Sir! Are you now on his chain-mail-forwarding list, sir?

"Dear Fox News colleague: Microsoft is testing a new product, and we'll all get $1,000 if we forward this enough times."

CJ
Catholic Jackson | 01.19.07 - 3:36 pm | #

it was fun to watch dinesh on the colbert report. i only hope colbert is lucky enought to also get the honeruble hargrove to clarify how in a post 9-11 world we need to get over our personal hangups, so that we can have a united country to fight the evil empire of a post 9-11 world
john henry | 01.19.07 - 3:50 pm | #

The right wing is cracking up. Between D'Souza's embracing the religious extremism of the Taliban and Fox New's "discussion" about whether Barack Obama was educated in a Wahhabist madrassa ... back when he was all of six years old ... they've finally gone off the deep end!
Dave von Ebers | Homepage | 01.19.07 - 4:05 pm | #

General, sir!
How does OfJoshua deal with your rapier wit every day? I am jealous.
lowly grunt | Homepage | 01.19.07 - 4:48 pm | #

At the very least, Comrad D'Souza should know that, having that carpet, he is vulnerable to terrorist attack at any moment.
.
Grand Moff Texan | Homepage | 01.19.07 - 4:58 pm | #

I thought brown people from his country were supposed to be smart.
cplklyde | 01.19.07 - 6:15 pm | #

General, Sir!

If emails are complicating your discussions, perhaps you should try D'Souzaphone.

Thanks folks, I'll be here all week. Don't forget to tip your waitress (and leave those cows alone).

~
ifthethunderdontgetya³² | Homepage | 01.19.07 - 6:31 pm | #

"Part of my measurement for success is, have I effectively and amusingly and persuasively repelled the javelins that are being hurled at me?"
-Dinesh D'Souza

I'd say D'Souza is lying prone on his leopard skin carpet with a javelin sticking out of him right about now.
100% pure beef | 01.19.07 - 6:58 pm | #

He replied again, asking me if I was on drugs. I'll post a response later.
patriotboy | Homepage | 01.19.07 - 7:04 pm | #

Most Honorable General,

Please allow me to introduce myself. My name is Abu Mtn Dew and I am a representative of the Pepsi Jihad (carbonation be praised) and I though I would commend you on your acknowledgement of our shared goals and that yes indeed the Cultural left is responsible for everything bad.

Humbly yours,
Abu Mtn Dew
Abu Mtn Dew | Homepage | 01.19.07 - 7:43 pm | #

hhmmmmnnnnn....a crackpot? could there be a hidden meaning here somewhere?
rkrider | 01.19.07 - 7:46 pm | #

Someone with leopard skin carpet asking YOU if YOU'RE on drugs? I figured D'Souza was French.
Poika | 01.19.07 - 7:48 pm | #

Go get 'em, General.

In honor of your valiant leadership, I am officially changing my name to 'Ofnoonebutnotbecauseimgayjustwaitingfor godtochooseforme'.



(all snarkiness aside, I love your blog...keep up the good work)
Sharktattoo | 01.19.07 - 7:49 pm | #

Dinesh D'Douchebag is a delusional dipshit.

That is all.
Terry C, Pelosi Fan | Homepage | 01.19.07 - 7:49 pm | #

I see you have hit the lad in a tender spot. A leopard print carpet is not becoming of a moral scold and he knows it. Carpetgate!
zudz | Homepage | 01.19.07 - 7:50 pm | #

Jesus H. Christ, that's fucking hilarious.
jac | 01.19.07 - 7:56 pm | #

Mr. D'Souza seems to be trying that passive-aggressive approach, to respond to you while seeming to not respond to you.

Or, he's clueless.

It's one of the two.
Cautious Man | Homepage | 01.19.07 - 8:07 pm | #

For a guy who prides himself on being clever, that's a pretty cliched response.
ealot | 01.19.07 - 8:13 pm | #

General, Sir!

Might I suggest the response, "I used to be all strung out on drugs...Now I'm all strung out on the Lord".

~
ifthethunderdontgetya | Homepage | 01.19.07 - 8:15 pm | #

He uses AOL?
NTodd, Vickyssoise | Homepage | 01.19.07 - 8:23 pm | #

Money blurb for the leopard-print cover paperback edition: "His book is a national disgrace."- New York Times.

High five!
zudz | Homepage | 01.19.07 - 8:24 pm | #

...have I effectively and amusingly and persuasively repelled the javelins that are being hurled at me?"

General Sir,

How does one amusingly repel a javelin? Is it due to some kind of laughter force field [note to self, is this the reason the French respond so to Jerry Lewis?]? Should we be working on this so the Islamofasicsts don't come up with it first? Because if they can amusingly repel our javelin now, they might be able to joke their way out of our missile's wrath next.
Jay B. | Homepage | 01.19.07 - 8:26 pm | #

He uses AOL?
NTodd, Vickyssoise | Homepage | 01.19.07 - 8:23 pm

Well duh, NTodd. He's an idiot in Disneyland, after all.

Lay off the fried foods, ok!
NTodd's pants | 01.19.07 - 8:28 pm | #

General! Sir!

With your postscript, sir, you have made me think you are just a tease, sir!

Respectfully,
Sporty | Homepage | 01.19.07 - 9:00 pm | #

AOL chat rooms are the best for sexual predators.
a/s/l *69 | 01.19.07 - 9:11 pm | #

At least he didn't show the reporter his pink satin panty collection. He had the good sense to know that might have made him look like a crackpot. I mean, he already is a crockpot
purvis ames | 01.19.07 - 9:16 pm | #

I agree with Poika. Having a leopard print carpet is definitely very, very French. Proceed with this email ping-pong carefully, sir.
itwasntme | 01.19.07 - 9:27 pm | #

With the General's permission, the design may not be the most important thing.

In French sir - "tapis" = carpet.

"Tapette" = something akin to "Greco-Roman combatant"

If you have any photographs that show carpet fibers protruding from Mr. D'Souza's teeth, you know what to expect.
cecrops | 01.19.07 - 9:41 pm | #

General Sir! Excellent! You are taking page right out of Reagan's ( All Praise and Blessing Upon His Name) book. He attacked a country with little or no standing defence (Gernada) and you attacked D'Souza, who has little or no humor or intelligence.

Masterful once again. President Reagan ( May Jesus Bestow Waffles and Beer Unton Him), would be proud!
Galactic Dustbin | Homepage | 01.19.07 - 9:51 pm | #

Jay B.:

Darla has amusingly repelled my javelin more times than I care to think about (and she actually uses a little term of endearment for my manly weapon; she calls it my "butter" knife).

General, Sir:

You need to be careful of very irritating people like Mr. Dinesh, Sir. He will be crushing you like a bug, Sir.

Catholic Jackson:

It's been too long since I've seen one or your missives. Are you by any chance dropping in because of Dinesh's ties to the "Black Pope"? He was educated by the Jebbies as a child and you know the Manchurian Candidate's brainwashers would get woodshedded by the Society's varsity.
When it comes to molding young minds and, well, other parts of their bodies, the Church of Rome is truly non pareil.
democommie™™™™®© | 01.19.07 - 9:53 pm | #

*sniff*

New money. How crass.
Avedon | Homepage | 01.19.07 - 10:06 pm | #

General, Sir:

May I suggest, when trying to contact this fellow, next time try using the D'Souzaphone.
Luther | 01.19.07 - 10:09 pm | #

I'm glad Mr. D'Souza assumed the crackpot was not you, sir.

Btw, some crackpot at the Koufax Awards is attempting to circumvent the new "no repeat" rule by nominating you for a 3rd consecutive humiliation and using Michelle Maglalang's website. Just thought you'd like to know.
L.G. Fucktard | 01.19.07 - 10:16 pm | #

Oh, the humanity!

There is much more disturbing news on Wikipedia about Mr. Dinesh D'Souza. I was pretty sure that with a name like D'Souza that he would be French. Well, he's not. He's not even white. He's brown.

The article also reported that Mr. D'Souza dated conservative author Ann Coulter and conservative radio host Laura Ingraham, to whom he was engaged but never married.

I ask you do we really want a brown person with miscegenation in his heart to advise us on what rugs to place on our floors? what has he done to our beloved, blonde, Republican spokeswomen folk?
Gov. Fahr-Wright | 01.19.07 - 10:28 pm | #

General Sir!!

I must wonder: Did D'Souza buy his leopard print carpet from the same drag queen in Toronto (e-Bay seller) that I bought my full length leopard coat from?

Just wondering.
jcricket | 01.19.07 - 11:25 pm | #

Saying "Dinesh D'Souza" out loud makes me feel like I'm on drugs, or drunk, or a plant groper with a whiffle wang for a piddle whomper. By Jove, that's it! Saying his name out loud makes me feel like I'm a drunk druggie trying to hump a rhododendron--with a hole-riddled johnny made of plastic to boot! Okay, what do I win?

+++
mjs | Homepage | 01.19.07 - 11:28 pm | #

so, the thing is... I work for a high end interior designer. We have many clients who have houses in that part of the world (though it is charming and quaint that is seems to be his actual home, rather than a second/third/fourth home). In the context of the place, you must understand:

Leopard (and other exotic animal prints) are the local equivalent of plaid.

That said, he's still an asshole.
siobhan | 01.19.07 - 11:57 pm | #

Oh, and credit where credit is due: They like the look of animal, but they prefer prints and don't actually want to go trophy hunting to get one.

I'd like to think it's because they've progressed slightly, but it's probably because there's not a suitable Four Seasons near the hunting grounds - certainly not one that will gut, skin and tan their cat.
siobhan | 01.20.07 - 12:01 am | #

According to Wikipedia "As writer and editor-in-chief for Prospect, the organization's magazine, D'Souza wrote a March 1984 cover story identifying a Freshman undergraduate who had begun a sexual relationship with another student against her mother's wishes. D'Souza offered details of the woman's sex life.

Mr. D'Souza is a conservative hero for publishing details of someone's sex life because they dated someone the mother did not approve of. This country could use more D'Souzas to hold McCarthy hearings on the sex life of the citizenry.

I was unaware that a Brahman could date someone in the transgendered caste.
realtime | 01.20.07 - 12:02 am | #

From: a.scott
To: dineshjdsouza@aol.com

Sent:XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX 12:06 AM
Subject: Re: Disappointed fan

Some crackpot is writing political books and using your name and picture. Just thought you'd like to know.

best,A.Scott
A.Scott | Homepage | 01.20.07 - 12:12 am | #

Jesus. I bought a plaid coat? Who knew????????????
jcricket | 01.20.07 - 12:40 am | #

^^ haha
::mwah:: | 01.20.07 - 12:40 am | #

john henry mentioned Dinesh's(is he a descendent of Ganesh, the elephant-headed Hindu deity?) apperance on Colbert. Here's the link for those of you who may enjoy this sort of thing:

http://movies.crooksandliars.com...bert- DSouza.mov
SeattleTammy | Homepage | 01.20.07 - 12:44 am | #

From: purvis ames
To: dineshjdsouza
Re: rug

Some "realtor" is showing a house which she claims to be yours in a gated community right outside of San Diego. The entire house has wall-to-wall beagle skin carpetting. I'm sure she is an imposter and I just thought you'd like to know so that you can contact your local private police force.

Purvis Ames
purvis ames | 01.20.07 - 1:24 am | #

Was I was wrong about you? I assumed that you were responsible for choosing the leopard print carpet in your den. Now, I'm wondering if the carpet was laid without your knowledge…
-- patriotboy

Sir, if D'Souza came home to find his den had been decked-out like a pimpmobile, and he did not set fire to it, he is - as you said - a man with a "twisted need to engage in all manner of unspeakable acts of perversion".

If, on the other hand, D'Souza's tasseled loafers trample Melanistic Leopard, he's a modern-day J. Edgar Hoover.
L.G. Fucktard | 01.20.07 - 1:41 am | #

Oh Jeez-this is one of the funniest things I've ever read. Talk about simple proof of what idjiots these people are.

Meanwhile, didn't that evil Jewboy commie Bob Dylan write something about brand new leopard skin thingees? Hats or carpets or something like that? I can't recall, oddly.

My age, it shows up in mysterious ways, memories, yet inabilities to learn enough html to link to you tube. One of you young'uns will have to do that.
Geoff | 01.20.07 - 2:46 am | #

And then I go and read the comments above-and what do I learn? Somebody claims that he was engaged to Laura Ingraham-and she evidently called the whole thing off, figuring he wasn't fit enough to be the father of her children? Yikes-it's not like these neo-cons can be that selective.
Geoff | 01.20.07 - 2:54 am | #

Geoff: You're thinking of the Dylan song "Leopard-skin Pillbox Hat." In my mind I like to remember it as an homage of sorts to Jackie Kennedy. Although I don't think Jackie would ever have worn leopard print. Or plaid.
`
MzNicky | 01.20.07 - 1:42 pm | #

General Sir!
May I also suggest some things zat may go nice wiss DD's rug? I think pairhaps some Jugendstil knicknacks, a copy of Women's Wear Daily, some girly-style martinis, lots of heavy pancake makeup, a 1930s cigarette holder bought in Shanghai and a nice plastic surgeon. Ja, vill do! DD doesn't have to smoke. Just hold ze cigarette holder and look fabulous ees al zat's required.
Mme. S. | 01.23.07 - 1:39 pm | #