mon general

'and she's exploiting the hell out of it.' Hillary Clinton? Exploiting? Colour me... oops, maybe not.
corporal waldo | 03.26.08 - 11:59 pm | #

Oh, how the wingers love to feign offense at trumped-up reverse-racist comments.

Lately, they've been buying tee shirts, buttons, and bumper stickers that say, "Typical White Person" - in order to show solidarity with Obama's abused gramma, and oppressed white people everywhere.
.
bob the hog | 03.27.08 - 2:03 am | #

Let's put all our cards on the table. And then let's unzip our pants below the table. Now try to play Gin Rummy while you're getting your...shit, I forgot what I was going to write about.

++++
mjs | Homepage | 03.27.08 - 2:21 am | #

Well, if you can't beat The Vast Right Wing Conspiracy, join 'em.
Mentis Fugit | Homepage | 03.27.08 - 2:45 am | #

Once again Hillary has demonstrated her extraordinary patience with errant menfolk, gently scolding them when they are naughty boys and then enfolding them in her forgiveness when they pay back in kind for her solicitude by helping out in her obsessive, almost messianic, desire to take her rightful seat in the Oval office. Now, I ask you, why won't this uppity colored boy just humbly settle for the number two spot on the ticket with a rousing, "Yowsuh, Missy Clintons" and be done with it?
purvis ames | 03.27.08 - 6:02 am | #

General SIR:

Its my considered opinion that we-all have arrived at one sorry sumbitch state of affairs in this Greatest Nation in the History of Earthkind when a combat zone hardened vet put in harms way under the threat of enemy fire and artillery whatnots maybe even sabre charges on secret humanitarian assignments to avoid crushing the faiths of innocent impressionable vulnerable childrens who dont want nothing in the world more than to read a goddamned poem to someone of the female persuasion married to a real important personage optimally a prince of England but queen of America'll do - gets denied the occasional foe pause and poking a little fun or a stick or something at what reliable sources inform us [I pointin' at mr purvis ames up yonder] appears to be potentially a "uppity c...... ..y" which would explain the overreaction of so many tax and spend bleeding heart you-know-what-lovin' freedom hating l......l traitors in the soft-head Mark cyst Lennon press and media.

Just had to get that said - SIR.
LabDancer | 03.27.08 - 6:38 am | #

Mon General Sir,
That's what I've been saying. THAT IS THE TRUTH, Senator Clinton has finally come round to our way of thinking

As an Uncle Ruckus (Boondocks) of the highest order I have no choice but than to agree that we black folk are not ready to lord it over white people, why next thing you know all the Cadillac Moms will move into the Suburbs.

Also I hate to imagine what will happen to the White house, will they start calling it the Black House, No Sir, our founders called it the white house for a reason.

Even more importantly some of the rich Clinton Supporters (the only ones that really count) have started to see the light as well, telling the majority leader, an uppitty UNman to keep quiet, while they steal the nomination.
baba | 03.27.08 - 8:56 am | #

Mr. Cohen,
The republican party has done more to DAMN the United States than God could ever be asked to do. Of course their 'reality' thinks of it as the new and improved United States. Except for Alabama of course.
Dick | 03.27.08 - 9:41 am | #

Proposed question for St. Hillary to use in her next debate with O'Saddama. I mean Husseinak. You know who I mean.

"Sen. Obama, do you support reinstating pastor Wright to his official position with the United Church of Christ so that he can be properly judged, denounced and expelled by a church tribunal?"

A classic goddamned if you say "yes" or damngodded if you say "no" question. Of course, it's better if Obama has this put to him by Sister Hillary than by McCain. Because there's so much difference between those two...
Bukko in Australia | 03.27.08 - 10:08 am | #

The good thing is, the polls show that Obama hasn’t really been hurt by this whole Wright fiasco; or, more to the point, his speech last Tuesday worked. His poll numbers dipped slightly, then bounced back. Which I think proves the point: Those of us with half (or more) of a functioning brain aren’t really that surprised, or offended, or even bothered, by the fact that some African Americans feel a bit of anger and frustration from time to time and even (gasp!) raise their voices on occasion … In fact, I’m surprised that it doesn’t happen more often, given how unequal things still are in this country. Like Mike Huckabee said (yes, that Mike Huckabee):

“Sometimes people do have a chip on their shoulder, and resentment, and you have to just say, ‘I probably would, too. I probably would, too. And in fact, I may have had more of a chip on my shoulder had it been me.’”

I know for a fact that if I had to live through the bullshit Rev. Wright endured, I’d be permanently pissed. In fact, I am permanently pissed, and I really don’t have an excuse.

Then again, I’m half Irish and all lawyer. So, there ya go …
Dave von Ebers | Homepage | 03.27.08 - 10:34 am | #

General Sir-
If, by the extension of the thought process profferred by HRC, a swarthy brown-skin, like myself is kinda-feared; so if I get a lot of sun this summer, you know, under the whip of the Whitedevilslavemaster, I'll be more feared.
"More importantly, she knows that many whites perceive blacks as being a dangerous, subversive element in our society, and she's exploiting the hell out of it."
People in Utah know this and I, too, plan to leverage this fear. bwaahaahaaa
(the above statement does in no way purport that the writer has any way of knowing or understanding the angst of the Black American Experience. No such knowledge is expressed or implied)
Cpl. Stevan | 03.27.08 - 11:08 am | #

gen. sir:

i think it may be time to have the tin foil on your cap maintenanced, it's clearly interfering with the radio and tv signals you should be receiving.

contrary to your assertion, sen. clinton, only when asked by an interviewer, specifically stated that it wasn't any of her business what sen. obama should have done. however, again only when asked by the interviewer, she did state that if it had been her pastor, she'd have left that church.

i guess she should have just sat there mute.

as well, sen. obama, in a pre-taped speech, continued to rub salt in that wound, giving joe sixpack more rationalization for not voting for him. not because he's swarthy skinned mind you, but because he's anti-american.

sen. obama let the genie out of the bottle, that's his problem, not sen. clinton's.

might want to have the mechanic check that hat out.
cpinva | 03.27.08 - 11:48 am | #

wow!
that is a bold move; however, if she really wants to appeal to the fox crowd, she should demand that barack declare mohammed as a false profit and that he change his name to jed clampett.
lewis stoole | 03.27.08 - 11:53 am | #

oh my, where is my head at...
that is false prophet, as in the antichrist, not false profit as in bears stearns
lewis stoole | 03.27.08 - 11:56 am | #

i thought jerry falwell said that america was damned because of all the homosexuals and that 9-11 and katrina were proof???
lewis stoole | 03.27.08 - 11:58 am | #

Cpinva –

How’s the weather in Bizarro World these days? We’re in for some more snow …
Dave von Ebers | Homepage | 03.27.08 - 12:18 pm | #

i guess she should have just sat there mute.

Yup! Those were her only two choices! Say nothing at all, or condemn Pastor Wright as strongly as she could. No other alternative!

And I'll be she was shocked--shocked!--when the newspaper owned by the godfather of the Vast Right-Wing Conspiracy asked her a question designed to hurt the Democratic front-runner. I know I was!
Notorious P.A.T. | 03.27.08 - 12:34 pm | #

Love you General.
The Devil You Know | 03.27.08 - 12:45 pm | #

DvE: Thanks for yesterday's response.
Unfortunately I've got to keep posting this:

Clinton has been in a 30 year relationship with a "purposely low-profile" religious group whose members act on the "Family" belief that christianity should be the official theology of the USA and all decisions sought to be made with pleasing christ in mind.

I'm not one to put much credence into the reality of the NWO and its reported shadow government, and there are some people who say we shouldn't be bringing "it" up.

"It" should be brought up.

"It" should be brought up at all MSM outlets.

"It" is not a matter of religious freedom.

"It" is a matter of civil re-direction.

"It" should be discussed to death, just like this BS with Rev Wright.

There is being religious, and then there is discounting the value of anyone who isn't.

(Please don't make me keep posting this until I see it on FOX, I'll go mad)
(Sorry General, sir, I just can't sign on for the "Rapture Junket".)
vigilant | 03.27.08 - 2:08 pm | #

N-> Pat.

Yeah. He is in the same CULT as her.

GOPers aren't the only ones who engage in Diversionary Tactics.
vigilant | 03.27.08 - 2:10 pm | #

DvE

"if the Jack Boot fits"

LOL
vigilant | 03.27.08 - 2:12 pm | #

General Sir,
"I think it may be time to have the tin foil on your cap maintenanced, it's clearly interfering with the radio and tv signals you should be receiving."
Have we changed the code, General???
cpinva:
I assume your reference is to Obama's 'race speech' - What sort of extension/ assumption / triangulation / inferrence did you have to hear from Fox to come up with this - "not because he's swarthy skinned mind you, but because he's anti-american." and this - "sen. obama let the genie out of the bottle, that's his problem, not sen. clinton's."
That bigass genie ( not the Disney / Robin Williams) has been out of the bottle for decades; does Birmingham, Selma, Watts mean anything to you? And if "guilt" by association (a favorite meme of people too focus -challenged) is a sin, what does silence say of those people of the cloth who, from their respective pulpits of chrisianity, turn a blind eye and ear to this immoral war, this albatross of debt around our children's necks?
Au contrare, whomever is behind the nom de plume of cpinva, this soldier has a firm grip on reality and his helmet is well modulated.

Reading you five - by - five from behind the zion curtain, Sir.
Cpl. Stevan | 03.27.08 - 3:10 pm | #

gen. sir: i think it may be time to have the tin foil on your cap maintenanced...

You can have my hat, sir. It stops mind rays, delegate math, and sniper fire. "White is the New Black" is written across the rim, but in fusilli macaroni, so you can just scrape it off if you want.
bob the hog | 03.27.08 - 3:18 pm | #

cpinva, damn, that must be some mighty fine tasting kool-aid you're drinking.
patriotboy | 03.27.08 - 3:21 pm | #

Gen’rul, I’m hopin’ it’s not Kool-Aid but some new strain of weed.

’Cuz that would be worth its weight in brain cells, ask me.

Not that I’m advocating smoking illicit substances. Maybe just, um, standing downwind of people smoking illicit substances, is all.

Cheers
Dave von Ebers | Homepage | 03.27.08 - 3:25 pm | #

And, of course, at times like these we turn, as always, to the Gospel of Joe Strummer:

Back in the garage with my bullshit detector
Carbon monoxide makin’ sure it’s effective …

Amen, brothers and sisters. Amen.
Dave von Ebers | Homepage | 03.27.08 - 3:28 pm | #

cpinenut,
"i guess she should have just sat there mute."
No, but you should STFU. I am so sick of these Clinton kooks and their racist, bluedog crap. Do they really think the democrats and this country are better off with the way her campaign is being run? Give it a rest pinenut because whoever wins is going to buried piles of Cheney shit for the next half century and they all gonna look black when it's all said and done
popin-in | 03.27.08 - 3:40 pm | #

oops, temper temper now ~ "to buried piles" should be, "to be buried in piles"
I'm a little exciteable today ~ to much hate and not enough..... whatever
popin-in | 03.27.08 - 3:52 pm | #

There is a reason that Rupert Murdoch has been providing financial aid Hillary Clintstone and her Pleistocene Era politics.

I think Hillary the Corporatist Party is getting worried that they are going to be able to stuff the WH with a waldo unit from either of their wholly owned subsidiaries, the GOP or the GOP Wing of the Democratic Party. It's panic time.

The latest thug move is 20 of the largest billionaire/corporate donors are going to stop supporting all Democratic voters, if they don't rig the rules so that Clintstone gets all the super-delegates. They are attempting to blackmail Pelosi into manipulating things so it works out that way (Move-on.org is organizing a petition to remind Pelosi to show some spine). these are the desperate acts of worried people.
Paul | 03.27.08 - 5:33 pm | #

Who would Superdelegate Jesus vote for?

That, friends, is the question we should be asking ourselves. Senator Hillary is willing to sit down and submit to the Vast Right-Wing Conspiracy Puppetmaster himself. Does that not speak well of her C-in-C potential? Will she not also kneel before our Saudi masters, when they call her, yea, even in a stifling burkha?
She has instructed her followers, like cpinva above, to vote for Senator Cain if Senator Hussein Obama steals the popular vote from her. Commendable, for a Goldwater Girl.

I cannot help you with your tinfoil hat, Sir.
But if you'd like some tinfoil communion wafers, I am your obediant servant.
Just don't chew them.
It ruins the transmissions.

Wondering if Hillary and Cain will change parties;
the Rev. Jerry Gloryhole | 03.27.08 - 6:39 pm | #

Rev. Jerry:
You must not have a mouth full of mercury-silver fillings. The thought of tinfoil commumion wafers even TOUCHING a filling makes my whole body twitch, and not in the good way.
Yeggggggh.

(Do you maybe have some tinfoil suppositories, instead?)
mutzali | 03.27.08 - 8:47 pm | #

I do. But those are only for Catholics.
the Rev. Jerry Gloryhole | 03.27.08 - 8:59 pm | #

Reverend Jerry Gloryhole:

I wanted to say, first of all, thank you for lunch on Monday. And I'm really sorry I spilled the Blood-O-The Lamb all over your surplice and the Ferragamos.

Aluminium suppositories? Are those anything like a "Steely Dan"?
democommie™™™™™©®ç åü | 03.27.08 - 9:34 pm | #

You know, Demo, a fella can't go 'round makin' references to William S. Burroughs without raisin' an eyebrow or two ...

I mean, I'm just sayin' ...
Dave von Ebers | Homepage | 03.27.08 - 10:22 pm | #

obviously, since we are all fox viewers, the kool-aid is fine this time of night.
i like the ken kesey koolaid myself.
it is very relaxing to watch pappa bear talk about stuff in the world.
i wish he were more big and furry aand purple with spots.
lewis stoole | 03.30.08 - 2:47 am | #

i mean, zig-zagging spots because the stationary spots are boring.
ddrink that koolaide my rfriends.
lewis stoole | 03.30.08 - 2:52 am | #

ddrink
lewis stoole | 03.30.08 - 2:53 am | #

ok. there was a time when the spots on pappa bear's head formed a constellation...what was it???
i did not react fast enough to note it in my log book. i have seen this one before when he was also called into action on the fox network news, but i have lost my notes. was it colored greeen?
lewis stoole | 03.30.08 - 3:07 am | #

after the rrewind, i see that it is purple.
aries purple.
it seemed to look like a vein, but i have repositioned the purple line, and now it is clear that it is aries rising.
f**k, we are in a time of war, but i think a recession can also be constrrued as a time of war since those lame f**k ancestors from 0 era probably have never heard of a recession since they traded in salt. let me figure this one out...
lewis stoole | 03.30.08 - 3:14 am | #

i have weighed out the salt...
we are fu*ked.
hug your neighbor.
lewis stoole | 03.30.08 - 3:18 am | #

In times like these, lewis, we must remember to charge our neighbor for hugs.
Mama's gotta eat.
the Rev. Jerry Gloryhole | 03.30.08 - 3:21 pm | #

that is good, my good rev, because i am now covered in purple fur with zig-zagging spots--very huggable. i had many hugs today at church thanks to my condition. god speed to you.
lewis stoole | 03.30.08 - 8:09 pm | #

i think i made $2 plus change...
lewis stoole | 03.30.08 - 8:10 pm | #

bukko--
are you now an ex-pat???
wtf???
lewis stoole | 03.30.08 - 8:25 pm | #

bob the hog
i like your combat hat design.
now if it could be swathed in a fine dried herbal tomato paste with some sort of tvp, i think you would have a combat hit!
just dump a canteen of water over the top, let it boil in the iraqi sun, and wa la, you have a fine penne arabbiata!
genious!!!
lewis stoole | 03.30.08 - 8:34 pm | #

fyi...
i have had a STEELEY DAN, and it was not pleasant
lewis stoole | 03.30.08 - 8:36 pm | #

fyi...
i have had many STEELEY DAN's, and they were not pleasant.
lewis stoole | 03.30.08 - 8:42 pm | #

fyi...
i have just had a STEELEY DAN.
lewis stoole | 03.30.08 - 8:48 pm | #

it was unpleasant.
lewis stoole | 03.30.08 - 8:50 pm | #

fyi,
i am now swathed in a fine penne arrabriatta sauce.
god speed

to me.

may the cat-o-nine bee merciful...
lewis stoole | 03.30.08 - 9:10 pm | #

the question you should ask at this point,
is how can i type thisw fast in this position???

it is difficult.


yeet strangely familiar.
lewis stoole | 03.30.08 - 9:22 pm | #

oh i aam an ex-pat.
ex-patty pat paat and pat again.
thumpity thump.
god speed.
lewis stoole | 03.30.08 - 9:29 pm | #

ok, so my brass butt wasn't maade of brass; f thaat.
we all haave brass butts made of glass, and i think that is the lesson learned. god speed to coltrina annd her whip. at least she was female so i know thaat i am not gay. god speed to you
lewis stoole | 03.30.08 - 9:43 pm | #

i am glad i could sharre this experience with you as my friends are not as open-minded, the motheerf---eer's, literally.
lewis stoole | 03.30.08 - 9:45 pm | #

geez, i have just realized that i am going straight to hell, boy; whaat do you thiiink of that???
lewis stoole | 03.30.08 - 9:56 pm | #

just dropping by.
hell is not so bad.
we have refreshments and beer is everywhere.
lewis stoole | 04.01.08 - 5:09 am | #

ff..
they put olives in the beer.
thi8s truly is hell.
lewis stoole | 04.01.08 - 5:31 am | #