This has been linked to my Thorn Tree site for over a month! None of my three readers have seen it. Please, Oh Please, won't someone visit my website!! If I had any traffic, by now I'd have known I'd been punk'd!
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The Thorn Tree Manifesto
by Robert
Alright, I admit it. I'm a frustrated wanna-be revolutionary.
Between stints at my job at Burger King working the drive-thru window, I nestle in front of my Atari video game console which I modified to blog on. And I try to play at being a silly little commie.
Yeah, flipping burgers is a tough way to make a buck. It has served (no pun intended) to anger me against the capitalist class that hurls insults at me from my station in life behind the drive-thru window. Still, I'm pretty good at being a burger jockey. Check out my skills: "Sir, would you like some fries with that Whopper?"
Yes, I know -- I'm mad at the world, but you can help mellow out my anger, in the same way that cheese on a Whopper makes it taste better. Here's how:
When you go to Burger King, be polite to me when ordering. If I get your order wrong, don't scream at me and say something like, "WHAT THE F*CK?--I DIDN"T ORDER A VANILLA SHAKE!!!" Instead, address me in a kind soothing voice, something like this: "Excuse me Robert, I don't mean to bother you, but I did not order a vanilla shake. Would it be possible for you to get me the large Coke I actually ordered after you're done checking your zipper and the angle of your paper Burger King hat?
You get the point. Be nice to me and your Burger King order will be filled promptly and correctly. And if enough of you treat me with respect when I'm elbow-deep in french fry grease, I might even close my blog and take up collecting Scooby-Doo lunchboxes instead--something I've always yearned to do.
Be nice to me. Help me get there. And men, please stop driving up and exposing your genitals to me at the drive-thru window.
Commenting by HaloScan
