Peace and good morning...
I was thinking of yall as I caught a lil bit of the LA boys rapping on BET last night...
Speaking of which... Yall like Afroman? That's my boy.. Akakah!
But anyway... I still bang Kurupt's song on this topic.
I do disagree though. Coming from a black school, I seen alot of women who didn't fully 'respect' themselves the first couple of years... Now, they are different people.
Not sure what's up in this case though..
not DJ Quik again...ha ha....any dude that goes to the beauty shop more than my girl.....somethin' ain't right.
Just playing Esq....'Tonight' is my jam!...but dj quik will never be on my top anything
Good looking Big J!
Paul, Stop hatin! It wasnt just Tonight. Every album, with the exception of one (Way 2 Funky) has been the bomb.
Candidly, I pride myself on being a nearly 30 y.o. attorney who still knows the words to every song on Quik's first album!
I saw him in court a while back. I made sure to approach him and tell him that despite the suit, I will always be a fan!
I'm not mad at them. If he wants to try to calm her ass down, why not?
Quik is a legend. His music is so regional that I understand ppl from other areas when they yawn at him or recall a song or two.
RJ - Bombudd and The joint w/Hi C and AMG on the second side of the 1st album was my shyt! All you LA cats should remember Gin and Socko?
Sasha,
You're kidding right? The chick is in a worldwide porno.
KP, that song is called Skanless.
Was listening to it just the other day. Quik is the Name stays in my car at all times.
If dude went to Cal or even UCLA there wouldn't be as much uproar about this. The SC fans are irritated because their hero turned out to be lame as hell. Bill Maher got a few jabs for superhead but this guy is getting a post per month.
I'm not very familiar with Kim Kardashian. I know she has the sex tape with Ray J. Is that all that the "ho" label is based on or is there something else? I see them all the time on Bossip but they never say exactly why she's a ho.
No, J. I'm not kidding. She made a sex tape with a dude she was dating. And soooo?
She's happy. He's happy. Why do you care?
Thanks for saying that Sasha...
It's sad that people are so quick to judge and classify people. People can and do change...
Very interesting how people like to cast stones but I'm sure if we dug a little deeper we would find a whole lotta 'ho'n' going on in a lot of 'State of' posters pasts....
Let's judge not, lest you be judged!
Sasha...are you seriously saying that it shouldn't be a problem for her current famous boyfriend that she has a tape on the Internet with her past famous boyfriend?
That's showing the same level of common sense as Paris Hilton.
Who can take a woman who shows that type of judgement seriously? I certainly wouldn't want that to be the top influence on any future daughters.
""Who can take a woman who shows that type of judgement seriously?"
that's a perpective i can respect a little more than just calling the girl a ho.
But the bottom line is that none of us really know either of their stories or why they make each other happy.
i really don't like labeling people because of choices or mistakes they've made, simply because they have been exposed when many of us have made similar mistakes but were able to keep it to ourselves.
Maceo:
What I'm saying is that if he has resolved that issue with himself and with her, WHY ARE Y'ALL TRIPPIN? Are you seriously saying that because of a sex tape she's not deserving of a presumably loving, committed relationship? Tell me why she is deserving of the slanderous title of "ho" just for that?
NOt saying she should be the influence for your daughters. Hard to find any "celebrity" or pop icon that should be, sex tape or no sex tape. That's your wife's job.
And from what I've read, she didn't put the shit on the internet, Ray J did. So where is her lack of judgment? In making the tape in the first place? Not buying it.
Sasha,
she made money off of the tape. so it's assumed that she agreed to putting it out.
"Are you seriously saying that because of a sex tape she's not deserving of a presumably loving, committed relationship?"
that's a good dam question.
Stirring the pot here...
Men, what exactly is the problem with Kim K? She had sex (and all that that entails) with someone she was dating. Do you not "do" all the stuff Kim and Reggie did on that tape? Or is it just that you dont tape it?
Someone explain.
RJ:
I think their problem is the publicity issue. Of course men want their women to be freaks in the bedroom. they just don't want other niggas knowing about it, and they certainly don't want other niggas to have SEEN what their woman does. So I think the guys have a problem with the fact that Reggie is proudly walking around with a woman who has a released sex tape out with another known figure. Reggie is supposed to be repulsed by this, especially since he could run into Ray J in the club.
And let's not forget that if a woman is involved with more than one dude in the entertainment industry, she's of course branded a ho. Didn't Erykah Badu become the hip-hop ho?
I don't know. What say you penised ones? 
LOL. I think Sasha's first paragraph in the post above sums it up.
And Cookie...no I'm not suggesting that she doesn't deserve that relationship...I just can't comprehend why a brother with a choice would deal with the stuff Sasha detailed in her first paragraph above!
Men are possessive and have strange ways when it comes to other dude's in a lady's past. Knowing this, it is awful judgement for a lady to have a tape of that sort with a guy who isn't her husband. What a nightmare.
If I was the dude who is suing Reggie Bush and his family I would send photos from that tape to the crib every day just to throw Reggie off his game!
I don’t get Reggie; but hey, it must be love. Because why on earth with so many top shelf sisters out there would you choose someone with a porno on their resume. Start practicing that conversation with your future kids now El Presidente.
Reggie could do better.
He's walkin around holding this broad's purse like a pussy whipped puppy.
Not to say that he shouldn't hit that. ( I know I would...in my single days ) But c'mon reg. Couldn't you just pull up to the SC campus and grab the hottest chick no one has ever of? Oh wait! I forgot that he's been banned from all things USC.
On 2nd thought. Maybe Kim is about as good as it gets for Reg.
Big Wayne
Sasha, are you a man? I believe RJEsq asked the men to respond -- just kidding.
Anyway, since both my penis and I are free, I will respond to the question -- Sasha pretty much nailed it.
However, I did want to correct you on two things. It was Kim & RAY J's sex tape, not Kim & Reggie's. The name similarity could be another insult to injury issue. The other was your misinterpretation of Maceo's comment. Bro. Maceo meant if Kim K. was ultimately gonna be the mother of Reggie's daughters (not she should be a role model b/c she's famous), but I agree with you that she should not be a role model for anyone's child.
I am not a fan of sex outside of marriage, but I understand that that view puts me in a minority of men (and women). Until we come up with a commonly accepted number of sexual partners that factually defines a ho, or man-ho (more than likely the numbers would be different for each gender....it's like poking a sleeping bear) it will up to individual interpretation what makes someone a ho.
Some examples of currently accepted definitions: If you have slept with more people than me, you are a ho OR If you have ever slept with more than one person in the same 24 hour period, you're a ho OR If you have slept with multiple people at the same time, you're a ho OR If the square root of the number of people you have slept with is >6, you're a ho. Those are just a few examples.
In response to Cookie's comment,
"i really don't like labeling people because of choices or mistakes they've made, simply because they have been exposed when many of us have made similar mistakes but were able to keep it to ourselves."
I have to ask. Cookie is there a video that you are keeping to yourself? Maybe, "How to Heat Up A Cookie?"
wow. no. no video.
the point is that it's easy to find fault in someone who's up on a stage in the spotlight, while sitting in a pitch dark audience.
but you bring up a good point: if i did have a video that i managed to keep to myself and i was Reggie's chick, the same guys that are ridiculing him for being with Kim K would be dapping him up for being with an 'on point sista', all because you haven't seen "how to warm up a cookie". That doesn't make sense.
I have a theory (and bare with me here, it's not totally fleshed out) that has to do with the sexuality of black women v. that of white women.
Black women cannot do one ho-ish act without being branded for live because of it. I think it's more acceptable for white women to explore their sexuality with as many men, women and hell even animals as they want to and when they're ready to be a wife and a mother, all is forgiven and it's time to move on. Let a black woman slip up and get too drunk at a party and exercise poor judgment. She will never see a diamond ring in her lifetime unless she moves to a different state.
This is why you have terms like "experimenting" or "lesbian until graduation" when you're talking about white women. This is also why you find that black women are less likely to give head. We don't want to slip up and get the ho brand.
Oh I forgot to connect my theory to the topic... In conclusion, Kim K could never have bagged Reggie Bush if she were black and had a sex tape in circulation. If he's going to date a white woman, he has to be like a white man and not care about stuff like that.
"This is also why you find that black women are less likely to give head. "
Is THAT why? Sistas?!!
Pink, true dat true re: "if he's going to date a white woman, he has to be like a white man and not care about stuff like that." In fact, it seems they rejoice in that fact -- look at how Pamela Anderson gets passed around like a doobie....or maybe, AFTER a doobie.
Didn’t Rick James say something about the “kind of girl you don’t take home to mother”
call me old fashioned, but to me there is a difference between a women having a lost weekend or two in Vegas and a women getting a sexual beat down on DVD. But hey, that’s just me.
"This is also why you find that black women are less likely to give head." -pink
Y'all want some truth? This is part of the reason sistas can't find a good brotha and these white girls and Latinas are cleanin up!
I'll explain.
It starts with the sex...just as Im sure it did with Reggie. Bag you a hot young "other" (as we used to call em). Its so good you gotta go back for more. But when you go back not only do you get a great session, but you get arroz con pollo or chilean seabass to boot! Hells yeah!
Next time you go back, you get a great session, a great meal, and you know that knot in your back that's been naggin you for a couple days? That gets worked out while you watch Kobe drop 40 on the Suns.
Then the brothas like, damn! I got this hot chick with a bangin body, who serves me, cooks for me, caters to me...When was the last time a sista did all these things?
And there you have it.
Look, don't make Big Wayne the culprit here. Don't shoot the messenger. I'm only the messenger
-game by Big Wayne
Wayne, I tend to look at things like this.
Yeah, there may be some tight white Bentleys on the road, but aint one better than that Black one over there.
Ugh, Big Wayne I don't like it but you're probably right. But here's the rub: how do black women do all of that when black men are always trying to give us that ho label???
Big Wayne you can really miss me with all that 'other' females cater to their men better than sistas do. It's flat out not true.
The difference is all the wreckless behavior they let go unmentioned.
No, you're not gonna be up in a sistas house all stretched out on the couch getting massaged and whatnot then go kick it for 3 days and when you come back it's still all good.
Hell naw! They can have that. Negroes need to man up and behave in a manner that's deserving of the special treatment. Simply having a penis and being around sometimes is not good enough.
Wayne,
I wish you'd make up your darn mind.
Last week the chick had to be damn near virginal for you to be interested.
Today, you offer thorough sexual service and a meal as advice to sistas on the market.
GTFOOH.
" Yeah, there may be some tight white Bentleys on the road, but aint one better than that Black one over there. " RJEsq(my peoples)
I feel you RJ. But sometimes the black bentley has a blown engine, leaks oil and only looks pretty while sitting idly. If you look at only Black bentleys, you might miss the silver Maybach that's just callin your name.
"Ugh, Big Wayne I don't like it but you're probably right."
Probably!? Girl, you know I'm on point.
"how do black women do all of that when black men are always trying to give us that ho label???"
On the whole, we look at white women as far bigger ho's than black women. White women (and Latinas) sometimes have a submissive nature which allow
men to overlook their pasts. Remember even more important than a chaste woman, is the man's need to FEEL LIKE THE MAN! If you can do this, you can get away with a lot. ( I didn't tell you that)
Big Wayne you can really miss me with all that 'other' females cater to their men better than sistas do. It's flat out not true. -Cookie
I can't say this as a blanket statement which applies to every woman on earth. But from my own and many others personal experiences, it is largely true. But culturally, certain women are reared their whole lives to be nuturing to their man and family, EVERYTHING (including...especially career) comes 2nd. Most Black women aren't raised this way.
" No, you're not gonna be up in a sistas house all stretched out on the couch getting massaged and whatnot then go kick it for 3 days and when you come back it's still all good. " -Cookie
No disrespect, Cookie. But this sounds like the typical response to be expected from an angry/jaded black chick. (not that you are either) But it is this exact mentality which holds black women back. Why? Why wouldn't you take care of your man if he didn't show up everyday? What if he lives 30 miles away and works closer to home? What if he has to wake up an hour earlier and sit in traffic an hour longer when he spends the nite at your place? What if he is simply pacing himself in the relationship?!
See what I am saying? Your mind instantly went to " AW HELL NAW " Instead of thinking of ways that it could work. I will say it again. It is this exact mentality holding back Black women.
-more game by Big Wayne
" Wayne,
I wish you'd make up your darn mind.
Last week the chick had to be damn near virginal for you to be interested.
Today, you offer thorough sexual service and a meal as advice to sistas on the market." -RJEsq(my peoples!)
HAHAH!!!! Ok RJ. I see you wanna go a couple rounds today. Can't wait for Dina to jump in.
Ask your great great grandmothers. The best way to a man's heart is through his stomach.
And a more accurate way of summing up my thoughts would be, if you're already sleeping with a man, and you want a shot at keeping him, Feed him. Nuture him. Don't compete with him.
Your chances will go through the roof.
-constant game by Big Wayne
"Why wouldn't you take care of your man if he didn't show up everyday? What if he lives 30 miles away and works closer to home? What if he has to wake up an hour earlier and sit in traffic an hour longer when he spends the nite at your place? What if he is simply pacing himself in the relationship?!"
None of your examples have anything to do with what i said. I said out kicking it, not working. I also didn't mention or imply anything about spending the night.
My point is that men too often want a woman to be submissive with no questions asked. If you're missing in action for days at a time, or displaying other flaky characteristics, how can a woman feel comfortable to trust your judgment and submit to you? Do you really want a woman that takes whatever you dish out? Really?
How can a woman feel protected when you're clearly exhibiting signs of being in it for all you can GET rather than being interested in an exchange where both parties are happy and fulfilled?
What you're describing is usery. My brother used to only date and is now married to a white woman. I know all about that. What's the point in being with a man if all he's interested in is what you do for him?
You didn't mention anything about the character of these women, or of these men for that matter.
Big Wayne, it seems to me that black men who want to accept the flaws of a white (or any non-black) woman, do so because they simply want a non-black woman. They seem to value the whiteness itself. And if black women are not valued on the same level then all of our "flaws" become the focus and things that would be overlooked for that white woman become the things that define who we are.
I hear what you're saying when you say that we can overcome something like ho-ishness if we're more nourishing, but I don't believe that non-black women tend to be more nourishing than black women. Hell, I know black women who have stood by crackheads.
I've never been one to say that a wife-type must be a virgin, but a porno on the internet is a no-no. I don't care who put it out, who made money on it, etc. NO. (But Kim K can work it pretty good though . . . ) If the ho wants to be loved, let some other succa love her.
I agree with those that say Reggie would not date a black woman with a porno on her resume. Most black men covet non-black women for whatever reason. I know plenty of 30-something niggaz who bitch and moan about not finding the right woman and then end up marrying "other." My theory is that too many black men watched their mothers get their guts beat out by various niggas. (Note: single moms, don't let your sons watch you date. They will hate you forever.)
Men want women who are more pure than themselves. This is natural. We want a clean woman to bear us healthy children and take care of our home. Now, some of you sistas who have ho-ed around for years will poke your lips out and give some feminist excuse about why it's "not fair"; but it's the truth whether you like it or not. Learn it and live with it. You can't suck 20 d-cks and then complain about not having a husband.
Sistas would get far more husbands if they covered themselves and got more in touch with their maternal side and shut up a little bit. You don't have to sex a guy; just cook and be quiet.
Cookie...stop fighting me!
I didnt' make the rules to the game, you didn't make the rules, but at least I know them. And I'm tryin to put YOU up on game so that you know how to play. Big Wayne got married 8 months ago.
"If you're missing in action for days at a time, or displaying other flaky characteristics, how can a woman feel comfortable to trust your judgment and submit to you?"
Well, not coming over your house is a far cry from missing in action. What if dude calls you everyday during the 3 days you last saw him. Does that count? In my experience, relationships are frequently...FREQUENTLY ruined by 2 people spending way too much time together way too soon. 3 days in between is ideal. Enough time to miss each other, but not too much where you start looking elsewhere.
" How can a woman feel protected when you're clearly exhibiting signs of being in it for all you can GET rather than being interested in an exchange where both parties are happy and fulfilled?"
This is a process. I don't dispute that men can initially have selfish motives, but as the relationship grows this evolves.
" Big Wayne, it seems to me that black men who want to accept the flaws of a white (or any non-black) woman, do so because they simply want a non-black woman."-pink
Yeah, there is some truth to this. But most likely they weren't born into this preference. They developed it. Where do you think it comes from?
-endless game by Big Wayne
Big Wayne: Where do you think it comes from?
Pink: I'm guessing self hatred???
Pink..that was way too easy. I was hoping you didn't jump at the response requiring the least thought.
The answer is "Experience".
Big Wayne
I've actually thought about it (as I've said, I have a theory regarding this) and the conclusion that I keep coming to is the same. They think they hate me, but they actually hate themselves. For every loud mouth opinionated black woman, there is one that is docile and desperate. If they're looking for a victim, that can easily be found in any community. The myth of the strong, black woman, is just that: a myth. It's been used generation after generation to destroy the black family, but I don't think it's ever been true. I find it hard to believe that experience has taught black men that they can't find a black woman that they can walk all over if that's what they want.
So if the answer isn't that a lot of black men are simply looking for weakness and unable to find that in black women, what else could it be that has them running from black women in droves? ...Self-hatred. It may sound cliche, but it fits the bill.
Big Wayne,
How do you explain white chicks knocking on the door looking for my brother saying they haven't seen OR HEARD from him in 3 days then the next day he's picking me up from school in her car?
You may, indeed be spitting truth about the game, but participating in said game is an option, not a requirement for marriage.
I know some good men that aren't looking twice at a white chick for the very reasons you're listing.
We can just agree to disagree.
"Well, not coming over your house is a far cry from missing in action."
Where are you getting this arbitrarily miscellaneous details from? lol
Whoa!! This is beginning to feel too much like the past few days after Obama made his speech on race. Some white folks can't get what he was saying. It seems like y'all gonna have to agree to disagree are far as this issue is concerned.
Although Wayne speaks from his own experience, there are some kernels embedded deep within his statements. One of the most poignant is that a man needs to be nurtured. Brothas want to be appreciated just as much as women do. One of the things that seems to come out when having this conversation with black women is the anger and resentment toward brothas dating others. What's worse is that when and if they find a good brotha the assumption always seems to be that he is a dog until proven otherwise. That might work with the dogs, but a good brotha will perceive that lack of appreciation and often go where he can find it. Personally, I would prefer a woman that has standards too and doesn't just appreciate every penis that comes along.
Wayne posts are a little simplistic because sex, cooking and massages are not a checklist and BAM! you have a winner. I have dated a women of different hues, races and nationalities and have ultimately had my needs unmet by all of them. Life goes on. Though Latinas drive me absolutely crazy, the right sista will too.
"For every loud mouth opinionated black woman, there is one that is docile and desperate." -pink
Docile does not mean desparate. Docile minus the loud mouth and desparation is ideal.
"The myth of the strong, black woman, is just that: a myth." -pink
Yikes! Did you really just say that? Are you a black woman?
" They think they hate me, but they actually hate themselves"
I dont' think anyone hates you. Or thinks they hate you. They just may not prefer you. Hate is a strong word.
" So if the answer isn't that a lot of black men are simply looking for weakness..."
Tsk Tsk young lady. Allow me to highlite the flaw that pervades the thinking of many Black women. You've heard me mention of cooking for your man, sexing him right, and nurturing him. Somehow, your jaded mind has instantly equated those actions to "Weakness". THIS IS YOUR PROBLEM!!! Don't raise your daughters with this mentaltiy. If you are available, I hold seminars on the weekends near LAX. I can have you in a relationship by the Summer.
" Big Wayne,
How do you explain white chicks knocking on the door looking for my brother saying they haven't seen OR HEARD from him in 3 days then the next day he's picking me up from school in her car? "
Much like Big Wayne, your brother's gift may be his curse. And he is, likely, taking advantage of those chicks. I didn't say that this never occurs.
You may, indeed be spitting truth about the game, but participating in said game is an option, not a requirement for marriage.
I beg to differ. Like the Lotto, you gotta be in it to win it.
Listen Ladies, I am not here to dismiss your perspectives as being impossible in certain cases, but you would be remiss to dismiss mine.
Many women, instead of looking within themselves as a possible source of the disconnect between themselves and black men, just pull the "Hate themselves" card as what I like to call a "coping mechanism". This way they can rationalize to themselves how happy they are in their lonesome. When, in fact, they are miserable.
-niagara falls of game by Big Wayne
Cookie, we can agree to disagree.
Where's Manar's mom when you need her?
I could use an extra set of testicles around here.
Big Wayne
Big Wayne: Your mind instantly went to " AW HELL NAW " Instead of thinking of ways that it could work. I will say it again. It is this exact mentality holding back Black women.
Preach!
(and you can add not hitting the gym to that list...it applies to most)
CJ: One of the things that seems to come out when having this conversation with black women is the anger and resentment toward brothas dating others.
I don't think that this statement is true. It's definitely not true for me. I think people should date who they like. The problem that I have with Big Wayne's statements are not that they promote interracial relationships, but that they demean Black women by assuming that we all fit into some stereotypical box of what people expect us to be. I would rather you say "I date Becky because she's an amazing woman who I really click with" than "I date Becky because black women don't nurture or support us and get on my nerves". Not only is that insulting to me as a black woman, it's also insulting to your white woman because rather than acknowledging her qualities, you're saying that you're with her as a fallback because black women have failed you. The man that I'm dating is white and I have never felt the need to justify my relationship by putting down black men. I don't see how you can be a black man and not know any black women that put these stereotypes to rest.
You make good points and I wish you and your man well.
Speaking from my experience most black women take it very personally when a black man dates someone outside "the fam". It seems to trigger some inherent "What, a sista's not good enough for you?!!" gene. I am glad to hear that you react differently. On the flip, I have heard that same thing about being "failed by black women" from some brothas dating others. I would rather hear the positives too because some of the white women aren't much to look and you know there MUST be something else about her.
Sorry for leaving for hanging Big Wayne. Manar has been on a feeding frenzy today!
Anyhoo, you are 100% on point and single women should be paying attention. You droppin' knowledge.
I don't think the definition of ho has to do with how many sexual partners a woman has had as much as it has to do with how she carries herself. A woman could screw 100 guys, but if she is discreet and carries herself with class, no one would be any the wiser and would still treat her like a lady.
Kim K. deserves to be called a ho because she carries herself like one. Yes, because of the sex tape. If she cleans up her act and starts acting like a lady, then the label will no longer be appropriate. Kinda like a fat chick who loses weight is no longer fat. A ho who settled her fast ass down is no longer a ho.
But if it walks like a duck and talks like a duck, it's a damn duck and we don't need 50 comments on a post to debate the nature of duckiness.
Big Wayne: You've heard me mention of cooking for your man, sexing him right, and nurturing him. Somehow, your jaded mind has instantly equated those actions to "Weakness".
Pink: Actually, what made me think "weak" was the combination of docile and submissive nature. That's pretty much textbook weak right there.
As far as "the strong black woman" just because a stereotype seems positive and we may be tempted to embrace it, that doesn't make it true. Just like thinking that all black men have big dicks. Sorry, not true. They're both old stereotypes that justified slavery and still persist. That myth has been used to justify black women's prosecution for hundreds of years. Don't believe the hype.
I would like to see a woman screw 100 guys and have no one be the wiser about it. There are at least 101 people that know and only one of them is being discreet.
Noooooow, I think we've hit 50. Quack, quack.
Women are by nature submissive. That's what femininity is. Embrace it.
Big J, So you see women as a weaker sex? I can accept that. But then you have to see the problem that I have with the myth of the "strong black woman". You can't have it both ways. If being a woman means being weaker and black women are viewed as these superwomen, there's the dilemma. We're constantly being held to standards that are contradictory and impossible to reach.
"Women are by nature submissive. That's what femininity is. Embrace it."
I'm with you. trust me. when it comes to the whole cooking and nurturing bit, i'm that chick. It's not wise though, to pull out all the stops for a guy that's not doing his part as well. That's what i often find with men that give the argument Wayne is giving.
Big Wayne,
answer this question for me.
"Its so good you gotta go back for more. But when you go back not only do you get a great session, but you get arroz con pollo or chilean seabass to boot! Hells yeah!
Next time you go back, you get a great session, a great meal, and you know that knot in your back that's been naggin you for a couple days? That gets worked out while you watch Kobe drop 40 on the Suns."
Where is the balance in your scenario?
Why is she sexing, cooking for and massaging a man that's "pacing himself in the relationship" and still making up his mind whether or not he's coming back?
That's bogus! Do this 2 or or a few times and by the time the right guy does come along, you're all used up!
It's a two way street and you have yet to mention what he's bringing to the table to prompt the nurturing. He just arrives? No way!
Cookie,
Let this settle in before you reject it. Read it twice.
Since there is such a shortage of "good men" in proportion to the amount of women seeking them, then mathematically, one of the following will occur:
a. Some women will secure some good men. However, not all will. Those who don't will be left to seek companionship among lesser men, among the other women not fortunate enough to secure one of those good men, or left alone.
b. One or multiple of these "good men" will be shared by the women seeking them.
These are your choices. You will fit into one of these categories. Where do you want to be?
Understand that the progressive man that you would deem as desireable has options. Of which you are one.
Big Wayne has 3 sisters and a mother who he loves dearly, so don't think of him as a chauvanist when he says, that to get a good brotha...you gotta compete!
And in order to compete effectively, you must know the rules. You must know what men want (not only sexually) and be able to fulfill those voids. Here is where I come in. I'm tryin to put you up on game so that the white homie your dating doesn't shake because the Asian chick gave an amazing shiatsu!
You gotta do what the other chicks that are vying for his attention won't..or don't...or can't.
And if that means cookin a meatloaf because you remembered he mentioned loved his mom's meatloaf. You better git yo ass in that kitchen!
Now, of course you don't open yourself up to every man who comes along. But if a brothas gotta drop a ring on your finger to get some Chicken fettucini, then it's gonna be a long road ahead.
- seminar type game by Big Wayne
Preach!
Bruh, as much as I LOVE the odds that scenario gives me. The prospect of finding love is bleak. Just as I would never want to be a woman's fallback because the man she truly loves dumped her for another woman, I also would not want to be with either a desperate woman or one that is forced to play a game.
I won't even get into the fact that according to your outline a woman has to act in a stereotyped fashion for every man she is with and hope that he picks her. That is downright depressing for women (and me). I take heart that, as bad as the dating scene can be, I don't use the women I date like joysticks (i.e. to play games).
And, getting back to the original discussion, how in that scenario does any woman not end up being a ho?
CJ
Where are you coming from? Are we even on the same topic? Nothing in your last post really seems pertinent to the conversation. But I'll try and sift through your words to find a meaning, and offer the following response:
If the scenario I've outlined seems too far fetched for you to fathom, consider, for a moment, that you weren't one of the brothas I was talking about. Those brothas grasp full well the magnitude and truth to my words. No disrespect.
" I won't even get into the fact that according to your outline a woman has to act in a stereotyped fashion for every man she is with and hope that he picks her. That is downright depressing for women (and me)."
You don't understand women, I see. So, let me offer you this pearl. And pay close attention. You ready?
Women who have been fortunate enough to be married, have in fact BEEN CHOSEN. Quietly, amongst women, this is what separates them from the rest. (That's a whole other argument, in which I will gladly engage) That someone recognized them as valuable enough to devote his life to. That a (presumably desireably) man saw them as MORE valuable than all the random pieces of ass that litter the streets.
Regardless of depressing this is to you (which I cannot understand how this would be depressing to a heterosexual man...please enlighten me) Do not discount the wisdom which may surpass your very own.
-infinite game by Big Wayne
Wayne, although there were some nuggets above with which I did not entirely agree, I must say, all in all, very well said homie.
i've only read the last few post but CJ...there are plenty of good single woman out there (e.g. RJesq).....u just gotta go get them... 
"get to know her b4 u love her"
(from a woman who has learned/is learning to embrace many of the things you wrote about).
Thanks P! I try.
BW, no disrespect, but it's hard for me to imagine you have wisdom that surpasses my own when you cannot even understand the questions I pose. Furthermore, you did not address my final question. So I'll put it another way, how can woman truly be her own woman when her only purpose in life is to cater to a "good man"?
Where is the sense of being equally yoked with your woman? The numbers are always in our favor, so why do the rules of the game have to be as well? You can say it is just a statement of fact, however, in your scenario the concept of love and, quite possibly, monogamy seem absent. Why? Because we are reminded daily that CHOSEN men step out on their spouses -- something you seem to excuse because some Asian chick has a bomb shiatsu. It would always be one-upsmanship unless love is in the equation. THAT is my underlying problem with what you're puttin' out there.
If a "good man" -- your quotes, not mine, equals this progressive man that can't do for himself and must have a women that cannot question, but at all times does what her man wants her to do, then I don't think I am one of the brothas you discussed. I guess that would make me a righteous brotha off the map of your outline.
-Righteous Game Forever
Paul, thanks for the vote of confidence. I'm literally surrounded by good women, but just because they're good and I'm good doesn't mean we're compatible. That has been the bane of my existence. Fortunately, I am working on something with a wonderful woman right now. We'll see how it goes. Peace.
Commenting by HaloScan
