Tell me about your mother....

Gravatar I agree with the ruling that automobile trunks should have escape hatches - but is this really necessary? Maybe we could just bury people with cell phones, so they could call us if they revive.


Gravatar The alarm thing is nothing new. Back in the medieval-type days in the British Isles, a lot of people used pewter for plates, and for some reason they ate a lot of tomatoes on those pewter plates. Some chemical reaction that I can't fully remember occurred between the pewter and the tomato acid, causing a degree of dementia and eventually a sort of zombie-like state of being alive, but looking dead in the people who dined on the mixture. The demented would wander off down the road and succumb to the zombie-stuff, and people would come by and discover them, cry, and promptly bury them.

So flash forward a few years, when some people were robbing graves for various medical and nefarious reasons. The openers of the graves were finding lots of scratch marks on the inside of the proverbial pine boxes, with corresponding broken fingernails or bones on the corpse. No one knew what was going on (no GCMS machines like in CSI back then), so to prevent burial of the still-living, they started a new tradition. All of the dead guy's friends and relatives would lay the body out at the family home, sit around the body, and make a lot of noise by telling stories of the dead guy, getting drunk and boisterous. The thinking was, if the celebration/mourning got loud enough, it would "wake" the dead. Hence, the wake.

This occurrence of scratch marks also spawned the practice of some people running ropes or strings or pipes or some other connector leading from the coffin to a bell mounted on the gravestone -- just in case the "dead" guy wanted to signal that he's ready to come alive again. Call it an early form of "saved by the bell."

Yes, I'm a font of useless knowledge.


Gravatar Boomr- that put's it mildly. We love it. Still, why not just bury a guy with a cell phone and an itty bitty antenna stucking out of the ground? You know, i'll bet we could make a fortune with that idea...


Gravatar Burn 'em all.

That way, you won't have to worry about their having been alive.

I'd like a viking boat piled with aromatic woods; once floating away, fire a few flaming arrows at me as i fade into the horizon...

Make sure I'm wearing the helmet with the horns...

Thanks!



Gravatar Aromatic woods? Very posh, indeed.

Personally, I would not mind hickory or mesquite charcoal...peachwood just wouldn't do it for me.


Gravatar I'm with miguel on this. Give me a Viking funeral anyday. No need for the wife to jump on the boat, though.


Gravatar no, no, no...

i INSIST the ex-wife jump right on the boat...

muahahahahahahahahaha!



Gravatar Now, now, now, Miguel. If I recall correctly, they usually did strangle a few slave girls to accompany the Viking on his journey. Heterosexism, or maybe the other Vikings just weren't that loyal.

Did anyone else notice that the teacher who got the two students to burn her car is still employed? Is this not taking union protections a bit too far?


Gravatar Hey, are you feeling ANY better yet?




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