I'm telling you, General, the day, nay --- the SECOND that they come out with an oral spermacide for MEN --- I am SOOOOOOOOOOO going on a serious road trip, and hitting every single beer keg in my path to this waste-of-jism's cave/rock-from-under-which-it-crawled.
That way, fewer maggots in the future, see? Tapering-off.
Anntichrist S. Coulter |
Homepage |
01.13.06 - 8:05 pm | #
Annti, Can I be of assistance?
GoodGrief |
01.13.06 - 8:38 pm | #
what a betttufil poem for a lady who stood defending the brown people's house from being destroyed.
May God placed Rachel Corrie among the saints.
Anonymous |
01.13.06 - 9:15 pm | #
Annti,
I am so there on the road trip idea! And I know human physiology very well!
Please stop spreading lies, General. Only anti-semitic, anti-Zionist people make such tasteless remarks, so surely our Hebrew allies would never write something that awful. Someone should call the Anti-Defamation League and report the anti-semitic smearing of these fine, upright defenders of Israel, who are taking care of our Christian Holy Land until the Rapture comes and the Lord vaporizes those perfidious Jews right out of existence.
John |
01.13.06 - 9:33 pm | #
General, Sir
I'm speechless, a situation which would have been astonishing to both exes.
Annti and Jill, I'll drive. I'm quite good at intimidation - 35 years in Corporate culture taught me well. I can strongarm someone who outweighs me, and I'm mean when cornered. Please let me drive, or at least ride shotgun.
WhattheH |
01.13.06 - 10:01 pm | #
RE: Fake Alito Profile on Google
Pulling shit like this is what causes us to lose Presidential elections -- we haven't won a Presidential election in almost a decade. In addition, without winning elections, we can't nominate our OWN to the Supreme Court. Nice going, jerkoff.
Adam |
01.13.06 - 10:13 pm | #
Adam, are you maybe freebasing and drinking whiskey?
Ed Marshall |
Homepage |
01.13.06 - 10:19 pm | #
Mon General
Let's not forget Misha at the anti-idiotarian rottweiler, who published pictures of Ms. Corries corpse, sneered at her parents and ran continual jokes about pizzas.
Those sick individuals who take pleasure in the suffering of others crawl under from under their rocks when war occurs, because they love to rub peoples' noses in the depravity that inevitably takes place.
They're like paedophiles; their gratification is not just from the actual abuse of innocence, but from the power they wield by their vindinctive betrayal of everyone who associated with the victim.
corporal waldo |
01.13.06 - 10:28 pm | #
Generaly I wouldn't "whore" myself around but PLEASE vote for me at
I promise I am VERY cute.
Cairo The Boxer |
Homepage |
01.13.06 - 11:31 pm | #
Adam:
If you're serious, then all I have to say to you is:
Fuck off
If you're pulling our leg, then all I have to say to you is:
Fuck off
Christ, it's enough to have to deal with trolls, but now this new breed of fake trolls is on the loose. They only believe in one thing: That stirring up shit to get a reaction is fun (for them). The General certainly stirs up shit; there is no doubt about that, but there's a big difference between what he does and what fake trolls do. HE has a DAMN good reason to rock the boat. Go-along, get-along Democrats like Joe Lieberman are part of the reason the General and the rest of us are forced to do this. What reason does a fake troll have for stirring things up? Only his own gratification. Why can't these fuckers just masturbate instead?
It makes no difference to me whether Adam is or isn't sincere. Either way he's worthless.
John |
01.14.06 - 12:30 am | #
John,
Do not be angry with Adam, the french spy. If he has nothing better to do than cry about the Alito (silent prayer: he who rightfully robs brown people of their rights and women of control over their uterus) showing his softer side, then so be it.
Personally, I don't think that the French have lost a single election because of the Great Alito. I believe it is because they have not slandered their opponents with the veracity and power that we, conservatives, have.
Also, There is great strength in being able to define what a free nation is, and then call your opponent "un-American." And unfortunately for the lieberals, we jesus fearing conservatives, have that strength.
So remember all the things that we are fighting fighting for John: 9-11, terrorism, terrorism, 9-11, terrorism, 9-11, 9-11, and terrorism.
Fighting with you until the end,
Major Paine
Major Paine |
Homepage |
01.14.06 - 12:57 am | #
*the word "fighting" is so important, I said it twice.
Major Paine
Major Paine |
Homepage |
01.14.06 - 12:59 am | #
Sir,
Don't forget the pizzas they had delivered to the brave Likudist death squads risking their lives with only a bit of heavy machinery between themselves and certain death at the hands of enemy combatants like Rachel.
Pizzas are flat, get it? Bulldozer, flat? I know it's subtle, but it's just so damn clever it reminds me of how witty they are everytime I recall it. And brave, did I mention brave?
melior in France |
01.14.06 - 1:09 am | #
John,
Indeed they want attention, as do we all! So give attention to the General's faithful soldiers and ignore the dreary trolls!
It's ever so much better for your blood pressure since Major Woody, Annti, WhattheH, Grimey, stinkeye, MzNickey, Colonel Klink, and all the others are ever so amusing!
Besides, all I'll ever call you on is your failure to deliver my big bag o' cash!
Jeezums, that Adam guy, is he like the original. You know the one that God made out of his own breath? If so he must had, like, a Super-sized anchovy, garlic and road-kill pie from Dominionist Pizza. All of the people who attack you for attacking the people who are attacking our way of life need to be attacked until they stop attacking, right?
Joe Lie-berman and John "Survivor" McCain are not the saviors of the center. They're both Reichwing Lite opportunists who are better predictors of political windshifts than any pollster could ever be. They salivate at the prospect of being able to control things like Bushco but never will because the far right and the true oligarchs do not trust them.
Excuse me, sir, for almost being real for a moment, there. I'm going to go finish off the other box of Entenmann's danish, drink another bottle of Patron and take, lemme see; 7,8,9 Adderall and 3 and maybe a half or so Prozac: that oughta make things right. I gotta go garage saling today; I always pay too much (but I'm writing somebody else's checks--s'okay.!)
democommie |
01.14.06 - 9:56 am | #
Hey, don't forget other great Pancake Corrie jokes.
Like this "human speedbump" roadsign. Also from my blog.
Any idiot dumb enough to stand in front of a running bulldozer, in a war zone in a place where he/she isn't seen and expect it to stop is stupid and deluded.
To explain to your readers who like to divide the planet into "white" and "brown":
They probably think in your terms, of "brown" and "white". They think that since they are "white" they'll be treated any differently from "brown" enemies of Israel. They're sadly mistaken. Being a white-trash is no guarantee of not getting harmed in a war zone between two "brown" people.
Rachel Corrie was flattened (and later faxed home to her parents) because she attempted to stop an IDF bulldozer from destroying a house which hid a smuggling tunnel. A tunnel used to smuggle hookers, drugs, explosives and weapons into Gaza.
Explosives like the ones which killed 3 Americans a few months later (hope you're all proud of her now).
If you wanna worship the moron, go ahead, you might as well call her Saint Corrie, Patron of smuggled eastern-european hookers, heroin, and explosives which killed her people.
OnlyInIsrael |
Homepage |
01.14.06 - 11:39 am | #
Did you know madam I'm Adam is the same backwards and forwards? Cool huh? So don't say fuck off adam, cause you might piss off madam.
Paul |
01.14.06 - 11:44 am | #
Annti: I'm in.
OII: Way bad karma, dude.
`
MzNicky |
Homepage |
01.14.06 - 1:01 pm | #
From everything I've read about the Rachel Corrie incident it appears that we will never know exactly what happened to her on that day. But even if her death was a total accident, which I concede is a distinct possibility, I still fail to see any humor in it. If something similar had happened to an Israeli settler I wouldn't find it amusing either.
OII, let me help you understand something: This is a satire site, designed to represent the ignorance, arrogance, narrow-mindedness, racism and hypocrisy of George Bush's Christian conservative base. As such, the General often deliberately makes ridiculous statements to expose the stupidity of these jingoistic, untra-conservative hyper-zealots. We know that all the people of the world (including those of our "ally" Israel) cannot be separated into just two groups: White and Brown. Jews, just like Americans, come in all sorts of shades and colors. However, much of Bush's conservative base only sees the world in two colors. That is part of what his satire is exposing. He even tried to tip off one of your pals to this when wrote in a previous thread:
Ephraim, all God's chosen are white and delightsome people. It says so in the Book of Mormon.
Gen. JC Christian, patriot | Homepage | 01.13.06 - 6:42 pm | #
But you just don't fucking get it, do you? Of course you'll say something like, "I know it's supposed to be satire, but all he's really doing is exposing his own hidden prejudices." That wouldn't be the first time some idiot made that accusation. The term "liberal fascist" is a term that Christian conservatives are fond of lobbing at us. No doubt you agree with them, a group of people who call you their ally but can't wait for God to destroy all Jews in the Rapture. Those are some good friends, eh?
Like I told Ephraim earlier, I don't mind opposing views being presented here. But to prattle on ad infinitum is just annoying. You've said everything that can be said to express your point of view, and no one is swayed. Give it up already. Can't you find anything else to do, or is your heart so full of hate that this is all that you've got left? If that's the case then let me speak in terms to which you'll more easily relate:
Religious trolls are not persuadable. That's why the word "fanatic" was coined They're looking for attention, so think of your blood pressure, soldier, and stand down.
I know you're right. I guess I've been in a bit of a foul mood recently. To see someone gleefully joking about a horrible death certainly doesn't help. At least I know that I won't be angry for very long, but some of these recent trolls are absolutely hopeless. Anger is all they have. Fuck them.
John |
01.14.06 - 3:05 pm | #
for the record, the israeli government has never once claimed that rachel corrie was defending a home hiding a smuggling tunnel. the home was slated to be destroyed as part of the creation of a "security buffer" along the rafah border.
this effort led to the destruction of over 2,500 palestinian homes, leaving over 15,000 homeless. see human rights watch's report, razing rafah for details. more here including satellite photos which show the unparalleled devastation wrought on civilian gazans.
these people weren't given compensation. they weren't given "one container" and an endless hotel stay on a government check, like the evacuees of gush katif. they had their houses destroyed en mass and were left to their own devices.
the mass demolitions did nothing to stop weapons tunnels, but rather served only to further impoverish and incite the palestinian population. these demolitions continued well through 2005, even in full-knowledge of the coming disengagement and the handing over of the rafah border.
that sounds more like collective punishment than exercising security concerns, and collective punishment, sir, is a war crime.
Mobius |
Homepage |
01.14.06 - 3:59 pm | #
omagod,onlyinisrael has saved the day. So, Rachel was standing there to prevent the hookers' from being stopped to travel.
Israel narratives make me wanna vomit.My prof called it a modern day fiction.I called it.. %$#^&&
You might fool the world,but not me.
Anonymous |
01.14.06 - 6:30 pm | #
there's a big difference between the jewish and israeli narratives and right-wing spin. do not denounce our history as myth or bullshit; but feel free to do so regarding the political spin given that history. doing so, however, requires learning enough to know the difference between truth and spin. your statement suggests that you haven't learned enough and makes it seem likely that you don't even care to.
Mobius |
01.14.06 - 6:43 pm | #
history is NOT made up with things like:
“Palestinians” never been in Israel before.
Amira Haas is my source about the Occupied Palestinian territory and she's an Israeli.Forgive me for sounding like another mean person who stereotypes your nation as such, but when the voice of your right wing nuts are so loud and lack ANY humanity to the Palestinians,I could not bring myself to respect your nation.
How could I forgive a nation who pretends to be a victim when it is killing Palestinians, destroying their houses in the name of " terror"?
Anonymous |
01.14.06 - 9:06 pm | #
For anyone who may be interested, the play, My Name is Rachel Corrie, taken from her diaries and starring Megan Dodds, is coming to New York in '06. It gives great insight into why she willingly put herself in harm's way for a cause she believed in.
stc |
01.14.06 - 9:45 pm | #
"I guess I've been in a bit of a foul mood recently. To see someone gleefully joking about a horrible death certainly doesn't help."
John: It's evermore difficult to not be in a foul mood these days. I totally hear you. And when any of us rejoice in the deaths of others, it only perpetrates the tragic absurdity of the human condition that we must overcome if we are to survive. Sometimes I wonder if we even deserve to (survive).
Anonymous: You forgive because you must. It's your "soul", or whatever, that matters, not what occurs during this particular lifetime.
MzNicky |
Homepage |
01.14.06 - 10:26 pm | #
first, i want to make a point that the reason i draw comparisons between israeli policies and south african policies under the apartheid regime; and the reason i allege that israel's acts of collective punishment constitute war crimes is not because i seek to empower or embolden israel's "enemies" and detractors, but rather because as a jewish person living in israel, i am insensed and outraged by israel's actions in the occupied territories and wish to see an end to the occupation. i do not believe that israel is inherently bad, nor that the israeli leadership is motivated by racism, ethnic supremacism, or messianic delusions. rather i think they are motivated by nationalistic goals that are an outgrowth of 2,000 years of persecution. it is entirely understandable, but the lengths to which they go to secure an ethnic majority are unacceptable. i raise the issue not to call for israel's destruction, but rather to foster internal dialogue within the jewish community and within the israeli community. to do so, one must counteract pro-israel propaganda which dismisses allegations of apartheid and war crimes as unfounded. once we can see what is going on and be honest and upfront about it, we can work to address it and change it.
as per, "How could I forgive a nation who pretends to be a victim when it is killing Palestinians, destroying their houses in the name of 'terror'?"
in the present day, israel's victimization may be overstated, but the casualties israel has suffered through palestinian violence are many, and these attacks reach back in history from far before the declaration of israel's independence in 1948.
nothing excuses the occupation, but as honest as israelis must be with their history, palestinians must be honest with theirs. jews have been getting attacked and killed by palestinians since at least the 1870s, and that speaks nothing to what transpired under ottoman rule.
the grand muffti of jerusalem, who was the president of the first palestinian state which was declared in gaza in 1950, was a staunch ally of hitler who sought to bring the final solution to the jews of palestine.
edwin black authored the transfer agreement, the book which first brought to light the zionists' collaboration with the nazis in the 1930s. if anything, that should be a testament to his impartiality. here's what he has to say about the grand muffti.
know the whole story. don't believe anyone's propaganda. don't believe anyone's hype. once you know the whole story you'll quickly see that nothing here is how it's been portrayed and perceived, from either side.
Mobius |
Homepage |
01.16.06 - 7:14 am | #
Mobius, you're hilarious. You come here begging for votes, and then to show that you're a "good" guy Jew, you talk about Israeli war crimes and collective punishment when you know that many homes in the area under discussion were used for tunneling and arms smuggling.
If you recall, you commented on a post of mine at Jewlicious showing an Ha'aretz review of the smuggling. Do you remember the comments made by one of the smugglers about how on the Israeli side, the families were paid sufficiently well that their home would easily be replaced if caught by the Israelis. On the other hand, if they were caught on the Egyptian side, the family could expect certain death?
Sure, you remember.
So here you come, vote-hat in hand and ready with the lowered eyes, shamed look and fawningly servile attempt to curry favor with visitors to this site by claiming how unjust Israel is and how terribly it behaves and how the occupation is inexcusable, etc., etc. By the way, you forgot to mention that Israel's presence in the West Bank (and previously Gaza) is sanctioned by international law, but I guess it's better to speak of it as pure evil so others see what a good guy you are.
But the joke is that when some anonymous schmuck follows your comments with vicious attacks on Israel using terms similar to yours but with the anger and hate that comments like yours would bring to anybody's heart, suddenly you begin to back off and attempt to "balance" matters by providing some education.
Wow, I'm sure that's working out well and all these folks won't walk away with the idea that Israel commits war crimes as told to them by this good Jewish guy called Mobius. Nope, I'm sure they'll ignore your using the prestige of, say, Human Rights Watch to vilify Israel and instead walk away thinking about the Grandmufti talking to the Nazis.
It's spelled Mufti, by the way. Grandmuffti is a character that exists only on Jewlicious because adding an F changes the name's meaning somewhat. Maybe you can find a Human Rights Watch article about that, Mobius. While you're searching for the article, can you also locate for us where Human Rights Watch was during the Durban conference? How did they vote?
Oh never mind, just keep talking about war crimes. Wouldn't want to confuse anybody.
The Middle |
Homepage |
01.18.06 - 1:52 am | #
Ooh The Middle! Harsh-O-Ramma! But let's ignore the pandering for votes for a moment, undignified as it may seem. Mobius is an enigmatic person at times and while he may seem a tad un-nuanced, he is involved in a number of interesting mainstream Jewish projects which he'd love to get more support for. Also as a newly minted citizen and resident of Israel, he does benefit from the safety and security provided for by the same IDF troops he's uh... critical of.
My issue with Mobius is simply one where he does not convey the subtleties of the positions he seems to advocate. Not only that, but he leaves an impression whereby one would think he believes on thing when in fact, he believes something somewhat different.
For example, he points folks to a discussion on Jewschool about Israel and apartheid. One would think that mobius supports the notion that Israel is an apartheid state. He doesn't. He believes that there are aspects of Israeli society that are reminiscent of apartheid. But of course the same can be said about many otherwise Democratic Western Liberal countries. I am certain, if pressed, Mobius would admit that Israel is not in fact a racist apartheid regime. But by implying that it is in a forum such as this, it is understandable that some, like The Middle, might see it as pandering. In any case, it is certainly innaccurate - Israel is not a racist apartheid society and saying that it is only serves to diminish the true legacy of racist apartheid South Africa.
Similarly in this comment thread, Mobius points to his discussion regarding the tragic death of Rachel Corrie. Israel's detractors will have you believe that she was systematically murdered by the IDF. If the IDF had a policy of murdering ISM volunteers in the West Bank, there would certainly be a lot more dead people. Granted, celebrating or making fun of her death is idiotic and crass. But again, I am certain that Mobius would admit that Rachel Corrie's death was a tragic and unfortunate accident and that most Israelis feel the same way.
Finally, there is the notion that Israel mettes out collective punishment when it demolishes homes for security purposes and as such, commits war crimes. When one thinks of war crimes one can't help but think of Nazi war criminals. In fact, the 4th Geneva Convention was instituted in large measure as a response to the horrible acts committed by Nazis against innocent civilians during WWII. When one says that Israel is committing war crimes, one can't help but liken Israeli actions to those of the Nazis. This imagery sits well with those adamantly opposed to Israel who claim that israel is engaged in genocide against the Palestinians. However, again, it is a gross distortion of both reality and International law.
The legal issues relating to the scope and applicability of the 4th Geneva Convention are extensive and not always so clear cut. Anyone who has studied International law ought to know that. When someone makes a smug, self-assured statement like "that sir, is a war crime" without preceding it with some kind of analysis, is not really making a statement with any authority or credibility.
Article 33 of the 4th Geneva convention specifically forbids collective punishment. However, as noted in Wikipedia:
By collective punishment, the drafters of the Geneva Conventions had in mind the reprisal killings of World Wars I and II. In the First World War, Germans executed Belgian villagers in mass retribution for resistance activity. In World War II, Nazis carried out a form of collective punishment to suppress resistance. Entire villages or towns or districts were held responsible for any resistance activity that took place there. The conventions, to counter this, reiterated the principle of individual responsibility. The International Committee of the Red Cross (ICRC) Commentary to the conventions states that parties to a conflict often would resort to "intimidatory measures to terrorize the population" in hopes of preventing hostile acts, but such practices "strike at guilty and innocent alike. They are opposed to all principles based on humanity and justice."
Did the drafters of the Geneva convention have in mind collective expropriation of property done in order to accomplish a percieved security need? I personally don't think so. Thus while the demolitions in question are clearly unfortunate, arguably even illegal, it would be pretty ignorant and sensationalistic to call them a war crime.
Likening Israelis to Nazis really only serves to diminish the horror of Nazi crimes. Not only that, but if one is truly interested in ending the conflict, distorting the facts on the ground contributes nothing to productive dialog.
And please, for chrissakes, do not liken me to right-wing nutters because I prefer to deal with facts in a dispassionate manner. I'd like nothing more than to live in peace with all my neighbours (like mobius, I live in Israel).
ck |
Homepage |
01.18.06 - 3:38 pm | #
I'm telling you, General, the day, nay --- the SECOND that they come out with an oral spermacide for MEN --- I am SOOOOOOOOOOO going on a serious road trip, and hitting every single beer keg in my path to this waste-of-jism's cave/rock-from-under-which-it-crawled.
Annti, Can I be of assistance?
Annti,
Please stop spreading lies, General. Only anti-semitic, anti-Zionist people make such tasteless remarks, so surely our Hebrew allies would never write something that awful. Someone should call the Anti-Defamation League and report the anti-semitic smearing of these fine, upright defenders of Israel, who are taking care of our Christian Holy Land until the Rapture comes and the Lord vaporizes those perfidious Jews right out of existence.
Adam, are you maybe freebasing and drinking whiskey?
Mon General
Generaly I wouldn't "whore" myself around but PLEASE vote for me at 
Sir,
Hey, don't forget other great Pancake Corrie jokes.
Annti: I'm in.
Mobius, you're hilarious. You come here begging for votes, and then to show that you're a "good" guy Jew, you talk about Israeli war crimes and collective punishment when you know that many homes in the area under discussion were used for tunneling and arms smuggling. 
Ooh The Middle! Harsh-O-Ramma! But let's ignore the pandering for votes for a moment, undignified as it may seem. Mobius is an enigmatic person at times and while he may seem a tad un-nuanced, he is involved in a number of interesting mainstream Jewish projects which he'd love to get more support for. Also as a newly minted citizen and resident of Israel, he does benefit from the safety and security provided for by the same IDF troops he's uh... critical of.
