I'm with you, man. We have free uVerse with DVR for the month (waaaay to cheap to pay for this shite!), and even though I like to pretend I'm above it, I just end up watching the worst of the worst. Indulgently. Guiltily.
Yesterday I had to talk Jason into sending away for a digital converter, you know, just in case we need to watch TV come February.
My addiction to TV was so bad, that my husband could yell in my face, and I wouldn't even hear him. Now, we've gone almost 6 years without a TV, and if I get even close to one, I'm glued to it. Even the ridiculous music videos played at Burger King suck me right in.
We bought a TiVo and "lifetime" subscription on eBay. I'd say we watch the same amount of tv, only now we always choose something we want to watch instead of looking for something worth watching. We simply have a full menu of shows we like- heavy on Nature, Nova and Good Eats (and Curious George)- and can see them at any time.
My first love was TV. It is still one all the time in our house. My husband was raised in Africa so he got his first TV when he was 8 and got a brother who cried a lot. We still have not worked out the kids and TV thing.
I will say though that tivo is the world's best invention. Not only do you watch shows faster, but you can also feel good about not being sucked into the consumer culture (or at the very least tell people you are not).
I lOVE this post! I feel the same way, exactly. The mantra at my son's daycare is, "We don't even have a TV". That translates to "we have a small tv, but no cable, and the kids watch tons of videos but it's ok because there are no commercials."
I love tivo. It's true that you watch the same amount of tv, but at least it's the shows you want to watch.
My Dad had the exact same reaction to anything remotely sexual/sensual on TV. And to this day, he has the same reaction to feminine hygiene commercials: wordlessly getting up and leaving the room. EVERY DAMN TIME.
Anyway, we got a Tivo in February. Not sure if I watch less TV, but I definitely watch better stuff (less flipping from channel to channel), and I rarely see commercials anymore.
Eh, I love TV and yeah, I do think you end up watching less TV when you have Tivo. There is less of that, "We'll just watch this until Lost comes on," or whatever, with Tivo.
But I have no shame.
I had a Tivo in my last apartment. It was there when I moved in and I grew hopelessly addicted to it over the summer. I started watching stuff I would never even consider watching otherwise- I would Tivo shows like Oxygen's "Snapped" about women who murder their loved ones or every rerun of Jeopardy. It definitely lets you be discerning with your tastes, for better or worse.
I kind of am relieved I live in an apartment without it, there is not ever a "waitlist" of Tivo-d shows hanging over my head. If I remember something is going to be on that I like watching, I'll watch it on my normal cable, but it is not as accessible as it was before.
I like to say of TiVo: "They can have it when they pry it from my cold, dead hands." I am not exaggerating when I say that TiVo changed my life for the better. Mere words cannot express how much TiVo rules.
You can tell TiVo to record every program that ever comes on with certain words in the title or description. That way, if some subset of ESPN is broadcasting the European gymnastics championships at 3:00 in the morning on a Tuesday, TiVo will faithfully record it for me (since I told TiVo: "Record EVERYTHING with the word 'gymnastics.'"
And above all, ABOVE ALL:
FAST-FORWARDING THROUGH ADVERTISEMENTS.
If I can watch an entire fall's worth of TV shows without ever seeing a campaign ad, I will be a very , very happy woman.
sarah: I think it will take about 30 seconds from the moment my wife reads your comment before she orders the tivo. I am somewhat certain she has yet to consider the gymnastic opportunities.
I've gone from one of those "my child will never watch tv!" parents to one of those "damn it, why did I have to get one of the kids who won't watch tv!?" parents in the span of oh, about twelve seconds. I test all the cartoons out on him about every other day just to see if anything sticks, but so far no go. I just dream of the day he sits and watches something for a half an hour WITHOUT ME.
Parent of the year, over here.
I find I watch less television for myself when I watch Nickelodeon or DVD's with the kids. After they go to bed, I'm sick of that screen and turn to my laptop. Now, I beat myself up for spending too much time on the internet. Maybe it is human nature to feel guilty about SOMETHING at all times.
People who say they "don't own a TV" or "never watch TV" (besides being insufferable) just mean they watch TV shows and movies on their crappy laptop screens.
Tivo basically rules all. After we got ours, I tried to convince my mom and dad that they needed one, too. To the point they thought I was secretly working for Tivo or had purchased gobs of Tivo stock. But I'm telling you, it's just that cool.
I will warn you though -- if you find yourself on the Spanish telenovela channel for more than a few minutes, Tivo will assume you LOVE telenovelas and will record them all.
Oh, and I got a warm fuzzy when you mentioned Ernie Harwell.
I have the TV on all of the time too. It's background for me. I almost never just sit and watch it -I'm always doing something else - multi-tasking - a little Grey's Anatomy while folding laundry or sorting through a manuscript.
Oh, and btw, Tivo is the bomb! It's one of those things that you don't think you need but when you get it you wonder how you ever lived without it.
I, too, had a tiny television in my room as a child and do not want my daughter clutching any voices in the darkness. I went the direction of no television before 12 months, and 1-2 hours of television OR videos per day now that she's 2.
My husband and I went without any television (except fuzzy PBS) for about 8 months. It was good for weaning! I learned that I could read... or chat on message boards. HA. I do think my tolerance for internet surfing is less than my tolerance for TV watching. I am a marathon TV watcher if I give in to the demons. And I have read a TON more novels than I did pre-baby.
So... it's yet another thing we try to balance over here. No obsessions any one direction or the other. SIGH.
It's ironic I suppose. Before getting married again, my TV selections were limited to about three shows, which if I was lucky enough to catch when they were on then fine. If I missed them, then at least there would be repeats.
After getting married, my wife introduced me to a whole slew of shows, many of which are intelligent and witty like House. Of course there are several at the opposite end of the spectrum too - ANTM. When she realized I had DVR with my Direct TV I think is the moment my wife actually knew she wanted to marry me. I didn't even know how to use a DVR until she came along.
Fast forward. We recently moved to an area where the cable provider doesn't offer a DVR box. "We need TiVo," my wife declares. I was less than thrilled about shucking out more money on top of paying for cable, but trying to watch the season premiere of one or our favorite programs on the computer because we missed the original airing proved to be somewhat inconvenient. The next day we bought a TiVo, and I'm sitting at home in our new place waiting for the cable guy to show up sometime between 8am and 8pm.
Reading your post, I realized I've come a long way from the days of growing up with a TV requiring a pair of needle-nose pliers and a butter knife to change back and forth between four channels. The A-Team never looked so good.
I love tv, and no longer have any guilt about it. DVR (or tivo) may not make me watch less tv, but I am able to pause or record something for later in order to get up off my butt to do something productive more easily. And skipping commercials is a major plus.
I think Tivo has helped me to watch less TV, in that it's made me so much more impatient with live TV. Tivo spoils you in a sinful, wonderful way. The ability to fast forward through commercials in programs I've recorded has left me intolerant of actually watching live TV and sitting through commercials. So, when I don't have anything recorded that I want to watch, I typically just turn the TV off.
Which isn't to say there aren't times when I find myself watching VH1's Top 100 Red Carpet Moments in a slack-jawed stupor.
you don't watch less tv, just less crap tv that you don't want to watch. if you are like us you'll tivo old start treks, dep space nines, etc etc. Oh? you aren't that dorky? Well, you'll find something to tivo...Saved by the Bell, perhaps?
Oh, yes Tivo will enable you to watch an incredible amount of obscure "educational" tv that you would normally miss because you are living an actual life. It also eliminates the need to watch commercials and I think that in itself is worth the extra monthly fee.
One note on Tivo that I think is never mentioned: as a parent it's a _great_ tool for keeping control over what your kids watch. You record the programs you approve, and then they get to choose among those. Win-win. Approved programs, but perceived choice by them.
-greg
being able to zip through commercials is great, but being able to rewind and see something again might be even better: i'm an inveterate daydreamer (read: the attention span of a gnat), and sure do appreciate it when the DVR will slow down and indulge me with the same scene a few more times. especially useful for "the wire" and particularly non-sequential old "x-files."
a down side: i now forget that there are no do-overs when i'm not at home and will slack on keeping up with a key scene when i'm, say, in a movie theater. TV, you old rogue, finding new parts of my brain to atrophy!
aside: one doesn't want the kids to clutch disembodied voices in the darkness, to be sure, but i would make an exception for dorothy.
ah, DirecTV, how I love thee
we went for 6 months without cable when we first moved here, and I survived (mostly on PBS)
but I love having a DVR and access to some of the better/edgier shows being produced for cable audiences
I agree that it makes me feel like I have more control over what the boy watches, plus there's a built-in time limit - "you can watch one show, kiddo, that's all!" - instead of getting sucked into an endless stream of nick or disney programs.
Bea Arthur came to speak at my college. I knew one of the kids assigned to be her "student escort" for the day. Every time she made a request she prefaced it with "Not to be a c**t, but..."
Seriously.
"Not to be a c**t, but can I get a glass of water?"
"Not to be a c**t, but is there a phone I could use?"
Amazing woman, everything I dreamed she'd be.
Getting a DVR with DirecTV also meant that we could buy the NFL Sunday Ticket and watch as much football as we wanted, flipping back and forth between games to watch a good one instead of getting stuck with whatever's the "feature" that week. I think there are similar packages for all other sports.
And yes...ditto what everyone said about skipping commercials being awesome.
Also with a dvr, you can keep the tv off, preventing your kids from overwatching, and you can also dangle recorded [insert kid show here] in front of them for good behavior etc. I think it's awesome and I don't know how I lived without our dvr setup. We actually have three and I STILL miss some shows I want to see. I agree also that you watch the same amount, but its all things you WANT to see, no wasted time, much better time management.
We went without cable when we lived in Chicago because the budget was too tight. We watched the entire That 70s Show series because that is what was on at 10pm when my husband got home from work. We did watch more PBS and local programming though, which was good. Bollywood movies on in the background on Saturday mornings, Wild Chicago and a PBS series set in Scotland. Amazing how the TV shows you watched during an era conjure up so much.
the scarecrow and mrs king! the things you forget that whiled away so much time.
that show with the bikers and carnies, i just watched that for first time yesterday. boooring. lots of hard looks and snide smirks, with some ball cutting and drugs and sex. fun.
I read somewhere that watching TV while doing other (less stimulating) tasks helps someone with ADHD focus better.
It always has for me.
We were EARLY adopters of Tivo, and now we have two, which shows you how much we love it.
Tivo turns TV into the equivalent of a book -- you are in charge, not the media. Want to watch TV? Fire up Tivo and see what there is. Have to go do something else after 15 minutes? Tivo will wait for you and hold your place.
It is beyond liberating. You may not watch less TV, but what you watch will be exactly what you want for yourself and/or your kids.
I was not allowed to watch TV as a kid and when I was in my late teens and early 20's I was super addicted to it (esp. super krappy shows). Now, I don't own a TV. I can't afford cable, so what's the point? I rent DVD's of shows, or download them, or watch them on Youtube. I still participate in TV, even though I don't offically have one. Although, I watch a lot less (since I have to go out of my way to do so) then I would, if I owned one.
We beat my husband's horrible TV addiction by switching to a DVD player and projector. We can watch videos, but only if we haul out the screen, get the projector out of the closet, plug it in, connect the speakers, etc. It helps. It has such a great picture (80" screen) that we can't stand watching anything on the laptop, but the whole setup is way too fragile to leave out with a toddler around.
Et voila, we are the parents that everyone hates at preschool because the only things our son has ever seen on a screen are (1) the Cars video while sick and immobilized for a week and (2) a YouTube video of Fred Astaire dancing on the ceiling.
My almost-3-year-old has only been exposed to shows on TiVo. We always fast forward through commercials. The other day we happened to be watching something on live TV...a commercial came on and he started hysterically sobbing, "what's happening, mommy? what's happening?" Such a sheltered life...
We went TV free for 18 months because we hate Comcast and would not pay them any more money.
Fast forward to August:
We relocated to a new state, and spent a month in a furnished apartment w/cable and 3 tvs. It was glorious.
Now we have the option of FIOS. There is a serious debate going on in our house whether or not we should get "tv." We got a lot accomplished in those 18 months and the kids did really well in school...but there is a shared experience that goes along with tv that should not be discounted.
My man and I have talked about getting rid of TV for a couple years now, but we never quite have the guts. Just when I thought we were ready to make the call this time, I realized that it was almost hockey season, though.
When we broached the topic with our kids (ages 9 to 1
, our daughter said she wouldn't mind because "we really could be doing something much more wholesome with our time." I kid you not. When I explained that I thought they were all as wholesome as they needed to be, she clarified that there are better uses for their time, regardless.
Really. We have DVR and we do tape our "trashy" shows (What Not To Wear and the Dog Whisperer) so when we do need an hour of winding down we have them at the ready.
My dad is a professor of TV/Film at an art school. I grew up watching a lot of media, but always with a critical eye. There is a way to have you kid to grow up with a healthy relationship with the medium. Watch with them and talk about it with them. Answer their questions. Let them see things a little bit over their head. It's okay.
long time reader, never commenter. (i love this post, i hope i will not use the tv as a bbsitter for my kids, though i am sure that it has saved many a parent s sanity.) i was very reluctant to get a tivo. but it s such a wonderful thing. i never want to be without again. best thing about it: no more commercials that rot your brain much more than the actual (bad) tv you watch. also it s a timesaver: a one hour series will take approx 41 minutes to watch. am also familiar with uverse (allows you to record more than one program at once, not really necessary for me personally)
Ever the hypocrite i'm off to google tivo and work out if it's available in the UK.
I totally agree with Alice, a couple of comments up - there's a way to watch TV with a critical eye and an open mind and actually get a LOT out of it. I got a lot of my general education through TV, and I'm not just talking about pop culture. If you do it right, watching TV can be just as worthwhile as reading a Stephen King book, or hell, even a "classic."
FWIW, I majored in TV in college, and have worked in TV ever since, so all those years of preparation have really paid off.
P.S. Tivo is a lifechanger, for all the reasons above.
One of the worst things about my kids' generation is that they'll never know what it's like not to have instant tv gratification. DVRs make traveling with little ones a bitch! We get to the hotel and my kids are all, "put on Curious George!" and, uh, it's not on, and they have zero concept of what that means. They think I'm just punishing them.
I used to sometimes think I wanted to stop watching tv because it makes you seem more intellectual. But that's bullshit. I'm no longer ashamed to admit that I friggin' LOVE TV. My husband and I get a lot of excellent conversation fodder out of our DVR. It's something I'd never want to give up!
I have tivo and I definitely watch less with it than I did without it. Now I only watch things I actually like...and I think tivo is good for kids too because you can IGNORE THE DAMN ADS.
@ sarah: i do love that my tivo, too, records all gymnastics stuff! i still get to watch the olympics whenever I want...its excellent...
my husband and i are "letting it [the tv] go black" on feb 17th, 2009, about two weeks after our first baby is due. are we insane/obnoxious/gluttons for punishment? more importantly, what will we do without King of Queen reruns at 10 every night? I imagine we'll become those people who lose all knowledge of pop culture while simultaneously gaining an addiction to the internet so severe we'll need a 12 step program in order to PUT DOWN THE FACEBOOK.
Seriously though, this post was pure genius and i think i peed myself a little bit from laughing.
Bossy will write something clever in one minute. She's waiting for the commercial.
My husband didn't allow himself a TV for about 20 years! We finally bought a "living room jumbotron" (42"). We don't have cable but use the TV for Netflix. And now...my husband complains that we have the SMALLEST. TV. EVER.
I just keep track of what's on TV by reading USWeekly (my addiction of choice).
You are exactly with me on this one-- watched a lot of TV as a kid, wondered if I could have Been Somebody without it, and now I just try to manage my addiction.
I'm going to buck the trend, in a way, and say don't get TiVo, but instead get a standalone DVR with TV Guide On Screen. Mine's a Toshiba, and I have loved it for 3 years now.
In addition to charging you for usage, I think TiVo actually lures you into watching more TV, by monitoring everything you watch and record and finding anything and everything else you might like. That's just channel surfing for you, with the only difference being that it covers 24 hours and you don't miss any parts of any of the shows.
I can look up shows and movies by theme/genre/etc., but mostly I just think of shows I want to see, tell my DVR to record them in the way I want (weekly, daily, anytime/anywhere, etc.), and that's it. I only watch things that I've recorded, and I can do so at my leisure, without the anxiety of "missing something" or being at my TV when commanded.
I mostly record movies and a few shows, while my wife records more than a few, but between the two of us, we never watch anything live (and certainly no commercials-- this honeymoon must be ending soon), and I often watch mindless TV in double-speed, thereby watching less than ever.
Ever tried watching Late Night in 20 minutes? You should.
You are all a "LOST" generation!
One of the girls I babysit play the theme for Golden Girls at her wedding & dedicate it to me & her bridesmaids. I laughed through tears. Let's throw a party & see who brings the biggest gift!
We managed to not expose MiniMe to the tv until after she was 2 yo. I think largely she just wasn't interested, because I DID watch while I was nursing many times, I recall. I am wondering how no we could manage to shield a 2nd baby, as PBS Kids is the only way I can read these blogs or write mine.
No Tivo in our house, either. I'm scared. Oh, & broke, too.
You'll watch just as much TV with TiVO, but in my experience you spend less time watching "King of Queens" just because it happens to be on, and more time watching something you really do want to watch - like "Family Guy" or "Intervention."
My brother-in-law moved in with us a few years ago and introduced us to Tivo. Now we couldn't go without. When he moved out he had to buy us one for Christmas. It's definitely an addiction. I love it for a million reasons, everyone else has also covered the high points, like skipping commercials, and the instant-replay button (no more "what did he say?"). I love never having to miss my favorite shows, and being able to save the more grown-up shows until the kids are in bed. However...we have no doubt discovered many more "favorite" shows than we ever would have. Something sounds good? Well Tivo it and watch it later, oh, wait, now we like it and we're sucked in. So the other side to this all is that we continually have a backlog of shows to watch, and often get to the point where I have to do a "Tivo maintenance" to make room for the new shows we don't want to miss. It's kind of made TV-watching a chore. Not that it's a chore that I hate, it's just one more thing to do that probably...ok, definitely...keeps me from doing more important stuff.
As far as Tivo Suggestions - when your box in new it will record some weird shit. Once you use it for a while it gets "smarter" about what you like. You can help it by giving shows thumbs up or thumbs down. Oh and you can also totally disable this feature.
I do hate paying the Tivo monthly fee especially since they sneak in lots of advertising - nothing you can't choose not to watch, but still. Why am I paying?
We have since acquired a cable box with DVR to go with the fancy new TV (the old one died.) It is newer and thus has a bigger hard drive and records two channels at once and means we only have to have one box instead of two (we needed the cable box anyways in order to get HD shows and my husband had his heart set on Olympics in HD.) But I much prefer the controls and menu structure of Tivo, and it is a little smarter as far as not recording reruns and duplicates of shows that are already recorded.
Wow! Sorry for the dissertation!
See, I grew up watching the same stuff - 70's and 80's sitcoms, TONS of TV at my house. And now I can barely stand it. I watch like 3 whole shows a week, MAYBE. My child digs it and I let her watch a little now and then, but I personally seem to have too many hobbies to sit and watch TV. My husband on the other hand seems to have it on every waking second when he's in the house. YAWN!
As a teenager it was B&W TV next the my bed with late night episodes of M*A*S*H and U68.
When I first moved to Northern CA from the East Coast I met a pretentious twit at the dog park who said he didn't watch, or have, a TV. His dog's name was Nietzsche. I could have smacked him in the mouth. Oh, but he did watch "films".
I've got a toddler and she has damaged my brain more than the television ever could.
I bow down to Tivo and 40 saved episodes of Sesame Street.
You crack me up!
I also grew up with the t.v. as normal background atmosphere filler. On a purely anecdotal note; I believe learning to read, study, change diapers, fold clothes, write with the TV on has enhanced my multi-tasking abilities over the years. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
we haven't had a tv for three years, but are total hypocrites in the amount of mindless time spent A) reading blogs B) watching tv shows online
there's something about it that helps us unwind after work...
Two things-
1) Agreeing with a previous comment, I find myself wanting to "rewind" talk radio, or the occasional live TV show I'm watching, because our DVR has made me think everything can be replayed. (Wouldn't it be wonderful if that were the case?!?)
2) I couldn't help but notice the multiple mentions of Curious George being the DVR'd cartoon of choice... My 3-yr-old daughter loves her some "Monkey" and doesn't understand why it isn't available at a moment's notice at hotels or Grandma's house!
I remember two things, the glow of that tiny little box in my tiny dark bedroom..and the smell. From that tiny little box. Do you remember the smell? 
uggh.
btw-I'm a fellow De-TROITer. Or atleast, I was until 1984, and I LOVE your blog.
I adore my DVR and can't imagine life without it. It's so useful---fast forwarding thru commercials; pausing live TV when necessary; watching a portion of a show over and over and over again just because it tickles your funnybone (my hubby routinely watches the scene in Fargo where Steve Buscemi gets thrown naked off the hooker a million times in a row just because he finds it hilarious).
The only downfall is, you'll expect DVR everywhere. Seriously. You'll try to pause a movie you're watching in the theatre with your non-existant remote. You'll want to rewind the car radio while you drive because you want to hear the traffic report again. You'll try to fast forward thru temper tantrums. It's frustrating when you realize everything isn't in your control like your TV now is.
DON'T BELIEVE HER. I definitely watch more TV now that I have a TiVo. But, do buy a TiVo... because it eliminates the commercials and you can appreciate the artistry of the television shows unsullied by consumerism.
I do think that TiVo makes it easier to watch the shows that you actually like to watch instead of just whatever crap happens to be on, because if you're busy at 8 and can't watch ANTM then (...for example...), then you can always watch it later instead of filling the void with Parental Control.
oh, i love this post. the t.v... once my nemesis, best friend, time sucker. it carried me through the first six months with infant twins. then it just turned off. i have no time for the thing. i find myself recalling it might be a useful tool at some point in the later afternoon toddler melt down land. i turn to nogin or pbs and see if they will just sit for a minute to zone out. i mean, the kids never ever sit down. and they studiously ignore it in favor of interacting with me. gah. in truth, i am glad they are not terribly interested. we like being outdoors, we like the radio and ipod and raffi. we do not seem to really like t.v. much. anymore. except for those dirty little secret shows like rock of love and my husband's fascination with alien shows. now the computer, whole different story. obviously.
It is a battle in our house every day. You can't live with it and you can't live without it....as much as I try.
i recently received a tivo with lifetime subscription as a gift. i don't have cable, but the new tivos work great with over the air digital signal! i do watch way less tv now... and it's stuff i actually like, instead of another jon and kate plus 8 marathon.
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