I see that this was written just over a year ago - but to me it is still relevant. It was a wonderful read on this Friday afternoon, as I sit in a law office slurping down soup and casually looking over Westlaw. Thank you, for your insight and perspective.
I enjoyed this read as well, sitting in a law office, trying to muster up the courage to quit. Been a lawyer for 5 years now and need out before I become a James that I never wanted to be.
From James to Dutch...
I have a friend who's twin brother is named James. She tells me that post-college when they were both home for the interim she could always tell what era his calls were coming from by the handle the caller gave him: Jim, Jimmy, Jay or James.
This stuck with me for a long time - the relevance of such a funny little sentiment. That we are all struggling with the truth behind your Hawthorne quote. How finiding our "true selves" in the midst of the many changing social settings we encounter is an extremely difficult thing.
But I have to say that some are blessed more than others (or, from a very new-agey way of putting it, "chosen for ourselves" subconsciously or otherwise) with the support of amazing people who make these decisions to follow the path less chosen easy and leading to no injurious ends.
In my African Lit class, for example, most of what I've read tells how following your heart was, for many, a deathwish.
There was no Wood making it all possible. No BFF taking care of the basic necessities while the other waxed poetic about a child's daily experiences. And I say this as a SAHM who gets it, one who gave up the career for the importance of the "now" in raising children. But for me it was a choice; perhaps a pesonally difficult one in leaving behind an integral part of my identity to form a brand-new one. But it was a choice.
How do we reconcile this with those who do not have that choice - no "Wood" on the other end handling the essentials so we can do above and beyond for our children? Because this question is at the very heart of many impoverished places, your city being one.
I appreciate your contribution to society as a SAHD, all that you do to broaden the minds of your children. The role model Wood is to girls who deserve to realize their own potential. To boys who value women's abilities, and their own emotional capacity.
And I appreciate the work your wife does in supporting your endeavor, and hers as well. I appreciate more than anything the workable solution the two of you seem to have found for the age-old dilemma of doing what feels natural vs. what society anticipates.
To put it succinctly, I appreciate what the both of you have done for the world at large, on your own little micro level to the macro level of your contribution to our future society.
But I also know in secret that it is a priveledge to be able to put energy into things like strolls through local fruit markets and elaborate Halloween costumes. We have obviously figured out how to manage the charmed life to our highest ability, now how can we help those who haven't the time or money to find these "enjoyments" in parenting?
How can we move beyond what we are able to give to our own and begin making a difference in the lives of those who find it futile to:
fall in love, go to college, buy healthy food, make a home, make a career, wash their hair, call their mom, be a mom, etc...
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