You talkin' to me?
When my wife was pregnant for our first I came home one day and found her bawling her eyes out.
I asked her if she was sad, she said no.
I asked her if she was in pain, she said no.
So what's the matter I asked.
"I'm happy."
What ???
I just found out I was pregnant this weekend. Way to ease my mind about the whole labor thing. :0
Great site..... could we have more adverts please
Hey, January 1983. It sounds like... zillions of years ago, I barely remember anything from those years. Nobody should be messing around that long ago, just... mumbling sounds that were anything but words and crying to get food, like I did.
@Oldguy: I'm not so old but, I've discovered that women don't need a reason to cry. Or better said, they just cry, regardless there's any backgrounded reason to do it.
As for the rest, I'm not planning to have kids in a close future, so can't say much about this. Life is kinda different for me than it is for the vast majority of people so... I guess there's gonna be some big changes if all of the sudden I spread my seed and nine months later a mini-me shows up.
If I have to choose something really funny in the text, I would choose "Dan Aykroyd is my baby's father". That was a good one, Calabrese. Keep it up.
You know, if my husband keeps me in the hospital for the playoffs, I'm going home and packing us up that very afternoon, ya snot! LOL
Thanks, it gave me a good belly laugh as always.
you did make the right choice, and this comes from a mom of three! But I was at THAT VERY GAME in Pittsburgh when the Charges came back to beat them and 35,000 stunned Steeler fans left the stadium totally quiet and confused..yep i'll never forget that day back in..oh wait...you said '83? No...this was the 90's for sure..hey, they did it at least twice??? That changes everything...I'd like to revoke my agreement....
My first son was born on a monday night. in september. smack dab in the middle of the third quarter of the giants beating the bears. i had a bet on the bears. my dad didnt make me pay up. He said I had been busy; and you know that fans at home, in front of their tv, have such sway over the outcome of the game. My husband held my hand and watched the game on the "in room" television. what a guy!
Mr. Calabrese, your writting gets better and better every time I visit you site!
This one is your best yet.
Thanks for a great laugh to start my day.
Oh!Jeez!
I have never laughed like this in the blogosphere!
Papa of the cone head baby!
How is cone head doing now?
You are too much!
Everything about sex is messy.
We always clean up after sex.
The period is another messy period and pregnancy is another nine months sentence of hard labour and finally maternity is another long sentence of nursing the baby.
Women bear too much.
What can men do without women?
I really enjoyed this. LOL Reminded me of both times I was pregnant. had to have that macaroni and cheese, made with velveeta.
"Honey, you better get down to the Jewel and buy some more velveeta. Do it now! Oh, and don't forget the Taco Bell"
Thanks for your advice. So what you are really telling me is that I should get re-listed with the Army during pregnancy?
What would be the right time to come back? A couple weeks after birth?
I might need to consult you later on this one.
Great post! Had me cracking up!
See you around on the BOTB's
Another hit, Tony, very funny - and the pride and love (for both your children and your wife) shines all through it!
I got pregnant bending over to pick up a sock off of the floor! To my horror, I received not ONE "bundle of joy" but TWO!!!!!!!
They'll be working for a sweat shop as soon as they can sew though...
I love them to pieces.... No more for me though!!! I have to watch my back when i'm bending over to pick up socks!
That's amazing that your son piddled on a stick!!! When we found out there were two babies and not one I got an "I only wanted one baby" response from my other half... Sweet huh?! 
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