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\"Gravatar\"TRACI!

This is an incredible article. Thank you for sharing how YOU put your family first. I am going to incorporate many of your habits into my own life. Like you, I don't travel--many people are stunned that I don't attend social media conferences and conventions like Blogher. I just don't--maybe when my children are older, I will. But for now, I am home with them. But I could definitely do a better job setting business boundaries and sticking to my word.

Your article is so honest and touching--I think as mothers we all cling to the notion of putting our family first but I wonder how many of us do. You gave such good, solid examples of how we CAN do that.

Thank you so much.
Heather
Heather Allard | Homepage | 07.09.09 - 2:03 pm | #

\"Gravatar\"This topic has been a difficult juggling act for me. Thank you for sharing what works for you - I hope these tips can work for me (meaning I hope I can stick to it!!)
Heather | Homepage | 07.09.09 - 2:04 pm | #

\"Gravatar\"It's interesting to see a value statement like \"I put family first\" laid out in concrete, real terms. I think I will do the same, because it seems like a very worthwhile check in.

One thing I am absolutely certain of is that for me, trying to work while the kids are at home is NOT putting family first. I get extremely impatient and don't like the mom I become when I try to do this, so I stopped, even though it seemed like such a paradox. I started this business so I could be home with my kids more.
But then I found that I couldn't work at all with my kids home and was miserable if I tried, so I stayed home to work and had my kids in (part-time) care. Hmmmm.....

I felt so guilty about this, but the truth is, I see my kids way more than I would if I had gone back to work. We have time to go to the park every day. I make dinner every night. And I get to fulfill my own need for something other than my family through my work, but still have the flexibility to drop everything at a moment' notice if need be.

As my husband says, when you're happy, I'm happy. I think this applies to my kids, too. Gulp. So is putting me first, putting family first?
Catherine Choi | Homepage | 07.09.09 - 2:36 pm | #

\"Gravatar\"Great article!

I am a big believer in putting family first. But it can be tough sometimes when the business comes calling!

For the most part, I work 5 full days a week then one weekend afternoon during my son's naptime. I find the preschool pickup helps me to start and end my day on time. My husband and I both shut off computers from 5-8pm every night to have dinner and play with the family. Then we turn ourselves back onto work from 8-11pm typically. Family dinners are my favorite part of the day!

And, I try to pick a weekend day to totally shut off and I don't usually check my Blackberry that day.
Heather Stouffer | Homepage | 07.09.09 - 2:47 pm | #

\"Gravatar\"This is a FANTASTIC post! Magnificent advice, thank you so much!
Lisa @ Crazy Adventures in Par | Homepage | 07.09.09 - 2:57 pm | #

\"Gravatar\"Hi Traci,
This was just the article I needed to read today. I think as mom entrepreneurs we're always divided between work and family. It's incredibly important to have strong boundaries and for your family to be aware of them. I think summer requires us to make adjustments depending on our children's schedules. I believe that one key to being an effective parent (and enjoying the process) is to set aside undistracted time that's fully focused on them.
Thanks for sharing this information.
Kim DeYoung | Homepage | 07.09.09 - 4:42 pm | #

\"Gravatar\"That is a great article? I have one question though, don't you think dad's should be encouraged (or expected) to put family first as well? What do you think?
Sherry Nouraini | Homepage | 07.09.09 - 8:04 pm | #

\"Gravatar\"Let's face it--there is no \"perfect\" situation. We do different things on different days to make it all work.

The rule I try to follow is \"Be where you are\", meaning when I'm with my kids they have my full attention. I'm not thinking about what I have to do for my business. Likewise, When I'm working I'm not worrying about not spending time with my kids.

I agree that family is first. But as entrepreneur moms we have to remember we cannot be all things to all people 24-7, kids included. Sometimes not being there is truly the answer...that's how kids learn to become independent! The fact that my kids tell their friends that I don't work (when I've ALWAYS worked) tells me I'm doing ok.

Balance is fleeting. What works today doesn't work tomorrow but we just move through each day doing our best. I think that's enough!
Karin Ulik | Homepage | 07.09.09 - 9:10 pm | #

\"Gravatar\"An interesting read with realistic parameters. I've always struggled with work/life balance and seemed to have a harder time than most juggling everything. You seem to have it figured out.
sue rodman | Homepage | 07.09.09 - 9:14 pm | #

\"Gravatar\"Wow, what a topic! I struggle with this so much... I have 3 kiddos under the age of 5, launching a new product line and training for marathons.. where do I draw the line? Well I work on and off throughout the days, ie: kids are playing I sneak off and work a little, come back play, etc, work a little on and off through the day. It surprisingly has worked. But I must say at the end of the day, I am so exhausted...But no time for rest, I start to work straight through from 9 pm-2 am Mon-Fri. I just do my best, but am ALWAYS open to advice. So all the great input from my fellow mommies is so appreciated and some ideas will definately be implemented in my work schedule! Thank you!
Dayna | Homepage | 07.10.09 - 3:23 am | #

\"Gravatar\"Thanks for the article. I'm just starting a freelance writing career after finishing university. I've always been busy with school or work and struggle to balance everything. I really need to work out a schedule like yours so I can focus on one thing at a time and not be overwhelmed
Kelly | Homepage | 07.10.09 - 3:53 am | #

\"Gravatar\"Many of my clients come to me for help with time management because they struggle with this very issue- work/life balance. I think the definition is different for everyone. I too set \"office\" hours so that my kids and hubby don't resent my computer and Blackberry. Routine and prioritizing are key to putting family first and still finding time to pursue your other dreams. Thanks for a thoughtful and timely article!
Melissa Multitasking Mama | Homepage | 07.10.09 - 11:50 am | #

\"Gravatar\"Amazing post Traci!

I have committed to building in fun time every day with the kids and they are empowered into the process. It really doesn't take much to keep us all happy -- just spending time together with no distractions!

Our picnic lunch is calling us -- storms are coming so we are having it in the living room on the floor with a movie in and I will make up the extended lunch tonight after the kids are in bed! \"\"
Stacey Kannenberg | Homepage | 07.10.09 - 12:29 pm | #

\"Gravatar\"Traci,

what an honest, candid affirmation that we as mothers, wives and business women share the same struggles!

This subject has been heavily discussed in my house since I got married and had kids. I used to work in the corporate world where it was a very high impact, high demand existence that saw me travelling frequently and working 12+ hour days...days which extended even after I left the office because there was always “something” and my Blackberry was buzzing or ringing late into the night CONSTANTLY. I set no boundaries with my peers or my boss and so their \"interruptions\" just kept on coming.

For my part, I had FOOLED MYSELF into thinking that this meant I was really important when the fact of the matter was this: although I knew just like my peers knew that I was contributing value to the workplace endeavors, the reality is that NO ONE is truly irreplaceable and if you burn yourself out and can no longer \"make it happen\" your magic will be replaced with someone else’s.

Add to the mix that my husband is an active-duty US Navy Aviator who is frequently gone away from home in service to our country, and you've got yourself a Thanksgiving feast of relationship disaster. Though the choice was easy, the decision was difficult...I'll say that again for those who don't get it or missed the point: The choice (my family) was easy, but the decision (walk away from a thriving corporate career) was difficult.

I greatly struggled with it (being a stay at home mom) at first, but through A LOT of communication with my husband & kids and prayer & reflection coupled with my faith in GOD, I have arrived at a place of \"success\" that no job can ever give me...I have arrived at a deeply-rooted relationship with my husband and kids that’s filled with love, hope and the promise of continuous good things to come and for that I am truly grateful.
Charleta Harvey | Homepage | 07.10.09 - 2:07 pm | #

\"Gravatar\"Excellent article!! Now if only I was as organized as you!!!
McMommy | Homepage | 07.12.09 - 8:54 pm | #

\"Gravatar\"The feedback from this post has really been tremendous. I will plan to do a follow up article since so many of you brought up additional great points and thoughts. Thanks for sharing!
The Mom Entrepreneur | Homepage | 07.12.09 - 9:44 pm | #

\"Gravatar\"I have a hard time setting a schedule because my husband's work schedule is crazy. One week he works Mon & Tue, off Wed & Thurs, and work Fri, Sat, & Sun. The next week is reversed. On top of that, he goes from days to nights every four weeks. I have tried setting a consistent schedule for myself, but he really doesn't like it. I would prefer to stay on the \"day\" schedule, but when he's working nights he wants me to stay up with him late. :::sigh::: I love my husband dearly, so I don't say this meaning to speak negatively of him...he says things and I feel guilty of ignoring him. I think he views what I am doing now as a hobby rather than trying to build it to a point where I can work from home full-time.
Jayne Townsley | Homepage | 07.14.09 - 5:14 am | #

\"Gravatar\"I really enjoyed your take on this. I concur with the \"rules,\" as I call them, that keep you accountable. I have to do this for myself, as well, because it is the drive to be successful in business that leads us astray from the family first mission. It has the lure of excitement and personal fulfillment. It is these rules that you detailed (which were great) that will keep the \"moving and shaking\" in check. Good on ya, and thanks for the post.
Marc Warnke | Homepage | 07.15.09 - 1:43 pm | #



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