog instead of trying for a wee one, but I agree that waiting until after there's a baby is probably the course of more prudence! We'll have to see how it goes.
That is exactly what I decided, and so far it is working perfectly. I defend a month before the baby is due this summer. I have some fellowships in the works that I may or may not take, and my Mom can come help this summer. The morning sickness was early when I didn't need to be as productive and now in my second (honeymoon) trimester I am getting good work done.
However you do it, you are right - there is no perfect time so just go for it and have fun.
Ohhhhh, I'm so sorry I'm so very behind in blog reading.
I am absolutely where you are now. Must have baby. Must have baby RIGHT NOW.
Hubby and I just have this small problem of living hundreds of miles apart.....
I'm so glad you've decided to take the leap! Good luck!
I'm with you & nearly everyone above - screw it, there's no "best" time to have a baby, except the time when one wants one.
Then again - I got very, very, very lucky: I got pregnant exactly three months after I finished my ph.d.. The readiness question is an interesting one: I was ready before I found out but felt very not ready when I found out, when my man was ready, then he was not ready for a while but I was, until we synched up somewhere around week 8 of my pregnancy. In some ways he is a bit less ready but I think it's harder for him because he's not living with the reality of impending baby (in 2-3 weeks) day in, day out. Male friends often tell me they really only get it about the baby and connect when they get the first smile from their child.
But back to screw it: damnit, we need a revolution anyway. Employers have no fucking right to discriminate against us because the work that goes into producing the next generation of human beings is considered detrimental to their profit margin (or departmental prestige). I mean, their profit margin will go even further down if there is no next generation.
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