"If you want to squawk your foolish political agenda, go get a My Space website. I doubt you'd have many friends. Loser."
You should really look into that Myspace idea.
freaktown |
11.02.06 - 1:48 am | #
Mission accomplished, sir. Amazon has been properly updated. Now may I put my codpiece back on and stroll the flight deck for a while?
lostinaustin |
11.02.06 - 1:49 am | #
Don't feel bad General, most of my Amazon reviews have been deleted too. I even got a visit from Fox News' security over the one I wrote about "Culture Warrior". I guess they didn't like that I kept getting the name wrong and calling it "Vulture Warrior". I mean, it's about a guy who picks the corpses of the straw men he has so bravely slain.
God bless Bill O'rally - Vulture Warrior.
Col. Vyvyan |
11.02.06 - 2:00 am | #
Sir!
This review was still up accessing it from the wilds of Austria, and I was proud to be able to click on the helpfulness 'yes' button, so take that, Lynne...
And yarrhh, I live outside the remarkable US, so I often can't do what you would like. But Amazon... oh it is so much FUN to click on that 'yes'.
I feel so good when I do that---like I'm doing something that matters, you know??
Sheesh...
Corporal Rainer |
11.02.06 - 4:14 am | #
"The art of war is the art of preserving one's freedom of action."
Maréchal Foch |
11.02.06 - 4:15 am | #
I'm sad Lynne didn't mention her dad's outstanding work in building up the 51st state - Iraq. Late autumn is a beautiful time of year to visit. (The kidnappings, death squads and car bombings of wedding parties aside of course.) I for one can't wait for Lonley Plant's Anbar Province to come out. So much to see and do!
Col. Klink |
11.02.06 - 4:25 am | #
Lonely Planet - Jesus H. Lord!
Col. Klink |
11.02.06 - 4:26 am | #
Sir,
I have it on good authority that Immanuel Kant was a real pissant, and very rarely stable.
I'm not sayin', but I'm sayin', if you know what I mean and I think you do.
melior |
11.02.06 - 4:42 am | #
General, Sir!
Those fiendish Lieberals! Will they stop at nothing to prevent the good work of the most blessed agents of the Holy American Dominion? I have bravely risked RSI and run the gauntlet of the blue screen of Death (an invention of Demoslamunists, I'm sure, for they are the Party of Death, and blue is their color). I have clicked yes on my computer "iraq" here. In an act of supreme strategic cunning I will try to do so again from my other computer "afghanistan", so long as it doesn't crash. It's better than "iraq", though, that crashes every a few minutes.
Private Partts |
11.02.06 - 4:59 am | #
General Sir!!
Mission Accomplished (just as it should be in the GC³R)!! The 'yes' button has seen action, Sir! I am so proud to have supported your review, and know in my heart of hearts that I am not worthy of submitting comments under your review.
But I did anyway.
jcricket |
11.02.06 - 5:23 am | #
very interesting site.
My name is Mark Johnson, and I've been visiting Jesus' General for last six months.
I’m a recent UC Berkeley Political science grad and I along with some fellow Princeton alums have been working hard to launch our own internet startup called Rizzleweb.com.
Rizzleweb is basically an online political community where people can log on and write performance reviewscomments for congressmen, senators, the president, and various other local and state officials across the country. I was hoping that if it would not be too much trouble you could place a link of our site on your blog. If this is not possible (which we completely understand), we still hope you will check out our site, and post some reviews.
Your contribution will encourage us to put more effort in improving our website.
Mark Johnson
www.Rizzleweb.com
markjohnson2020@hotmail.com
Mark Johnson |
Homepage |
11.02.06 - 5:35 am | #
But censorship is in the fine tradition of our Glorious Leader's vision of America. You should be honored to be censored.
I think you need to collect your finest reviews and letters and write a book. After all, s.z and scott c. did it.
A Cranny Mint |
11.02.06 - 6:48 am | #
Bretheren and Sisteren, don't forget to add tags to Sister Lynn's special book! He daughter really is such a sweet spirit.
C. Levar Christiansenson |
Homepage |
11.02.06 - 7:56 am | #
The great ones are always censored, sir. Only the blasphemous receive deserved censorship.
Oh, and fuck Kant. I never liked that bastard anyway.
The Venerable Ed |
11.02.06 - 8:16 am | #
Maréchal Foch - Thanks for that great link.
Mark Johnson - Go Bears!!!
General - I'll most gladly click that "yes" button!
Question - does anyone know under what circumstances an Amazon review would be deleted other than for gross profanity? Are we talking censorship here?
Oaktown Girl |
Homepage |
11.02.06 - 8:35 am | #
General, Sir, I think your problem at Amazon is that you show your stiletto too obviously.
You should learn from the rethuglicans, who are very careful never to display their cloven hooves, except around teenage pages who don't count.
Work on your fine Italian hand. A stiletto should be inserted so silently that the insertee doesn't realise he's been stilettoed until he's dead.
I know that you are capable of perfecting your art.
gary |
11.02.06 - 8:42 am | #
I don't know why it's subtitled "A Family Adventure Across America."
I didn't see anything in the description of the book about fear-mongering, calling people traitors, making giant piles of profits from wars, having protestors arrested, or shooting people in the face.
What family is she talking about?
Auntie Claire's Hand |
11.02.06 - 8:44 am | #
Dear Melior,
John Stuart Mill, of his own free will, On half a pint of shandy was particularly ill.
I think we have the same source? Follow the money and meet me in Lot C3 of the car park...
Col. Klink |
11.02.06 - 8:49 am | #
the thought police are at it again....
carry on
(D) |
11.02.06 - 9:35 am | #
General, Sir!
I wish to report on Kant, with your permission, sir!
Were he an American, the poor soul, he would have been a truly manly patriot. He had irreducible monads. He almost comprehended the value of truthiness and the gut, unlike that vile Frenchman Lie-binitz, an early lieberal, but was corrupted by the general Frenchness of the time and came to believe that there was some kind of truth accessible by means other than power. THAT SHOULD BE A LESSON TO US ALL! TRUST NOT THE FRENCH!!!
Private Partts |
Homepage |
11.02.06 - 9:36 am | #
General Sir,
Vat a treat! I have missed your reviews. Zey are how you 'murkans say? Spot-on!
It ees rasser inchenious of Our First Lady of Propaganda and former head of ze vile National Endowment for Humanities, Frau Doktor Cheney to attack ze vile scourge of relativism, multiculturalism, feminism and so on and sofort, vile zey are still young--and in a vay zat no Frainch vill sound sane calling it partisan. Mwahaha!
Mme. S. |
11.02.06 - 9:55 am | #
Fear not, mon general! Your reviews may have been deleted from Amazon.com's disks, but they remain graven in my heart. My cardiologist noticed them on my chest X-ray just the other day. He was looking at the image and applauding, sir, applauding!
Lynne Cheney's earliest work remains her best. I look forward to seeing the movie.
DBK |
Homepage |
11.02.06 - 10:15 am | #
General, Sir, I have not had the opportunity to read Our 50 States yet, but I notice you can buy it along with LC's other great Conservative Manifesto™, America: A Patriot's Primer.
Now, I hafta say, Mizz Lynne is right about that one. I've used that primer before, an' it's patriotic awright - it's just about as white as you can get.
A-an' what could be more patriotic than that?
Oh, and Melior 'n Col. Klink:
Rene Descartes
Was a drunken fart
He could drink you under th' table ...
Dave "I Drink Therefore I am" v. E.
Dave von Ebers |
Homepage |
11.02.06 - 10:22 am | #
Was very disappointed .
Couldn't get a rise out of this book, even after taking 3 blue pills.
If only she had written about man on dog sex. I guess I am just a hopeless romantic.
Mr. Rash Limpboy |
11.02.06 - 10:36 am | #
Oh, a-an' General, sir, don't say that you don't have a legacy ...
Are ya fergettin' about them mason jars, sir?
Don't for get about th' li'l swimmers, sir. Ev'ry one of 'em's sacred, sir. ('N if a sperm gets wasted, God gets quite irate ...)
Stock-pilin' in the Midwest,
Dave v. E.
Dave von Ebers |
Homepage |
11.02.06 - 10:37 am | #
General ... An ole' line from my past : " From Behind the Mormon Curtain " I'm writing about drilling in Utah, there's two up so far. Start with " 40 Below at Strawberry Reservoir " I'm also collecting clips of Bush at the WMD Dinner 3 so far : http://thank-you-keith-olbermann...n.blogspot.com/
colorado bob |
Homepage |
11.02.06 - 10:41 am | #
Perlman....ees zat not une nom du Juif? You know, Zhewish? Mon dieu, here we conservatives are, trying to get Palestine back into zeir hands, et zeir obviously-liberal bresseren and sisteren, putting down zeir sponges, attack an honest, manly patriot for voicing his opinion????
actor212 |
Homepage |
11.02.06 - 10:56 am | #
Oh....Heidegger, Heidegger, was a boozy beggair who could think you under a tableeeeeeeeeeeee...
actor212 |
Homepage |
11.02.06 - 10:58 am | #
David Hume could out-consume Schoppenhauer and Hegel
And Wittgenstein was a beery swine who was just as sloshed as Schlegel...
General, your reviews and the legacy they represent will live on in our hearts! Those Amazon Frenchmen don't know what kind of comeuppance they're due for!
Pope Buck I |
11.02.06 - 11:20 am | #
It seems the testy and splendiferous Ms. Perlman is in actuality: Robin Glasser, the illustrator of the book. It is so nice of Amazon to spotlight the illustrator's book review. Here is where the claim is made:
And, General, did you notice that while they deleted all but two of your review, they left the number of "yes" votes you received. Over 16,000 "helpful" votes.
On seemingly only 2 reviews!
phoebes |
Homepage |
11.02.06 - 11:49 am | #
Well it is good that the illustrator is carrying on in the finest of ethical traditions and schilling his or her own book through nom de plume reviews! Heck of a job Perly!
C. Lavar Christiansenson |
Homepage |
11.02.06 - 12:25 pm | #
General, Sir;
I musta got Amazoned this morning. I posted one of my pither epistles and it got flicked into literature's dustbin--Sigh.
What I was saying before my thread was truncated (Halosham stops a human thought) is that Lynne's book contains not of the good stuff. BTW is "Sisters" maybe, in part, based on the antics of NOTGay Mary (except when the DorkLordCheney is trolling for gay voters)?
Colonel K.:
Just in case you did not realize your error. Lynne is the DorkLordCheney's consort, not his issue. I know it's difficult to believe since Lynne looks nowhere near as undead (it's amazing what a litre of collagen, five gallons of industrial grade spackle and a couple of Vente Infantahemolattes can do for a girl)--but the tipoff is that her compact makeup thingie, just like Babs of the Beautiful Mind's, does not have a mirror.
democommie |
11.02.06 - 12:45 pm | #
General, I was also happy to tell Amazon that I found your review enormously helpful. I see that 386 people have done so already.
This book is an obvious ploy to recruit American girls to lesbianism. That girl on the book's cover with the binoculars says it all. The authors deviously substituted a basset hound for a golden retriever on the cover, but their intent is clear. I have no doubt the book is replete with drawings of horses.
cadejo4 |
Homepage |
11.02.06 - 1:06 pm | #
General Sir!
You will always have a legacy as long as I'm alive and kicking. I used to believe in the myth of the "more than 3 inches little soldier" until you exploded it for me. I will never forget that.
PS--how did ladies in the old west use sponges? To wash their cars?
Private Partz |
11.02.06 - 1:13 pm | #
did lynne mention that in pennsylvania they were able to buy $20 worth of apples for $10? what suckers in pennsylvania
x x s x 11 s |
11.02.06 - 1:47 pm | #
General! Sir!
You're hiding your light (however small it may be) under a bushel: you also commented that the splendiferator is in fact a sock puppet.
I've posted the following:
"C. Perlman, your comment on D.K. Gaul's review is signed by the illustrator of the very book under discussion. How close are you to Robin Preiss Glasser? Are you one and the same, a work colleague, or a close friend?
"Whichever the case may be, this must tarnish the glow in your review."
Anonymous |
11.02.06 - 1:50 pm | #
"History Buff", the author of the other spotlight review, only likes books by Ms. Cheney. They're both sockpuppets.
Anonymous |
11.02.06 - 2:09 pm | #
Yeah, I noticed that. I wonder if "History Buff" is Lynne.
patriotboy |
Homepage |
11.02.06 - 2:20 pm | #
General, despite our vast differences of opinion on politics and religion, I'm proud to call you a friend. I added my vote to your tally, along with 4 other people in the time it took me to do it.
Now, would you please review "Of Pandas and People?"
anne johnson |
Homepage |
11.02.06 - 2:40 pm | #
Sir:
There's nothing Nietzsche coudn't teach ya
'Bout the raising of the wrist
May I suggest that the use of tags is helpful in letting other patriots get to know Mrs. Deputy Leader's work? Some Frenchmen have already tagged the book with "lesbian" and "wives of monsters". I call on right-thinking folks everywhere to protect Ms. Cheney's honor by applying their own...
Specialist G |
11.02.06 - 3:15 pm | #
Sir General Sir:
Mayhapse Chenney could write another book in the same area as 'Sisters', and call it 'Brothers', and put all references about 'the little solider that could' in it.
Just a thought...
Samwise Galenorn |
Homepage |
11.02.06 - 3:23 pm | #
Sir,
Rep. boehner is blaming the generals for the chaos in Iraq.
We know good generals like yourself are why we are winning the decade of war that we call Iraq.
Please set him straight.(Literally?)
Just like you did Rep. Foley(Maf54).
Mr.Murder |
11.02.06 - 3:37 pm | #
Sir!
Reporting from the Sweat Coast. My inner Frenchman confirms women don't have little soldiers, but they do have little cadets that snap to attention when properly saluted. Unless they are Islamofascists.
EASYFL |
11.02.06 - 3:41 pm | #
As I suspected, the book is full of homosexual, French recruitment tactics. I cite only one example: a little girl in the book travels to the East Coast and becomes enamored of "Boston Cream Pie."
I need merely quote from a culinary history:
The Parker House Hotel (now the Omni Parker House Hotel), claims to have served Boston cream pies since their opening in 1856. French chef Sanzian, who was hired for the opening of the hotel, is credited with creating Boston cream pie.
If parents think they can safely put their children in the hands of Lynne Cheney, who failed in her own attempt to raise a heterosexual daughter, they are sadly mistaken.
cadejo4 |
Homepage |
11.02.06 - 4:06 pm | #
patriotboy | Homepage | 11.02.06 - 2:20 pm |
Perhaps "History Buff" could ask Ms. Cheney to write an introduction to the non-torture practice of waterboarding for elementary school students, illustrated by Robin Preiss Glasser?
Anonymous |
11.02.06 - 4:15 pm | #
My inner Frenchman confirms women don't have little soldiers, but they do have little cadets that snap to attention when properly saluted
Damn it. I was told it was a little sailor in a boat. No wonder I can't find it. I need better intelligence than this, people.
Gen. JC Christian, patriot |
Homepage |
11.02.06 - 4:52 pm | #
Uh, no disrespect intended to the unit, but aren't you guys a bit overboard on the sexual imagery? Why not just pull a quick combat jack and get on with the serious business of lighting up terrorists? Speaking of which, don't forget to vote . . . .
WHACKO |
11.02.06 - 4:59 pm | #
(Verse II)
John Stewart Mill of his own free will
On a half a pint of shandy was particularly ill
Plato, they say, could stick it away,
Half a crate of whisky every day
Aristotle, Aristotle
Was a bugger for the bottle
Hobbes was fond of his dram
And Rene Descartes was a drunken fart
"I drink, therefore I am".
Yes, Socrates himself is particularly missed...
A lovely little thinker but a bugger when he's pissed.
Anonymous |
11.02.06 - 5:08 pm | #
Is there anyone here called Michael Baldwin?
Anonymous |
11.02.06 - 5:11 pm | #
General, Sir;
Sir, I just wanted you to know that the indoctrizilationising is working on our military. NPR (Nasty Pansies Radio) just had a snippet about how, despite the fact that most of the MerKKKin people have, unaccountably, stopped believing the pretendsidents, Wm. Jennings Bryantesque "Cross of Smoke & Mirrors" speech that the military is still firmly behind him. Now we know who bought up a lot of that Enron stock--after it dropped. Also, I saw Penn Jillet on the confusingly (ironic?) Colbare Raypore earlier this day and he said that you have to tell the truth once in a while in order for people to keep swallowing the lies--a lot he knows! Of course he also said there is no GOD, to which Mr. Colebare replied, "You know what would be a neat trick? Conjuring up a glass of water when you're burning in HELL!!" Sir, I fantasize that you might look a bit like Mr. Colebare (albeit with larger mucscles & a bit more whupass) and that ofJoshua looks like Pam Anderson (but with mAnnie Coulters razor sharp witlessness).
Sir, btw, after that impromptu Halloween party the other night, those nice Reptilican liegislators were so 'faced that they couldn't manage the bus--so, I drove the whole lot of home (if you get my meaning, if you catch my drift). Anyways, we now have a 44 (adult) 60 (child)capacity, bright yellow, stops at all RR Crossings, Command Vehicle. It's not much for speed, Sir, but it stops traffic--knowudimean?
democommie |
11.02.06 - 5:12 pm | #
who would tag it waterboarding?
Anonymous |
11.02.06 - 5:15 pm | #
WHACKO;
I am in charge of all things vehicular in the General's coterie of card carrying cadres and I'd be the one who'd be handling requisitions and such. I don't believe I'm familiar with a 'combat jack'. Is that something that only works with utility vehicles or could we all have one on the backseat of our private vehicles? Nationally Enquiring minds want to know.
What's that Darla? He means what? WHACKO, blast you! We are in service to the General, not Onan.
democommie |
11.02.06 - 5:20 pm | #
Sir! A follow up report from the Sweat Coast My inner frenchman tells me that the women have little Naval Cadets, very comfortable in a boat, or canoe. I understand you can spot them by their little hats.
sir:
i'm confused.
is 'sock' also a sock puppet? was stephanie miller threatened by lynn cheney?
what is the colorado springs french gay prostitute evangelical scandal ed schultz is talking about today all about?
please advise...
fred c dobbs |
11.02.06 - 5:31 pm | #
I'll write about Ted Haggards love for Spartan-style wrestling tonight. Until then, check out Americablog.
Gen. JC Christian, patriot |
Homepage |
11.02.06 - 5:40 pm | #
Our good man,Don Sherwood, of forest fame, is accused of being a smart man. The latest bombshell on the Don Sherwood affair from the Associated Press:
A Republican congressman accused of abusing his ex-mistress agreed to pay her about $500,000 in a settlement last year that contained a powerful incentive for her to keep quiet until after Election Day, a person familiar with the terms of the deal told The Associated Press.
Well, it just sounds smart to me.
And here's a fine Bush Christian whose little soldier has gone astray. He's a handsome fella, in a very manly hetrosexual way, of course.
Oh, yes, it was a honor and privilege to vote for your outstanding review, but where was the video of those Sisters mud wrestling?
Mike |
11.02.06 - 5:53 pm | #
I read dat Cheney fellers book bout dem sisters an I don unerstand it. been tryin to larn it but it ain't got no pitchers. Caint larn it with no pitchers. Tell Perlman-Glasser to draw some real nice pitchers sos I can larn it.
realtime |
11.02.06 - 6:17 pm | #
Your legacy, General, is the lasting Democracy we have brought to Iraq. Or Idaho. I forget now which.
Poor Rev. Haggards...as a Reverend myself, I understand how hard it is to show my love for my fellow sinners, especially the professional ones. I didn't mean hard. Never mind.
Swing by with the command bus, Democommie, so we can perform an intervention on Merle. I've been showing him my special love, seeing his perfect G3CR intellect and all, and what do you know? He's abandoned his Blog! I think he believes I'm not a real Reverend! I am hurt and confused, and demand my revenge.
Should we enlist the Squadristi, or simply the electric communion wafers?
So many to stone, so little time;
the Rev Jerry Gloryhole |
11.02.06 - 6:55 pm | #
I am sorry to see even the mention of the apostate, Stephanie Miller, in the General's sanctuary, especially on a thread he has sanctified with his very presence, err, comment. As everyone already knows, her father, God bless him, was Sen. Barry Goldwater's Veep candidate against the French LBJ. She has disgraced her family, her religion, and most importantly, her inherent white supremacy.
Also, my inner Frenchman just loves her, so it's very distracting when I am trying to soak up all the knowledge and virtue resplendent on these threads.
Ghost of Adolph Rupp |
11.02.06 - 6:57 pm | #
Ah, JG, your legacy shall always live on in the blogosphere.
Batocchio |
Homepage |
11.02.06 - 10:22 pm | #
Hey - her book is tagged: evil, evildoer, evil woman. Who could ever be so unkind??!
:-P
Raging Gurrl |
Homepage |
11.02.06 - 10:47 pm | #
Reverend Jerry:
I think that Mme. Stinkeye's Squadistri have not squandered their blood and fortune to the extent that they can't show a little love to Merle. Electric eucharist sounds like a great idea--would that be like a fizzy or something of higher voltage.
Rev Jerry,
email us with your preferences and I'll trot round the corner to the Underground Seattle Tour center and snag you a bunch of shiny brochures and mail it off to ya!
Hey Rash Limpboy! Check out my hometown! luckily, after what happened to that poor horsie in Eatonville last year, we have laws against this!
As long as they're not having sex with children; oh, wait, his party affiliation was not noted in the article--my bad.
democommie |
11.03.06 - 5:51 am | #
Sir!
I believe we have an infiltrator in our rank legion! Actor212 speaks real funny.
Private Partts |
Homepage |
11.03.06 - 9:13 am | #
Reporting from the Sweat Coast. My inner Frenchman confirms women don't have little soldiers, but they do have little cadets that snap to attention when properly saluted. Unless they are Islamofascists.
EASYFL | 11.02.06 - 3:41 pm |
Sir,
I'm really confused. Women have little cadets? They must be very shy and undisicplined. They need to be saluted repeatedly.
As for Madam Che, and her literary prowess, I believe Amazon owes you, Sir, an apology.....in writing.
Rev. Haggards is an infidel. I know that's very strong language, but, damnit all, how could he let down the GC³R so close to the election. I hope he's on his knees. No, wait, that's what got him into trouble. He'd better just pray standing up.
Jackie_O |
11.03.06 - 10:10 am | #
general, sir:
now this guy in colorodo springs is accusing the rev of being a socksucker...a socksucker who didn't use a con-dumb.
is this the lowest, or can it get worse?
yes, he bought the meth but he didn't use it...
yes, he bought the massage, but he didn't use it...
why can't jeff gannon get to the bottom of this?
please advise
fred c dobbs |
11.03.06 - 3:54 pm | #
Fred;
Jeff can get to the bottom, he is the bottom.
democommie |
11.03.06 - 4:58 pm | #
Sir!
If Frenchmen have deleted your reviews on Amazon, can you not counfound 'em by posting them here? Your fans^H^H^H^H soldiers (not the "little" ones!) would surely appreciate it!
Amit Joshi |
11.03.06 - 6:52 pm | #
Monsiuer! Je suis been here longair zen you have, you feelthy underground rayseestance faitair! J'aime le Vichy Fran..Ah mean America!
actor212 |
Homepage |
11.04.06 - 6:27 pm | #
wonder what on earth possessed Glasser/Perlman to use that horrid homeosectual reinbow flag on her cover? I'm sure Lynn didn't notice that!
NOTeasy |
Homepage |
11.05.06 - 11:22 am | #
Amazon has deleted tags, comments and reviews. Including the General's, again.
Anonymous |
11.06.06 - 3:28 pm | #
The deletions at Amazon are frightening in their out-in-the-open blasphemy. Might I suggest a smiting upon them in some form? A plague of frogs would be poetic justice.
LanceThruster |
11.07.06 - 5:24 pm | #
You may not have a legacy, General, but apparently you have a reputation! Well done!
cinnamondog |
11.08.06 - 9:13 pm | #