Looking at the parent's side: I would have requested my student to be transferred to another class when I noticed this was an issue. But considering how late it is in the school year, I would probably keep my student in the class, and let him finish out in the class he started with. I would schedule an appointment with the principal to discuss the teacher's performance over the year. I would stress that I am not an angry parent, and I don't want the teacher to be punished, but I am concerned. I would explain the situation to the principal: how it seems the teacher had little control of the class this year, your child was not challenged academically due to the misbehavior, and your child was often punished for the majority's behavior. Because I am a teacher, I would suggest the principal look into ways he/she can help the teachers in this area. The teacher sounds like she has received little support and was in over her head this year. The principal has means to help her.
As a teacher: I would be mortified to learn that a parent went to my principal regarding my management skills. If the principal thought you were an angry parent, the he/she might have handled the situation in a less than gentle manner. As a 30 year veteran, I would not want my principal to know that I was having trouble manageing my class. But if I was a responsible teacher, I would realize that I was in over my head and would ultimately appreciate the help.
This is a tough situation, because I can see both sides. But the most important issue here is that your child did not receive the best education this year, because his teacher was ill-equipped for whatever reason. Certainly all children doctor stories or stretch the truth to suit thier own needs, but if the teacher did in fact yell at your child because you spoke with the principal, this needs to be addressed. Yelling at children is not acceptable.
Good luck with this!
I could not imagine how much more frustrating this must be for you being both the parent AND a teacher.
This sounds horrible but I would say to just let things lie until the end of the year. Realistically we both know that nothing is going to change no matter what you say at this point. Even if this was the most incompetent teachers around, it is generally a two year process to get rid of a teacher but in the mean time, they have the power to make your child misserable.
I would kind of turn this around as a teachable moment for you child. Throughout life everybody is confronted with horrible people that are not very good at their jobs. Unfair things will always happen to us but the only thing that we have control over is how we react and handle these situations.
The way I look at it is that it is pretty inevitable that everybody will run into at least one bad teacher in their academic lives (I am actually dealing with one right now in one of my Masters classes!). We do make it through it and it will always make us appreciate when a good one comes along.
That being said, you definitely should make all of your views made clear to both the principal and the teacher once the school year is over. It really is your obligation to the furture students of that teacher that the facts do come out.
Good luck...
It's probably unlikely you'd get your child moved to another class at this point in the game, unless you were willing to make a huge stink about it.
Now, would it be worthwhile to make that stink? Maybe. Your child reports that his teacher yelled at him because you did your job as a parent and spoke up for him. That is something the principal need to know about. I can certainly understand why your son wouldn't want you to say anything, but he needs to know that 1) his teacher has acted inappropriately, and there are consequences for that, and 2) you are his greatest advocate.
As an administrator, I don't like getting calls like the one you would need to make in order to address this issue, but I appreciate it when parents give me the information I need in order to bring about change when it has to happen, and it needs to happen here. I suspect you are not the first parent to make such a call regarding this teacher.
Good luck, and I'm interested to see how it all works out.
I was in your situation two years ago when my child was in second grade. No challenging work, other students misbehaving, my child was miserable. Child crying at the prospect of going to school, and being cranky at home.
My suggestion is to get your child out of that classroom.
Call the principal, relate what you wrote here. Let your child spent the remaining weeks of the school year in a safe environment. If the school is difficult and won't move him, keep him with you or your wife.
The teacher has already demonstrated that she will retaliate against your child if you complain to the principal. Don't give her another chance to do that.
Also, check out hoagiesgifted.org There is a lot of info there for parents and teachers of gifted kids. Also check out some of the gifted listserves...There is a supportive community out there.
I was outraged to read this post. That the teacher would retaliate against your child is unacceptable. In response to the post by Strange New Teacher, I think the principal does need to know when a teacher has a chronic lack of control so he or she can take steps to make the situation better. Administrators should be in teachers' classrooms often enough that they would know a problem like this exists before the parents even start calling. Polski3, I think you were well within your right to call the principal in this case.
On another note, thank you for the information on Cornell Note-taking. I downloaded a powerpoint training on it and I think I might use it next year.
I would go over the teacher's head the last day of the year once they cannot punish your child. No way they should be able to punish the kid because they got called on the carpet for their lack of management skills.
You need admin to intercede for you and get your kid out of that classroom. No kid deserves what your son received from that "experienced" teacher. Good luck.
I generally tend toward a passive nature, however, this issue is something you need to think about long term- this teacher will have many more chances to do this to another child. Advocate for your child, but also the others she'll teach and touch as well. Likewise, think about the long term message sent to your son and the others in the class. I'm making an assumption that the teacher probably said something in front of the class, because that would tend to follow the pattern of behavior you've described.
I am a teacher as well, so I do feel empathy for your son's teacher- but there is never a reason to embarass a child. I would suggest you meet with the teacher and principal, explaining the situation. You don't have to disclose that your son shared this with you, say another student in the class provided the information. Make it plain to both that this sort of behavior is not acceptable. You don't have to make this seem threatening, simply matter of fact calmness says more than most people realize.
This isn't an easy situation, you have my sympathies- please let us know how it turns out.
One more thing.....when you are talking to a parent of one YOUR students and they seem to have their back up for no good reason, remember that they may have dealt with a teacher like this in the past.
Once you have tried to deal with a bad situation for your child, had to go to the principal, and still did not have a good resolution, it is hard to go into the next school years with the same level of trust that the system will work.
Strange new teacher....why shouldn't Polski3 be an angry parent? His child should be able to learn at school in an orderly environment. It doesn't seem like his child had that opportunity this year.
I agree with some comments and disagree with others. I know from where I speak, I've taught gifted kids for 25 years and parented 4 gifted sons for 32 years. Let me digress--An MIT professor, Randy Pausch, dying of cancer was interviewed on 60 Minutes. When his wife was asked if she was angry about her husband's illness she said, "It is what it is."
I feel that way about the sad situation your son is in, it is too late in the year to make a change. Keep the communication open with him and explain that what the teacher did was wrong. I would only go to the teacher (again)or principal (again)if you think you can help--the teacher obviously knows she's had a hell of a year. Next year will be better for your son. My two cents, N.
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