Sadly, I can relate
Hey PBS...I tried to go to yur Homepage but it wouldn't connect...use my E-mail and give me a sqwuak...or post a comment as to how y'all can relate...did it happen to you also...LOL?
Funniest damn thing I've read in months. Too bad you don't have a foto of that! With cellphone cameras, we'd get a pic today if it happened on a navy boat now.
I think there's a song or a jingle in there somewhere, let's see...
Maxwell House
Maxwell House... Good To The Last Turd!
Maxwell House... Tastes As Good As It Smells!
Folger's
Submarine Turds, It's The Richest Kind!
The Best Part Of Waking Up Is A Load Of Shit In Your Cup!
We've Replaced Chief Negri's Coffee With A Load Of Shit! Let's See If He Notices!
Thanks fer the nice comment JD...and Sig..."Best part of wakin up...load a shit in yur cup...lets see if he notices...good Sig..good.
Hadn't thought about the commercial aspect afore...bet there's some other witty folks out thar that can come up with some more.....
Sorta like "Chock Full a Shit" coffee...
Chock full o' Peanuts 'n' corn 'n' eeeeeeww...
Nothing quite like the undivided attention of a senior NCO. I bet the COB was scarier than that picture of Teddy.
Link Whore Alert!
Hie thee over to my blog for a rendition of "Cookie's Big Advenure."
Cookie-
Not sure why my post isn't coming up for you. However, I emailed you my misadventure as well. Enjoy!
Fluffy...now that I recall...he was scarier than that bear...much scarier...and I definately had his complete and undivided attention...thanks fer stoppin over t'the shack......
PBS...yur homepage link wurked this time...I'll be over to check y'all out shortly....got yur E-mail as well and I'll be readin it also here in a bit....
Sig...put an addendum in this post about you and yur absolutely great musical/score talents....thanks agin mate...
Ha! I got a good laugh out of that. What I wanna know is, did it improve the taste of the coffee?
What did you do that prevented the shit from not getting pushed out of the sub but into the coffee maker? was there a problem with a valve or pump you didn't say but claimed it was your fault.
Todd...earlier in the account y'all might remember that I kinda stressed the "Outer" San Valve...well sir...it appears that somehow...in all the confusion of valve openings and closings I was doin....it was closed. My biggest mistake was putin 40 lbs of pressure on a valve and in a system that was only designed to withstand about 30, 35 at the most, lbs...plus remember...these were old boats....
Wade...cain't answer that question cause truly...nobody would drink outta the damn pot after that...major psychological brick/shit wall it was....
Sadly, this is what happens when Navy sets out to sea all by their lonesome with no adults onboard.
One of the few things I've never done and always wished to, was run silent run deep. Been on some drydocked boomers, ancient WWII era subs and assorted old cans from living fairly close to the Brooklyn Navy Yard, and had some duty in Portsmouth N.H. for a time, but never went down.
Fits...I'll give yur ass some Adults mate....just hadda take a shot at the Navy didn't ya.....just couldn't resist could ya...Marines never change. Well mate...yur last comment told us all alot about ya..."never goin down" that is.....when it come t'women...Sub sailors go down all the time...(sorry if'n I offended any women out there but he started it)....
...and of course, I had to come across this while having my first morning cup o' joe! Ewwwwwww!
Cookie, that has to be the funniest damn thing I have read so far this year...by anyone! Folks will be hard pressed to top this one.
You're a big man to fess up to it.
Confession is good for the soul-and it gives the rest of us a hell of a grand laugh!
WTR...you'll never look at a cup a Joe the same now fer the rest a yur life without thinkin of poor young sub sailor who really got his tit stuck in a ringer (remember those)...ooops just gave y'all anuther image..
Thanks mucho fer the nice compliments...mi amiga....
Oooops...WTR...when I said "remember those" I was referrin to Ringers...not the other things...
I WAS WONDERING WHEN YOU WOULD GET TO POSTING THAT STORY. I'M STILL LAUGHING OVER IT. I'M STILL TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHY THEY DIDN'T STRAP YOU TO A TORPEDO AND SHOOT YOU OUT THE TIBE! DT
DT...I think the COB probably thought a that but the Captain wouldn't let him.......
Thanks for the heads up on this one. A true classic. Can't say that I ever did it myself but it happend twice while I was on the Picuda [ss382] to non-qual pukes such as myself and both times in tubes aft. Can't even say I witnessed the aftermath because we avoided that place like the plague as we feared the COB would put our sorry asses to work cleaning up the mess. When I get back to posting next week I will have to link up to this one. Thanks buddy, I needed that one. The Old Muser!
Cookie, I laughed for a good five minutes reading this story. This is great stuff!! In fact, I had to show it to my wife, and she completely enjoyed it, too. Which is amazing, because it's tough to make the woman laugh. Good job, brother!
Great read Cookie, funny as hell.
Makes me glad I was a jarhead.
Dayum, I thought I pissed off a COB. I remember one time on BREAM a below decks watch forgetting to close the sink drains in the messhall on the 4 X 8 one morning but there was no one around but him. Although he was still trying to clean up when the cook showed up. Thanks for the laugh.
Hey Stevin...really great t'see y'all back with us man...and true thanks t'ya fer the nice rave's....glad you and the "better half" got a laff or two..
Jan Z...thanks fer stoppin by...any old jarheads are welcome here (I'm also an old Seabee)...in fact one a blogroll..."Shooting the Messenger" is an old Marine...I really likes to bust his ass I do...Semper Fi Jan...
Myron and Ted...glad you old bubbleheads could take a break and stop by...glad y'all gotta good laugh...thought ya would...
cookie, just about every submariner that rode boats has a "blooey" story.
here's mine http://bothenook.blogspot.com/20...ea-
stories.html
Bothe...read yur story...that must have been a "rude awakenin"....and what a shitty way to start the day out. Question...did ya out-rank him...and if so...how much "shit" did you give him after that...?
Bothe...thats me in previous comment/question.....
cookie, no i didn't outrank him. we were both 2nd classes. i was a nuke, and he was an A-ganger. i did pay him back, but it took a while.
...ya...ain't revenge sweet...specially when its served up cold....
I was in the tin can navy [and gator navy] and have heard a lot of sea stories but this one is the best. I almost shit myself from laughing so hard... I never had a run-in with our senior masterchief. He could be a real bastard when provoked. I was in operations as a Radarman and pretty much stayed away from him.
Jim Foley USS Benner DD807, USS Thomaston LSD28 1968-1972 Vietnam Vet
Jim...mucho thanks fer the nice compliment mate...took me a couple a days to get back to my computer...first Memorial weekend and all...attented a Memorial Watch Fire...and now...got some kind of bu that has knocked the livin shit right outta me...man...its still makin my life miserable.
Used the love the boys on the Tin Cans...we used to say that during bad sea's...you guys should be gettin Sea-pay, Sub pay and flight-pay...all at the same time...take care my friend...stop by agin....
LOL 
hy cookie good story. i hope you remember me as 1st class cook. JIm
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