General, Sir!

If we vote according to your directions, do we get to have purple fingers?

When I voted and cut-and-pasted as a minion of some of the other patriotic, conservative, righteous blogs, all we got were these lousy brown noses.

These colors don't run; they'll walk all over someone,
Capt. Twelve A.M. Midnight, E.S.T., C.E.
CapMidnight | 01.11.06 - 1:03 am | #

General, dear: Young Robbie seems a mite confused. I can't imagine why.

Sharper than a serpent's tooth, I say.
MzNicky | Homepage | 01.11.06 - 1:05 am | #

I can imagine his reaction to coming here for the first time and seeing that post.
patriotboy | Homepage | 01.11.06 - 1:14 am | #

Sir,

despite your best efforts, Robbie seems to be way ahead of Atlas Enhanced. I fear your Dilbert defeating prowess is not transferable!
O weeping and gnashing of teeth!

o/t I know this is both lame and belated, but what is your connection to Irish Spring soap?
MaryCh | 01.11.06 - 1:51 am | #

It's a manly soap, MaryCH.
patriotboy | Homepage | 01.11.06 - 2:12 am | #

Manly, yes, but I like it too!
Major Woody | 01.11.06 - 4:23 am | #

Usually, these Jews are a little more circumspect about their sinful refusal to accept Jesus than this robbie person.
And, to defy His General is extreme folly.
I will pray for him even as I watch the Alito confirmation hearings.
I have been wondering, should I annoint the TV set with a cooking oil like Crisco, or should I go right to the 10W30 motor oil?
Capability Jones | 01.11.06 - 6:09 am | #

Capability, perhaps you should use extra Virgin olive oil.
WhattheH | 01.11.06 - 8:59 am | #

Reporting to the general:

Voted. Young Frenchman is pretty far ahead of neocon hater.
zenyenta | Homepage | 01.11.06 - 9:33 am | #

I have seen this "Jesus" you speak of - I even went to his theme park.

I have video.


My God does not sing and dance.

(Although He has done quite the tap dance from time to time.)
Robbie | Homepage | 01.11.06 - 9:59 am | #

I was right? Sweet.
mel gibson | Homepage | 01.11.06 - 11:18 am | #

Sir,
Is there some trick to voting? I don't see anything in their drop down menu>
Sgt Dan | 01.11.06 - 11:20 am | #

Sir,
Jesus Tap-dancing Christ! I just checked the voting and young Robbie has taken a commanding lead.

Capability,
Be sure to use an evergreen branch and not your oil spritzer from the kitchen. It only counts if you use a living branch, and you make the sign of the cross over the screen from left to right if you're Roman, or right to left if you're Eastern rite or Lutheran. You have to pick one.
Jackie_O | 01.11.06 - 11:20 am | #

Since when are French and gay not one in the same? I demand an explanation of that comment.
Je demande!!!
Col. Klink | 01.11.06 - 11:25 am | #

Liebe Capability Jones!

Please don't listen to WhattheH, as extra virgin olive oil is for the Latin races and their naughty Greek counterparts who mold nude sculptures in a most uncivilized manner.

Go with your gut and trust your instincts on this one, motor oil is what Republican Jesus would prefer.
Col. Klink | 01.11.06 - 11:31 am | #

Sir! Thy will be done. Sir!
John West | Homepage | 01.11.06 - 12:01 pm | #

I'm not going anywhere near the thing. When Jpost went registration only I got this incredible amount of spam.

I don't know why anyone would want to win a contest hosted by Conrad Black's birdcage liner and israelycool.com anyway. If I won anything associated with it I'd die of shame.
Ed Marshall | Homepage | 01.11.06 - 1:13 pm | #

Eh, fuck it, he gets a vote.
Ed Marshall | Homepage | 01.11.06 - 1:35 pm | #

You'll notice, Ed, on the top of my Jesus-Hating blog it states my lack of shame.

So thanks for your vote.

You guys wanna help me out in some other categories?

I'm up for Jewish Humor, Jewish Culture and Personal Blog, too.



Your now-faithful soldier.
Robbie | Homepage | 01.11.06 - 2:30 pm | #

So it is written, so it shall be done.
Catholic Jackson | 01.11.06 - 3:35 pm | #

Robbie,
We often remind ourselves of what a friend we have in Jesus' General.
Jackie_O | 01.11.06 - 3:37 pm | #

I knew Robbie would get in line, once it was clear that there was something in it for him.
But, watch your ass Boy!
That PamAtlas has some heavy hitters on her side! She is a LGF Minion.
You know, the guys who shot up the Koran!
Capability Jones | 01.11.06 - 3:49 pm | #

He's up to 42% Sir!

I've seen nothing like it from the French since Emperor Bonepart marched the Grand Armée on Austerlitz. Sacre blue!
Col. Klink | 01.11.06 - 4:53 pm | #

Well, despite our best efforts to hold the crossiant-baking, quiche-eating homosexual frenchman down, our Pamela is drastically sagging, like the breasts of little brown people you see in those National Geographic magazines, in the polls. Alas, if I only had more than my paltry four computers with which to cast my vote...

Maybe I should get a job with Diebold and prevent this kind of democracy from happening again. After all, it worked so well in Florida and Ohio...
Moses | 01.11.06 - 5:22 pm | #

I'm new to this.

Is 'neo-con' just a politcally 'correct' way of saying 'jew' ?
skotty | 01.11.06 - 6:07 pm | #

Nice try skotty.

neocon is a term for describing a proponant of disasterous foreign policies.
Gen. JC Christian, patriot | Homepage | 01.11.06 - 6:33 pm | #

You know I was going to demur a bit and conjecture that a randite probably wouldn't fit into the neo-conservative scene. They were agnostic to supportive of domestic social projects.

Then I looked through her blog and all I can find is a steady stream of insane, paranoid, jingoism. As far as I know Pam could be ready to nationalize the entire apparatus of capitalism and put the whole mighty machine in the service of the dictatorship of the proletariat to go kill Iranians, Syrians, Lebanese, Chinese, perhaps go liberate Europe from their enslavement to the mighty Muslim Empire.

Maybe "nutjob" would have been a better appelation.
Ed Marshall | Homepage | 01.11.06 - 6:51 pm | #

General! Sir!

Little Green Footballs only has 36% of the vote in Best Israel Advocacy Group B. Isn't there anything we can do for them?

Respectfully,
JillK. | Homepage | 01.11.06 - 7:31 pm | #

Sir,
Permission to add my own dfinition of neocon sir. I've done a lot of research. I even choked down a book on Leo Strauss. Neocon is nothing more than a euphemism for fascist.
Sgt Dan | 01.11.06 - 7:58 pm | #

Sir,

Voted for Robbie. As ordered.
jackmac | 01.11.06 - 8:07 pm | #

Sir,
Begging your pardon, Sir. I have a new report from the Department of Homeland Security for your scrutiny.
http://www.vin.com/WebLink.plx?U...ov.safenow.org/
Jackie_O | 01.11.06 - 9:00 pm | #

Jackie_O: Thanks! Important safety tips, people.
MzNicky | Homepage | 01.11.06 - 10:15 pm | #

Jill: I too noted LGF's alarming score in its category.

General, Sir? We await your command so that we may cohesively institute correctional action in this regard, Sir!
MzNicky | Homepage | 01.11.06 - 10:21 pm | #

Neo-Con also means "Neo-Confederate" in some circles.
Although, all Neo-Confederates are Neo-Conservatives as well.
Capability Jones | 01.11.06 - 10:40 pm | #

Vous êtes terribles! Ce n'est past gentil ce que vous faites. Laissez les pauvres petit Footballs vert tranquil! Just for that I am posting a picture of a hottie in a blasphemous christ killer t-shirt. Take that Jesus' General. And fer chrissakes, will you PLEASE fix the hebrew on your banner? Didn't I already give you the proper hebrew for that??

Y'all kill me.
ck | Homepage | 01.11.06 - 11:53 pm | #

I've looked over LGF's opponents. God, they're a scary bunch. Meryl Yourish seems to be the sanest one. I can't bring myself tp pimp for her.
Gen. JC Christian, patriot | Homepage | 01.12.06 - 12:35 am | #

Dammit CK, I used your Hebrew. Maybe the different font threw it off.

How does this look: "In Hebrew"
Gen. JC Christian, patriot | Homepage | 01.12.06 - 12:37 am | #

Sir! Thank you Sir for the orders! Thy will be done. Sir!
Berkeley Guy | Homepage | 01.12.06 - 12:54 am | #

nah it's ok now. sort of. there is a space between the 2nd and 3rd characters from the left. that space should be between the 3rd and 4th characters. once you fix that then it's perfect.

Maybe you were thrown off after your sensibilities were shocked by our babe in the christ killer t-shirt. yeah i killed him. and if he ever shows his ass around here, i'll kill him again. there's nothing this jew likes better than a crucifiction. and a good barbecue. not neccessarily in that order.
ck | Homepage | 01.12.06 - 5:02 am | #

How exactly did Charles Johnson get into a Best Jewish or Israeli blog contest anyway?
Ed Marshall | Homepage | 01.12.06 - 10:15 am | #

General, Sir
'I've looked over LGF's opponents. God, they're a scary bunch'
I read every one of those blogs, and they scare the bejeesus outame. I can understand your reluctance, as I was depressed after reading them. I just could not vote for any of them. Sorry, Sir, I'll retire and self discipline.
WhattheH | 01.12.06 - 1:43 pm | #

I went to the Atlas Shrugs site today and it is virtually unreadable.
I literally couldn't figure out what she was talking about.
I got that she hates Woolcot and equates calling someone a neocon to Jewbashing and wants everyone to think Ted Kennedy is a killer but she is preaching so hard to the choir that she is unintelligible. Thankfully, she will be converting no new recruits with this incoherent, bile spewing, homophobic, blathering mess of a blog. Hatespeak generally needs to be an easy read to work.
Thanks General for letting me know of yet another new minefield out there in the blogosphere.
WeCanFixThisMess | 01.14.06 - 3:40 pm | #