There's a party in the cupboard
having just spent approximately 40 hours over the past four days in technically social situations (including a 12hr birthday party, which is unusual, but still) and realizing that despite all historical evidence to the contrary that i'm actually social now (as distinguished from outgoing), i'd say the thing that helped with passivity was:
public speaking.
no, seriously. for about a six-month period i was really good at it. before i had to take public speaking as a class, which i had to do for two years, i had crippling stage fright. i still do, but i can mask it. by the end i actually looked forward to speaking in front of people, because it combined writing with applause. like a lot of people who write, i think, i combine antisocial tendencies with no small desire for attention; public speaking scratches that itch because it's not *actually* a social situation--the pacing is predetermined, it's (mostly) one-directional, and it's not spontaneous. sports: also good for that (performance in front of an audience w/o actual interaction). drama's probably good too, for the same reasons, but i don't know from it.
i am somewhat ashamed to admit that i saw a toastmasters flyer in the oak park library and was intrigued. sadly, further research showed that it's more about running meetings than reading carefully honed cultural analysis. dammit.
having just spent approximately 40 hours over the past four days in technically social situations (including a 12hr birthday party, which is unusual, but still) and realizing that despite all historical evidence to the contrary that i'm actually social now (as distinguished from outgoing), i'd say the thing that helped with passivity was:
public speaking.
no, seriously. for about a six-month period i was really good at it. before i had to take public speaking as a class, which i had to do for two years, i had crippling stage fright. i still do, but i can mask it. by the end i actually looked forward to speaking in front of people, because it combined writing with applause. like a lot of people who write, i think, i combine antisocial tendencies with no small desire for attention; public speaking scratches that itch because it's not *actually* a social situation--the pacing is predetermined, it's (mostly) one-directional, and it's not spontaneous. sports: also good for that (performance in front of an audience w/o actual interaction). drama's probably good too, for the same reasons, but i don't know from it.
i am somewhat ashamed to admit that i saw a toastmasters flyer in the oak park library and was intrigued. sadly, further research showed that it's more about running meetings than reading carefully honed cultural analysis. dammit.
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