Don, your post on Robert Greenleaf’s childhood and family life brings out some aspects of servant leadership that resonate with my own experiences.

In my own life it has been the dysfunction in my own family and work that drew me towards finding a better model of living in community with others. Being a recovering alcoholic myself, it was in the AA program where I first heard about the concept of servant leadership in AA’s Second Tradition. The Traditions are a series of twelve principals that the founding members of AA came up with to guide their fledgling organization. Much like the better known Twelve Steps that were designed to heal the individual, the Twelve Traditions were designed to ensure that the organization kept it focus on helping to heal it’s members. The Second Tradition states, “For our group purpose there is but one ultimate authority – a loving God as He may express Himself in our group conscience. Our leaders are but trusted servants; they do not govern”. This basic concept of servant leadership is what drew me towards learning more about the power of servant leadership.

As I started learning about servant leadership and trying to practice it, I found that one of the best places to learn about the power of its use and the consequences of not using it was in my own family. There were times when it was comparatively easy to try and practice servant leadership with strangers or people that were not close to me, but quite difficult to start using it with my family and people that were close to me. I have come to realize that until I can learn to use servant leadership concepts, such as listening and treating family members as equals, at home; my use of them outside the home is meaningless.

I have often wondered how many of the addictions that afflict our society could be healed if our families and organizations practiced the healing art of servant leadership. So thanks for bringing up an interesting aspect of Robert Greenleaf’s life that helps me to better understand and accept my own.
Tom J | 11.28.05 - 4:15 pm | #

Tom,

You have been doing good work in your life. "Bill W," one of the founders of AA, was one of Bob Greenleaf's good friends. Greenleaf once wrote that he wished he could belong to AA because of the community it created. Like you, Bob was also impressed with AA's "Twelve Traditions" because they were congruent with AA's mission and vision in theory AND in practice.

Dr. Murray Bowen, creator of family systems therapy, said that one's family of origin could be seen as an emotional unit. When one member changes, as you did, there are ripples throughout the system. The one who is changing can expect pushback because, even in a dysfunctional family, the balance has been disturbed. The key is to calmly wait out those responses without being hooked back into old emotional patterns. This requires a kind of personal rootedness that I think evolves when one takes servant leadership seriously. Greenleaf taught me that I can't change the past and can only control my own responses in the present, but the paradox--and the good news--is that when even one person in a family changes, the whole system shifts.

Thank you for the post. You've got me thinking about wider implications of servant leadership that I hadn't considered. You have the experience and moral authority to be a powerful teacher to the rest of us on these matters.

Don
Don Frick | 11.29.05 - 8:56 am | #

Don,

You are far to kind. I have a long way to go in moving from the theory of Servant Leadership to its practice, just ask my family.

Anyway, I didn't know about Greenleaf's connection with Bill W. That is pretty interesting. Are you aware of any biographies on Greenleaf in general and in particular on his connection with Bill W?

Thanks again and enjoy the day.

Tom
Tom J | 11.29.05 - 9:50 am | #

Don,

I just found your two books and placed an order. Looking forward to reading them.

Tom
Tom J | 11.29.05 - 11:00 am | #

Tom,
I didn't have room in the biography to include all the details about Greenleaf's relationship with "Bill W"(his real name was Bill Wilson). Bob wrote some articles for AA publications and was impressed by it as a model of an organization that embodied "spirit." There's no way to connect the dots and demonstrate AA's direct influence on Greenleaf's later servant writings, but in my humble opinion the influence was real and powerful.
Don
Don Frick | 11.30.05 - 9:34 am | #