My best friend’s two year old niece was being video-taped 'cause it’s Christmas, and you video cute two year olds. Well - the entire family got an object lesson on why they all have to begin watching their language – little pitchers do indeed have big ears. Miss Lilah was playing with her toy kitchen, pretended to spill something and said, 'Aw, Fuck!' And they have it on tape for posterity. My friend said everyone fell over laughing. Now comes the problem of trying to get her to un-learn that word. Her papa tends to swear a lot (kinda like Darren McGavin in A Christmas Story). The next couple of years are gonna be loads of fun!
Wait, we're not supposed to teach them that language? Well, damn!! There goes my raison d'etre as Aunt Kelley. That and clearing out their little heads of all the godbag nonsense their parents inflict upon them. I had to sit through two of my nephews' baptism on Christmas eve. I almost called "bullshit" out loud when the minister mentioned that christ, as the son of god, had been around since the creation of earth "thousands of years ago", and again during the baptism when the same moron baptised a husband before the wife, stating that "as head of the household" he should go first. I almost jumped in to drown him.
What's an aunt to do???
My kid yelled fuck only she meant 'fork' (she's a baby)which was pretty hysterical...
Ah, yes. The fork/fuck duality. Do you have her on tape? Because that could be excellent to have when she's older.
One of my toddler Montessori charges, years ago, politely informed me at lunch one day that he needed a "fuckin spoon." He was asking for a fork and spoon, but it took me a stunned minute to realize it.
As a godly nation, we should all work together to get forks renamed.
Commenting by HaloScan
